10. A Tale of Two Tables

A Tale of Two Tables

You may think a kiddie table can only be seen during the holidays, but with the Loud Family it's a part of everyday life. Tonight at the kids table, Laney thought she tried her hand at cooking. She made some cupcakes for dessert. She loved to spend dinner with her young siblings, especially her big brother Lincoln.

[Laney walks to the table with a tray of cupcakes, she smiles as she sees her sisters playing with their food]

Lana: Did you say peas? (jokingly flings peas at Lincoln)

[Lincoln blocks Lana's peas with his plate, causing them to bounce off and onto Lisa, which Lola laughs at her]

Lisa: Oh, you wanna play? Let's play... [brings out a tiny catapult and launches mashed potatoes only to hit Lincoln instead of Lana, much to Lana's surprise] My calibration seems to have been off by about sixteen degrees.

[Lana hits Lisa with her wiener]

Lana: Mine wasn't.

[Laney was wiping the mashed potatoes off Lincoln, Lisa noticed the tray and grabs one of Laney's cupcakes and catipulted it at Lana]

Laney: I'm so glad you liked them. I made them myself.

Lisa: It made excellent ammo for my catapult.

Lana: [licks the cupcake off her face] And delicious ammo. Hey, pass me that tray. [Laney gives the tray of cupcakes to Lana, which she uses to throw at Lisa. As they continued their food fight, Laney was talking to Lincoln]

Lincoln: How are you not annoyed by this? [gets hit by a cupcake] It's a mess over here!

Laney: Well, what do you expect. We're kids, Lincoln. We love making messes, playing with our food. You know, fun.

Lincoln: [sighs] Maybe for you, but I wish I can sit somewhere more civilized. [Laney notices Lincoln looking at the grownup table]

Laney: The grown up table? But Lincoln, you're not an adult.

Lincoln: I can dream can't I?

The boy then imagined himself at the grownup table, where everyone is dressed in fancy attire and the decor is exquisite.

Lincoln: So, I said to the Prime Minister, "Two breads are better than one!"

[everyone laughs at his joke]

Luan: Your comedy is so mature. Just like you.

[everyone raises their glasses to propose a toast to Lincoln]

Lori: To Lincoln! He puts the 'grownup' in 'grownup table'!

Everybody: To Lincoln!

[Lincoln blows kisses to them all only for the food fight to come and ruin his fantasy]

Lincoln: That's it! I don't belong here! I'm gonna go ask to join the grownup table!

Lola: Ha!

Lana: Good luck.

Lucy: You really think they're gonna let you?

Lily, Lisa, Lola, and Lana: Oooooooh!

[Lincoln suddenly imagines everyone at the grownup table laughing at his request to join them which causes his younger sisters to laugh as well]

Lincoln: You'll see. I'm gonna make it to the grownup table and leave all you children behind. [gets hit by mashed potatoes again]

Lincoln marches off to his room and Laney thought about what he just said.

Laney: Leave all us children behind?

Lucy: Don't worry Laney, I doubt that he will be accepted into the grown up table. He just doesn't know what it's like being a grown up.

Laney: What is it like being a grown up?

Lucy: I've seen what goes on over there. They just sit there, talking about boring stuff.

Lana: Never telling a single joke.

Lisa: They never know the true joys of a simple food fight.

Lucy: But most importantly, they stop having fun.

Laney's thoughts grew worrysome.

Laney: You don't think Lincoln will be like that, w-when he's at the grown up table do you?

Lucy: We all have to grow up someday Laney. Until then, you have nothing to worry about. [gets pelted by a cupcake by Lily, they continued their food fight]

That night Laney was still a bit worried about the whole grown up situation. She went up to her bed.

Laney: Now, I know Lincoln too well to know he's not gonna really turn into a boring adult. Perhaps I'm jumping to conclusions a bit too early. I'm sure this will blow over by tomorrow...

The next day Laney went down to the kitchen to get some breakfast, but as she got there she saw Lincoln drinking... coffee?

Lincoln: Good morning, everybody! Ah, nothing like that first cup of morning joe. [smells it] Ah, mountain grown. [takes a sip but then spits it out disliking the taste. The coffee was spat all over his sisters who aren't too happy about that]

Laney: Uhm... Lincoln? Are you okay?

Lincoln: Why never better little sister.

Lincoln walks away, leaving Laney confused. Later she went to get a book to read at the living room, where she happened to spot Lincoln with a newspaper in his hands.

Lincoln: Hey, guys. There's a really interesting article in here about how kids are maturing faster these days. They say 11 is the new 15.

[Lori and Leni take a quick glance at Lincoln and go back to what they were doing; Lincoln then turns on the TV to a White House press conference]

Lincoln: Ooh, the House is debating the new highways bill. This should be fascinating.

Laney begins to worry about her big brother. Could this mean he's becoming a stuffy, boring adult like Lucy said?

Laney: [gulps] Um.. Are you sure you're okay Lincoln. You're not acting like yourself.

Lincoln: Don't be ridiculous! I'm as normal as I can be. Though the back's a little stiff. Getting older ain't easy. Am I right, ladies?

Lori and Leni look at each other, shrug, and return to their tasks. But Laney was starting to fear of what's become of Lincoln. Later at dinner, Laney was at the kiddie table and she was sad to see that Lincoln was sitting at a different table.

