Chapter 10

"I know." Issei didn't even bother putting up a fight. It was as good as a confirmation that he would go through with Michael's request.

"I'll inform the Maou and Azazel about the turn of events regarding Asia." Michael held back a sigh, knowing that the hardest part of the conversation was over. "… It goes without saying, but Asia's place of residence is not the only issue that needs to be addressed promptly on your side."

"I know." There was more steel in his voice this time. More conviction. Focus.

"Keep me updated on what you find. Depending on who is involved, this may have to be dealt with delicately. Do try to keep the attention to yourself at a minimum. This has to be kept quiet."

"I know how the dance works. You don't have to remind me."

"Don't be too sure. You've locked yourself inside for five years. It doesn't matter how smart or good you are. You're out of practice. Acting like a child and exploiting other's underestimation of you will only work if they don't know who you are in the first place. Worse still if they actually know how you fight. The fact that they came to Kuoh in the first place likely means that someone knows you're there. And you don't have Blind Eternity to bail you out if you get hurt too badly…"

"Fine. Fine. I get it. I'll be careful. I'll even add a cherry on top and promise I won't set anything on fire while I'm at it. You happy now? Is that all you want to say?"

Michael was about to say yes, but paused before the word escaped his lips. He rarely ever spoke to Issei in private, even before the incident. If there was something he felt should be said, now would be the best chance he would have.

"… There is one thing you should know." He started slowly.

Issei groaned, knowing that he wasn't. "What is it? What happened?"

"Promise me you will keep your temper in check."

"You're already pushing it." His tone was already getting annoyed again.

"Issei."

"Fine. Fine. I'll try to not strangle you over the phone with a phone cord that doesn't exist. Now what is it?"

"There's, an event coming up. Involving the Devils. Sirzechs, hopes, that you will attend it." Michael chose his words carefully.

Issei's passive mood vanished entirely. True to his word though, he didn't explode outright, taking a few moments to calm himself down before talking again. "And why would I want to attend what will likely be a high class aristocratic gathering where people will pass the time trying to see who has the biggest gilded shaft up their ass as if it's something to be proud of?"

"I can't say. Much like how Sirzechs can't ask you to attend directly either. The rules around it are complicated. It is similar to what stayed our hands, back then."

The teen frowned, a menacing growl rumbling from his throat again. "He wants to use me. You want to use me. Again. That's why you bastards pushed so hard to get me out this year."

"Please calm down. Make no mistake, I have no stake in this. Neither does Azazel." Michael retreated. "That being said, we do share Sirzechs' distaste in the event itself. If you knew what we did, no, you'd probably be able to figure out everything if you simply were aware of what the event was and who it was for."

Issei's free hand tightened into a fist, his arm shaking in rage. "I thought I told you that I didn't want to be a part of whatever bullshit schemes your groups had anymore. I'm not some fucking pawn or tool for you to move around at your leisure to do things that I have nothing to do with!"

"Issei, while you have a point, there is one thing you are mistaken about. I cannot disclose the specifics, but you are involved in this. Even if you had decided to stay inside this year, one could claim that you were a critical part in its making if they knew what really happened five years ago. Also, it is not something that you, or any of us, would let pass if given the option to intervene in the first place. Unfortunately, you are the only one that can interfere without serious repercussions."

"Then tell me about the damn thing already? Why the secrecy?"

Michael sighed. He knew he was playing with fire, but he had no choice. Had he left things the way they were, and allowed Issei to simply get roped into what was to come, then there was little doubt in the Arcangel's mind that all hell would break loose in the form of Issei completely loosing trust with the three Factions. The boy's temperament was worse than they had thought.

"I told you, Sirzechs, and the other Maou are bound to a position of non-interference. Much like how they, Azazel and I were stopped from helping you back then. This roundabout path to get you involved, as much as we are all loathe to go through with it, is the only way available without sparking something worse from happening. You know that we are not as all powerful as everyone makes us out to be. If it were up to Sirzechs, he would have simply obliterated those responsible for this in the first place instead of getting you involved."

"But he can't, so I'm the next best thing. An obvious scape goat. Clearly that's a sound plan in the works." Issei spat out venomously, desperately trying to keep his temper in check. He had to calm down. Being hot headed wouldn't help in a complex situation like this. Sirzechs obviously was not doing him any favors, but Michael clearly sounded like he meant what he said by Issei being a last resort.

It was clear that the Angel was losing Issei. There were few options left, but only one of them had a high chance of working.

"Issei. This event will give you a chance to gain some vindication for what happened. With no strings attached."

The teen froze, his spine went rigid, and his eyes widened in genuine shock.

