Five: Zahra

Everything seemed to go quiet after Roan's statement. I blinked up at him and shook my head. It couldn't be true. Sure, he looked exactly like my father, but that meant nothing. I am and always have been an only child. He's wrong. He doesn't even know my name! He thinks it's some made up word that only he remembers. I know my name! I know my name!

"Zahra!"

"My name is not Zahra!" I hissed and stood. I moved around the log and paced. Tobyn stood and slowly came over, making me stop by putting his hands on my shoulders. I looked up at him and felt lost. "My name is Zoe! I think I know my own name! I think I would know if I had a brother!"

"Hush," he whispered and embraced me. "Take a minute and think. Think about what you've heard and what you've seen. Put your emotions aside and use your head. You can do it."

"I know my name!" I say again.

Tobyn chuckles. "I will continue to call you Zoe. If that's what your name is, then that is what I will call you."

I pull back and gaze at Roan. He seemed so desperate to tell me everything and he was right. I didn't believe him. But I would know if I had a brother, wouldn't I? He said he was there when I was born, which means if my guessing was correct, he was only a few years old. It just seemed so unbelievable.

"Tobyn!" Flint called and pointed behind us. I turned and saw a dozen or so men with weapons coming at us. They were mean looking and some had pointed teeth. But they came. There was one towards the back of the group that wasn't so bad looking. He had blonde hair and was atop a horse clad in armor. His eyes caught mine and narrowed.

The next thing I know, Tobyn is carrying me to his shelter and setting me on the bed. "Stay here!" he says softly. "Do not leave this shelter for whatever reason. I don't care who knocks. I'm locking the door and boarding the window. I want you to curl up on the bed and cover your ears. I'll be back."

"I don't want to be alone!" I cry.

He kisses my forehead and nods. "I know. But I must help fight. You are vulnerable and I don't want you hurt."

"I don't want you to go!"

"I must." He goes to the window and starts pounding in a board and other pieces of wood. "If I don't return by nightfall, there is a knife under the bed. Saw the strips of wood binding the door to the wall and slip away. Run as fast as you can." He comes back to me and cups my face with both hands. "Just promise me one thing?"

I nod, tears falling steadily.

He wipes them away and leans closer. "Remember these words I am about to speak. A promise now broken is best not spoken."

I let the tears go freely now and nod. He kisses me gently on the nose then my brow. I wrap my arms around his neck and hold on tight for one long minute. "Please come back!"

"I will," he whispers, then pulls away and walks out the door. I hear him pounding against it, securing it so nothing could get in. Then, nothing. I was alone.

I heard nothing. There was no sign of fighting and I wondered what was going on or where everyone was. Did everyone die? Did Tobyn die? Were the enemies dead? It was a long time that I paced the shelter. It was a long time that I lied on the bed with my eyes on the door. It was a long time that I sat up on the bed, knees pulled up to my chest with my arms around them.

Finally, I heard voices and sprang to my feet. I pressed my ear to the door and heard a male and a female voice. I knew the latter was June. With that knowledge, I suspected the male was Roan. Disappointed, I slipped back to the bed and sat down. After a few minutes, they broke down the door and came in.

"We have to go," Roan said softly.

"Where is Tobyn?" I ask, keeping the fear from my voice.

"He asked us to get you out of here," June explained.

My brows furrowed in confusion. "Why? How do I know you're not lying to me?"

Roan knelt in front of me and took my hands. The look in his eyes was unreadable, but I thought I saw a hint of desperation there. "He wants you safe just like I do. I want to get you away from here. I don't want to see you hurt by these people."

"Who are they?"

"There's no time to explain, Zoe. We need to go before one of them finds out you're in here," June says and reaches a hand out to me. "Come with us. We will keep you safe."

"What about Tobyn?" I say, looking from one to the other.

"He'll be fine. It's you we are worried about," Roan responds. "Come with us, please?"

My instincts were telling me to stay, but something about the way Roan was looking at me told me he'd drag me out if he had to. Reluctantly, I nod and stand up. He lets go of one hand and leads me out of the shelter, June right behind us. Instead of going ahead, but slip behind the shelter and towards a horse hidden in the forest. I wasn't as excited to see that I would be riding as I was earlier.

Roan lifts me up and I grab onto the reins as he climbs behind me. Juniper has disappeared and I search for her only to see trees. "Where is June?"