Lisa: Something troubling you Laney?

Laney: [sighs] It's just that, Lincoln used to sit here.

Lana: Ah, leave em! He's with them now! With the boring grown ups.

Laney: Well, it was Lincoln's dream to be with a more sophisticated crowd. I should be happy for him, but I... can't.

Lola: Bah! He's probably having the time of his life.

But meanwhile at the other table, things turned boring for Lincoln. It was just quiet conversations and nothing else.

Rita: So, Lynn, how did you do on your math test today?

Lynn: Good, Mom. I think I really nailed those integers.

Lynn Sr.: So, Lori, I heard Bobby's dad had a hernia operation. How'd that go?

Lori: Um...okay, I guess.

Lincoln: [trying to beat the boredom] Hey! I heard a funny joke today.

Luan: We don't tell jokes at the grownup table.

Luna: Or sing, brah.

[Lincoln now feels even more bored after what he was just told and hears his younger sisters over by the kiddie table having fun]

Lisa, Lola, Lana, and Lucy: Beans, beans, the musical fruit! The more you eat, the more you-

Lana then makes fart noises with her armpit and they all have a good laugh, Laney couldn't help but smile. Lincoln slightly chuckles at their antics.

Lynn Sr.: Something funny, Lincoln?

Lincoln: Not at this table.

Laney continued to look at Lincoln from her table, and she still had an unsure feeling. That night, Laney was in her bed thinking about Lincoln.

Laney:[talks to herself] I should be happy for him, he finally got to sit at the grown up table like he wanted. But what about him turning to a grown up, I don't want to lose him. [sighs] Well, tomorrow's another day...[goes to sleep]

The very next night, Laney and Lincoln were walking to their seperate tables and while they were walking, Laney started a conversation with the boy.

Laney: Uh, Lincoln?

Lincoln: Yes Laney?

Laney: I know you wanted to be at the grown up table and be with the other sophiticated siblings but, and I'm not saying you shoud give this up, but perhaps you can stay ato our table one last time? It just isn't really a dinner without you...

Lincoln: [in a trance] But I can't Laney. I'm an adult now!

The room suddenly gets darker, then bars formed at the entrance to the dining room. Lincoln started to shift further away from Laney.

Laney: Lincoln!

She started to back away from this horror, then a fridge popped from the ground and opened up with Lucy inside.

Lucy: We all gotta grow up someday Laney...

Laney reviled in horror then a bunch of hands grabbed her.

Luan: Why don't you join us Laney...

They all pulled her into a dark inside from under the grown up table.

Laney: No! Please! I don't wanna be a grown up! I'm still a kid!

She was pulled deeper into the dark void until she woke up in her bed, revealing it was all a nightmare. But even if it was just a nightmare, she still couldn't do anything about Lincoln's new spot at the adult table.

That evening at dinner...

Laney: [sighs sadly]

Lana: Hey, you gonna eat that? [Laney pushes her plate to Lana]

Lola: Okay! You've been acting all sad for two nights. What's going on?

Laney: I just don't think i can get used to Lincoln being at a different table...

Lola: You're still griping about that? He's just eating somewhere else now. And besides, shouldn't happy for him?

Laney: That's what I thought. But then I realized if Lincoln did become a grown up, he wouldn't play with me anymore...

Lola: But he's not a grown up! He's like us! Kids who like get messy, make noise, start food fights! You know, fun!

Laney: I can't see the point if I can't have fun with the only brother I have...

They all looked at Laney for a moment.

Lana: Talk about dramatic...

Just then, Lana was pelted with mashed potatoes. It revealed the person who threw it was Lincoln!

Lincoln: Room for one more?

Laney: Lincoln! [went up to hug her brother] But I thought you were at the grown up table.

Lincoln: Turns out I wasn't fit for that table after all.

Laney: So you're not going to be a boring adult?

Lincoln: Actually, I'll have to grow up someday. Who told I'm gonna be boring? [Laney pointed at Lucy, Lincoln sighs] Look Lanes, I don't have to be a boring grown up. We have the opportunity to be anyone we want, have awesome jobs or be famous celebrities.

Laney: Wow. I never thought of it that way. I was too busy worrying about you leaving us.

Lincoln: Don't worry Laney. Because I know where I want to be. [sits down] So, what did I miss? Let's...ketchup! [squirts ketchup at his younger sisters; laughs and gets hit by potatoes three times]

And so Lincoln was glad to be back at the kiddie table. Just then Lynn popped in.

Lynn: Hey...can I join you guys?

Lincoln: Sure. The more, the merrier.

Lynn: [sitting down next to her younger brother] Oh. I never knew it was possible to make it out of the grownup table.

Soon more of Lincoln's sisters came in for a seat. Guess they weren't keen about the grown up table either.

Lori: Psst! Can we join, too?

Much to the joy of the younger siblings, they too are happy to be at the kiddie table as they pull in chairs and sit down altogether. Excited, all the Loud kids engage in a big food fight, altogether at the kiddie table laughing with joy.

Lynn Sr.:Finally, a little peace and quiet.

Rita: Did you say peas? [flings peas at her husband]

[they both laugh as they too enjoy these kinds of shenanigans]