As We Know It

I didn't know Morgan all that well, but Rick and Morgan had a history. We've come to find out that when the outbreak started Morgan was the first person to give Rick a chance, saving him after Rick woke up in the hospital. This meeting wasn't as simple as a reprimanding of Morgan, but instead hearing him out, because he deserved that much from Rick.

"What's going on?" Morgan asked. He had his arms folded over the dining room table, his brows pinched together. I sat beside Rick, along with Michonne and Carol.

"When I was coming back…" Rick cleared his throat, "We tried to cut off the herd with the RV. Lead the walkers away. But two of those people with the Ws in their foreheads, they stopped us. They tried to kill Scar and I, shot up the RV." Rick paused. "Now, Carol says she saw you. That you wouldn't kill those people."

"Did you let any of them go?" Carol asked, her tone extremely weary.

Morgan took a deep breath in and calmly said, "Yes, I did."

"Why?" I asked, crossing my arms over my chest.

"There were five of them. And I didn't want to kill five people I didn't have to kill--"

"They burned people alive," Carol cut him off, growing angry.

"Yeah," Morgan nodded his head before taking a long pause, "Why didn't you kill me, Rick, back in King County? I pulled a knife on you. I stabbed you. So why didn't you kill me?" He asked. "Was it 'cause I saved you after the hospital?"

"'Cause I knew who you were," Rick answered.

"Back there I would have killed you as soon as I look at you," Morgan confessed, almost like he was afraid of who he was at that time, "and I tried. But you, you let me live and then I was there to help Daryl and Aaron. See if I-- if I wasn't there… if they died… maybe those wolves wouldn't have been able to come back here," he pursed his lips together, very clearly frustrated and confused by his own logic and thoughts. "I don't know what's right anymore. 'Cause I did want to kill those men. I seen what they did, what they would've kept doing. I knew I could end it. But I also know that people can change. 'Cause everyone sitting here has. All life is precious. And that idea-- that idea changed me. It brought me back and it keeps me living."

My brain bounced back and forth as Morgan spoke, how different he viewed the world from me, from us. I use to think that way, I use to live that way. But now, living amongst the dead I can't remember the last time I viewed all life to be precious. I couldn't imagine encountering the Governor again and not wanting to kill him for what he had done to us. I couldn't imagine walking into that church and not putting a bullet in every one of those men's skulls all over again. And then, for the very first time, I felt scared of those thoughts, the fact that I wouldn't hesitate to do it all again. Morgan was right, we have changed, but not in the way he would have hoped.

"I don't think having that choice could be that easy," I said.

"It's not easy," he snapped.

"That's not what I was saying--"

"I-- I know," he then calmed down, realizing I was not attacking him. "And I've thought about letting that idea go. But I don't want to."

"You may have to," Michonne finally spoke up, her voice calm and easy. "Things aren't as simple as four words. I don't think they ever were."

"Do you think I don't belong here?" Morgan then looked back at Rick.

"Making it now, do you really think you can do that without getting blood on your hands?"

Morgan shook his head, "I don't know."

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I slept alone last night. Daryl, Sasha, Abraham, Glenn, and now Enid were all still out there. I tossed and turned with the lullaby of walker groans and hissing growing louder from outside the walls. We needed them back, our only hope was for the three of them to get the attention of the dead and drive them away from our walls. This place was a ticking time bomb and unfortunately, so was my head the longer it took for Daryl to return. They should have driven the twenty miles and back by nightfall yesterday, and the fact that there was still no sign of them only made the pit in my stomach grow larger.

Everyone was outside today, helping out where they could. I passed my Lincoln and Rosita teaching a class on how to properly use a machete, some of the residents were tending to the garden crops, and others were helping build up the damaged wall from the clock tower. I made my way over to one of the watch perches, climbing up the ladder and accompanying Maggie.

"Still no signal from Glenn?" I asked Maggie while I peeked through my scope, looking for anything out of the ordinary.

"No," she sighed, "I've been out here all morning."

"He will make it back. I know it," I reassured her. I looked over at her, her mouth sliding up into a smile like she was grateful to hear that from me. But then, tears pricked in her eyes and she started silently crying. "Oh no, Maggie don't cry. Everything is going to be fine," I said, grabbing onto her shoulders and pulling her into a hug.

"No, it's not that," she said sniffling as she grabbed onto me. "Well it is, but-- but if I tell you this can you please not say anything yet?" she asked.

