11. Project Loud House

Project Loud House

It was an early weekend morning at the Loud House, and inside we see little Laney waking up to another peaceful day. Though there wasn't anything peaceful living in a house with 10 sisters & 1 boy.

[Loud music as playing outside waking Laney up]

Laney: Hm?..

She then climbs out of her bunk, and left her room to see Lola and Lana fighting over a dollar, Luna jamming on her guitar, and Lincoln trying to sort out the whole mess.

Laney: (Thoughts) Not a bad morning so far...

Lucy: [right next to her sister] Good morning Laney.

Laney: [startled] Yah! Good morning, Lucy.

Lucy: For my new poem, I need a word that rhymes with "choose".

Laney: Um. How about "lose"?

Lucy: That works. [writes it down] Nice scar by the way.

Laney: Scar? What scar?

Lucy: The one on your neck.

Laney: On my... [places her hand on her neck and then she gasped in shock, realizing that she was missing one thing] My scarf!

Laney dashed back inside her room and went through her box. She scoured through the many things from her many hobby attempts. Her paints, her tutu, her microphone, but no scarf!

Laney: Oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no!

She runs outside to the hallway hoping to find her scarf, she first finds Leni walking into the bathroom.

Laney: Uhm... Leni?

Leni: Oh, hey Laney. Where did you get that sca- [Laney covers Leni's mouth before she could finish her sentence]

Laney: Please don't tell mom and dad. I just want to know did you know where my scarf is? Since you're into fashion and all.

Leni: Oh, I have tons of scarves! I've got blue ones, striped ones, velvet ones. That one's a winner for fall clothing.

Laney: No, mine's red.

Leni: Hmm... I don't know. It's definitely not your color...

[Laney ignored that last part and continued]

Laney: Okay. Well, when was the last time you saw me with my scarf on?

Leni: Um. You were waking up...

Laney: That was just now! I meant what happened last night!

Leni: Oh, well, you were in the bathroom..

Laney dashed into the bathroom where she met up with Lucy again.

[Opens the door to see Lucy and jumped]

Lucy: A word that rhymes with "stuck"?

Laney: Luck?

Lucy: Thanks.

[She continues into the bathroom to search for her scarf]

Lincoln: Laney! Where are you? You're gonna miss breakfast!

Laney: Be right down! Uh...

She looks around for something to wrap around her neck, the closest she can find was the toilet paper. So she used it to cover her neck and then made her way downstairs. Meanwhile, Lincoln was still determined to get all of her sisters out of the house in order to keep his school project in one piece.

Lincoln: Cooking is usually Dad's territory, but I gave him the day off 'cause I have to kick things into high gear. [begins serving certain eggs to certain sisters] Egg whites for Leni, sunny-side up for Luna, funny-side up for Luan...

Luan: Great yolk! [laughs]

Lincoln: ...scrambled for Lynn, fried for Lisa, deviled eggs for the twins, and...

Lori: [still on the phone with Bobby] Oh, and I picked out the perfect tux for you to wear, Bobby.

Lincoln: [growing more irritated] ...hard boiled for Lori. [serves some runny eggs on Lily's high chair] Extra goo goo gooey for Lily. [serving some rather burned eggs to Lucy] And for Lucy, extra well done.

Lucy: If I had a heart, it would be swelling right now.

Just then, Laney entered with a nervous grin.

Laney: Hey Lincoln!

Lincoln: Uh, Laney? Why do you have toilet paper around your neck?

Laney: Uhm... Thought I tried a new look?

Lincoln: Using toilet paper?

Laney: Ohhh! I can't do this! I lost my scarf and I can't leave home without it!

Lincoln: [thoughts] This isn't good! I need to get all of my sisters out in time. Maybe it's time started helping her, if it will get things moving! [talks] Okay! Uh let's try looking in the living room.

So Lincoln and Laney went to find her scarf in the living room. They searched by the bookshelf where Laney's books are. Lincoln then sees something red caught on folds of the couch. But before he could say anything, he was interrupted by another problem.

