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Go Away I'm Watching Porn

Issei Hyoudou is the Sekiryutei. Not many people knew how powerful he is, or what he's done. And he's perfectly fine with that. He's done with people. All he wants to do is sit back, relax, and watch porn without being bothered by school or homework or devils or fallen angels or annoying conspiracies and why the hell won't they just leave him alone already! Perv OP Issei Harem.

Zero_Hand · Anime e quadrinhos
Classificações insuficientes
25 Chs

Chapter 5

"Ok. So. What have we learned when it comes to magic, ki, and any dragonic abilities you have?"

Seven year old Issei flushed and looked to the side in embarrassment as he sat on the swings of the local park. "I don't have much of magic ability, so I have to use small spells. I have more ki than normal because I have you two in me, but my control is bad and if I mess up using it I'll blow up my muscles. And because both of you are in me, any fire I make is too strong to control and will kill and or destroy everything around me so I shouldn't use it until I learn how to control myself better."

"In other words, you are too weak for some abilities, and your natural talents with the others are too potent for you to play around with." Ddraig summarized the boy's situation aptly.

"Figures. We are teaching a kid after all." Ghost reasoned, albeit with some reluctance. "Then again, I didn't think that being in here would boost his latent pyro abilities to that extreme. I've only been here for a few months at most. He shouldn't have changed that much."

"How can you not assume that? Even if you deny it, with your flames, you are without a doubt an ancestor of Dragons beyond the eras and folds of time."

Issei didn't know what was so special about Ghost's fire, but from what he could tell from the few conversations that he and Ddraig had he could figure out a few things.

First was that it didn't act like normal fire. It was like… super old fire that could wipe out everything because it could burn the stuff that made up everything everywhere forever.

Something about it being older than conceptual definition of creation and the absolute destruction of the multiverse. He didn't really understand that part much. He didn't care either since it wasn't useful for getting stronger or related to the harem.

Second was that Ghost really didn't like his fire. Enough that the man's raw and utter hatred would leak out and give the boy a headache if the latter pushed the subject too much. Even Ddraig clammed up pretty quickly after the first time he probed too far. Say what you want about creepy old man Ghost, he could be very scary when he wanted to be.

Regardless, Issei didn't have access to said flames, and the Sacred Gear that Ghost was in, the newly dubbed Blind Eternity, didn't give power over it either.

Instead, as far as fire went, Ghost being inside of him made any fire magic or breath Issei made very hot, scary… and really hard to deal with.

Ddraig had even compared the flames to his own. Issei didn't really know if that was a compliment or not, but he was going to go with yes since the red dragon was supposed to be pretty well known.

He almost got into a bit of trouble because of that last part. He couldn't make a lot yet, but it did spread pretty quickly. Thankfully the creepy girl that occasionally shows up from time to time, Ophis, was around and managed to snuff it out when he asked in a rather panicked and frantic way that only a kid his age could manage.

He had to remember to get her some good snacks the next time she came over. She didn't say much and said weird things sometimes, but she was pretty nice. Apparently she was a super old and super powerful dragon. Why she looked like she was his age he didn't know, but then again she was crazy strong and hall all kinds of abilities, so she could probably look like whatever she wanted whenever she wanted. Maybe he should start treating her like family? She does call Ghost Grandpa…

Maybe he should call her grandma? No. No grandma was that young and cute. Elder? No. Sister? No, she was supposed to be way more important than him…

… Auntie? Auntie Ophis? That sounds pretty catchy, and she doesn't look like she cares that much for formalities. She shouldn't mind too much.

"I don't know why, but I have a feeling I'm not going to like what Partner's thinking."

"Ooh. Don't tell us! Keep it a surprise!" Ghost clearly didn't have the same reservations his roommate did. For being an immortal with who knows how many years of experience, the guy was annoyingly childish most of the time.

Sometimes Issei felt like he was the most mature out of the three. He didn't like it when he did. It felt wrong.

"… Can we get back to training please?"

"Fine. Fine. So special ability wise, you still have major road blocks. Bright side is that you actually know enough to start working on the basics."

"You have a lot to work on whelp. Too much to focus on anything specifically." Ddraig pointed out. "At the very best, at this rate you'll be a jack of all trades, master of none."

"Not if he keeps up abusing your powers." Ghost argued. "His ki and base foundation will grow with just exercise, which will take the longest to get used to anyways. Magic is more focused on studying and research than actual power so long as you don't take the Devil Fallen Angel route. We can use it to help him practice control in general. And most of his dragonic abilities will come naturally as he grows up."

"So I just do the same thing I've been doing all along? Study and exercise?" Issei let his shoulders sag in depression. It was a bit of a letdown. He wanted to be able to actually do the cool things by now. Yeah he could breathe fire, but it only took one head sized fireball to completely wipe him out.

That wouldn't stop him from learning magic though. He was going to be really smart eventually, so even if he didn't have a lot of raw power, he should still be able to use it well enough.

Especially since he wanted to specialize in one branch in particular. For the harem.

"…" Ghost didn't say anything to the boy's disappointment, but he was clearly contemplating something.

"What is on your mind? Don't tell me you wish to add more to the plate. He is still just a child and needs rest to grow."

"Is something wrong Ossan?" Issei asked. It wasn't often that the man took time to think about something. He normally spoke what was on his mind regardless of what people thought or felt about it.

"… Bah. If he's only going to be focusing on the basics for the most part, he might as well learn this. The younger the better. If he has my luck, he's going to be dealing with the higher level guys sooner or later. It should help with controlling everything else too." Whatever it was the man had debated had apparently come to a conclusion. "Ok kid. Since you now know what your magic and ki feels like, you've gotten a good grasp of your internal energy and meditation. Because you have at least those down, I'm gonna teach you something special that will make you awesome in the long run to work on since you can't really do much else."

"Something awesome?" Issei brightened up instantly the way only a child could.