"Did I hear you right?"

"I won't repeat myself." Michael loathed the concept of revenge, much less promoting it. However it was a necessary evil to get Issei to listen again.

The silence on the line was long and damning. It spoke of things in greater detail than any words could convey.

"… When is it?"

Michael didn't dare show any sign of relief. It was too early to count his blessings. "It's supposed to take place sometime next year, but there are rumors that one of the parties involved is trying to have the date pushed up soon."

A flexible date. Devil only. An arrangement between multiple major parties in the Devil faction. Possibly between families. One of them is likely the Gremorys if Michael's description of Sirzech's feelings on the matter is that severe. Well, them, or it somehow involved his wife and son, Grayfia and Millicas. As for the other party, it could be only one of two Families… no, he didn't have enough information. Devil connections and politics were complicated. Best not jump to conclusions just yet.

But how would getting Issei out of the house lead to enabling a loophole to get him involved in the festivities? Unless…

"The Weeb and Enabler are in on this." He growled.

"Who, oh. Right. That is what you're calling young Rias and Sona." Michael coughed, trying to forget everyone's reactions when Azazel let loose that amusing bit of information during their last meeting. Serafall's frustration in trying to decipher Issei's logic had driven her to near insanity much to everyone's entertainment.

Still, it was again scary just how fast Issei's mind had jumped in the right direction with such little conjectural information. The boy wasn't completely right with his assumption, but he was far closer than most could get that quickly.

"No. They are as they seem. Competent, if slightly entitled and opinionated, teenage high class Devil girls that are trying to do things on their own and strive for independence. They aren't trying to follow some scheme that their siblings eked out for them, nor are they aware of said plans to begin with. Give Sirzechs and Serafall more credit than that. Do you really think they would risk painting a target on their little sisters' foreheads if you let your temper get the better of you again?"

Unknowing accomplices then. Hardly better, but at the very least they aren't going after him with malicious intent. They're just being annoying.

Wonderful. That meant that Issei's best chance of getting more information about this clusterfuck was by, ugh, socializing.

If he got stuck in an acid death pussy one more time because of those scrubs, heads were going to roll and or burn in an order that he so chose that may or may not involve multiple iterations of both violent acts. It may sound impossible without extreme regeneration, but damn it, he would find a way.

"Fine. I get it. Be patient and friendly. Blame Zechs and Sera for whatever happens next."

"With you, it's normally either them or Azazel. Not that I mind." Michael slightly relaxed as Issei fell into line. So long there were no more curveballs in the conversation, they should be good.

"Eccentrics make convenient scapegoats."

The Angel wisely did not comment on that. After all, Issei had been one of said scapegoats. "I'll deal with things on my side. You tie up the loose ends on yours. Be careful. You haven't seen any action in years, and you know better than anyone how much precision matters in your fighting style."

"You don't have to remind me." Issei looked back at the very confused and scared Asia. The girl no doubt must be terrified after his minor episode. "Keep the Church in line. Odds are they're gonna do something stupid the second word gets out that she's staying with me."

"That goes without saying." Michael sighed, knowing that Heaven's "devout" followers tended to bend and break the rules more often than not. "… Gabriel wanted to talk. She misses you."

"… Goodbye Leo."

o. o. o.

"He hung up, didn't he?"

Michael turned back to look at Gabriel, giving his phone a sad look.

"Mmm. He's better than he used to be. And his mind as sharp as his tongue…"

"But his heart is still damaged beyond belief." The most beautiful woman in Heaven concluded, her eyes on the verge of unleashing tears of true remorse. Even crying, she was beautiful. No, rather, her crying merely bestowed upon the world a different face of true beauty that Gabriel possessed. "We should have helped him then, Michael. Regardless of what might have come from our actions."

"And he would have blamed no one but himself when the fires and calls for war spread. You know that better than I do Gabriel. There was no way out of that situation that would have given the boy peace of mind and soul." Michael cut her off.

"That Devil. How Sirzechs can permit such a woman to still exist after what she has done, what she is doing now, is beyond me."

"They do not have the fortune of living in a system fabricated by Father. Do not mistaken a willing sin for an unfortunate circumstance." Michael made to pocket the phone, but caught himself. He was likely going to be using it all afternoon.

"Is there a problem?"

"Nothing certain at the moment. Only speculation. I will likely be busy for some time."

"I see." Gabriel gently wiped her eyes and regained her composure. "And you, brother? How are you faring? The last time you encountered Issei directly was when he lost control of himself and you…"

Her eyes trailed to Michael's face. He was a handsome man with long blonde hair that almost matched hers in terms of luster and length. More than enough to make it hard to see his face from some angles.

