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I Accidentally Stole a God

In only a few dozen years, the world will be destroyed. The world's most powerful experts have made careful, calculated plans to prevent the disaster. Those who are aware of this are few, but their number certainly doesn't include Song Yi, a fifteen-year-old pickpocket living one meal to the next. When the young larcenist incidentally steals from the wrong person, the world's last defender, an ancient discarnate emperor, ends up in the wrong host body. What's worse, there's nothing he can do about it! Can the unlikely duo get along well enough to stave off their imminent demise? --------------------- Release Schedule: 7ch/week at 0:00 GMT+8

Namake · Oriental
Classificações insuficientes
22 Chs

Five on One

The woman who'd arrived to process them was named Ma Xiulan. She insisted, though, that they call her 'Big Sis.' Along their way through the Spire, many affectionate gazes were cast towards Big Sis Xiulan, and this was not lost on the group of novitiates that trailed her like ducklings.

"Listen, you guys," she said, continuing the long string of advice that she'd been giving along their journey. "You should be careful about getting in fights. Of course, sometimes violence is the solution. But at the moment you five are like toddlers."

"If we're toddlers, then what's that Li Bolin guy?" Little Li asked.

"The novitiate that Little Zhang fought?" She put a finger on the side of her cheek, thinking for a moment. "He'd be like a teenager, if I had to guess?"

"And the elders?" This time it was Zhi Yue who asked.

Her question made Big Sis Xiulan burst into laughter.

"Well, it depends on which, but at their level the analogy falls apart. The difference between them and you is like the difference between me and a newborn."

The group paled. They found that, suddenly, the image of that white-eyed man popped up in their minds. If, to him, those monstrous elders were only a hindrance, just what kind of monster was he himself?

Eventually they came to a large room within the spire that was filled with dummies, weapons, training equipment and dueling rings.

"Alright," Big Sis Xiulan said, "I'm going to do a quick test for all of your capabilities. There's no passing or failing, so there's no need to worry."

Grabbing a scroll and pen, she led them over to the dummies. They were each instructed to select a different one.

"Good. Now please, one by one, execute the art you learned during the examination."

The first to go was Zhi Yue.

She neared her dummy and clapped her hands down on either side of its head. With the impact came a low rumbling sound, but nothing else happened.

This was the first time the other four had seen Zhi Yue's attack and, while they didn't know what they expected, that certainly hadn't been it.

Big Sis Xiulan, on the other hand, nodded her head approvingly.

"Ooh, pretty good. Your mastery of the Epicenter Minor art is maybe at 10 percent," she said. When she saw the confused looks on the faces of the other four, she explained. "Look at the dummy's head closely."

Following her instructions, they looked. What they saw was the dummy's head covered with tiny cracks, looking as though it had been fractured into tiny pieces that were held together by only a few connections.

Still, for a direct hit, it didn't look too impressive.

"Alright, next."

With a confident grin, Su Bai walked up to her dummy. Slowing her breathing, she began her chain of attacks.

One after another the palm strikes sounded like thunderclaps as they struck the dummy's chest. Soon, cracking sounds could be heard. When the fiftieth strike landed, the dummy's chest caved in.

Big Sis Xiulan looked impressed. "Haaa… you actually broke the dummy… Well, your Thunderclap Palms is at least at twenty percent mastery."

Su Bai smiled as she bowed towards Big Sis.

Zhi Yue, on the other hand, looked displeased. Clearly, she didn't like being one-upped by the only other girl in the group.

"Alright, who's next?"

Little Li put some distance between himself and the dummy, rubbing his palms together.

With a high-pitched shout, he leapt forward, throwing a punch towards the dummy's head. Halfway to the target, his arm suddenly burst into flame.

Aside from Zhang Bo, everyone in the room had wide eyes as they watched. Even Ma Xiulan couldn't help the surprise showing on her face.

With a crash, the fist struck home, sending a pillar of fire shooting out from the back of the dummy's head.

When the smoke died down, the dummy's half-melted head became visible, still red from the heat.

"Kid, you…" Ma Xiulan had never seen a new novitiate master an art to this extent before. "This Wyvern's Fist is no lower than 60 percent mastery."

They all looked at Little Li in a new light. Even Zhang Bo hadn't realized how much the kid had improved since the second trial.

Little Li himself, on the other hand, wore a bashful expression as he scratched his forehead.

"About the dummy, do I… Do I need to pay for that?"