"Something mega awesome. The kind of awesome only super stupid strong guys like me that travel between worlds know how to use." Even if he couldn't see it, Issei could tell that the man in his right arm was smiling viciously. "The kind of thing that when you finally master and use against your enemies, they'll be like, "what the hell is that?!" And then you utterly wreck them like a badass. Maybe even walk away from an explosion without looking at it at the end."

"Why would you walk away from an explosion and not look at it? Was it not big enough?" Ddraig was completely befuddled by the last part, not seeing reason or the idea behind it.

"Explosions are never big enough!" Ghost shouted with pride. "… Unless my brother Scab is responsible for them. Then yes, they can get too big. And then I'm left footing the bill from all the damages made by said explosion because he's an asshole."

"The more I hear about them, the more I realize how high maintenance your kin are."

"I'm never going to have a positive net worth." The Sacred Gear on Issei's right arm was literally crying with tears and everything, even though it shouldn't be physically possible. "Do you guys even know what the standard rate for just a mundane Universe is?! Let alone the insurance needed to cover one?!"

"There's Universe Insurance?"

"Territory management motivates competition and responsibility. And it's something to do. You'd be surprised how bored some of the big guys upstairs can get once they develop sentience."

"I don't care about other universes! What's the super cool power you're going to teach me!?" Issei on the other hand, was already drooling as if being shown a brand new toy. "What is it?"

The small boy had been excited, with a wide grin on his face and eyes filled with stars.

"Oh right. That."

"-Ngh?!"

An instant later, the grin had stayed, but only because the boy was unable to move his body.

The world stood out more. Every outline. Every edge. Every barrier. Every definition was made distinct to an unfathomable degree. The tree was not the leaf. The stone was not the dirt. The buildings in the distance were not the individual bricks that they were comprised of.

Issei Hyoudou stood as still as the world did, as a power made all distinctions all the more apparent.

He could not move. He felt as if he was standing on the tip of a needle, with the winds of the greatest storms all about him, tempting to push him over the edge into an endless beyond deeper and darker than anything imaginable.

He shouldn't have understood what it was. He was too young and inexperienced to know and comprehend what this was… but because of the monster in his right hand, he knew… he understood…

He was in the presence of the End of All. The very point in space, time, conception, and imagination where everything existed…

… And everything was simply, not.

Paralyzed with utter terror, heart beating rapidly and eyes glued to his right hand, Issei Hyoudou finally began to understand that the man that had invaded his body was someone to be genuinely afraid of.

Ghost calmly spoke from his temporary cage, unconcerned with the effect he had on the outside world or his host. "A "God of Water" has full domain of all water based substances, from the greatest oceans to the specks of mist that make up clouds. A "God of Earth" can will a single grain of dust into your eyes, reshape continents, and know where every living thing that dwells on and below its surface is. Neither can wrest control territory from the other, for that territory is their respective domains down to their very definition. You, will be the "God of Issei Hyoudou", and you will be the master of everything that it will ever entail.

"I will teach you yourself. We call it Presence, and with it even a normal human can spit in the face of the rules that make up all worlds."

o. o. o.

It was a Thursday night and Raynare was at a local bar getting plastered.

She didn't know what was making her more miserable at the moment. Her mission, or the fact that she was never able to get a good shot at killing that brat ever since the school year started. He was surprisingly fast for a human, let alone a shut in. Not faster than her, but enough that he always managed to get into areas that had a few witnesses that she had to keep an eye out for.

"You look like shit."

"I've been told I do good impressions." Barely looking to the side, she saw a man in his late thirties in a thick coat and hat sit down next to her. "Sorry, but you're a bit old for me Donaseek."

"And you're too green for me." The Fallen chuckled, motioning to the bartender to come over. "I'll cover her tonight. I'll have whatever you think is best on tap."

"You're too kind." Raynare slurred. Come to think of it, how much did she drink? Must have been a lot considering she was pretty damn buzzed. Mystical existences like her had a higher tolerance than humans, and due to her work she had plenty of experience drinking others under the table."

"And I'm not stupid enough to believe you actually think that." Her comrade chuckled with an amused smirk. "I am curious as to what has you so agitated that you would put yourself in your current stupor though."

"Shit job. Fucking babysitting. Driving me nuts." She didn't even have the motivation to lift her head off the bar counter.

"Babysitting?" The man scoffed. "I was told that you were put on it by Lord Azazel himself. Half a year ago you were practically shoving the very fact into as many faces as you could before leaving."

"He's an important baby. Supposedly." Raynare rolled her eyes, knowing that he was prying for information. "All I've seen him do though is shit out his mouth and collect porn."

"I'll take your word for it." Judging from his skeptical look, Raynare doubted it.

"The fuck are you doing here Dona? This place is devil territory."

"A side job here and there. Collecting potential favors. Maybe I was sent to make sure you were doing your job correctly." He casually hypothesized.

"And maybe you're a serial flasher and aren't wearing jack shit under your coat." She didn't believe him for a second. She had worked with him before, and while Donaseek was a two winged Fallen like herself, he was a noted veteran from the Great War that bit and clawed his way through many fights and setups. What he lacked in power he made up for in resourcefulness and cunning.

"Please." He thanked the tender as their drinks were delivered. "If I wanted to flash people en masse, I'd at least pick a place with more class than this."

"Don't start any shit here Dona. Seriously. I don't think the higher ups would turn a blind eye if you did this time." She wasn't particularly attached to him, but there was a comradery between the Fallen none the less. She could also smell a dirty deal offer from a mile away.

"Hoh?" The warning spoke far more unsaid words than the verbal message itself. "Is that so? Well then, we'll have to be a bit more discrete with our endeavors."

Fuck. He said "we". Not "we" as in "you and I", but "we" as in "me and my friends who you probably know". He was trying to lure her into being their lookout so that their jobs didn't cross. If she wasn't careful, he might let enough slip to make her guilty by association simply by knowing too much and force her to help out.

