How to Amaze Them with What You Remember About Them

Several years ago, I attended a political fund-raising event in a

Midwestern state. One guest intrigued me. Sometimes I'd see him

in animated conversation with several people. Other times, he'd

be standing alone scribbling something on a card in his hand.

Then the next time I'd look up, he'd be chatting it up with someone else. The next minute, he'd be scribbling in his hand again.

He repeated this pattern for over an hour. I became as curious as

a nosy neighbor. Who was this fellow?

At one point during the evening, I was standing alone by the

refreshment table. He came up to me with a big smile, a warm

handshake, and introduced himself. "Hi, I'm Joe Smith." He asked

me what I was drinking. I told him white wine and we started discussing preferences. I happened to mention my favorite white was

Sancerre. While we talked, I had to bite my tongue to resist asking him what he'd been up to with the feverish note taking.

A few minutes later, I spotted a friend across the room and

excused myself. He asked for my card and, as I walked away, I

peeked over my shoulder. I knew it! There he was, scribbling on

my card. That was my opening. I turned back and, trying to pass

my inquiry off as a joke, said, "Hey, I didn't give you my measurements. What's that you're writing?"

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How to Amaze Them

with What You

Remember About Them

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Copyright 2003 by Leil Lowndes. Click Here for Terms of Use.

He gave a hearty laugh at my tasteless joke and said, "You

caught me!" He turned over my card and I saw one word written

on it: Sancerre. Then, to assuage my paranoia, he emptied his

pocketful of people's business cards to show me scribbles on the

back of each. I assumed it was just Joe's little system to help him

remember people. It wasn't until months later that I saw the

method to his madness.

One morning I went to my mailbox and found a personal

postcard from Joe. He told me he was running for state senator.

Then at the bottom of the card, he'd written, "Had any good

Sancerre lately?" That won my heart. Had I lived in his state, a little touch like that might have swayed my vote to him.

They may not jump up and down asking, "How did you

remember that?" Nevertheless, they will remember you. No

matter how important the VIP, he or she senses a special kinship

286 How to Talk to Anyone

Technique #76

The Business Card Dossier

Right after you've talked to someone at a party, take

out your pen. On the back of his or her business card

write notes to remind you of the conversation: his

favorite restaurant, sport, movie, or drink; whom she

admires, where she grew up, a high school honor; or

maybe a joke he told.

In your next communication, toss off a reference to

the favorite restaurant, sport, movie, drink, hometown,

high school honor. Or reprieve the laugh over the great

joke.

08 (265-292) part eight 8/14/03 9:19 AM Page 286

with the person who refers to other than their usual well-known

accomplishments.

Politicians are constantly selling themselves. (If you've ever

wondered why America is called "The Land of Promise," just keep

your ears open in election year.) But, of course, to know what to

promise people, politicians use the next super sales technique called

"Eyeball Selling