[~89~]

Today's rain made me realize that..

I've never really accepted myself. I survived all this time just because of a motivational sentence that made me ignore all the pain I was experiencing. But now what should I do? Even motivation feels bland, I lose enthusiasm and confidence in myself. I'm broken.

Can't I go back and redo everything? I want to fix what I've broken.

To be honest, my days are getting heavier and it always makes me feel like ending everything. negative thoughts, overthinking, tired, and all sick. Can you stop for a second? I want to stop...

No one really understands me.. it feels like everything they say makes me even more annoyed and angry. Why am I like this? I'm so guilty of myself. I can't convey this pain to anyone. I feel unworthy...

The light that used to accompany me feels dim. The warmth that used to accompany me felt cold. The smile that always graced my face has disappeared since then. Then, what other reasons do I have to endure?