She was tempted. Oh so tempted to just throw this babysitting stunt to the wind and help him out. But several things stopped her.

First, Azazel himself gave her the task. Why? She had no clue, but she was loyal to the big man, and was not going to risk looking like a bigger potential risk in his eyes than she already was.

Second, while she did say that this was Devil territory, she didn't specify that this was Sitri and Gremory territory. Two of the four families that the Satans belonged to. If something went wrong and she was tied to it, even if Azazel didn't lop off her head, they sure as hell would.

Third, was the brat himself. She didn't like, respect, or trust him in the slightest. Case and point, she was drinking herself stupid because of him. The problem at hand was that he was still the Sekiryutei… or at least, everyone claims he is. She had yet to actually see any proof, but Azazel was damn sure that the kid was the one that destroyed his arm, so she wasn't going to question it.

Five years. It had been five years since the incident with the Dragons… Issei Hyoudou would have been twelve, thirteen at most at the time. And yet he still did all that damage… what kind of power was that perv hiding?

Raynare had done her research when she learned that her charge was actually the Sekiryutei, but was left with more questions than answers. The Boosted Gear was a Mid-Tier Longinus. It was valuable as hell to be sure. One of the thirteen mystic weapons that was theoretically capable of allowing a human to kill a God, but still far from the top four, which held absurd abilities that could potentially destroy the planet if they got out of hand.

Like any and every other Sacred Gear out there, it swapped users whenever the current holder died. Sometimes its owners wouldn't even awaken it to begin with. Some Sekiryutei had managed to cause some trouble over the course of history every now and then. Mass destruction and dragons went hand in hand after all…

… But absolutely none of them had ever come close to causing the shitstorm that the brat had stirred up single handedly.

Issei Hyoudou was confirmed to be dangerous from the get go. The real question in her mind was: how was he so different from his predecessors?

She doubted that being a hikikomori with a raging porn obsession was the reason.

"Yeah. You will." She flatly denied his unspoken question without any hint of hesitation. She was already stuck tits deep in a slew of plans that spanned multiple Factions and she was not going to add this little snafu into the works when she didn't even know the full depth of what she was in to begin with.

His amused smirk turned the slightest bit bitter just before he turned to his drink. "I suppose so."

"My advice? Whatever it is, get it done and get out of here without letting anyone know you were here. That's the best I can tell you." She didn't bother looking at him, focusing on her drink and sulking. Wonderful. She had come to this dive to get away and forget her current problems, and Dona just had to come and make them even more prominent.

"And I shall take it with a grain of salt as I am prone to."

"That explains your wrinkled old ass."

"Please. It's seasoned and magnificently aged."

o. o. o.

Friday afternoon.

Those two words normally invoked a magnificent and unmatched joy in most people in the world.

For people that worked standard nine to five jobs, it meant that they could cast off the role that they had sold themselves to in order to reap the benefits of their labors… or sleep.

For students, it was freedom from being confined in rooms where they were forced to learn facts and skills that were likely absolutely never going to help them get or perform a job or important life tasks once out of education.

However, in Kuoh Academy, while most of the students were pushing and shoving their ways out of the gates to enjoy the first of many weekends, back between two of the buildings that made up the complex, one student was more focused on something more important than temporary freedom.

"Haaaah."

Crouched down and leaning his head against the concrete wall, Issei desperately tried to force his mind and body to calm down.

This week had been nothing short of hell.

He tried. He really did try to get used to it. The people. The temporary moments of attention. The talking. The whispers…

He couldn't. It was too much. He was reaching the fringes of his limitations, and a measly two days of isolation was not going to cool his nerves enough to get him through another week.

It didn't help that he was perpetually aware of when people were focusing on him in particular. Fucking paranoia constantly keeping his Presence active, even if it was by the smallest margin.

And the bird. That fucking bird that just stood there on the tree outside his classroom window. All it did was just stare at him. All day. Every day. Never eating. Never leaving. Never even blinking. Pretending that it wasn't doing anything out of the ordinary.

If that thing was there next week, fuck the bird, the entire damn tree was going to burn magnificently and he would rejoice as though the second coming of Christ had been confirmed.

He really didn't like birds.

No. Don't focus on the bird. Just keep with your breathing exercises. Breathe in. Breathe out. Fill your lungs deeply. Let the oxygen flow through your body and soothe your nerves. Calm down so you don't…

"Hey! Look! Isn't that Hyoudou-san?"

… Kill any unfortunate idiots that get too close to you because you are a firm supporter of Darwin's theory.

His head rotated as if he was part machine, turning to look at the perverted duo Motohama and Matsuda looking at him in genuine surprise from the end of the alleyway. These two were among the biggest pains in his ass since entering the damn school, right behind the Devils that were constantly spying on him (not that they knew he was aware of them doing it in the first place), the Cougar (who endlessly tried to find an opportunity to kill him whenever school ended), but still ahead of Aika (who apparently was still trying to prove that she was better than him for the sake of her ego).

Every damn day they would try and stump him with Porn Trivia. They constantly failed because he wasn't kidding when he said he had an encyclopedic knowledge on the subject, but that didn't mean he actually liked showing it off when he had better things to do.

Like sleeping.

It didn't help matters that he was incapable of leaving a single question unanswered and throw on some additional facts and details on top of that. Actresses with multiple identities. Who had what STD from which film. Gross income. Origin. Secret lovers. How many directors, actors and actresses they've slept with. What makeup they wear. How many places they actually own. Etc.

What? He said he had an encyclopedic knowledge of the Adult Entertainment Industry and he'd be damned if he didn't back that fact to the best of his abilities.

If that was all the pair did, he wouldn't have minded them as much, but it wasn't. Issei didn't know if it was because the two were dropped multiple times at birth or because they were stupid, but either way they had almost zero common sense.

