102. Tripped! (Part 1)

Tripped! (Part 1)

[In Rita and Lynn Sr.'s bedroom, the family is counting all of their money in the family jug of change. Lynn Sr. is tossing in coins as his family counts.]

Loud Family: 1,797, 1,798, 1,799... 1,800!

Lynn Sr.: There it is, gang! 1,800 smackeroonies in the savings jug! And you know what that means?

Loud Family: [Singing while dancing in a conga line that carries throughout the house.] We're going on vacation! We're going on vacation! We're going on vacation!

Lincoln: [To the viewers, while the rest of the family continues conga-ing.] This is a big moment for the Louds. We're finally taking a real family vacation! Not an overnight at Aunt Ruth's, or a campout in the church parking lot. A vacation vacation! But getting here wasn't easy.

[Flashback to Lana on the lemonade stand, and Lola standing on the barrel box.]

Lincoln: [narrating] In a family this big, a vacation costs a lot of money.

Lola: [on a megaphone] Line up for lemonade!

Lincoln: [narrating] So we all had to do our part.

Woman: [walks by] Oh, no thank you.

Lola: [goes after her] I said... [on the megaphone again] ...line, up, for, LEMONADE!

Woman: [runs back, scared] I'll take 5.

[She holds up her money and Lana makes 5 cups of lemonade. Lana and Lola put their contribution into the jug. Another flashback shows Luna playing her guitar while people walk by and put money in her guitar case.]

Luna: [singing] So many places I wanna go, but I'd never get anywhere, without some dough

Mr. Grouse: Hey, Loud! I'll pay ya just to stop making that horrible racket!

Luna: [puts her guitar away] Whatever works, dude. Vacation, all I ever wanted.

[Luna puts her contribution into the jug. Another flashback. Laney is in the backyard selling her artwork]

Man: I've never seen such a bold and vibrant art piece! So many colors What do you call it?

Laney: Uh... "Going on Vacation"? I didn't have time to make up a name.

Man: Who cares! I'll take it! [The man gives Laney a wad of cash]

[Laney puts her contribution into the jug. Another flashback. At the IT offices, there's a line of food trucks. Lori is shown to be in a food truck named "Rock Taco", taking orders.]

Lori: Got it. Dad, I need 3 more Lynn-sagnas. Two with extra sauce.

[Lynn Sr. is shown to be in the kitchen, making the orders. However, he's pretty packed up.]

Lynn Sr.: [overworked] Honey, please discourage special orders. I'm backed up in here.

[Lori and Lynn Sr. dump their contribution into the jug, Lynn Sr. notices something.]

Lynn Sr.: Oops. That was a mushroom.

[Another flashback. It's 8:31 PM at Rita's dentist and Rita is working on the woman from the lemonade stand's teeth. She gets tired and falls asleep.]

Woman: Hey! [wakes Rita up with a water tool.]

Rita: [wakes up] Oh, sorry. I've been working a lot of overtime lately.

[Rita puts her contribution in the jug. She notices something.]

Rita: Whoops. That was a molar.

[Another flashback shows Leni running a fashion advice stand and is giving advice to Jancey Yates.]

Leni: Cinch that with a belt.

[Jancey puts a coin in Leni's cup, and walks away, while the woman from the lemonade stand, and the dentist office walks up.]

Leni: Live on the edge with a polka-dot skirt.

[She puts a coin in Leni's cup and walks away.]

Leni: [clearly disgusted by her next customer.] Ugh, no, no. What did I tell you about wearing sock with sandals?

[It's revealed that the customer is Mr. Grouse, who's wearing red shorts, and socks with sandals.]

Mr. Grouse: [sighs as he puts a bunch of coins in Leni's cup.] Oh, only if they're colorful or ironic.

[Leni puts her contribution in the jug. Another flashback shows Lynn on a snowy, winter day knocking on someone's door carrying a snow shovel. An old woman answers it.]

Lynn: All done, Mrs. Parker [It reveals that Lynn shoveled Mrs. Parker's walkway and the walkway next to it.] I also do furniture moving and jar opening. Keep it in mind.

Mrs. Parker: Oh, it's my lucky day. I dropped a jar of pickles under the sofa.

