Chapter 11

I wake to the comforting smell of my childhood home. Reality and heartache sets in the more I wake. Before I realize it, my pillow is wet from my tears.

I will get this out now so my babies don't see it later.

After I've cried for what felt like hours, I go looking for my babies. I know Mia needs to nurse. Unless mama used her freezer stash. Either way, I need to see my babies.

I hear laughter coming from the living room. I smile knowing my parents are having the best time with my babies.

I join them and get Mia from her walker. Mama told me she did use some of the freezer stash so I could rest as long as I needed. Mia just coos at me and my chest tightens.

Just the thought of my kids being around whoever he's cheating with makes me insane with emotions. Trenton is a great dad so I'll never keep them from Him but I can't stomach my kids being around a two cent home wrecking whore.

Breathe in and out. You have to keep it together.

I sit on the couch by mama and just watch my babies play. I should probably turn my phone on and see if I have any messages. It's after 7pm now so I'm sure Trenton has made it home to an empty house.

I see the apple on my phone loading to turn on. Then a string of chimes.

15 new messages from Trenton😍

1 new message from Home Inspector

Well, I think he realized we aren't home...

I open the message from Tristen first because it's probably not as stressful as the ones from Trenton.

All clear.

I didn't respond.

I tell mama I need to go get a bath and she grabs Mia. I head to the bathroom and turn on the hot water and add a little cold. 

I grab my phone and open the messages from Trenton.

Where are you?

Where are my kids?

Why aren't you answering?

Hello?

Bex?!

Let me know y'all are okay!

Where the fuck are y'all?

Your parents aren't answering.

Did you run to your parents?

Why did you leave?

Will you just fucking answer me?

Fucking answer me.

Fine Bex.

I'm coming to your parents.

We will discuss this when I get there.

FUCK!

I hurry and get out the tub and get dressed in super speedy time. I run into the living room to see Trenton sitting on the couch with Mia in his arms and Trish and Lizzie beside him.

Fuck. I should have checked my phone sooner.

I slowly walk in the living room and ask mama and daddy to take the babies to a different room so Trenton and I may speak.

After the babies and my parents are out of the room I look to Trenton.

"Let's speak outside. I don't anyone hearing what we discuss." I tell him while walking out the the porch.

I take a seat and look in the hiding spot daddy has by the table. Yes!

I grab a cigarette from the pack and the lighter. I light it and take a long drag and sigh.

"Why did you leave? You didn't even Anyang on my texts or calls." He says

I blanket stare at him. He thinks I'm stupid or something. We've been here before.

"You're on vacation this week but you've been leaving for work and not coming home til after work time. You said you've texted an old friend. Then proceeded to act weird and not tell my bye. We've been here before. Oh! Yes, let's not forget that your location is off." I say while smoking

He looks like a deer caught in headlights. He starts to speak then stops. Like a fish opening and closing his mouth.

"Yeah, that's what I thought." I say

He has tears running down his face but still can't speak.

Only sorry he was caught.

"Did you think you could keep it from me forever? I mean, we've been here before. More than once. But I truly did think you had changed. That's my fault for giving you another chance." I admit

"I don't know what to say, Bex." He says

"I should have told you before anything started. I should have been honest with you. I was just so scared you'd take my kids from me. Like you did tonight. " he says accusingly

Wait.

"I took the kids because I was HOME with them and you were no where to be found. I found out my HUSBAND has been being unfaithful again and couldn't stand to be in the home WE shared any longer. Our kids will always come first to me.

I figured they could stay with me this week while you're on "vacation" and then you could get them this weekend. If you want to. But, I will not make them go with you. And to be clear, they will NOT be around whatever whore you drug you this time!" I say getting louder at the end

He looks so caught. He should. Because I will not tolerate this bullshit any longer.

"I'm so sorry, Bex but I do love her. It's a lot and you wouldn't understand. I mean, I'm mot saying you don't understand love. Just you don't understand what's it's like with me and her. I am so sorry I hurt you again. I do love you but we've been over for a while and you have to have known that. We were like roommates." He says

Damn. That fucking hurts.

"So, let me get this straight. I have given up my career to stay home and raise OUR children and take care of our home. But you looked at me as a roommate? Sure, sure. But then that's not enough. You go and get in a relationship and what? Do you have kids with her? But fuck me, right?" I say bitterly

" No, Bex. That's not what I meant. And yes, we're in a relationship. I know it's hard. I am so sorry I put you through this again. But I do love her. I should have been honest with you from the get go. I should have gotten somewhere else for me to stay but I just, I didn't. I'm sorry." He says

"But there is something you do need to know and it's going to be hard to hear. I just, I do t want you finding out from someone else." He says looking me warily before continuing

"She's pregnant. It's mine." He just spits it out

My chest literally just exploded. I notice my face is wet. I've been crying this whole time.

"She's my soulmate Bex. I am so fucking sorry it happened this way. Fuck, I am so sorry." He says trying to come over by me

"No, do not come any closer to me. You know, I've forgiven you for a lot. But this, I'll never forgive." I say as I light another cigarette

"You need to go tell the kids goodnight and that you'll see them this weekend. She is not allowed around them until I meet her. And if you treat my kids any differently than your new baby, you won't see them again." I say firmly

"I love our kids Bex. It has nothing to do with them.." he says as he's walking inside to tell them bye

Damn. I knew but didn't think it was this deep. He's having a baby with someone else. Not just anyone, apparently his soulmate as he put it. Fuck this hurts. I take another drag from the cigarette and breathe out shakily. How do I go on like this? Will it get better?

Trenton walks back out and glances at me.

"I'm am truly sorry Bex. I never meant for any of this to happen but the bond is so strong. I mean, our relationship is strong." He says as he walks to his truck and leaves.

Once he's gone I let out full sobbing. My marriage is done. My husband is having a baby with another woman. My kids have no clue.

Fuck. How are we going to tell them or do we just pretend everything is okay and the go see him on weekends and me during the week? Maybe they'll just go along with it.

I go to light another cigarette and it was taken from my mouth.

I look up and see Tristen.