Bringing porn magazines to school, taking them out in class, and then loudly going over the articles?! Yelling at the girls that they were undressing them with their eyes and molesting them? Why the living fuck did Sona not expel these two already? Hell, the pair could easily have been arrested for being sexual predators by now if they weren't such incompetent morons!

"Hey. Hey. Don't tell me you found it too!?" The bald one, Matsuda accused, pointing an accusing finger at Issei.

The Seiryutei was generous and assumed the pair were too far away to see his bloodshot eyes and twitching eyelids. "Against my better judgement, I'll bite. Found what?"

"Only one of the greatest secrets in Kuoh Academy!" Motohama clenched a fist and looked up to the sky, crying what he thought was manly tears.

Issei probably would have just said the idiot was just leaking precum from his tear ducts because he was too excited and too stupid to use his dick right and got backed up as a result.

"Come on! We perverts have to stick together and share valuable knowledge." Matsuda rushed to a part of the wall just past Issei.

"Don't put me on your level." He was annoyed at the mere thought of being comparable to these two. These kids were the bottom of the barrel dregs that couldn't get anywhere without having their hands held… not that anyone would ever hold their hands.

Issei on the other hand liked to think that he was part of the upper caste of perverts. He was one of those suave bastards in movies that could actually get some top quality ass whenever he felt like it wherever he felt like it with the women in the end thanking him for giving them such a great time… if he ever felt like it. His damn disposition kinda made that a bit hard.

Being seventeen wasn't a problem. Not in Japan where the age of consent was thirteen of all things. The country was suffering from a depopulation crisis, but come on people, only freaks were that desperate.

"You're right. You still have to learn the ropes and stuff here since you're new." Motohama completely missed the point of Issei's grumbling as he strode past. "But now's a great a time as any to start learning. Check it out."

Rolling his eyes, he looked to the side to see what the big deal was, and saw nothing interesting other than a hole in the… wall…

Excited perverts, plus seemingly innocent looking opening in a building, equals…

"You have got to be shitting me." For once, the duo had caught him off guard. "A peep hole?"

"I know, right?!" Motohama grinned widely. "It shows the girl's changing room for the gym. It's hard to get here in time during period breaks, but it's a whole different story when it comes to club activities. We found it at the end of last year and we've only been caught once!"

Holy fuck he really was in an eroge school.

Wait.

Only caught once?

And this thing was still fucking here?!

That settles it. That student council president devil chick is an enabler and gets off on promoting fucked up behavior and standards in order to mess with the next generation. That is the only way that this place makes any sense anymore.

"Girls kendo club. First meeting." Matsuda grinned. "A smorgasbord of delectable meats. Fresh and seasoned choices. Nothing but in shape bodies just ready to get hot and sweaty."

"How you two haven't been arrested yet is seriously beyond me." Issei dropped his head in resignation. He'd better get his ass out of there fast before the idiots had their premature release and moaned loud enough for half the club to hear.

Seriously, why couldn't these clowns just jack off to internet porn like most people? Seeing it all in real life is nice, but in his opinion there was no point in going that far unless you were going to at least cop a feel on a nice pair of soft, comforting, blissful oppai. All or nothing. Making an attempt to do anything less than that is just pathetic.

"Personally I think it's because the student council president has a thing for Matsuda." Motohama stage whispered. "It's the way that she glares at him…"

Issei was pretty sure that they were confusing the acting abilities of a professional Sadist with the general look mature people have when scraping shit off the bottom of their shoes.

Then again, she is an enabler…

"Ah. Kendo girls really are the best." Mastuda sighed in bliss. "It's a shame that they get those bruises from practice so often."

He really couldn't argue with that. Deep bruises that come from contact sports did have a tendency of ruining skin, muscles and waaaaaait a moment…

"Bruises?" Issei asked firmly, catching the two by surprise. It was probably because he sounded the most awake he's been all week.

Didn't one of the idiots just say that it was the first meeting of the year? Unless they practiced during the break or got into some accident, none of them should have any markings period.

"Y-yeah." Motohama turned and was instantly cowed. While his eyes were still dead as could be, his gaze was unnervingly sharp and awake compared to his near half-conscious state. "It's not that uncommon for sports types. You know? A smudge on the shin. Some on the shoulders and chest when they're hit hard enough. A few on the back and neck…"

"Move." It wasn't a request and even clueless dolts like the perverted duo knew that something wasn't right by his tone.

Issei knew next to jack and shit when it came to kendo outside of vague rules and references that were made in anime, but he was pretty damn sure that doing the sport properly would not leave marks on a user's back and neck of all places.

And even if it was an accident at the time, there's no way that they'd show up on someone that came in for the first meeting of the year.

"Which one?" He asked evenly as he put his head to the peephole.

"Huh?" Motohama blinked in genuine confusion.

"Bruises. Neck and back. Describe her. Hair. Age. Eyes. Height. Weight. Looks. Location. Clothes. Be useful for a damn change." He ground out, already losing his patience.

"Hey. Matsuda. Do you hear…?"

"Uh." The peeper from earlier was clearly unnerved about something that Issei couldn't be bothered with. "Freshman. Medium bust. Slim build. 150 cm, give or take. No ass. Silver black hair down to chest. Brown eyes. Close to the back left of the room. Had her back to everyone earlier and wasn't talking to the others. Sorry Issei."

"Got her." Issei ignored the sound of footsteps behind him and focused on the girl in question.

His anger spiked. The difference was that it wasn't due to annoyance or personal issues for once.

"Son of a bitch."

"You got that right."

That wasn't one of the perverts. Or a guy.

It took a moment for Issei to piece together what had just happened. A brief look at the ground behind him showed more than a few pairs of feet surrounding him.

The fingers of one of the hands pressed up against the wooden wall he was leaning against flexed hard enough to dig in and splinter it.

Get back to the subject at hand Issei. Breathing exercises. In through the nose. Out through the mouth. Take it slow.

"Knowing full well you won't believe me, I'll say it regardless. It's not what it looks like."

