Natalie cried so much that she wasn't capable of producing tears anymore. It wasn't until hours later that she realized she was sitting on the bare floor thanks to her state of despair and got up to her feet with effort.
Staring up at the vanity mirror, Natalie realized that she was a mess. Her hair was disheveled while her eyes were red and puffy. Eric couldn't see her in this state, Natalie realized. The both of them were getting married and she didn't want him to begin to doubt her interest and commitment to it.
She 'loved' Edward, and it was all in the past, but right now, she felt like a horrible person. Edward sacrificed a lot for her and she didn't even get to thank him one last time before he left this world. The guilt was suffocating her. All she ever does was bring pain and misery to the people around her.