… Almost more than enough to hide the burn scar that covered his right eye and extended back to his ear and up to the hairline.

He smiled gently, the warped skin on his burn scar twisted to try and pathetically mimic what the other side of his face was doing. "I am as I always have been sister. We both know that what I experienced and lost was paltry compared to what he did."

o. o. o.

"All right! Gather round scrubs! New plan! Which is sort of like the old plan but still a new plan!" Issei clapped his hands together before pocketing his phone and putting his hands behind his back.

"There was a plan?" Gasper blinked in confusion.

"What's he saying?" Asia asked Saji.

"Something about a plan."

"This better not be stupid." Raynare rolled her eyes.

"Ok! First thing's first. Ninja Puppy is going to be staying at my place for the foreseeable future."

"WHAT?!" More than one people shouted, emotions and confusion varying from person to person. Asia, again, was simply looking around scared and confused.

"Don't blame me. Blame the KFC twelve piece family special turtle in Heaven. It wasn't my idea. He's going to be sending word to the Maou and Azazel about this soon enough, so I need you grunts to smooth things over with the Weeb and the Enabler when they find out so they don't hit their menstrual cycles early."

"Why don't you do it?" Raynare frowned. "You're the one that actually knows what's going on."

"I might not get back soon. You see, while you guys are going food shopping for ingredients for the brownies that will prevent Auntie O from murdering us all, I am going to follow through and meet the people that were supposed to pick up the Ninja Puppy in the first place. We will then proceed to have a, discussion."

Issei pulled out his hands from behind his back, revealing a note pad and a pen that he clearly did not have on his person before and started to write. "The brownies are made from scratch, so you're going to be buying a fair amount of ingredients. High quality only. I'll give you guys 20k to pay for it all, but I expect a receipt and exact change when I get back."

"Wait. After all this crap about the Church and cussing out the top angel of Heaven, you're still going on about the brownies?!" Saji half shouted in disbelief.

"Excuse me, I'm sorry, but have you ever seen what the Oroboros Dragon is like when she's got the munchies and I, her unofficial supplier of said munchies, fails to fulfil said obligations? No? Ok, then if you don't mind, I kindly request you shut the fuck up before I tell her that you were the one that ate her brownies. I'll be sure to cover your funeral expenses if I survive and manage to find any of your remains. Here are the ashes of the Runt. Murdered painfully and violently for eating the Dragon God's brownies."

"Fine. Fine. I get it." He knew he wasn't up to date with the latest political and power standings of the mythical world, but he knew when his back was against the wall.

"Dio."

"Gasper."

"Dio. You're taking care of the Ninja Puppy while I'm gone. You're the least threating looking person here despite being full of evil. Make sure she doesn't wander off anywhere. Try to keep her calm and at ease while you're shopping. No corrupting her either. Last thing we need is an Evil Ninja Puppy running loose. The second we'd take our eyes off her, the world would be doomed."

"Ok? I think?" Gasper looked at Asia nervously. As a vampire devil hybrid, he was particularly susceptible to the workings of the Church, but Asia seemed to be a nice person. That prayer she did earlier really hurt his head, but she didn't seem to do it on purpose to hurt him. Issei didn't set them up together so that she would kill him, did he?

"Cougar. As terrible of an idea as it sounds, you're in charge. You're the most competent of the lot, which isn't really saying much."

"Hey!" Gasper, Saji, and Raynare replied, all for varying reasons.

"Hate the truth, not the speaker." Issei took out a couple of 10k bills from his wallet and handed them along with his shopping list to the Fallen. "Keep everyone together. Get the shopping done. Get back home, and explain to the others what happened. Don't assume anything. If you don't know the answer to something, just say that I'll answer it when I get back."

"You're not meeting up with us?" Saji frowned, failing to see the look of disbelief and some glee that Raynare had at the money in her hands.

"I don't know how long this will take. Shouldn't be long, but I've been wrong before." Issei sighed, taking out his phone and pulling up the GPS. "Runt, where's the church on here?"

"The church? Oh uh. It's about a mile and a half northwest from here, up on the edge of town on a hill. It's hard to miss." Saji pointed it out on the map. "This general area."

"Right." The Sekiryutei turned to the last person there.

Asia was clearly confused if the shifting and uncomfortable look on her face was any indication. She flinched and shied away slightly the moment he looked at her, unsure of what was going to happen.

He paused from that reaction. The girl was clearly innocent and confused, that was understandable, but the fear? She was actually scared of him, and she didn't do anything.

He started to say something to her, but the words died in his mouth. He deserved her response.