Leni: [suddenly with a light blue skin pigmentation] AAAHH! I'M BLUE! MY SKIN'S TURNED BLUE!

Lisa: Technically, it's a shallow shade of cerulean, but why split hairs?

[Lincoln dashed over]

Lincoln: Lisa, what did you do?

Lisa: I secretly switched Leni's blemish cream for an experimental skin pigmentation ointment I've been working on.

[Leni starts shaking with worry]

Lincoln: Why would you do that?

Lisa: Because she wouldn't let me try it on her if I had asked.

Lincoln: You go upstairs right now and get something to fix it!

Lisa: Fine. Hairless apes: one, science: zero. [heads upstairs]

Laney: Lincoln! What's going on?

Lincoln: Just a little issue. Hey, have you looked in the couch?

So Laney did tried the couches and to her surprise, she found something red caught in one of the cushions. She pulled and pulled until it revealed to be her scarf! When she finally pulled it out, she fell down. With Lincoln looking at her.

Laney: Uhh. Hey Lincoln.

Lincoln: What's with the scar?

Laney: [points at the diorama] What's that?

Lincoln: Oh, it's just something I made for a school project.

Laney: [looks at the project] Well, considering you using our family as your project you're a shoo in for an A.

Lincoln: [sighs] It's been a long morning for the both of us. Let's go.

But just as Lincoln was finally able to get the whole family out of the house. He ran into one small transportation problem...

Lori: [angry at Bobby] Fine! If you don't wanna wear the tux, then I don't wanna go to the dance! In fact...I DON'T EVEN WANNA GO TO SCHOOL! [screams in frustration]

Lincoln: So close... [puts his project down] Wait! [stops everyone from going back to their rooms] No no no. Everyone, stay right where you are. [heads up stairs] Lori, wait! You're the only one who can drive us!

Lori: GET MOM TO DRIVE YOU! [shuts herself in her room]

Lincoln: But she's already left! [groans] Can't something go my way for once?

Luna: You can't always get what you want, bro.

Laney: Sorry...

Lucy: [right behind him again] Lincoln, I've finished my poem. It's called "Failure".

Lincoln: [too down to be startled by her lurking] Lucy, I really don't have time for-

Lucy: [Reads]

Failure. It is not an option,

yet it's something you choose.

The man with the plan is destined to lose.

[Lily comes walking by naked]

Lincoln: LILY! Where are your clothes? And where's your diaper? [gives chase]

Lily: I go poo-poo! [laughs]

[Lincoln steps in something nasty]

Lincoln: [nauseated] I found the diaper... [changes his shoes into a fresh pair after that]

Lucy: [still reading] Failure. You know there is no one else to blame. For the choices you make are always the same.

Lincoln: [knocking on Lori's door] Come on, Lori! Please? I have my report this morning!

Lori: [refusing to come out] GO AWAY!

[Downstairs, the twins are arguing over different kinds of sandwiches in their lunches]

Lola: The peanut butter sandwich is mine!

Lana: No, the jelly sandwich is yours!

Lola: No!

[Lincoln groans in frustration]

Lola: You like the peanut butter and I like the jelly!

Lana: You like peanut butter and I like jelly!

Lola: No, I like jelly and you-

[Lincoln takes their sandwiches]

Twins: Hey!

[Lincoln makes it so that both sandwiches have peanut butter AND jelly on them]

Lincoln: Now you each have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Now, get to the car.

Twins: Thanks, Lincoln! [head to the car]

Lisa: [with a first aid ointment] Here's the antidote.

Lincoln: Thank you! [suspicious] Wait a second... [tests it on Walt who suddenly blows up like a blimp and finds out that Lisa was about to trick him] The real antidote?

Lisa: Fine. Hairless apes: two, science: zero. [hands him the actual antidote and goes to the car]

Lincoln: [hands it to Leni] Here.

[Leni sighs with relief and goes to use it]

Lucy: [still reading]

Failure. It's all your fault,

this streak of bad luck.