[Lynn puts her contribution in the jug. Another flashback shows Luan entertaining at a child's birthday party as a clown. She rolls up her sleeves and pulls out a penny from behind a boy's ear, then another one, then several more after that and the children cheer. She later puts her contribution in the jug out of her ear. Another flashback shows Lucy serving a funeral with four little kids in a bathroom.]

Lucy: Dearly beloved, we gather today to say goodbye to Dorothy. She lived life to the fullest, whether she was swimming around in her castle, blowing bubbles, or eating rocks. Turns out that last part wasn't the best idea. [flushes Dorothy down the toilet and hands a little girl a tissue.]

Little Girl: Thank you. That was a beautiful service. [gives Lucy a sack of cash]

[Lucy puts her contribution in the jug. Another flashback shows Lincoln delivering newspapers, he throws one and it hits the top of a car, which triggers the alarm to go off. He throws another one and it scares a cat, who dives into the bushes, and crashes through a window. Lincoln puts his contribution in the jug, and then realizes his pockets are empty. Another flashback shows Lily as a DJ and Lisa breakdancing at the Royal Woods Mall. Scoots comes by and tosses a few coins.]

Scoots: Slay all day, girl! Woo!

[Lisa and Lily put their contribution in the jug. End of flashbacks as it cuts back to outside the Loud House.]

Lincoln: Thanks to all our hard work, we saved enough money for a week at the Weeping Willow Resort Lodge on Lake Michigan. We're talking bumper boats, horseback riding, and 26 flavors of fudge. [catches up with his family who are still doing the conga.]

Loud Family: We're going on vacation! We're going on vacation! We're going-

Mr. Grouse: [offscreen] Hey, Louds! I'll pay you again to knock off that racket!

Lynn: We already have enough money.

Luna: [nudges Lynn] Hello, road snacks?

[Cuts to the next day; Lynn Sr. putting suitcases on top of Vanzilla.]

Rita: [Walking out with her things] Let's see, work's taken care of, Mr. Grouse is keeping an eye on the house, Clyde and the McBrides are taking care of Walt, Geo, Charles, Cliff, and Squeals.

Lynn Sr.: [singing] Just a few more things and we'll all be relaxing in the...

[He and Rita head inside, while the siblings, minus Lisa and Lily, come outside with their luggage, Lucy is dragging a coffin.]

Lola: [To Lucy] Why are you bringing that on vacation?

Lucy: You have your sunblock, I have mine.

[Laney is seen hauling a huge backpack]

Lincoln: Woah, Laney. You don't have to pack everything. What's in that backpack anyway?

Laney: Just some stuff just in case we run into some trouble on the way to the resort.

Lincoln: Relax, Laney. We're just going on vacation. What can possibly go wrong?

Laney: [To the viewers] Has he even been watching this show?

Lynn Sr.: [coming back out with another bag] Whoa, guys, this is too much stuff! Something's gotta go back!

Luna: [Kicks Lynn Sr.'s bag] How 'bout this humungo bag?

Lynn Sr.: Absolutely not! That one's very important!

[The bag opens up to reveal a bunch of jigsaw puzzles.]

Lola: Puzzles?

Lynn Sr.: The bag stays! Laney, why don't you take your backpack back?

Laney: Trust me, dad. It will come in handy unlike all of your jigsaw puzzles!

[The kids start complaining just as Lisa walks out and whistles to get them to stop.]

Lisa: Enough! Stand back and let me work.

[Cuts to later, showing that Lisa has found a space for every piece of luggage in/on Vanzilla. The family, minus Lily, is impressed.]

Lucy: [to Lisa] How did you do that?

Lisa: Quite simple, really. I merely used a formula combining elements of spatial analysis, and the basic physics theorem stating that for every object- [realizes her family minus Laney has gotten in Vanzilla; deadpanned.] Don't ask if you don't really want to know.

Laney: I wanted to know...

Lynn Sr.: [from inside] Sorry kiddo, we should get a move-on. According to the reviews, the hotel has very strict check-in policy. If we're not there by 8:00, they could give away our rooms!