A fool that loses control of himself and attacks the people closest to him didn't deserve the benefit of the doubt.

Instead he turned around and began to walk away from the group. "Tell her that she's going to be in good care. Calm her down. She's scared and confused in a place she's never been in before. That idiot in Heaven wouldn't have told her to stay at my place if it wasn't safe."

Walking away from the group, he completely missed Asia figuring out that her fear of him drove him away, her expression changing from being scared to one of shame and a person that wanted to apologize.

The change was not missed by the others there.

"Sempai. Wait." Gasper called out to Issei as the elder walked around the tree they had gathered near. The plant was big enough that it completely blocked their view of him as he went around it. "I think you got the wrong idea about Asia. Hold on a…"

As the vampire turned around the tree, he managed to catch a glimpse of something red flashing and a blur. His ears managed to detect the shuffling of several leaves and branches shaking as if they were hit with something.

But he didn't see Issei anywhere.

o. o. o.

Kuoh Church Gates:

The north part of Kuoh was a rather spread out area. Various buildings surrounded with large properties could be found here. It was where both prime real estate and abandoned buildings could be found in abundance, yet was still close enough to the main town that it was easily reached during the height of holiday events when people are out and about.

WHAM!

Thankfully, while it was a Saturday, nobody was interested in this area during the time that Issei seemed to teleport into existence by means of colliding with the heavy metal gates of the abandoned Church, hitting the iron hard enough to dent it with his skull.

"Son of a bitch!"

"Hahahaha! Michael was right! You have lost your touch!" Ddraig laughed heartily as his partner laid out spread eagle on the ground with swirls for eyes.

"Shut up." The concussed teen slurred. "I'm not rusty. I'm just not practiced using you with this body yet."

"You mean you aren't practiced with crashing into metal gates and the ground with that body! Ahahahaha! This reminds me of when you first started using my powers! Vali would kill you just to save face if he ever saw you like this!" Ddraig clearly wasn't letting Issei have any ground to stand on.

"If you're going to laugh your unwiped scaled ass off, can you do it deeper inside so you don't make my hemorrhaging worse?" Issei cradled his skull. Loud noises and concussions don't mix well. Loud noises that originate from inside your mind and concussions mix worse.

Still, it was a good thing he had reinforced his body beforehand, otherwise he might have crushed his skull from the impact.

"Ow. Ow ow ow ow." Still holding a hand to his head, the teen got up. One hand supporting himself, the other glowing green to heal his injuries and more importantly, making his headache die down a bit. It was a slightly stupid move since most medics trained in magic would never attempt to heal a head injury on themselves for obvious reasons, but Issei didn't really give a damn at that point.

"… Ha. While it is fun to watch you make a fool out of yourself like old times, I do feel I must warn you that this may be a bad idea partner. You are rather quick to learn things, but even I doubt that you'd be back to snuff by the time you get through the front doors of that building."

"Shut up. You make it sound like I'm the sort of idiot that goes into places guns blazing."

"No. You're the sort of idiot that goes into places with a cocky attitude, pisses off everyone with your intellect, and goads others into throwing the first punch by being obnoxious."

"I stand corrected." His headache was feeling much better. He'd rather have an aspirin, but beggars couldn't be choosers. "Good thing I don't feel much like fighting these days."

"Vali would be disappointed."

"Vali can suck my dick. That dumbass is a total battle junkie with tunnel vision. Dude needs to get laid."

"So do you."

The teen glared at his left hand.

"Don't even try to deny it. You're wound up around yourself so badly you might as well be the Gordian Knot. You need to relax. Why not mate with that Fallen or one of those humans that fawn over you at the school? Unlike using me, your touch with the human body hasn't gotten stale."

"I'm not fucking some clueless girl that knows less about sex than what they're actually doing in life. And the Cougar would rather kill me than employ the idea of having sex."

The Devils never entered the list of options of potentials as far as either of them were concerned. There was too much history there. Too many reasons not to trust them that far.

"Regardless, you need to unwind partner. Your hobbies are decent enough distractions, but that is all they are. Distractions. They neither help nor hinder your condition. Only stall it."

Issei moved to make an argument, but seemingly gave up on the idea with a heavy sigh. Instead, he simply stood up straight, his body void of energy, much like his voice. "I'm tired Ddraig. I sleep so much lately, but I never get any rest."

"I know partner, but for once you're not going to find a solution to this problem by yourself. You know this. You have to open yourself up to others. You were never meant to be alone. Your nature won't let you. Maybe it's time to call the bearer of Siren Harmony. She can always get you to sleep."