No escape from this cycle in which you are stuck.

Lincoln: Stop! I've got a poem for you now. It's called "Lucy".

Dark as night,

hair like tar.

Take your spooky self to the car.

Lucy: Sigh. Once again, your poetic brilliance has put me to shame. [heads to the car]

Lynn: Think fast! [comes rolling through the hall and crashes into Lincoln, knocking him down to his underwear]

Lincoln: Ow...

Lynn: Where is my field hockey stick? I have roller derby today!

Lincoln: There's no field hockey sticks in roller derby! [spins her around and launches her to the car]

Lynn: The way I play, there is! [crashes into her seat] Ow!

Leni: Finally. I look perfect and beautiful again.

[Just as she's about to get in, Lincoln shields her with the umbrella because Luan was at it again]

Luan: Oh, come on! I thought we were pails! [laughs]Get it? Get it?

Lincoln: How am I gonna deal with Lori? [gets an idea] Got it! [calls her up using the family phone]

Lori: Hello?

Lincoln: [falsetto] Hey, babe. It's your boyfriend, Bobby. I just wanted to say that I'm...I'm sorry and that I will wear any tux you want.

Lori: [gasps and squeals with delight, having fallen for it] Oh, Bobby! [laughs with joy and comes out of her room as Lincoln hangs up and is now in a good mood] Would you hurry up, Lincoln? It's always such a hassle getting you out of the door in the morning. [picks Lily up and heads to the car]

[Lincoln smiles knowing everything's back on track and grabs his project; however, he sees Luna is getting some help putting her amps into the van]

Lincoln: What's all this?

Luna: It's my gear, dude. I have rehearsal.

Lincoln: And who's that?

Luna: This is my roadie, Chunk.

[Chunk tips his hat to Lincoln]

Lincoln: No no no. He was not part of the plan. You, out! I'll take care of this.

[Chunk walks away upset]

Luna: Thanks, bro! [gets in the car]

[Lincoln gets Luna's gear into the trunk and heads to the shotgun seat, but he left his project right on the driveway]

Lincoln: Operation complete! And with ten minutes to spare. A Loud House first, I might add. Let's roll!

[Lori starts up the car and is about to roll out, but realization hits Lincoln]

Lincoln: STOP!

[Lori stops the car and Lincoln rushes out in a panic; thankfully, his project is safe]

Lincoln: [picks it up] Phew. That was close. [slips on one of Lynn's skates and trips, his project flying in the air; in slow-motion] NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

[Too late; his project hits the ground and is ultimately ruined]

Lincoln: [lamenting] All of this work for nothing...how could I be so stupid?! How? How? How?

Laney: [taps Lincoln's shoulder] Um, since you helped me find my scarf, maybe I can help with your project.

Lincoln: How?

[Laney pointed at all her sisters]

Lynn: 12 heads are better than 1.

Luan: Try not to lose yours. [laughs]

Luna: Yeah. Every little thing is gonna be alright.

Lincoln: [hopeful] Really? You'll help?

Lola and Lana: It's what families do.

Lincoln: But I'm supposed to give this report in ten minutes and this thing is destroyed. What can you guys do?

Although Lincoln has lost all hope, his sisters smile confidently with an idea. And so with that, Lincoln was finally able to make a perfect school report, with the help of his sisters of course.

Lincoln: In conclusion, in my family, every day is a challenge. But you can be sure that when I need them, my sisters will always be there for me. All of them.

[It is revealed that his sisters are all standing perfectly still and replicating his project]

Lincoln: And sure, life in the Loud House can be summed up in one word: chaos. But I love that chaos. And I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Mrs. Johnson: [applauding Lincoln's performance] That was a fantastic report, Lincoln. I'm giving you an A. [gets drenched by one of Luan's buckets] Aaahh! [Lincoln gasps] Make that an A-minus.

[Everyone except Luan is speechless to see Mrs. Johnson's expense]

Luan: [triumphant] Pailed it! [laughs]