Lana: [Just as Lynn Sr. starts the car.] WAIT! [Opens the door and whistles. In Lola and Lana's room, Hops, El Diablo and Bitey hear and head out through the doggy door. As they enter Vanzilla, El Diablo and Bitey go under the seat, while Hops jumps into Lana's pocket. She closes the door.]

Lynn Sr.: Okay, here we go. Loud Vacation time! Can I get a 'What what?'

Loud Family: [as the the car pulls out of the driveway.] What what?

Rita: WAIT! [Lynn Sr. stops the car as she gets out.] I forgot Lily's diapers. [goes back inside and comes out looking sheepish.] Turns out I also forgot Lily. [reveals she has Lily, who looks annoyed.]

Lily: [annoyed as Rita puts her in her seat.] Poo-Poo!

[Lynn Sr. starts the car and the family heads off.]

Loud Family: [singing] We're going on vacation! We're going on vacation!

[The Louds exit Franklin Avenue and head up to the Royal Woods Parkway.]

[Later on the road, an old style horn honks and shows to be a red truck with a farmer driving in it right behind the Louds.]

Lynn: Don't let that old geezer pass us, Dad! Floor it!

Lynn Sr.: Well, it's- It is floored! [the truck passes them] It's been floored the whole time! [mumbling] Dang show off in his hot rod.

Laney: Dad, don't be rude. I'm sure he didn't mean to drive pass us.

Lynn Sr.: Are you kidding me? He saw the opportunity and just passed us through!

[The Louds finally make it up the hill.]

Lynn: Look! [It shows that the truck is already going down.] Come on, Dad! Let's get our dignity back!

Lynn Sr.: I'm right there with ya, LJ.

[Vanzilla starts overtaking the truck, as Lynn starts shouting "pass".]

Lisa: Father, this is not advisable! Factoring in the angle of our decent, current wind speed, and the condition of this aging heap. I fear we are going to wind up-

[Before she can finish her sentence, Lynn Sr. loses control of Vanzilla and crashes into a fence. The family is outside, having already survived the crash by leaping out of Vanzilla.]

Lisa: -Nose-first in a ditch.

[The bumper to Vanzilla falls off.]

Lynn Sr.: [gasps and hugs Vanzilla, while crying.] My baby! What have I done?!

Laney: I knew something like this would happen. Nothing good ever comes from trying to one-up someone.

Lori: I know how that feels...

Lana: Stand back and let me work.

[Cuts to later, showing that Lana has gotten Vanzilla out of the ditch and repaired it.]

Rita: [impressed] Wow! Nice job, sweetie. How did you do that?

Lana: Eh, it was no biggie. There was a crack in the cylinder block, so I just re-routed the exhaust manifold pass the carburetor, and then- [realizes her family minus Laney has gotten in Vanzilla; deadpanned.] Don't ask if you don't really want to know.

Laney: I wanted to know.

[Lynn Sr. is about to start the car, when suddenly...]

Rita: Wait! [Gets out and gets Lily, who looks annoyed and gets back in Vanzilla.] Okay, now we can go.

[The red truck passes by them.]

Lynn and Lynn Sr.: Dang it.

[Later, the Louds are still driving and the weather starts to get a little heated out there.]

Leni: Oh, it's so hot. Dad, can you turn on the AC before my hair totally frizzes?

[Lynn Sr. presses the button to the AC, which seems to be fluttering and then stops working. He presses the button twice after that.]

Lynn Sr.: Huh. Doesn't seem to be working.

Lana: Ugh, the coolant must've leaked when we crashed. [pulls out her toolbox] Pull over, Pops. I'll check it out.

Lynn Sr.: No can do. Remember, 8:00 check in.

Leni: Well, can someone just roll down a window?

Lynn Sr.: Sorry, honey, but if we roll any of these windows down, they're not coming back up.

Rita: I know it's hot, but just pretend you're at the beach.

Leni: In this? Ugh, no!

[Laney is seen with a tiny fan in her seat]

Lola: How come you're not sweating?

Laney: I packed a tiny fan before we went on our vacation. Told you my backpack will come in handy.

Lana: Well, do you think you can share that fan action with us?