"I can't. Nee-chan's done so much for me already, and she really busy these days. I won't bother her anymore. I won't."

"It's that type of thinking that got you in this state in the first place. It's ok to ask others for help sometimes."

"Not when they have more important things and close people to get back to. I'm just some crazy human nut living with his mother surrounded by nobles and leaders and Gods that happens to have a couple of insanely powerful monsters in him. If it weren't for you and Ghost, I wouldn't even be noticed. I'm not worth their time."

Ddraig grunted in frustration, knowing that he had hit a dead end. Issei had always been reluctant to ask others for help ever since that accident with Baraquiel, but it devolved into an extreme inferiority complex during the incident. It was only due to his short temper, pride, and sharp tongue that most people didn't see it, but nearly everyone that had known the boy since the beginning knew it for what it was.

Time to use some cheap shots.

Sometimes the best way to fight trauma was with more trauma. Luckily, trauma was something Issei was never in short supply of.

"If that's the case, then you shouldn't mind letting Tiamat know you're up and about again."

The reaction was instant in the form of a girlish squeak and Issei jumping into the nearest bush he could find. It soon was shaking uncontrollably. "Tia?! Where?! Where is she?! Don't let her find me! There are safer, faster, and more humane ways to die than her! Like acid! Or cancer!"

"You really need to get over your fear of her. Tiamat may be a Dragon King, but you've stood against stronger entities without hesitation or caring."

"I want to die with my dick intact thank you very much! I might be in good shape, but I am not submitting myself to the libido of a dragoness that hasn't gotten any real action for a millennia! Just because you have forgotten what it's like to reach the natural euphoria that all living beings experience from intercourse, doesn't mean that the other major dragons that haven't gotten themselves killed or stuck in sacred gears have!"

Ddraig rolled his eyes from inside his container. While Tiamat may have been rather, enthusiastic, the last time she had been around Issei, he didn't think it warranted this extreme of a reaction from the boy. "Fine. I won't bother with this topic again. You're such a whelp sometimes."

"She tried to jump me before I had even reached the beginning stages of puberty! There's being thirsty and then there's that crazy woman!"

"Yes yes. I know the story. I was there too. Far be it for me to remind you that you're the idiot that asked her to be in your harem before learning how your respective natures would cause her to react."

Heavens forbid that Issei remembered that he was technically engaged to her. He was traumatized enough as it was. Then again, no one could have anticipated that the normally composed and cool Chaos Karma Dragon to react as she did upon meeting the ten year old Issei. The poor, poor unknowing fool.

The true natures of individual dragons really was a peculiar thing at times…

No. Best not delve too deeply into that minefield.

"Let's just deal with whoever is in the church already and be done with this. You should already have an idea of who is inside and how to deal with them with that nose of yours. Try not to crash into any more doors while you're at it this time."

"Yeah yeah. Laugh it up. Asshole." Issei got out of the bush and brushed off his clothes, the crimson gauntlet on his left arm vanishing as he did so.

A quick sniff of the air told him all he needed to know. Tons of rosemary, but not enough to drown out the pungent mixed scents that feathers give off. There were at least two Fallen and a good number of Church related individuals using the building. Probably excommunicated exorcists.

What he didn't smell though was power. Meaning he was dealing with low rankers.

Good. They tended to overthink and get nervous quickly when up against someone they didn't know.

Without any care to his personal appearance or safety, the teen jumped over the gates with a little magic, walked straight up to the main building, pushed open the doors, and sauntered inside as if nothing was wrong with what he was doing.

He didn't see anyone inside the chapel to meet him as he walked up the center. For all intents and purposes, the place was barren.

Pausing in the middle of the room, he lazily looked up and around for a few seconds in dead silence.

"I know you're there. You can come out."

The building was still quiet, his accusation was met with no response.

"Really? You're seriously going with that overused, you know what, fine. Asia Argentio."

Three spears of corrupted holy light shot past him from various angles, missing him by mere inches.

"Very nice guys. Real classy."

It was annoyingly ironic in hindsight. Issei couldn't stand large crowds and being touched, but he wasn't bothered in the slightest when around Ophis or being nearly skewered or being naked in public. His priorities and standards really were screwed up.

As if on cue, the sounds of massive flapping wings reverberated throughout the room as three Fallen descended slowly from the rafters. Their ebony black wings seemed to drown out all light in the area despite it being early afternoon.

He wasn't impressed. Azazel did it better by himself.

Stupid grandstanding. It was something that most of the members of the three Factions did so often that they had beaten the concept into the ground.

