Regaining of Faith

"Parker..."

On the night of Otto's funeral, Eren found himself dreaming vividly as he does when under immense stress. These dreams, however, were far too lifelike to be just dreams. It was as if he were truly existing in whatever realm he imagined himself in.

"Parker..." Again, he heard a deep, monstrous voice speak his name. He couldn't see a thing, as everything around him was pitch black.

"Parker!" Eren's eyes shot open, though not in the real world. He was still in this perpetual dream state, stuck in a perpetual loop of visions.

He found himself standing in the center of the city, surrounded by nothing more than destruction. Everything around him had been destroyed and covered in darkness. Even without the destruction, the city looked abstract in a way. The buildings were oblong and curving down toward the hero as if the city itself was looking down on him.

"Eren?" He heard Cindy's voice calling to him, prompting the boy to look toward the noise in a hurry, but he saw nothing. "You promised." She said softly, though he could hear the tears in her voice. "You said you wouldn't go back to 𝙄𝙩!"

"Spider..." Felicia was next, speaking to Eren as if she were afraid of him. "You've... changed. You're using 𝙄𝙩 aren't you..."

"𝙄𝙩?" Eren spoke into the empty city, receiving no response.

"Don't let 𝙄𝙩 break you, Eren. It's your fate. It's our fate. We can't break the cycle. I've accepted what's going to happen. You need to do the same." Harry's voice chimed in, sounding as if it were coming from above Eren.

"You're Earth's last hope. Even if you must become one with 𝙄𝙩, the world needs you." Reed's voice was next, further confusing and scaring the young hero as he still had no clue what 𝙄𝙩 was.

"Parker..." That same monstrous voice from before was heard, but not seen by Eren until he noticed a shadow creeping along the ground in front of him. Eren didn't know why, but he suddenly became overrun by fear and started running in the other direction.

"Parker!" The voice grew louder as Eren ran as fast as he could to try and escape from whatever it was that was chasing him.

That shadow began gaining on him, still shouting his name. "Parker!"

"Leave me alone!" Eren shouted desperately, continuing to run through the abstract city until he found himself at a dead end. He tried to climb the wall with his powers, but he couldn't. He wasn't Spider-Man here, he was just Eren Parker.

He turned around, seeing the shadow stop in front of him before it began to emerge from the ground and begin taking the shape of a man. Not just any man, but himself. This shadow was nothing more than his own.

Then Eren remembered something.

Back when he first unlocked Godspeed, he saw a vision of himself being surrounded by darkness in a destroyed city. That version of this vision was far less abstract than this one, in fact, it seemed like a real memory despite being from the presumed future. It was as if he was seeing his future memories.

However, the Eren in this vision was a bit different than before.

The shadow, the black silhouette of what looked like his alternate self, Spider-Man, slowly limped over to the boy like an undead creature, though he had a sick smile on his face that was somehow shown through his mask. Eren soon realized that this was not Spider-Man at all... this must be 𝙄𝙩. Eren was frozen with fear, unable to move as his other self grabbed him by the throat and pressed him against the wall.

𝙄𝙩 unhinged his jaw, opening his mouth wide enough to somehow consume Eren's face whole. The boy screamed, closing his eyes and opening them back up only to find himself floating in the darkness again...

'What was that?' He thought to himself.

'Where am I?'

'What is this darkness?'

'Why is it so cold?'

'Where is everyone?'

'Cindy?'

'Harry?'

'Anyone?'

Those thoughts would remain just that as Eren floated in a pitch-black abyss...

_____________

Months passed and Eren Parker found himself standing outside during a chilling Autumn morning with his hands in his jacket pockets, standing solemnly over his mother and father's graves once again. On that very day, just one year prior, was the day that Eren's life changed forever.

It was the day he'd lost his mother.

The day he'd killed Fisk.

The day he became the Phantom Spider before he transitioned to becoming Spider-Man.

This time, when he visited his mother's grave, he was not alone.

