Chapter 23 - Animal Instincts Vs. Love

Selena's POV:

“Eric! Stop! Let go!” We battle on who wins. He says nothing. No word since he’s got in. Just using his strength against mine on this.

He can’t see me naked! Lord! No! If he did all that with me dressed up, I don’t want to know what he does with me like this! I’m fucked! No!

The beast grabs one of my hands and I instinctively let go of the door.

Stupid me!

I try getting his hand away from mine. He takes me with my back on the shower’s wall, the one without glass, and him on me, staring into my eyes, water pouring over us. He glues himself to my naked, wet body.

I’m fucked! God! Help me! I already feel raped only from this! Jesus Christ!

“Eric! What are you doing?! This isn’t normal! I’m fucking naked! Please! Get a grip over your judgment and stop your animal instincts! For God’s sakes! Will you?!” I’m trembling and I feel like a prostitute.

I attempt in pushing him, but water gets into my eyes. I close them without thinking and turn my head aside to avoid it. He takes my head with one hand and he kisses me by force. He raises me in the air and puts me around his waist. I have never felt so exposed in my entire life. So weak. I pull his hair and try to take him away from me. It’s a dangerous situation. I don’t want any of this. I have no feeling for him. My body is against his actions, my mind is Hiroshima, my heart is thumping like I mounted on Himalayan mountains in a second. From all this inside of me I might die right now. I can’t take this shit anymore. Not after yesterday and today.

I manage to take my mouth away from his.

“Eric! One second! Please! Listen to me! One second! Just one second!”

He says nothing but devours the exposed side of my neck.

I pull his hair to stop. Failed.

“Eric! Will you listen to me?! You’re raping me right now!”

His body is so heated up that even the water feels cold. Thank God he has his pants on!

“Eric! If you truly need me submitted to you in front of those people, you stop right now! If you do this to me, I’ll be next World War against you, and you’ll have no chance in winning in front of them! Just use your god damn intelligence for once and think!”

Please, God! Make him stop!

I’m fuming and crying. Nothing.

He comes back to my mouth, but I scream at him.

“Eric! I’m not playing you! This is me! I’m not playing hard to get! Understand that! At least give me this one week! Please! I don’t fucking know you! I can’t stand you! Do you want to kill me?! One week! That’s all I’m asking! One fucking week! Please!” I break into a hysterical crying. “Just one week. Please. Don’t. Do. This. To. Me…” I can’t look into those tsunami eyes anymore. I’m just crying in his arms in this dirty position he’s got me into.

His breath is fanning my left cheek and his forehead is touching the side of my head. He’s burning.

“Do you think I can last one week?” He doesn’t change his position.

“You said you love me. If you love me for real, you’ll last. If you want me to give you a chance on me, and gain my trust on you, you’ll do it.” I say, crying, with a labored breath, not looking at him.

“I do love you. But…” He’s having cut breaths.

“Then show me you love me. Do what I’ve asked of you. Please. You will never have me as yours like this. I’m honest. Not lying to make you crazy.”

He squeezes me into his arms.

My upper body is crashed into his chest and abdomen. I feel so dirty, so soiled right now. In my life, I ran away from men to avoid this, and he forces himself on me like this. I could die right now.

Still in same position on me.

“One condition.” He tenses up hard.

“Say.” Tears are Niagara Falls down my cheeks.

“You let me kiss you and don’t reject me. If you do that, I’ll agree. I need something to believe in you giving me a chance on you.” He cups the left side of my face with his right hand, and makes me look into a mix of tsunami, atomic bomb, storm, tornado eyes of his. His jawline is contracted, and he breathes with difficulty.”

For crying out loud! Didn’t you have enough of me?! Demon! Satan!

He sees my rejection of what he’s said, apparently. “Either that or I’ll take you into bed. Right now. You choose, baby.”

The moment I hear the bed part, a fire wave crosses my body. The fear of that makes me instantly grab his head with my hands and kiss the motherfucker.

I sense his body relax a bit while he invades me with his tongue.

God! Help me get over this! Help me! I don’t want to have sex with him! Don’t reject him, Selena! Keep it in! It’s a sacrifice you must make!

He kisses me passionately, I don’t know for how long, but when I want to retract, he tenses up on me. I stop and he ravages my mouth some more. I don’t feel anything from this. It just makes me sick. I truly feel like a hooker.

Again, I don’t know how long has this lasted. For me it’s a torture that takes hours. He lets my body down slowly, still kissing me. His hands on me are like Hell’s fire. With his every touch on me, I cringe. He breaks the kiss, keeping his forehead on mine, looking at my lips. We both have a labored breath.

“Get Out. Now.” I say between my teeth, stressing each word.

“I love you. Just in one day and a bit, I love you madly.” He keeps staring at my lips, not letting go of me.

Just in one day and a bit, I hate you for eternity!

“Get out, Eric! I gave in for one kiss! Out! Now!” I start pushing him and go feisty on him again. That’s the limit of my self-control on that.

He starts laughing and locks our eyes. Me fuming, him lustful. “And the second condition.”

He’s playing me! You motherfucker! I’ll smash you! When you go to sleep, you’re dead!

“I don’t want to hear it! You said one condition! I’m not giving in for anything else! I’ll kill you! You rapist!” I know I have a killer look at this point. The one that would take pleasure in seeing blood on his victim.

“It’s connected to first one.” He smirks.

“Jesus! I fucking hate you! Say it and let go of me!” I push his left shoulder.

“I can kiss you whenever I want. And you don’t reject me. Ever.” I would take out those playful eyes of his and rip off his devilish lips.

“NO! THAT’S FINAL! GET OUT!” I push him harder, but he takes me in the position we’ve been before.

“Then, let’s go to bed, baby.”

Are you fucking kidding me right now?! Satan!

“Fine! Fine! Put me down! You make me sick! I fucking hate you! Satan!” And he kisses me again.

Fucking fuck! Why are you punishing me, God?! What did I do to deserve this?!