They all had a good laugh. He didn't end up having to pay.

Next was Zhang Bo.

Without waiting, he unleashed a rapid succession of punches, palm strikes and uppercuts to the dummy. After only five seconds, the barrage stopped abruptly.

Zhang Bo raised a single finger and leisurely poked the dummy in the chest.

The moment he did, there were dozens of cracking sounds, followed by the dummy collapsing into shattered pieces.

Silence reigned for a moment.

"You five really are monsters in the making, aren't you? That Ninth Elder…" Ma Xiulan chuckled. "Little Zhang, I can't tell you how much you've mastered this art, since you made it yourself. What would you like to name it?"

Zhang Bo looked at Little Li.

"Well, it was your idea. I'll let you decide."

Little Li blushed.

"Prince, I-"

"I told you, didn't I? I'm no longer a prince."

The boy relented.

"Why don't we call it Frostbite, then?"

Zhang Bo nodded.

"Frostbite it is."

The rest of the group was realizing that every time they thought they knew the extent of Little Li's abilities, they were wrong. Before, he hadn't mentioned that the fusion art was his idea, attributing it all to Zhang Bo.

Humble and highly intelligent. He may be a bit shy, but he was still young. This kid would grow into an important figure for the sect, given time. This was Ma Xiulan's adjudication, which she wrote down next to his name on her scroll.

"Alright, last one."

Finally, it was Song Yi's turn.

With a deep breath, he prepared himself to use the Blazing Desert Minor Art.

Dropping into the familiar low stance, he spun around, generating centrifugal force, when…

"Brat, just stop."

The voice came just as he was about to jump off the ground. Surprised, he lost his balance and fell flat on his face.

"Owww…"

Everyone's jaw dropped. Did this guy really pass the sect entrance examination?

Su Bai's face went beet red, and she hid behind her hands. She felt terrible for him. But at the same time, the sight of him face down, his butt sticking up awkwardly in the air… It was too funny!

She was guiltily choking back giggles when Song Yi stood back up.

"Big Sis Xiulan, may I please try again?"

Amused, Ma Xiulan nodded.

Inwardly, though, Song Yi was shouting.

"What the hell?!"

"If I let you go through with that, you would've been way more embarrassed than just now, trust me. Now, listen."

"Fine! What is it?"

"You completely misinterpreted that crappy art. The circular motions you're doing… Honestly, they make me want to puke. The "circular motion" you were meant to use is for Qi! Qi!"

"Qi?"

The monarch heaved a sigh. "Close your eyes and focus."

Song Yi did as he said.

When Song Yi closed his eyes, all he could see was the back of his eyelids. He was worried that nothing would happen.

"I said focus!"

Sog Yi tried to shut out all extraneous thoughts.

He felt an intense pain in his temples. All of a sudden his vision was swimming with squirming bright colours.

"What is this?"

"It's Qi. You want to look for a faded red-orange colour. Once you see it, focus your attention on it."

Song Yi once again did as asked, quickly picking out a colour exactly as the monarch had described.

"I found it."

"You- wait, you did? Nevermind, there's no time. Try to execute the art again this time. Now that you've made contact with Qi, even you should be able to do something," Emperor Wang said.

Song Yi walked over to the dummy. He left two meters of distance, at the monarch's bequest. "I am ready."

Nearby, a disciple with a crescent moon robe watched the testing be done.

"Hm? This time he's not doing that ridiculous spinning motion?" the disciple thought to himself.

He nodded his head. This time it seemed Song Yi was more prepared.

Song Yi closed his eyes. Filling his mind only with thoughts of that qi, he shut out all extraneous senses.

His eyes shot open.

Twisting his hips, he delivered a simple side kick, perpendicular to the ground. Given that he was short, his foot was only at about the same height as the dummy's waist.

With a controlled exhale, he placed his foot back down on the ground.

"I'm done."

Ma Xiulan coughed. Somehow a dud had slipped through this year's selection exam. Especially given the remarkable obsidian axe strapped to his waist, she had expected spectacular things from this disciple. But after two disappointments, she felt his only skill might, in fact, be luck.

She began to wrap things up. "Well then-"

"Wait!"

The crescent moon robed disciple walked over.

With a wave of his hand, the disciple suddenly turned into a middle-aged man. His grey hair dropped down nearly to the floor, and he had a wizened look in the corners of his eyes.

