In Fish Bed

Fingers feel my skin, as I grab own throat

Hard to breathe, like lungs filled with smog

Grabbing hold tighter round

Choking until heartbeat's only sound

Then it blurs, it all fades away

I release my hands, eyes wandering - they may

Deep breath, I finally can breathe

Although unable to filter all filth

Room is like means to surrender

They say I'm "caved", but it's empty slander

Can't stand their foul mouths spitting lies

And how quickly it burns once one denies

Any other opinion, fact or idea

The shit-storm that follows is like diarrhea

They turn to me lastly to ask to pick side

It's never enough just for THEM to decide

My favourite succulents always are happy

Just water them, give sun, what green and fine chappy

Why don't others make selves likewise?

Why brewing storm, leading to own demise?

Eyes closed, bath filled with water

Inside, deep, warm and nothing could matter

The silence and freedom of my own head

Comfort, soothing love in Fish Bed