"She's getting her horse and meeting us at the village." He grabs the reins from me and spurs the horse into a fast run. I lean back against him, feeling sad and lonely once again. I keep Tobyn's promise in my mind as we continue to ride into darkness.

"Zahra, wake up."

I open my eyes, realizing I fell asleep. I saw light ahead and came alert. Behind me, Roan wrapped an arm around me, thinking I'd fall, but I felt steady on the horse. The closer we got, the more I saw. Shelters, fires, and people. So many people in one spot! It was overwhelming. I began to tremble.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

I shake my head. "I can't go there!"

"Why not?"

"Roan, take me back! Please, this is too much!" I beg and grip his arms.

He stopped the horse and got off, then helped me off. He made me look at him and then frowned. "You're scared?"

"I want to go back," I say weakly.

"We're not meeting anyone, just going to my shelter and going to sleep. I'm not going to make you meet anyone." Roan cups my face and I almost feel comforted. Almost. "i am just taking you to my shelter. In the morning, we'll go somewhere to be alone and no one will bother us."

"Don't make me go in there."

His brows furrow before he envelopes me in his arms. "You truly don't want to stay in my shelter?"

"I just don't want to go in there," I say against his chest.

"How do you feel about somewhere only I know the location of? Somewhere that is secluded?"

I nod and he grabs the reins to the horse and leads me away from the little village. We walked a long time and I didn't notice we were climbing a rocky hill until I looked down and felt my stomach drop. I backed away from the edge and into Roan. He puts an arm around me and keeps me close until we enter a cave. I look around and find it's got enough supplies to last a long time.

"Stay here and I'll get a fire started," he said and left my side. I stood there with my arms around me, shivering slightly and watched him. He gathered wood and some dried leaves, then began working. A f ire was blazing in no time.

Roan glances at me and I walk over and sit down. He grabs a blanket and puts it over my shoulders. I nod my thanks and stare at the fire as he moves around.

"Here." I look up and see him holding out some fruit and a slab of meat.

"What is it?" I ask, the first words I've spoken since leaving the village.

"Venison." I furrow my brows. "Deer."

I point to the fruit. "What are those?"

"Raspberries and blueberries."

My interest peaks at the raspberries and I take the food. The blueberries were delicious as well and I ate every bite he handed me. I was again disappointed when there was nothing left in my hands to eat. Sighing and still hungry, I curl up and try to stop thinking about the past.

"Zahra?"

"Zoe."

Roan is silent for a minute then says, "Zoe, what's wrong?"

I blink at him and feel my heart crumble. "I'm lonely and scared."

He thinks about my statement and puts his food down. I glance at it a moment then return my attention back to him. He moves closer and holds something out to me. "This was mother's. She would want you to have it."

I took the object. It was shells on a piece of leather of many colors and shapes. It was beautiful but didn't make me feel any better. "What is it?"

Roan went behind me and grabbed the object. "It's a necklace. You wear it and you can take it off whenever you want."

I look down and see the necklace hanging against my chest, the shells smooth and bright. I look to Roan. "Why are you giving this to me?"

"You said you were lonely. I thought maybe having something of mother would make you feel less lonely," he says and starts eating again. "I really do want to help you, not harm you."

"Why did he not tell me about you?"

Roan shakes his head. "I don't know, Zoe. I haven't been able to come around you since mother died. He wouldn't let me. And I didn't know he changed your name until we officially met."

"Was my name really Zahra?" He nods. "Are you really my brother? Is that why you look like him?"

He leans towards me. "I may look like him, Zoe, but I'm not father. And yes, I'm your brother. I helped name you."

My eyes widen and I feel torn between my own beliefs and what he was telling me. "What if he comes back?"

"Who?"

"Father?"

Roan slumps. But then looks at me with curious eyes. "He left you first, Zahra...I mean Zoe."

I smile. "It's okay. I like Zahra better anyways."

He returns the gesture before saying, "He left you first. He abandoned you without any way of getting food or defending yourself. You do not have to go with him. You don't have to listen to him. You're an adult now."

I nod and it gives me an idea, gives me hope. "Does that mean I can make my own decisions?"

He nods slowly. "But before you need to learn to hunt and use a weapon before we do anything else."

"Okay," I say and make a plan in my head.