Chapter 70 – Dungeon Nine

---Might be a slow week chapter wise, you'll still get 5 but just the heads up---

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(Ikarus) "Looks like we're here"

(Petra) "…"

(Zeki) "Look at that massive asscrack in the earth"

(Ariza) "You're such a child Zeki"

(Zeki) "Bite me"

(Ria) "Oh, is Ariza joining us next time?"

(Zeki) "What? Of course not, you really can be stupid Ria"

Wouldn't you know it, we've taken the dryad to the next dungeon with us for some stupid reason, she already knew about the whole 'secret phoenix thing' beforehand so that wasn't an issue, no idea why we agreed to bring her along but screw it, she's Zeki's plus one so any annoyance she causes will be put on his shoulders. She also has been riding on Zeki's back for the rest of this journey with Petra on mine and Ariza alone. Thankfully, they can keep it in their pants while flying otherwise that would've slowed us down a lot.

None of slept last night, all of the reasons were down to Zeki and Ria. Even after going the other side of the meadow, we could still hear them. It turns out, they both really get in the mood when aggressively fighting, I really wouldn't care so much if it wasn't so freaking loud! Why the hell did she have to show up now?

I guess at least he gets that special 'mate with a dryad ability', still a little curious on what it is but no chance I'm asking about it.

All five of us are currently hovering over a large earthquake looking crack in the ground, there does appear to be a bridge and road built over it but it's lucky that there are no caravans travelling on the road right now.

Oh, can't forget there's two derelict guard towers nearby as well, pretty sure this is where the border of the empire used to be years ago before they expanded towards the city that mother destroyed. There really isn't much of a border security force in the empire thinking about it, elves and beastmen could easily try to invade if they so pleased. Sure, this bridge seems to be one of the only ways on foot towards the main parts of the empire but still.

"Zeki… did you get an ability last night or not?"

Petra! Don't be asking something like that! While we still hovering just before descending, she decides to ask something that personal. I'm interested to see if he'll answer but still, best not to ask someone about their love life.

"Ability? Oh, you mean that piece of shit the dryad gave me? It's basically just a slight stamina buff"

A stamina ability? Okay, I'm very happy none of us considered trying to win that then, it could've proved useful in the future for when I'm ready with Petra but still. That very clearly got him smacked by the dryad Ria up on his back though.

"That's not shit! That ability has been passed through generations of dryads and is one of the strongest for keeping someone fit, healthy and active! You're just a dickhead!"

"Try hitting me again cow and I'll 'accidently' drop you"

"He-he-he, try it girly"

"Shut the fuck up you two!"

I've got to stop them now otherwise they're going to get feisty again. We're about to enter another dungeon, those two need to pick their moment if they're going to be like this. Pretty sure Petra facepalmed up on my back as well but not sure.

We all slowly fly down into the huge earthquake crack with me leading the descent and find it's deeper than any other dungeon opening we've ever come across, surprised Zeki can shut his mouth right about now, we did just enter a crack after all.

"Thinking about it, priestess would've been useful here"

I'm thinking about her light magic, we could all use fire magic to see in this darkness but it's slightly a waste of magicka and isn't nearly as bright.

"I'll sort that out Ikarus"

Petra pulls out a stick with a rag wrapped around the end of it, presumably an unlit torch from her storage ability and sets it alight, it helps a bit but it still is going to be pretty dark, it's also odd that black flame lets off light but it's magic so that's the never-ending excuse.

We must descend for a good few minutes before coming close to the ground. Once down, both Petra and Ria get of us carrier phoenixes and we precede to head into a narrow looking cave entrance. Thankfully, we can still fit through the gap even as chubby birds.

"We really are entering the 'bowels' of the earth right about now"

I knew Zeki wouldn't be able to help himself, I know there's so many rude jokes you can make right about now but that's way too easy. Still did get a small smile out of me though, I'm am still a little childish even now.

We walk through the narrow cave for a bit longer and then find it gets even narrower. It's time for a forced form change otherwise we won't fit.