"Well now. Isn't this a surprise?" The only male of the three Fallen droned, clearly trying to look intimidating. "Issei Hyoudou. I certainly didn't expect a shut in like you to be here."

If Dohnaseek expected to earn points by showing off that he knew Issei's name and habits, he was doomed for disappointment. "On the other hand, finding you in a dump like this is to be expected considering how often you've been getting the Cougar's blood alcohol level so high it's become flammable for the past three weeks. Level with me. How much can she down? I need to know her limits and just how bad her withdrawal is going to hit once you guys bail town and she's cut off from the tap."

"Hahaha. Raynare was right. You really don't hold back. Such a cruel and vicious tongue you have. I wonder if it will still wiggle so energetically when I cut it out of your mouth." The blonde Lolita that looked no older than thirteen standing to Issei's right giggled in amusement, though the glint in her eyes betrayed something else.

Issei wasn't fooled. There were three real reasons why a Fallen out on the field would look that young. Either they were a young scrub learning the ropes, one that specialized in infiltration and preyed on those that looked young, or, in a worst case scenario...

"Thanks for the compliment, old hag."

… The Fallen was born during an era where mankind's lifespan was notoriously short, resulting in the ideal standards for beauty and youth in young women being clocked at roughly the early throes of puberty. Most Fallen that specialized in seduction tended to change with the times to maximize their efficiency, however every now and then there was a member or two that refused to change their appearance and stick with what they had.

Bottom line, there was a good chance that the now infuriated woman to his side had at least four wings and maybe half a millennia of field experience. She might have shown only two as she came from the rafters, but it wasn't hard to hide extra sets of wings so long as the owner wasn't doing anything extensive. For all he knew, she was the true leader of the group.

"What did you say brat?!"

Nope. Definitely not the leader. Way too quick to trigger if it only took that much to have her ready to use unholy magic on him. Just a long lived scrub.

"Mitlett. Calm down." Dohnaseek chided his companion, never taking his eyes off of Issei. "You're either incredibly confident or foolish to come here by yourself, human. Either way, you would not have come here without reason."

Huh. So the Cougar slipped his name, but never told these scrubs that he was the Sekiryutei. He underestimated her. "I do plenty of things without reason, Hat Man. Half the things the three factions do doesn't make any sense as far as I'm concerned. I'm just going along with it most of the time."

"Hat Man?" The third Fallen to Issei's right skeptically echoed. She was an incredibly busty and beautiful woman appearing to be in her late twenties with long blue hair wearing a buttoned up suit that was open to give him a full view of her cleavage.

Hold on… he knew those oppai and absolute cleavage.

"Are, are you, Sparkle Swallows?"

The muted church grew even more silent.

"… I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Sparkle Swallows. Upper B ranked Actress for Zaz' porn company, Black Light productions. Starred in Revenge of the Tentacles, the My Unholy Teacher series, and C. . Co-starred in-"

"Stop!" Kalawarner shouted, her face growing progressively more crimson the longer Issei listed out the flicks she apparently starred in.

"I fucking knew I saw those oppai before!" The teen shouted in proud victory.

"Really? That's how you recognized her? By her tits?" Mitlett deadpanned.

"You little creep! I'm not Sparkle Swallows or whoever that person is! How would you even know what those are?! Azazel-sama's porn companies sell only to non-human customers!"

Click click. Click click.

"I get paid to review them." Issei innocently answered as if it was the simplest thing in the world, at some point pulling out his cell phone and taking pictures of the distraught woman. "I'm a professional porno critic. Twenty thousand yen for every quality budget film. Two hundred for every feature length film. You might have heard of me. My pen name is Chibi Sensei."

"Two hundred thousand? To review and watch porn?" Mitlett blinked, not sure if she should trust her ears.

"Chibi Sensei? Little Doct… IT WAS YOU!" Surprising her compatriots, Kalawarner materialized a spear of light and got ready to hurl it at Issei.

"Kal! Calm down! What the hell is going on!?" Dohnaseek shouted, completely confused as to what was happening.

"That little shit destroyed what little career I had! One review and any bonuses and credit I had in the industry went down the toilet! This fucker ruined it with one hand on the keyboard and the other on his half sized dick!"

"I don't masturbate." Issei muttered, clearly not even paying attention to what he was saying and more on Kalawarner's breasts if the angle he was holding his phone was any indication.

"Die creep! Scum! Forgotten abandoned gnat! Stop taking pictures of me!" Her temper didn't improve as she used one hand to cover herself and the other to throw some spears at Issei.

She might as well have done nothing as the boy swayed left and right, barely dodging the attacks by the smallest of margins while still holding his phone up. At best, her attacks managed to disrupt the photos via the dust kicked up when her spears totaled the benches next to and behind the teen.