I pulled back from her, "Yeah, of course," I answered.

"I'm pregnant," she confessed and I immediately pulled her back into my chest.

My heart instantly melted. For maggie, but also for that pizza delivery boy, I met in the alleyway. The boy I bonded with and fell in love with sitting in the rec room of the CDC. My very first friend in the new world was having a baby and I would get to be here to see it. "I'm so happy for you," I said softly, finally letting her go. I tried to hide my face dropping when realizing how important it was for Glenn to get back here safely and how stressed out Maggie must be.

"Guys!" A voice called out to us in a very urgent tone. I turned my head, seeing Tara standing below us. "It's Spenser," she said before running off down the side of the wall to the other perch.

I looked over at Maggie, helping her down the ladder before making my way behind her. We followed after Tara, scaling the side of the wall until we reached the other perch. I could see Rick and Tobin standing up on the far one as Tara began to climb up the other closest to us.

"Spencer, get back now!" Rick yelled out to him. What the hell was he doing?

I two-stepped my way up the stairs, hoisting my body up quickly with my arms. As soon as my feet were planted on the deck, I turned to see Spencer shuffling along a wire he had thrown and attached to one of the buildings on the other side, with a hook. He had his hands and feet looped around the cord as he slowly slid down it, his back hanging just feet above the herd.

"Spencer. Spencer, move!" Tara yelled at him, noticing the hook starting to slip out of place from his body weight.

As suspected, the hook shifted not long afterward, still catching on the eavestrough of the roof, but throwing Spencer from his grip of the cord. The wire bounced, causing his feet to drop and hang just inches above the fingertips of walkers.

"Go! Keep moving! Hurry!" Rick shouted at him.

I leaned over the banister, looking down at Maggie, "Go fire off rounds at the perch on the other side! Draw the walkers away!" I yelled down to her. She immediately took off in a sprint back to our original post.

Without thinking twice I climbed over the wall, placing my feet on the angled post and gripping onto the panel with one hand. Finally, the wire slipped from its place for good, sending Spencer flying to the ground. He swung with the cord, his feet taking down the walkers below him before his body collided with the panel walls from the momentum. I aimed my Glock, trying to keep myself steady as I hung off the wall. Spencer got back to his feet as I fired off rounds at the heads of walkers that reached out for him as he went back for the cord.

"Spencer, come on!" Rick yelled, peering over the edge of his perch deck and gripping onto the wire to hoist Spencer back up.

Spencer climbed while Rick and Tobin pulled. I kept firing, one after another, but there were just too many. They clawed at his legs, ripping off his sneakers in the process. But, by some grace of God, Rick and Tobin threw both of their bodies backwards, lifting Spencer those extra couple of inches before he was out of the walker's grasp and climbing back over the ledge of the wall.

I struggled to keep my body weight up as my Glock went empty. "Grab on!" I looked up to see Michonne reaching out for me. I put my Glock back into my holster, throwing my hand over and gripping onto Michonne's arm to be pulled back over.

As soon as my feet hit the deck Rick was yelling at me. "Scar! You've almost died once for these people!"

"What?" I yelled back at him, confused and angry.

"What the hell were you thinking?" He screamed.

"I was thinking exactly like you would have once upon a time! So don't be coming at me for doing something!" I yelled back. He huffed at me before going back at Spencer. I climbed back down the ladder, meeting Maggie from her return on the way down.

"He alright?" she asked, out of breath.

"Yeah, the dumbass is fine," I huffed out.

I then watched Maggie's face drop as the air completely escape her lungs. Her eyes trailed upwards, following something. I turned on my heel, following her line of sight. My heart jumped into my throat as my eyes followed the bundle of six green balloons that floated up into the clear blue sky.

"That's Glenn, isn't it?" I asked. It felt like the entire neighbourhood went quiet, even the sound of the walkers just feet away from us were drowned out by this moment. Everyone watched as the balloons drifted higher. Glenn was out there, alive and safe.

"That's Glenn," Maggie confirmed. I could hear the smile on her face.

All of our heads then snapped to our left. Just as the balloons drifted too far from sight, the echoing sound of creaking and cracking came from the clock tower. My mouth flew open, my eyes unable to break away from watching as the clock tower came down on our wall. The pillar tipped over, the base of it catching the panel before the wood and metal exploded on the pavement. The sound of it was daunting, but the realization was of what was about to happen was all the more terrifying. The wall was down and the walkers began filtering in faster than I could catch my breath.