(Ikarus) "Well… great, looks we can't fit. You lot will have to change form as well"

(Zeki) "Ah good, human form is always better than bird"

(Ariza) "Uh huh"

"…"

(Ria) "I'm guessing you birds have to do this a lot?"

No one gives the dryad an answer and the three of us quickly switch into human form. Once the smoke is gone, we continue onwards. I'm in my feathery human form right now, might as well use it seeing that there's no need to hide it right now.

While we're walking, Mr obnoxious can't help but notice something me and Petra are doing, we are walking alongside each other after all. Petra gave me a slight look after I changed form once again. Since she's checking me out, it made sense to hold hands, at least I think she was checking me out.

"Aww, you two must love hands or something"

He is such a sarcastic dick; we're not stopping just because he said something though. Dealing with his shit is easy enough when Petra's alongside me, hand holding is pretty brilliant after all.

It seems Ariza actually wants to defend us this time though, we don't need it but anything to shut Zeki up.

"You're still teasing those two even now!? You understand the irony Zeki? You literally are bedding that dryad!"

"We aren't a thing though, she's just a side bitch"

Of course, a fist finds the back of his head there from the pervert dryad, he always deserves to be punched and smacked if he's coming out with stuff like that. I feel like he's just ended up in a relationship he really isn't ready for, at least this dryad might feel that way.

"He-he-he, you want another punch girly?"

"Urr, calling you a side bitch is way too kind, side hoe works better"

What a stupid toxic relationship, it's funny that how much they fit each other. Insults maketh the man, apparently. I'm going to join in as well now, he is starting to get annoying after all.

"Hey Zeki, are there little dryad-phoenix hybrids on the horizon?"

"Urr, one day I will turn you into orange chicken"

He really can't take teasing back, can he? That was very much called for even through he's gritting his teeth now, don't dish it out if you can't take it back!

"Well actually, phoenixes are infertile and so are dryads as well. Surprised you didn't know that about yourself"

I did know that but I'll let that dumb dryad off. Wait, Zeki told her he's infertile? I mean, it's obvious seeing that all phoenixes are infertile but I'm surprised he even had the chance to say something while they were doing… you know what.

(Zeki) "How the hell do you know that dryad?"

Zeki didn't tell her that, how does she know then?

"He-he-he, you four aren't the first phoenixes I've come across, was a guy a very long time ago who was yellow, he's definitely dead now though"

Hang on, this dryad seems to know a bit about our species, maybe there might be some stuff hidden away that even we don't know about. This narrow cave seems to be never ending right now, we've clearly got the time to walk and talk without worry for a while.

"What do you know about us then dryad?"

Petra beats me to it; her questioning will work just as well.

"Memory isn't perfect but the guy I remember coming across was around a thousand years ago or so, he also had a similar aura to you four. Oh, he was also younger than Ikarus, think he was around twenty or so when we first met"

Does this dryad know my age? I mean, I would be twenty-five if you counted human years but it would only be technically two if it was phoenix only. That must be what she means so she's probably wrong there.

"You know I'm technically only two right dryad?"

"Are you stupid?"

"Watch it dryad, there's no trees to revive from down here"

Knew that was coming, protective Petra is always ready for action. I wonder if destroying all the trees in the world would kill the dryad but that's a very stupid idea that would never work if we also value being able to breathe.

"Erm… sorry then, what I meant to say is that you clearly don't know much about your own species if you think you're two. The phoenix body doesn't just form out of thin air, it needed the human part as the base and your soul to keep it alive, can't remember what the process is called"

Huh? Does she mean my human body was in that egg and slowly formed into phoenix? How the hell was I supposed to know that? That's got to be what she meant, if that's true than does it even count as being reincarnated then? Wouldn't that be more of a summon though?

I'll ask more in a second, I just would like to confirm something beforehand.

"Wait… so I should count my human years then?"

"Of course you do! Why else do you think your phoenix body grew so quickly? It was needed to form it; phoenixes are a lot closer to humans than you'd actually realize. I guess the best way of describing it would be evolution or evolving, like a caterpillar turning into a butterfly or something stupid like that"

Even the other three phoenixes seem a little surprised at this realization, was this supposed to be obvious to us? At least that's how this dryad is implying. I guess it's good we've learnt a little more about ourselves now, it just turns out I'm twenty-five, not two then. At least worrying about legal age with Petra wouldn't be a worry down the line, sure there's still a bit of an age gap but that was never really a issue.