And whatever you do, don't turn around.

They're just human. They won't live if you go berserk here.

He vaguely heard the sounds of several females spitting to the side in disgust and muttering unkind things about him. Vaguely because his heartbeat was being unreasonably loud.

"Oh?" A voice that sounded as if it was far closer to him than he was comfortable with mockingly asked. "Then do tell us Hyoudou. What are you doing?"

Trying not to let my paranoia and instincts get the better of me and accidentally kill you all.

He breathed in deeply again. He wanted to close his eyes. The darkness helped calm him down. But he couldn't. He had something to focus on.

"Subject is a female in her mid-teens and petite figure. Shows multiple abrasions all over her legs, back, and neck. Judging from varying colorations and sizes, they have taken place over an extended period of time. Blunt force trauma is suspected, either with a fist or similar sized flat sided implement. Neck abrasions are shown to wrap around its entirety, indicating choking, also likely by hand."

Whatever the girls behind him were expecting him to say, a professional clinical synopsis and diagnosis were not high on that list.

Then again, the subject matter wasn't exactly something easy to digest either.

"All injuries are common symptoms…" Issei concluded gravely. "… Of long term domestic abuse."

The alleyway was dead silent.

"Y-you're joking." Another voice stammered, not that he knew who it was, or cared for that matter. "You were here with the perverts. There's no other reason why you'd be peeping on us…"

Ah denial. How interesting it was to hear it from the other side of things for a change. "I wanted some peace and quiet. I haven't been feeling well all day. The idiots found me. I didn't know this stupid thing was here until two minutes ago. I wasn't even going to look until one of them brought up the bruises. If you don't believe me, just go in there and look at her body. Far back. Silver black hair. Looks like a freshman. Don't be forceful if she's already dressed though. It will only cause a negative reaction and make her panic. Get her to the school medical office if you can. Keep her calm and comfortable."

Focus on your breathing. In and out. Just be calm and don't give them a reason to gang up on you or come closer.

He heard shuffling behind him and whispers, but he couldn't care less at the moment. There were a good dozen girls in the room so his view of the subject in question was frequently blocked. Most of what he determined was just by looking at her from the waist up. He did manage to spot a few more marks on her upper thighs as she was putting on her clothes (the perv was right, she didn't have an ass), but otherwise there didn't seem to be any signs of broken bones or anything more severe.

"You can stop looking now pervert." Someone from behind him growled.

"Don't flatter yourselves. I don't get off on jail bait or the injured." He grunted back. There was more than a bit of irritation in his voice. "More abrasions are on her thighs and waist area, but doesn't appear to be bleeding or suffering from any genital injuries. There should be trouble sitting and getting up due to the pain, but it's possible she's just hiding it. Pretty much all the parts on her are easily hidden by the school uniform and other clothes. The abusers knew what they were doing."

"You seem pretty knowledgeable. What are you, some kind of doctor in training?"

The question gave him pause, and his lips pressed together into a firm line. "… I've taken a few classes."

"Probably to look at more naked pictures and know how a woman's body works." Another girl snarked.

"Oh God. I know you are dead, but if your dregs are around please tell me I'm not surrounded by a bunch of conceited brain dead neo-feminists that have as much intelligence as the average redneck drug den." He wasn't sexist, but he did have a huge gripe against stupid people that didn't listen or bother to try and learn things in general. Sheep that complained loudly but didn't do anything about the things they were moaning about were nothing more than a waste of space and life as far as he was concerned.

He had dealt with too many by half of them for one lifetime…

He was tempted. He was soooo tempted to ask the idiot if she knew how the male genital system functioned just to prove a point.

But he didn't. Partially because he was watching the patient in question be confronted by a fully clothed club member and gently asked about her condition.

Mostly because he was still barely holding himself together. It was getting harder to do so. His temper was failing. This wasn't good.

"I was looking to make sure that she wasn't going to get overly excited and panic when confronted. Victims of abuse can be unpredictable and violent if handled poorly. It's not uncommon to hurt themselves if they get overly excited." He lectured evenly, holding back the vomit that was creeping up his throat. He had to get out of there soon. "She's obviously uncomfortable, but is going with your friend without too much hassle."

One of the closer voices breathed out a sigh of relief. "That's good news then."

"Yeah. That means you can stop peeping now!" One of the more obnoxious voices snarled.

He closed his eyes and banged his head on the wall, causing many of the people inside to jump in alarm.

He knew it was bad karma to speak poorly of the dead, but screw it. Fuck you God. Fuck you so hard right now that Azazel would be jealous.

"What part of, I'm physically ill, didn't you get?" He all but ground out, eyes closed, pinching the bridge of his nose, and focusing as hard as he could on his breathing. He was practically swimming in his head by this point. He was getting dizzy.

"The part where you won't get away from the hole in the wall, dumbass."

"Did you stop to think that maybe I'm having trouble moving because I'm sick you child?" This wasn't good. He was losing control over himself again. "I have better things to do than look in on girls for a cheap thrill through a fucking hole that you already knew about and have done next to nothing to address. A hole that those two idiots have probably used and wacked off to at least a dozen times and mother fucking puss soaked swelling of a scarlet whore I've been standing in the dried spunk of those two shit for brains for over five minutes. I am going to fucking kill those heathenistic defilers next time they show themselves."

The instant Issei had realized his current situation he had instinctively slipped back into English to properly vocalize just how pissed he was. Most of the girls could only grab a word or two, but Kuoh was an international school, so there were a couple of native English speakers among the group.

"Uh. I'm starting to think that he's really not lying." One girl that clearly understood every word he was saying nervously laughed as Issei continued to tirade and rant. She had heard plenty of bad strings of curses and threats before, but this was definitely ranking up there.

"Why? What is he saying?" Another asked curiously.

