1 ltr

Do you have any idea what a déjà vu is, well it's a feeling of having already experienced the present situation. I have been having this feeling of fear and déjà vu lately.

Also lately, I've been feeling this temporary confusion—often described as a "fuzzy" feeling and an uncontrollable jerking movements of my arms. But the truth is I have no idea why and I haven't told my parents yet because I believe it will pass and I don't want them getting worried again. I love my mother and she's the woman after my heart, she means so much to me and I love my dad as well, he's my crown and I want a man like him.

He loves my mum and he really stood by her in all her difficult time and most of all he respects her.

Did I tell you that I am an extra. We all know every woman gets pregnant for nine months but what if I told you that I was three months after. Yes alot of complications in the process and my mum was scared that she may never have the chance to be a mother ever again. But it's a great news don't you think.

If there's one thing I have learnt that has made me stronger is patient. And that's more reason why I won't break Raphael's head when next I see him. He just keeps interrupting with his calls.

if there's another thing that has happened to me in this life that has made me weak is the aspect of being humiliated and embarrassed. There's this guy in school he's more like the most handsome guy and yes he's attractive. I've known him like almost all my life in highschool and when I finally had the courage to express my feelings towards him, I over heard his conversation with another mate. He described me as a sadist. and he says it will be a total nightmare if he ever had to date me even if it was for a second. He said I always acted strange and my thoughts and ideas where from out of space. I was hurt and yes he was right because noone wanted to associate with me because they felt I was different but the truth is no one got to take their time to understand my kind of person first but they judge me instantly without even getting to know me well.

The one place i feel most like myself is when I get to spend time taking care of animals especially dogs.

they are really great companions and that's why I still plan on getting myself a puppy.

Sometimes my parent can be a handful. my dad would say am acting up in age which means as a teenager I was acting that way and my mom thinks I am eager to get my freedom but the truth is sometimes parent can be annoying.

They don't give you enough space and as an only child they feel you're still their tiny little toddler. And the craziest of all is they plan your outing from the dress to the foot wares and when I cannot handle them and I don't get my space the only place I get to escape to is the beach. The beach is my favourite place to be. peaceful and free like the air and water.

My dad has had the largest influence on me, and I love him so very much. if I could change one thing about myself it's the joy of being alone. I really need to work on being more open without being sarcastic about everything.

So my mates already have plans of what they want to be in future but the truth is I don't.

don't get it twisted, I love medicine and I plan to be a doctor but am sure by tomorrow I'll want to be a banker because I know how to save and next tomorrow I will be interested in interior designs because last week I planned to be an astronaut. The truth is I have been thinking of engineering.

Don't think I am crazy, I am just lucky to be gifted in every area i find myself and don't say I am confused because right now I can smell burnt cakes and I am sure if I were to be a baker I won't burn cakes. Speaking of cakes I actually left them in the oven. oh my goodness!.

Back to business. I actually assisted my aunty in baking, she stepped out to get few things and leaving me in charge I made things worse. Still not sure how to explain to her how the cake got burnt but It's not my fault i just got engrossed with my writing.

my favourite attribute about myself is the fact that I am very much out spoken and I have them beautiful smiles.

The craziest thing I have ever done is microwaving my socks and that's not it alone because I do alot of crazy stuff especially if I sleep walk. One of my childhood event that impacted me most as a person was my first walk. walking step by step. That's why In life, you take it a step at a time.

one book I am more embarrassed to read but I admit is the best is the story my mum wrote and published and it was about me as a baby. I know I did alot of funny crazy things.

The only one thing I feel my life is missing is a companion, a best friend, someone to talk to, someone to tell my secrets and plan my crazy outings with, someone who would love and respect me and won't laugh at my back.

My parents really taught me more about life.

I consider myself more of being skeptical than Being romantic.

If you ask me who I think i deserve an apology from? then it's Raphael. he never stops ringing and if I had to lose any of my five senses then it's my ears I hate the way this phone keeps ringing .

if I could find out exactly what my life is going to be like in ten years from now, I would want to know if I will still be feeling alone.