10

I saw you today.

Walking down the stairs, talking to my friend, and I saw you.

How ironic that I was talking about you then.

I wonder if you saw me?

I talk about you too much, I know, but it's damn near impossible not to.

I adore you more than words can describe.

I wish I didn't come off as so... obsessive, because I swear I'm not obsessed, it's just that I've never, well, loved someone as I do you, and I'm not sure how to deal with it.

And that's why I keep nearly everything locked up. Nearly everything real, because I'm terrified of you finding me obsessive, or you finding out I'm talking about you.

It's scary.

Sometimes, I let something real slip into the conversations I have with my friends. I open up just slightly, and they don't care, they have more important things to worry about, they think I'm being selfish always talking, I think I'm being selfish at this point.

When someone breaks down, it affects me more than I could explain. And once I feel sad, I feel like I'm being selfish.

When I hug people who don't wanna be hugged even though I desperately need a hug.

When I say something about my day and they change the topic so fast.

When I talk about you, think about you even.

I'm

Being

Selfish.

Aren't I?

.

.

Hopeless.