"Oi. Move your hands. I haven't seen your oppai in years. I need an update on your development. You have clearly gotten some coloring since your time in the shots. It's cleared up your complexion some, but at the cost of your fashion sense. That dress of yours is made of what, cheap pleather? That's just embarrassing. At least put some effort into your looks."

Clearly the woman had forgotten that she had been denying the fact that she had worked in the industry at all just moments before.

He dodged Kal's attacks so casually… spears made by unholy energy aren't linear. The shafts are irregularly shaped and thorned along their lengths. Simply trying to lean out of the way of a normal level spear isn't something most higher level entities would risk if they didn't expect to at least be scratched. The precision and judgement required is too difficult to grasp in time for most, let alone a human. It's safer to just jump out of the way or throw up a shield. This kid… he really isn't normal.

Dohnaseek glanced at Mitlett and gave her a questioning look, and received one of mixed confusion and concern as a response. She had clearly noticed the irregularity as well, and was now no longer as confident as she had been before.

They were snapped out of their silent conversation by a very not silent Issei.

"Useless reviews my ass! I am revered as the maker and breaker of the porn world and you will bow before my word as though I were a God! I stand by what I said lady! You moan like a fucking cow having a hernia when you orgasm! The harder you go off, the deeper you are! There's sexy, and then there's just that creepy backwoods barnyard shit that you pull! Ooooh! Oooooh! Oooooooooooooooh! You want a career? Get a gag and a director that knows what the hell taste is for your next shot! That or inhale a tank of helium before the next time you want to film yourself getting off!"

Mitlett tried to keep a straight face, she really did.

The problem was that Issei's imitation of her comrade's orgasm moaning was far more accurate than she would ever admit. It wasn't uncommon for Fallen to relieve stress every now and then, but after a few weeks, they had had to learn stronger sound cancelling spells to block out the woman's moans when she was going solo. It wasn't that she was loud, but the woman's impressive lungs and deep pitch actually travelled through the damn walls when she was hitting it hard.

"I'm going to kill you brat! Do you know how much money you cost me or how hard it is for a two winged Fallen to get a decent paying job that isn't on the field if you don't specialize in Sacred Gear tinkering?!" The Fallen was borderline hysterical now as multiple spears hovered over her.

"Bring it, Udders! I'll slap the truth into that cow head of yours and then your cow tits for good measure!" Issei didn't register Ddraig groining inside of him as the boy began to manifest some magic and reinforce his body.

"ENOUGH! BOTH OF YOU!" Dohnaseek apparently reached the limit of his patience as he rose his voice above both of the would-be combatants. "YOU WANT TO KILL ONE ANOTHER?! DO IT LATER!"

Mitlett simply stood to the side of everyone, watching with a completely confused expression. "What just happened?"

o. o. o.

Issei sat on one of the dusty benches that littered the nave of the church as if he had nothing better to do. In front of him by the podium, the three Fallen stood, each giving him mixed glares. At the very least though, they had all managed to calm down some.

"Do you three know how deep shit you're in right now?" Issei started the conversation off heavy.

"You make it sound as if you have any authority over us." Kalawarner sneered.

"Did any of you actually do any research when the Devil that hired you to kidnap the clueless Ninja Puppy sent you here?" Issei pressed on, ignoring her comment. "Did any of you think for a single moment that you might be walking into a set up?"

"Ninja Puppy?" Mitlett echoed, clearly not understanding what he was talking about. "Wait, how did he know about the-?"

"He means Argentio. And obviously he talked to someone from the Church after he found her." Dohnaseek cut her off. "To answer your question, I did do research. I'm not so foolish as to trust a Devil at his word, regardless of the deal. This land is Devil territory, and while it was discouraged to come here, it was never forbidden, and nothing of interest was ever actually here. Or at least, acknowledged to be here."

Issei gave him the benefit of the doubt there. Too much security could be just as bad as too little at times. Azazel did his job a bit too well in this case. "Let me break things down. You three are dangerously close to finding something that a good number of very powerful people don't want known. Close enough, that if you don't ensure that you vanish soon, you will vanish another way."

"You seem quite certain of this." Mitlett mused.

"I am also quite certain that the town will be inspected by the Mirren by this time tomorrow."

That had the Fallen on edge. The Grigori were known as "The Watchers", even before they fell. However, what few knew was that there was a subsection of their kin that answered only to the upper ranks. The Mirren, the Patient, "Those that Waited". While most people thought that Devils and Fallen played dirty by nature, they did not even come close to what the Mirren were capable of.