"They will beg. They will beg for sweet release as I hang them over a pit of broken glass and rusted metal by their broken fingers. Singing blissful nothings of agony while their flesh and bone slowly deforms in a myriad of ways. Only then will I grace them with the blessing of fire…"

"… Things I am not comfortable repeating. Or writing down. Or remembering." The former began to back away slowly. "I don't feel safe being here anymore."

Several girls weren't judging by their similar reactions. If they didn't know any better, they could swear that a black and malevolent aura was being emitted from his body.

"Does it matter what he's saying? He's still a pervert that needs to learn his lesson. Even if he was right, it was only because he peeked in the first place." One of the more obnoxious voices tried to rally the group again.

His teeth clenched. This was bad. He had slipped into a bad mood by accident. If the girls tried anything now…

His breathing became deeper and more uneven.

"Hey. Katase." One of the closer girls whispered. "Did you notice…?"

"Yeah. He might not be kidding about being sick after all, Murayama." The girl that was likely Katase agreed.

Finally, someone develops some brain cells.

"Hyoudou. Are you that unwell?"

He heard a single soft step get closer to him.

Shit.

His eyes dilated and his breathing deepened. He wasn't prepared for anyone to approach him.

No.

Another step.

Don't come closer.

Memories that he buried were clawing to the front of his mind.

Coming out of the building with a coat over his head. Large crowds yelling all at once, wanting to see him. Taking pictures. To ask him about things that he didn't do. To threaten him. To accuse him…

Please.

Where was he? School? But everyone here was speaking in Japanese…

Another step.

"Hey. He's shaking. I don't think he's faking it."

I didn't do it. I didn't do it.

He couldn't breathe. He couldn't breathe. It was suffocating. Too close. They were too close. Where was everyone? Mom? Auntie Ophis? Dad? Nee-san? Why? What was happening?

Why?

"Excuse me? Is something happening here?"

Nearly every head in the alleyway turned to the new speaker at the end of the alleyway. Katase, who had almost reached out to touch Issei's shoulder, was among them.

Nearly, because Issei had collapsed to his hands and knees to the side and started to throw up relentlessly on the ground.

Why doesn't anyone ever believe me?

No one noticed his left arm momentarily warping into a crimson gauntlet and back as he did so.

o. o. o.

By the time he realized where he was and what he was doing, he had probably emptied his stomach three times over. If he looked carefully, he'd even see traces of blood in the bile pooling in front of him.

"I convinced the girls that I was enough to make sure you were ok and weren't going to spy on them. You were really going to attack them, weren't you?"

He was too tired to put up a guard or jump away. Or say something witty for that matter. His senses were as screwed up as his head, so he couldn't use them to identify the speaker, but at the very least he could tell that he wasn't surrounded anymore.

Still, he was stubborn to a fault. Stubborn like only a dragon could be.

Whoever it was at least knew that he was dangerous, which meant she knew about how the world really worked.

"I tried to make them leave. They wouldn't listen." His tongue was numb. He had to put in an effort not to slur his words.

Exhausted, he turned his head and looked up to see the only person in the alleyway with him now. She was standing a short distance away, but clearly not close enough to make him uncomfortable.

Purple.

That was the color of the lace panties she was wearing. Risky, but still fashionable. Something only worn by people that wanted it to be seen or girls that wanted to feel more grown up and make themselves feel mature.

Smooth ivory white skin. Flawless really. Perfect hips and legs with not a mark on them. He could already tell that her ass was likely to be just as sublime.

And a little above that was a hint of neatly trimmed red pubic hair.

Huh. A natural redhead.

Fuck, he was drowning in colors. Was he dreaming about skittles again? Sweets don't do much to wash away the taste of stomach acid.

Wait. Shit. Red hair?

"I'm going to assume that you're stuck there because of exhaustion and not because you're infatuated with my underwear." The owner of the kaleidoscope of colors sounded amused.

Instead of saying anything, Issei just let his head drop and began to spit out the remains of the bile in his mouth. He didn't have much of an appetite recently, which is probably why a good portion of the pool in front of his head was stomach acid.

Rias Gremory. Sirzechs' little sister. If there was ever a reason to think that he was being set up going to the damn school, it was her and Sona Sitori. At least the Cougar wasn't anyone important or notable.

He had pegged the redhead as a Devil on Tuesday when he saw her get swarmed by a bunch of girls in the hallway at a distance.

The hair caught his attention.

Her tits were what confirmed her and her Queen as Devils.

It was a field of study he had started and named himself.

Mahou Oppai Butsuri.

Magic Boob Physics in English.

He called it the laws of MOB for short.

Seriously. If you weren't human and your cup size was DD or bigger, your tits were guaranteed to not follow the laws of conventional physics. At all. Watching non-human woman walk around casually was like watching one of those poorly designed beach volleyball video games. Their boobs just bounced and jiggled everywhere for no reason. Like, at all.

It's maddening! It just doesn't make any damn sense! And yet he was incapable of looking away! It was hypnotizing!

Countless hours trying figure out how that magnificent phenomenon occurred! He… wait, what was he thinking about again?

*Boing*

Rias shifted her stance the smallest of margins and her breasts jumped as if she was in the middle of a cataclysmic earthquake.

Issei saw it all through his peripheral vision.

Mother fucking oppai are mocking him again! They know he's watching! But he can't… look… away…

"… Enochlophobia."

And like that, all testosterone based thoughts of his were killed instantly.

Her soothing voice laced with some pity stated, causing him to pause. "A fear of large crowds of people. It can also include being surrounded by people in confined spaces. You have an extreme case at that. Crippling even. Judging from what just happened, I suspect you have haphephobia too, though nowhere as extreme case as the former. A fear of being touched by others. It would explain your reaction to being woken up by others."

His fingers clenched up into fists. His temper rose. A deep, guttural noise escaped from his mouth.

It wasn't the sort of sound a human could make.

"Mixed with that temperament of yours… Koneko was right. You really shouldn't have come here. I'm honestly astounded that you've lasted this long without help."

"What do you want?" His throat burned, but not in the way he was intimately familiar with.