Laney: Sure thing! [Just as Laney shares her fan with the twins, the batteries die turning off the fan] Oh...

Lola: I don't suppose you have an extra set of batteries in that backpack of yours, do you?

Laney: Unfortunately, that was the one thing I didn't pack...

[The siblings see Lori snacking on some bean chips.]

Lori: Anyone want a low-cal bean chip?

Lucy: Vomit.

Laney: No thank you...

Lori: They're delicious. And supes high fiber. [Farts]

Laney: [Plugs her nose] Too high in fiber if you ask me...

Lori: It was the seat! See?

[Gas scent comes out of Lori's seat.]

Siblings, except Lori: [Groan in disgust]

Lori: Now it's not doing it.

[The gas scent goes all over Vanzilla. Lincoln and Lucy groan in disgust.]

Luan: Suffocating!

Lola: [Coughs] Ack.

Lynn Sr.: Be strong, kids! No windows! [Gas scent goes into the front seat] Oh, it's in my mouth!

[Lynn Sr. opens up the windows and everyone exhaled deeply, except Lori, who blushes in embarrassment. Eventually, the wind blowing inside the van like a jet turbine is becoming a problem.]

Lynn Sr.: This is better!

Rita: What?! [Lets go of the map and it lands in Lynn Sr.'s face. He screams in panic, and so does the family as they swerve off the road and crash into a section of porta-potties, which topple over like dominoes, and one of the doors to Vanzilla falls off.]

Lynn Sr.: [taking a few deep breaths.] Is everyone okay?

Person: [In one of the porta-potties.] I've been better!

[Lynn Sr. looks concerned as Lana jumps out and examines the broken door.]

Lana: The good news is, the crash made the windows go back up. The bad news is, now we have no door. No way I can re-attach this baby. [looks up] But I may have a solution.

[Cuts to later, showing that Lana has used Lucy's coffin as a serviceable door.]

Luan: Nice fix, but we still have a grave situation! [laughs] Get it? [realizes her family has gotten in Vanzilla; frustrated.] What? Don't set me up if you don't wanna hear a joke!

Laney: This time, I didn't want to hear that.

[As Luan gets in, Lynn Sr. starts Vanzilla, when suddenly...]

Rita: Wait! [reveals that Lily is on top of Vanzilla, looking annoyed. Rita reaches her arms out and gets her down.]

Lily: [annoyed] Ah!

Laney: You really need to keep track of your kids.

[The family gets back on the road.]

Rita: Who's ready for lunch?

Siblings: Me! Me! Me! Me!

Rita: Honey, let's start looking for a good picnic spot.

Lynn Sr.: No time! We're behind schedule. We'll have to eat in the car.

Lynn: [Finds sandwiches inside a basket.] I got this. Sammies coming your way. Think fast. [throws them to her other siblings.]

Lola: [Gets hit by a sandwich] Watch it! [Eats sandwich]

Lori: [Gets hit by a sandwich] Ow! [Eats sandwich]

Luna: [Gets hit by a sandwich] Not so hard, dude. [Eats sandwich]

Lincoln: [Misses sandwich] I can't catch.

[Laney hands Lincoln her sandwich]

Laney: Here, Lincoln. You can have mine.

Lincoln: You don't want yours, Laney.

Laney: No, it's smells weird.

Lincoln: Hey. You can't be picky when on the road.

[The kids minus Laney and parents have finished eating their sandwiches. Rita crumbles up her wrapper.]

Rita: Those egg salad sandwiches were delicious, honey. Thanks for making them.

Leni: You're totes welcome, Mom.

Lynn: Trash back here [Luan, Lisa and Lincoln try to throw the wrappers in the bag.]

Luan: Whoops.

Lisa: Sorry.

Lincoln: I can't throw, either.

Lynn: [Gives him a thumbs down] Weak.

[Luna's stomach growls. Her face turns green and starts to feel nauseous. She takes her headphones off.]

Luna: Whoa, guys, are you feeling alright? I'm not feeling too good myself.

[The other siblings get nauseous as well, except Leni, Laney, and Lily.]

Lori: Leni, what exactly did you put in those sandwiches?

Leni: I can't remember. I made them weeks ago.