"Twelfth Elder!" Ma Xiulan shouted, quickly clasping her fists and bowing. "Inner Sect Disciple Ma Xiulan offers respects."

The five novitiates followed suit.

Giving them only a head nod in return, the Twelfth Elder walked until he was in arm's reach of Song Yi's dummy. Not turning to face them, he said,

"I came to witness because I wanted to see the quality of the new novitiates. Old Ninth is always bragging about his tests, so I wanted to see for myself what they produce," he paused. "I have to say, I'm impressed with you four. You truly are spectacular."

Song Yi's face remained placid.

Su Bai frowned in concern.

The other three smiled proudly.

"As for you," the elder said, turning to look at Song Yi, "For you to have a breakthrough at this critical moment is incredibly lucky."

The Elder pushed the dummy gently. The dummy's upper half fell to the ground with a thud. The bisected area was severed with such precision, it looked as though the two halves had never been connected to begin with.

"You are behind the others, but your qi control is commendable. It seems that none of you are ordinary, after all."

With a nod to Ma Xiulan, the elder took his leave.

"Don't get too excited just cause of what this doe-eyed runt says, brat. If you ask me, you're average at best."

Song Yi sighed, feeling stifled by Emperor Wang's words.

"If you were talented like that Zhang boy, I'd be out of here in no time."

Even though the monarch said as much, the Twelfth Elder hadn't lied one bit. The reason Ma Xiulan hadn't noticed that Song Yi's art had worked was simply because Song Yi's Qi had been so fine that, because she hadn't been paying close attention, she didn't notice it.

She felt guilty for underestimating him, and also embarrassed that she had made such an error in front of an elder. But she had to continue the processing.

"Alright, I'll test your fighting skill next."

By now, she was already standing on one of the elevated duelling platforms.

"All of you may come at me at the same time. Your goal is to force me off this platform. Meanwhile, you must stay on it."

The area she stood on was circular, five feet above the ground. It was about twenty meters in diameter.

"Big Sis Xiulan," Little Li asked, "With your strength, shouldn't this be an impossible task for us?"

Ma Xiulan chuckled. "Don't worry, this is a test of your abilities. There is no passing or failure. Also," clanging sounds began to ring out through the air, sounding like gates closing. "Now I'm at the same level as you guys."

If she were at the same level then, with five people, they should have no issue. At least, that's what they thought.

After the group mounted the platform, they began.

Zhi Yue attacked first, nearing Ma Xiulan and clapping her hands.

The attack didn't hit the woman, but the ringing sound of her Epicenter Minor Art was amplified many times in contrast with earlier. Before, it had been contained within the dummy's head, but now, the sound was almost deafening. Because the attack was directed at Ma Xiulan, she suffered the brunt of it, dazed for a moment.

At that moment, Su Bai closed in with her palm strikes. After landing only three, though, her wrist was grabbed by Ma Xiulan, who pulled her close before kneeing the girl in the stomach.

Before the knee strike could land, however, Song Yi sent a sharp wave of Qi using an axe kick.

This time, Ma Xiulan was paying close attention to Song Yi. As such, she was able to avoid his attack, but the terrifying wave still forced her to cancel her own, lest her leg be severed. In turn, Su Bai was able to dislodge her wrist and back up once more.

"Thanks, Big Bro Yi!"

Little Li and Zhang Bo hadn't been idle, either.

Little Li used the opportunity to charge Ma Xiulan from the front, his arm already burst into flames. Meanwhile, Zhang Bo had snuck behind her, his Frostbite prepared to land decisive blows to her pressure points.

But Ma Xiulan, in this moment of extreme danger, smiled.

"I was wondering how you two would attack," she said.

It was too late for them to change their plan, so they didn't. Despite her words, it seemed inevitable that their attacks would land.

But that didn't happen.

At the last moment, Ma Xiulan dropped into a horse stance and thrust out both hands. From her palms emerged a life-sized white stallion, which charged forward and blew Little Li away.

Immediately after, exploiting the miniscule gap in the duo's timing, she grabbed one of Zhang Bo's arms. Spinning around, she threw him flying directly out of the arena.

Zhang Bo landed on his back with a loud crash. He gulped for air, winded.

The rest of those on the platform hesitated for a moment. It was five, no, four now, against one. Yet this Big Sis of theirs seemed to hold the advantage anyways.