Being underage was a worry but if being a phoenix is an evolution from being a human, then Petra wouldn't get in trouble, right? Well, it should be fine, this body is physically of an adult and my mind is of a twenty-five-year-old even if I might have the odd childish tendency but then again, I have grown up a lot recently.

Just look at Zeki for example, he acts childish as hell and look at what's just happened between him and the dryad. The couple, Mr obnoxious and Mrs disgusting, they really are a perfect match…

Zeki definitely looks a little annoyed now though, I don't think he likes being compared to a human but he's let it slide.

This still doesn't answer how the hell we were even summoned into a freaking egg, maybe she might know more if we keep asking. It does answer why we were able to keep our memories though, that makes sense seeing that we technically would still have the same brain. Wait, did our brains physically evolve as well? Ah forget, more important questions right now, trying to figure out if I'm technically bird brained or stupid is a pointless matter.

"That still doesn't explain why we were reborn and taken away from our planet though"

Once again, Petra beat me to it again. All of us phoenixes definitely want to hear her answer to that.

"I don't have all the answers, that dead phoenix I knew was always pretty secretive about most things anyway, most of what I know was from somebody else. If you want any type of random answer, assume the Gods got bored and decided to just create you for fun, they normally do stupid things like that"

I hate that type of answer, us four were summoned and created just for the sake of a Gods boredom? If that's the answer we get if we ever speak to one, I'm going to go mad. Oh, a worse answer would be if we ask and they respond with the whole 'you're not intelligent enough to understand our motivations' type of thing. If they do that as well, the advice that mad God gave me will prove useful. I'll kill them all if our story ending ends up being that shit…

Unfortunately, we ask a few more questions but that dryad doesn't seem to know all that much as I might've thought, it's still a little weird how she knows that a phoenix evolves from a human but maybe because she's a spirit she has her ways? Forget it, I'm done questioning her now.

Eventually, we get to the end of this narrow cave and come across a closed door with a sign on top of it. Since I and Petra were leading, she takes the torch she's holding in her spare hand and puts it closer to the sign so we can read what's etched into it.

(Petra) "Beware the green denizens that dwell beyond unless you wish to receive a powerful blessing. I give thee this warning; this dungeon is not for the weak-willed adventurer"

Okay, this is definitely the right place, green denizens can only be one thing as well, right?

(Zeki) "Oh, so we're fighting against those little green bastards then. I'm going to enjoy this"

(Ria) "There's nothing wrong with the colour green Zeki but goblins can be nasty at times"

(Ariza) "I'll try to help out but killing loads of goblins doesn't sound that fun"

Judging from their reactions, I'm guessing this might be considered a goblin stronghold? At least that's what I remember being told about aggressive goblins before, they are usually passive unless you enter their home, it would make sense considering we would be trespassers in their homes after all. If it's to help with my cure, then fuck it, let's commit some mass murder!

'I wonder how many are going to be here'

Me and Petra open up the door together and are very shocked at the scene we come across.

(Ikarus) "Bloody hell!"

(Petra) "Wow"

A cavern spreading across miles sits ahead of us from the ledge we've stepped out onto to, the natural lighting from the slight cracks of the celling of this place give it a little bit of light but what makes it breathtaking is how beautiful it looks. This might be the first cave we've come across that looks like a wallpaper or something you'd use as a background, it's that gorgeous.

It'll never compare to the beauty of the woman I'm holding hands with but there is something else me and Petra haven't noticed just yet since we were admiring the rest of this cavern.

(Zeki) "Fuck me, have we just come across Mordor or something? I know goblins are different than orcs but damn, that's a lot of green shit"

(Ariza) "Uh huh"

(Ria) "This must be a breeding ground"

Down on the floor of this cavern are obviously goblins, loads and loads of them. Not just a handful or a few dozen, we're talking about thousands and thousands of green little bastards. And there does appear to be something else as well.

'This might take a while…'