A new way to look at things.

After hearing that Shi-Woon was at the infirmary again, I decided to at least visit him and see how things were going.

On the way, I saw the encounter between Chun-Woo and the healer chick. For the first time, I've seen this guy slightly pissed, and it's terrifying. Until now he has been a pretty chill dude, but I guess he isn't in a good mood today. the most terrifying thing at least for me is that he didn't release any aura or ki, just a simple look was enough to make the nurse shit her pants.

He basically ignored me and walked away, probably to smoke or something. Entering the infirmary I look at the now awoke Shi-Woon.

"Dude... You need to stop going to hospitals, that gotta be and to your health no matter how you look at it."(Jin).

"Ah, Jin. Well... it was an accident?"(Shi-Woon).

"Falling down the stairs is an accident. You literally had a heart attack."(Jin).

"Well. I need to show my resolve."(Shi-Woon).

"And jumping off a bridge wasn't enough?"(Jin).

"I really need this..."(Shi-Woon).

"I am not saying you don't do it... Just remember what I said to you previously..."(Jin).

"Try to be smart about it?"(Shi-Woon).

"Yeah, it will literally save your life."(Jin).

"Well boys. The talk is pretty good and all, but I would like to talk with mister Shi-Woon alone please?"(Lee Shi-Ho).

"Yeah, sure. Take care of him, and don't let him kill himself with his craziness."(Jin).

"You can rest assured!"(Lee Shi-Ho).

"Ok. Bye, see you."(Jin).

I went back to the class and sat on my chair, everything was great until the project of human being decided to bother me.

"So what did you do to me muscle boy?"(Chang-Ho).

"I punched you."(Jin).

"Stop fucking lying you bastard or I..."(Chang-Ho).

"Or what?"(Jin).

I simply glared at him, if I was a normal person this glare would be as effective as a calming breeze. But not only was I a beginner cultivator, but I also had a [Sharingan], the fabled eyes of samsara. And when a [Sharingan] glares at you even through the lens of sunglasses, you couldn't help but feel a chill on your spine, and instinctive fear of what lies on those red orbs.

At that moment Chang-Ho felt a primal fear for the first time in his life, his mind sort of short-circuited and he didn't know how to act. So he simply went silent and sat on his chair contemplating the meaning of his existence. The class of course didn't miss what had happened, but for those that haven't been glared at by a [Sharingan], they wouldn't know what he felt.

And apparently, Shi-Woon saw this situation, and a look at his eyes told me all I need to know. He exited the class and returned to doing laps around the field. *Sigh* That was literally the reason for him being in the infirmary in the first place, but I guess his resolve is simply too strong for him to give up.

This made me think... Do I have such strong resolve? Could I sincerely say I would wager my life on a fight, or on a simple challenge like Shi-Woon is doing? Could I kill someone even if they are innocent for my own Objective?

I... Don't know... No, I need to steel my resolve. I literally entered a world of cultivation where people would kill each other for simple herbs and techniques, much less protect their life. I need to be prepared to kill or be killed, my mother needs me and I need to have this resolve. The resolve to do it...

I don't know if I could kill someone innocent... I don't know if I have it within me... No, I need to steel myself, there is no half-assing this decision. Do or do not, there is no middle ground.

I feel am kinda pathetic in these moments, for someone that made a massacre not too long ago. But that was a little bit easier to deal with, they were my "enemies" after all. So even if I still have some trauma left, it was mostly due to how bloody it was.

I have to be certain that the moment I starting tangling myself with this world, that I will kill and have high chances of being killed, the resolve to both kill and die for your objective. That is what I need.

And who would've thought that a boy with a weak body that is doing 50 laps around the field even with a clear risk for his life would spark such a change in my resolve? What level is my spirit right now? Am I one step closer to a Goomoonryong level spirit? I don't know, and I guess only time would be able to tell. In the end, no matter what you say to yourself or to those around you, Actions will always speak louder than words.

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That day I went home feeling a little bit more pensive. I couldn't help but reflect on my own words and choices, that old game of keep second-guessing myself. Sigh, better concentrate on cultivating now that I am home. Don't want all that pep talk I did to myself to go to waste just because I was simply too weak and my actions didn't matter.

Reaching home and doing my things. I prepared to start cultivating tonight, but before I could start circulating the [Black Heaven and Earth Technique] I couldn't help but think of my emotions, how I dealt with them, my immediate reactions. I guess [Sharingan] wielders really do feel emotions more intensely from normal. It's difficult to explain, but it likes my emotions are more vivid, intense.

But I guess it's better to focus on my cultivation right now. Talking about cultivation I think I need to find some Martial Skills, soon I will start the [Second Step] and start being able to use martial skills. I guess I can copy some at the school if I wait a bit and I am in the right place. Thus I started cycling the [Black Heaven and Earth Technique] and begun cultivating for the night.

Waking up from another meditative session I was feeling a little bit better, more revigorated than the day before. I guess I was emotionally tired with everything that transpired on my mind. But the night just concentrated on cultivating and meditating sure helped me a lot.

And now that I am with a more clear head I am able to think a bit more cleary, liking it or not the massacre messed with me, and seeing as I feel emotions more strongly and vividly thanks to my [Sharingan] it was not a surprise I've been feeling the effects for a long time.

But something that has been bothering me and only now I had a mind clear enough to think about was about the massacre, replay some more details that I let slip due to my emotional distress and other things. Thankfully I had everything engraved with the [Sharingan] so I doubt I will forget anything about it.

Replaying everything I didn't discover anything new on it, but there was still something bugging me that I couldn't put my finger on... Ah, the authorities, no matter how I look at it the media would jump at the prospects of reporting something like that, so why the hell I didn't see it in any Tv or newspapers until now?

Did someone cover it up for me? If yes, then who? I don't have any kind of contacts that can do things like cleaning all those bodies. And I don't believe for a second someone didn't discover it during all these days, liking it or not a body smells a lot so I doubt it hasn't been discovered...