He knew damn well what he had. It was the reason why he barely trusted himself to go outside anymore, not that he wanted to. As far as he was concerned, he didn't even have a hope of having a normal life anymore, much less a productive one. Dragging others into his twisted macabre of a life would only make things worse.

Rias Gremory crossed her arms under her impressive chest and stood her ground. She had warned Sona about Issei's disposition, and the two had pooled their resources to keep watch over him for the entire week. Day by day, they saw him progressively fall apart and made note of his habits.

The fact that he always hung back away from crowds. The fact that he always entered and left the school at times and locations that no one else used. The fact that he flinched or reacted aggressively whenever someone touched him unexpectedly. The fact that he would take a few moments to go through deep breathing exercises in order to calm down whenever he was facing a situation that he was uncomfortable with.

If Koneko didn't give them the heads up that he was a mess on the inside, it probably would have taken Rias over a month to put this much together.

To be perfectly honest, Issei being at their school with his disposition unnerved the two heiress'. It wasn't going to help anyone if he kept this up. Just the opposite. His near mutilation of the kendo club was a perfect example of this.

"Aside from making sure you didn't accidentally kill your classmates in a blind fit of hysteria, I just wanted to talk." She negotiated. "I've sent you messages and letters, but you have a habit of conveniently forgetting to keep them in mind."

That was a lie and they both knew it. At best, what she said was a sarcastic twist on his actions in an attempt to excuse his poor behavior. It didn't matter if Kiba had invited him or if it was a formal request slipped into his shoe locker. Issei blew them off every day that week without so much as a blink of hesitation, or word of apology.

"Bullshit. I know what happens if I "stop and talk" with your type. Fallen. Angel. Devil. Doesn't make a fucking difference. You're all the same." He didn't even bother to try to hide what he felt. He didn't trust any of them. All they cared about were their own goals.

"And humans are any different? I was under the impression that you were smart enough to see past that particular veil." She had seen enough to know that he was far more aware of his situation than he let on. He wasn't muscles without brains. He simply did not want to deal with the world in general.

"Power seeks power, regardless of what shape or species it takes. I don't want it, I don't need it, and I sure as hell am not in the market to give mine out. I don't have a price. Find a slave somewhere else." He spat out one last time before slowly pushing himself up. Down on all fours he might as well have been the same as any dog or animal, but at his full height he easily towered over Rias. Actually, he was probably one of the tallest students in the school.

His eyes were bloodshot, and bags were dragging his gaze down. If he told someone he was sick, no one would question his claim.

Despite his intimidating appearance, Rias did not back down.

… Even if she instinctively felt as if he wouldn't mind tearing her apart right then and there.

"That would be enticing if I knew what your power was in the first place. I won't lie and say that I'm not curious or tempted to know what you're capable of, but I'm not a fool either. I've been warned by too many by far that you're dangerous, and I've taken it to heart. I'm not going to invade your privacy and ask for your power or find out what it is."

She had to be straight forward and honest if she wanted to get anywhere with him. Being coy and ambiguous would just make him run away faster without paying her words any mind.

Issei snorted. He didn't believe her for a second. He turned to where he left his school bag leaning up against the wall earlier.

He still had to fill out that stupid paper as homework. It was all about things he wanted and planned to do when he graduated. Generic stuff to remind him that he was supposed to have a future after school.

What did he want to do as a career?

"I want to be a-"

He buried the memory as soon as it came up. There wasn't a point to it anymore. There wasn't a point to most of what he's done anymore.

This day was just a giant nightmare that was made of smaller ones, one after another.

Rias sighed. She knew dealing with Issei was going to be difficult, but at least he wasn't at risk of lashing out at anyone now.

"My bishop is like you."

He paused. He had expected her to say a whole slew of things, but this wasn't one of them.

"He has severe agoraphobia. He can't control his powers and grew up in an isolated and abusive environment. I came across him by happenstance after he was killed running away from his family. Honestly, I've never met anyone that is as shy and kind as he is. He does not have the heart for battle, but I don't wish to see him locked away for the rest of his life either. He doesn't deserve it." Rias elaborated, knowing that she had to use this brief moment to its fullest potential. "I've tried multiple times to help him myself. Talked to him. Consoled him. I've even hired several professionals, but nothing's worked. I thought that you being, well, you, might be able to help him."

Issei didn't say anything, but he didn't leave either. Instead he turned around and looked directly into her azure eyes for the slightest hint of a lie or falsehood in her story.

Neither one of them budged in the slightest for what seemed like minutes.

"You're leaving out an awfully large amount of details from that story." He stated skeptically, breaking the silence first.

"It's fairly long." She admitted. "I doubt you'd want to spend all afternoon listening to it in an alleyway that you just threw up in. Somehow, I suspect that yours is just as long and complicated."

He would give her that, even if she was stepping dangerously close into forbidden territory.

"If what you say is true, then why are you still asking me? I'm not exactly stable." He had violent reactions when his limits were pushed and his social skills were nonexistent.

"But you're trying. That's more than what he's accomplished in the past three years." She held her ground. "I know you're not the same. I am not stupid enough to assume that your issues and their roots are remotely similar, but you can still relate to what he's going through better than anyone else I can find."

"And you think looking and speaking to 'this' will change his mind?" Issei asked incredulously, gesturing to himself and the vomit pooling to the side. "I can't even last a week here without striking out at people in a blind panic. A role model I am not."

"I don't need a role model. I can find one of those anywhere. I need an example. I need someone he can relate to." Rias would not accept his rejection. "You found something that gave you enough reason to go outside, even if it reduced you to this state. Help him find his reason. That's all I ask."

Huffing in annoyance and turning around, he started to walk down the alleyway. "I'm not some charity!"

Rias let out a sigh of relief that she didn't know she was holding back. "Then name your price! I can work with Sona to make being at school easier if needed!"