Lincoln: Leni!

Lucy: What?

Luan: That can't be good.

Leni: Well, I was so excited for the trip, I wanted to get a head start!

Laney: You know you could've just done that yesterday.

Leni: A good traveller always prepares early. You of all people should know that.

Siblings (Minus Laney): [Groaning]

Lincoln: Uh-oh. I think I'm gonna barf!

Lisa: I second that!

Luna: Puke fest!

Laney: Don't worry guys, I have some ginger ale in here somewhere.

Lola: No time! Pull over, Dad!

Lynn Sr.: No time! Use a bag!

Rita: Lynn!

Lynn Sr.: Ok, ok!

[Lynn Sr. stops the van on the gas station. The Loud Family minus Laney starts puking in the bathrooms and outside the bathrooms. Cut back to The Loud Family in the van.]

Lori: Leni, you're off lunch duty until further notice.

Lisa: Yeah, let's just round that up to 'forever'.

Laney: You know, guys. I have some chips in my backpack if anyone wants some.

Lynn Sr.: No thank you! We all had enough snacks, dear.

[The family leaves the gas station as a car carrier passes them in the opposite direction. They notice the farmer from earlier have a flat-tire on his truck.]

Lynn: Ha, ha! Check out Farmer Speedy! Not doing much passing now, are you?

Laney: Lynn! That's not very nice to say that! He probably has somewhere to be too.

Rita: Laney's right, dear. [to Lynn Sr.] Honey, we should help him.

Lynn Sr.: [sighs] Okay. But only if it takes less than ten minutes!

[Lynn Sr. stops the van and the family gets out. He also failed to notice that he accidentally kicked the gear shift into reverse and Vanzilla starts rolling backwards, unnoticed by the Louds.]

Lana: Need a hand with that flat, buddy?

Farmer: Oh, that'd be swell. The spare is buried under all these crates. [takes out a crate]

Lana: [takes the crate] Not a problem. Louds, assemble!

[The family gathers around Lana and she gives the crate to Lincoln. Lana jumps into the back and the siblings are passing the crates around and putting them in a pile while the parents are having a conversation with the farmer. Meanwhile, Vanzilla seems to have roll backward onto the car carrier, which has parked on the gas station. Hops, El Diablo, and Bitey pop up; Back with the Louds...]

Lana: Last one! [gives the last crate to Lisa. She grabs the spare tire, hops out the truck, and gets out a scissor jack to position where the tire should go.] Huh, I haven't worked one of these babies before. [to the farmer] 1920?

Farmer: '21.

Lana: 12 banger?

Farmer: 16.

Lana: Ha, ha. Nice.

[Meanwhile, the car carrier driver comes out the restrooms and gets in as the horn blares. Back with the Louds, Lana has finished putting the spare tire on while the rest of the siblings finish putting all the crates back onto the truck.]

Lana: There. This should get you where you need to go. But keep it under 50. [puts her wrench back in her toolbox.]

Farmer: [tips his hat] Much obliged for all your help, folks. Wish I could repay you in a bigger way, but... [gives a crate to Lynn Sr.] ...how about you take some of my cherries for the road.

[The twins grab a couple cherries and taste them.]

Lola: [gasps] These are delicious!

Farmer: It's all about using the right manure.

Lola: [notices what the farmer meant and spits them out.] Blegh!

Lana: [Likes them] Yes. I'm picking up some...horse notes.

Laney: [Eating the cherries] These are very good, Mr. Farmer. Mind if i take some?

Farmer: Sure. Take as much as you want. [Laney puts a few cherries in a sandwich bag as the farmer heads into his truck] You have a nice day now. [drives off as the family waves goodbye.]

Lynn Sr.: Okay, gang. Let's get back on the road.

[The family notice that Vanzilla is not there.]

Rita: [gasps] Where's Vanzilla?!

[Rita's question has been answered when they see Vanzilla on the car carrier and is driving off past them. The family screams in horror and run off after the car carrier.]

Lynn Sr.: Ah, you can't take my girl!

[The family is shouting at the driver to stop.]

Luan: No! That's our car!

Lincoln: [To the viewers] Well, there goes our vacation.