Thinking about her father, and all his words and desires to learn Leon's secret, she couldn't help but feel disheartened,
As much as she wanted to stay away from him to keep him safe from the danger of her father, she still couldn't help but think,
'What if I suddenly do not see him?'
'What if he gets killed during a dangerous adventure?'
Countless (ifs) clouded her mind as she tried to think of a way to convince herself to make a move on Leon.
She knew, that she would regret it for the rest of her life if she missed this chance. She wanted nothing more than to open up her feelings for him and tell him how much she loved him.
As for his harem, as much as she wanted him for herself alone, she knew that if she doesn't' accept his harem then it means that she doesn't love or accept him either, there is no two ways about it.