"Don't take me for an idiot. After what almost happened, you were going to do that regardless."

A small smirk made its way onto the redhead's lips. He was right. She didn't intend to screw him over though. Her initial offer was more of a way to see just how insightful he really was. "Fair enough. We can negotiate the terms later when you're better, if you are still interested."

Maybe it was the confidence in her voice. Maybe it was Issei being at the end of his patience. Maybe it was simply a whim.

Whatever it was, Rias didn't expect what happened next.

She was looking at something terrifying. Something massive and vicious. It had been hidden away, reclusive, even lenient, but its absurd power was something that eclipsed her ability to comprehend up close.

It was only because the beast had barely acknowledged she existed in the first place that she realized it was there in the first place, and just how small she was.

"I wouldn't feel so accomplished if I were you." Issei spoke softly, not once looking back. "I'm humoring your request because I'm simply foolish enough to still have a heart. It would be, unfortunate, if you ever decided to take my good graces for granted."

He didn't bother looking, or acknowledging that Rias had fallen to her knees from the experience.

He simply just walked away from her and to the main gates of the school.

He did however… completely forget about his schoolbag.

o. o. o.

Hyoudou Residence, two hours later:

"… FUCK!"

o. o. o.

Issei, Seven years old:

"How was school today Issei?" Asami smiled as her son sat down at the dinner table.

"It was good. It's really boring though." The boy pouted. Ever since he had managed to get a hang of using Ddraig's power to study and train, he had been way ahead of his class and constantly getting perfect scores. His memory and ability to learn was even improving without the Boosted Gear these days too simply because he was smarter after the training, which was even better. His growth was practically exponential! Weren't the teachers supposed to notice when someone was doing classwork that easily? Honestly, he felt like he was cheating… huh. Cheating. He should probably call his use of Ddraig's powers that. It sounded pretty cool now that he thought about it…

"Now now. School's boring, but you have to learn." Ichirou Hyoudou patted his son on the head. "Eventually you'll have to grow up and get a real job like your old man to make money. The smarter you are, the easier it is to get the job you want."

"I know that much." Issei rolled his eyes. "I'm going to have a harem. I need money in order to keep everyone happy."

"Ahah. Right. Harem." Asami's mouth twitched in a way that made it clear that she wasn't exactly thrilled with his statement. "

Ichirou gave his son a thumbs up, clearly nowhere near as turned off by the idea as his wife was. "You are a smart boy Issei. If you do get a harem, you have papa's approval."

WHAM!

"Harem or not, Issei's too young for that kind of talk dear." Asami ignored the goose egg coming from the part of her husband's head that she had just punched.

"Yes mama." Ichirou wept.

"Mom's scary when she's mad." Issei stated, shivering.

"Yes I am." Asami didn't deny it for a moment as she sat down at the table. "Issei, about earlier. You said that you wanted to make a lot of money when you grew up. Does that mean that you know what you want to be?"

"Mmm!" The boy nodded with a wide smile.

"Seven years old and he's already planning ahead. Papa's so proud." Ichirou was still crying. He was probably trying to preserve what masculinity he had left by masking his tears of pain with ones of pride.

"Well? What is it?" Asami probed.

The Sekiryutei thrust his chest out and stuck his nose up in the air.

"I'm gonna be a doctor!"

o. o. o.

Omake: Why the Cougar doesn't have a MOB trigger:

Issei yawned as he opened up Raynare's bedroom door. "Oi Cougar. Hurry up. We have to hurry to the damn school."

Raynare didn't respond. She was petrified in shock and alarm, bending over to pull up her black but not too slutty underwear (she didn't want to give the perverted idiots an opportunity to see something worthwhile), giving him a picture perfect view of her flawless ass. The only piece of clothing actually on her was her bra.

The two stared at one another in condemning silence. Their facial expressions didn't change in the slightest.

Slowly, a trail of blood leaked from Issei's nose.

"Holy shit." The male broke the silence first. "You're actually wearing a bra that has proper support and design for your cup size. I've never heard of someone from your side of-"

"OUT! NOW!"

o. o. o.

Omake: Birrrrrrrrd:

Rias looked at Kiba with some worry. "Is he ok?"

The handsome blonde young man sighed as he gently tended to his familiar, a small falcon. While it was as stunning as its owner, it was obvious to anyone that looked that the thing was not in the best of health. Its posture was slouched and it was having trouble keeping its eyes open.

"He's tired and a bit stressed." The Knight replied. "I don't know why though. He hasn't been doing anything strenuous or taxing lately."

"Hmm. How sad. Poor thing." The redheaded beauty sighed, looking at the creature in pity. "I'll send word to a familiar doctor to see if we can get help."

"Thank you. I'm sorry he's like this. I know we need as many eyes on Hyoudou-san as possible soon." Neither teen noticed the exhausted bird twitch slightly.

"Don't worry. With Sona's help we can afford to give your familiar a break." Rias smiled kindly.

Half an hour later, the unnamed bird was soaring in the air, enjoying the late afternoon sun and relaxing in the slipstreams above Kuoh.

Finally. Freedom. No longer would it have to stalk, follow and watch that terrifying Dragon in human skin. No longer would it have to endure hour after hour of killing intent directed at it from inside the school. No longer would it have to-

It froze. Animal instincts seized its heart and body, causing horrifying panic to set in.

No. It couldn't be.

Slowly. Ever so slowly.

It looked down. Hundreds of meters. Almost a thousand meters below. Where humans and buildings alike were nothing but small marks on the earth.

There. A dot was looking up at it. Standing at the edge of the street. A monster in broad daylight.

No. Not again.

The human with brown hair and dead eyes didn't look away. A sick and twisted smile that belonged to the deranged and possessed slowly chiseled its way onto his face. One that even the familiar could see with traumatizing clarity.

"Biiiiiiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrrrrrddddddddd."

Kiba couldn't find or call his Familiar for three weeks. Even then, it refused to ever be called to Kuoh again.