Cindy Moon grabbed his shoulder from behind, comforting him as he placed flowers down for both of his parents. Just like the last time he'd visited, Eren was feeling helpless. Despite months having passed since the Otto Octavius incident, he couldn't stop thinking about it.

He was still terrified about the future. Not just his own, but his friends', his family's, and the city's.

He was still horrified that he too would fall into the darkness like those he'd faced off against. He thought about those visions he'd had before, the ones where he saw himself shrouded in darkness, standing in a destroyed city as if he were the one who'd done it. Along with the visions of himself being chased through a broken city by that same darkness.

These were nothing more than visions, something in his head, however, they still horrified him. He wondered if it was some sort of prediction, perhaps a prophecy was given to him by some higher power, like God or Bast.

The last time he visited his parent's grave, he was questioning if there even was a higher power. Once he visited Bast's realm, however, he realized that there was in fact a higher power out there. However, when his mother told him that his father was 'somewhere else', it led him to believe that perhaps there are multiple gods up there, each having their own realm where their believers reside.

As he thought about these things, Cindy looked up at his pained expression rubbing his back to comfort him as tears fell from his solemn face. Eren wiped his tears and began speaking his mind to his lover, hoping that maybe she could help him clear it.

"I'm scared, Cindy." He confessed.

"What are you scared of?" She asked him.

"I'm afraid of myself and my future." He admitted. "I'm scared to end up like Otto and Dr. Connors... I'm afraid that one day, I'll be the catalyst to the world ending."

"What makes you feel that way?" Cindy asked him.

"I- I've seen myself. I saw a vision, multiple visions, of myself all alone with the world in ruins. I heard your voice begging for me to stop, I heard Harry's voice too... it felt too real. It felt prophetic. I'm going to be the one that destroys everything."

"Do you really believe that, Eren?" She asked him, looking up at him with saddened eyes. "Because I don't, that isn't you. You would never hurt innocent people."

"But I saw it..."

"So what if you saw it? They could just be bad dreams because of trauma... Even if they were actually visions from the future, who says it's set in stone? I believe that we have the ability to change our fate, to choose our own path."

Tears continued falling from Eren's face as he began speaking to Cindy in a weaker, shaky voice. He truly was afraid of himself. "How will I know what to do? How will I know which path to take so I don't go down that path?"

"Have you forgotten, Eren?" Cindy placed her hand on his cheek, wiping away his tears and caressing his face before guiding his head to look her in the eyes. "You aren't alone. You have me and our friends. We're all here for you, Eren. We promised each other that we'd be there for each other no matter what, right? I'll be on the right path with you."

Eren used his sleeve to wipe away the rest of his tears, exhaling to calm himself down. "I know you will be there but what if I hurt you?"

Cindy smiled softly up at her lover. "I guess I better work on getting stronger then, right?"

Eren smiled back at her ever so slightly, exhaling humorously despite his eyes still being filled with tears. "I guess so."

The two said nothing for a few seconds, holding each other's hands tightly as they looked down at Eren's parents' graves. "I really wish you got to meet them." Eren admitted. "They would've loved you."

"I wish I did too..." Cindy told him, wanting more than almost anything to introduce herself to them.

"Perhaps in other life, wherever that destination may be for the two of us." Eren remembered going to the ancestral plane and seeing his family. He wondered if he was also going there when he died, or maybe somewhere else.

"Thank you, Cindy." He told her. "Thank you for always being here for me, even when you don't have to be."

"Of course. It is my job as your girlfriend, right?"

"Right."

"I love you, Cindy." Eren told her, smiling down at his partner.

She smiled back, gripping his hand tightly and leaning on his shoulder. "I love you too."

With their short conversation in front of the Parker gravestones, Eren regained some of the faith in himself that he'd lost not too long prior. Spider-Man wasn't going anywhere, he knew that he needed to keep going.

He didn't care who he had to go through, even if that person was himself, he would sacrifice whatever it takes to protect everyone. Especially his two best friends in the entire world.