Ma Xiulan cracked her knuckles, beginning to stretch. "Listen up you guys, your Big Sis Xiulan has been studying in the Blue Moon Sect for fourteen years now. I turned twenty-five just this year."

She paused for them to do the math.

"Just like you all, I joined from the Ninth Elder's Examination. So, in other words…"

The stretching stopped as she looked up at them.

"You guys are gonna have to try a lot harder than that."

After her confident words, they wanted more than ever to continue. But they weren't sure how. After all, this was a genius who had joined the sect at eleven years old, being groomed ever since. Seeds of hesitation and uncertainty had been planted in their hearts, and were beginning to bloom.

Ma Xiulan had hidden her ability until the largest threat, Zhang Bo, came close, unleashing it all in one concise movement to eliminate him from the equation. The morale of the remaining four was also shot. She had completely seized the initiative.

It was Zhi Yue who broke the impasse.

"So what? Who needs a crappy prince anyway?"

Before the others could react, or form new plans, she charged forward, getting close to Ma Xiulan and quickly exchanging blows.

Suddenly, there was an opening in Ma Xiulan's guard.

Zhi Yue knew it was a trap. That was exactly what she had been hoping for.

Without hesitation, she stomped her foot on the ground and used the Epicenter Minor Art. The deafening sound once more rang through the room. But this time, it originated from the ground. Ma Xiulan's legs immediately began to shake, unstable. As a result, her already loosened guard was blown wide open.

Now! Zhi Yue delivered a brutal punch with all the strength she could muster towards the weakness.

But Ma Xiulan's face betrayed the truth. She was grinning.

Her legs stopped shaking, and her guard closed once more, trapping Zhi Yue's arm. It was only a matter of course that the full-forward force of Zhi Yue's punch was used against her, throwing her out of the ring.

"H-how?" she cried.

"Executing the Epicenter Minor Art in a novel way to try to catch me off guard, it wasn't a bad idea. But your mistake was not using it in the fight prior. I was waiting for you to use it."

"But you were affected, even if you knew it was coming…"

The one to answer Zhi Yue wasn't Ma Xiulan, but rather Little Li.

"Look at her feet," he said.

When they looked, they discovered… Ma Xiulan's feet weren't actually on the ground! Instead, there were millimetres of air beneath them, almost imperceptible. Without direct contact, the effects of the Epicenter Minor Art were drastically reduced.

There were only three remaining.

"Big Sis Xiulan, are there other tests after this?" Su Bai suddenly asked.

"Eh? More tests? No, this is the last one for now."

Su Bai and Song Yi shared a knowing glance, nodding.

"Fang Li, can you have my back?" Song Yi asked.

The boy nodded in response.

Little Li and Song Yi charged towards Ma Xiulan, beginning a series of back and forth exchanges. Occasionally, Song Yi used the Blazing Desert Minor Art, but the woman always managed to either dodge or cancel out the Qi with her own.

As for Little Li, he didn't use his Wyvern's Breath, as the time it took to use was too long in a fast-paced fight like this. Without that, though, he wasn't strong at all. In terms of physical strength, Little Li was the weakest of the entire group of five. Still, he did his best to help where he could.

But, even two on one, the number of bruises and scrapes the two boys were receiving was far higher than those they managed to inflict. After all, neither of them had trained in martial arts before the entrance examination. They didn't stand a chance from the beginning.

Song Yi patiently allowed the injuries to build up, waiting for his chance.

Just when he thought he would no longer to be able to hold out, it presented itself.

Ma Xiulan had turned her attention to Fang Li for a brief moment, and Song Yi took that opportunity to make his surprise attack.

Inspired by Zhi Yue, he attempted to use his arms instead of legs for the Blazing Desert Minor Art, and it worked. Using his arms as hilts and Qi as blades, Song Yi hacked at Ma Xiulan from two different directions.

But Ma Xiulan wasn't an Inner Sect Disciple for nothing.

Using an art to harden the flesh of her arms, she blocked both blades of Qi. Simultaneously, she kicked out at Little Li, who had opportunistically decided to strike with his Wyvern Breath for the first time.

And that was what Song Yi had been waiting for.

Letting the Qi dissipate, he charged between Ma Xiulan's opened arms and wrapped his arms around her torso in a tackle.

"Bai'er, now!" he shouted.

For the first time in the entire fight, Ma Xiulan's face dropped.

Then, Su Bai's voice could be heard.

"First Form — Salamander's Breath!"