Naturally, the three in front of Issei were not of that caliber.

"When I came across the Nun earlier, completely by chance I assure you, I was obviously annoyed. What was a member of the Church doing here? Kuoh was off limits, and all the leaders of the three Factions knew better than to just let random members of their groups come and go here as they pleased. So, I called my contact in Heaven, and he told me some rather interesting things regarding her. Involving, but not limited to, a Devil sneaking into a high security Church compound in Italy. Things that, when combined with the fact that our person in question has clearly gone through quite a unique experience, has both of us understandably on edge and irritable."

"Why the suspicion?" Dohnaseek shrugged, brushing off the teen's cold stare. "Like you said, this is Devil territory. Why not ask the ones here about the issue and see if they're related."

Issei rolled his eyes. "Right. Because clearly the intelligent thing to do if a Devil wanted to kidnap someone and stay out of trouble is to bring them to a place that everyone knows belongs to a you or your group in particular. The ones here do have many glaring deficits, but they aren't that oblivious. Most of them anyways."

"You seem quite familiar with the Devils here, but you have connections with Heaven, and enough pull in the Grigori to have Raynare be your attendant." Mitlett frowned, trying to piece together what she knew. "Just what or who are you?"

A brief glint of amusement flickered across Issei's dull eyes. "Careful. Ask any more questions like that, and I won't be willing to throw you the bone you need to get out of this."

The Fallen didn't like where the boy was going with that. "What do you mean?"

Issei shifted himself in his seat so his ass didn't cramp. The padding under his rear had long since eroded to nearly nothing. "I won't bore you with the details, but here is a summary of what is going to happen. By the end of the day, the Ninja Puppy's situation will be known by members of all three factions. Members that possess a good deal of influence that will also be very curious and interested as to who is responsible for bringing her here in the first place, and more importantly, why. And since there happens to be something else here in Kuoh that is being kept under wraps, many important people are going to think that there is a correlation between it, and your decision to come here. As for the Nun's situation there's nothing you or I can do about it now."

"If that's the case, then why did you come here?" Kalawarner materialized a spear in hand. "If you can't stop it, then there's no reason for us to kill you right here and now."

The teen's mouth flickered in brief amusement and slowly moved a hand from his pockets. "That is true, however you seem to have missed one fact. You see, everyone knows that someone is here that shouldn't be."

All three Fallen stiffened as they saw Issei hold up his phone in front of them, showing one of the pictures of Kalawarner he had just taken on the front in an email format with a "send" prompt under his thumb.

"They don't know that the accused party are you in particular. And if you play nice, they won't ever know."

"You little bastard." Mitlett couldn't believe that they had been played so easily.

"Hold on one moment." Dohnaseek frowned, the least visibly disturbed of the group. "The Mirren. The Church. You have no proof of any of this other than your word. You might as well be sending that photo to yourself for all we know. A bluff."

"Hmmm. I suppose that is true. There isn't much evidence I can give you. For all you know, I could simply have a good contact inside the Church that told me enough to make the correct conclusions. I mean I can call these guys up right now, but if I did, they'd obviously figure out something is wrong and end up finding out about you regardless of what I did." Issei droned, not at all worried about the furious look he was getting. "Then again… I'm curious as to just how much the Cougar has told you about me while you got her shitfaced."

"What are you getting at?"

"I'm just wondering if she told you how she first came to my place." Issei casually leaned back and waved his phone like a toy. "How Azazel came with her inside my home and we all had a nice dinner. He spent a lot of time catching up with my mother and at least tried to do the same with me. That doesn't sound like the sort of relationship that could be considered between that of mere acquaintances, does it? More like one between people that have known one another for some time, and are close enough to at least share phone numbers."

The odds of Issei making this up were slim. If he was lying, then then they could call him out on it, but only if they knew the truth… but there was no point in that as that would mean the boy had opened himself up for failure. If he was telling the truth though, it didn't matter if the Fallen knew it or not, because that would mean that the phone number at the tip of his thumb was very likely to be Azazel's.

Fortunately, and unfortunately for them, while Raynare hadn't told them everything about Issei, she did spill about her introduction.

Dohnaseek's angered expression was enough of an answer.

"Oh don't give me that. You're the idiots that are threatening to kill me." Issei rolled his eyes. "All of you grunts from the Three Factions are the same. You all put your superiors on the highest pedestals, screaming "sempai, notice me! Notice me!" Then you all do something stupid and shit yourselves at the very idea of having them do just that. Fucking mass kohai complex, the lot of you. It's embarrassing to watch every time I see it."

"Dohnaseek. Get him to the point before I stab the brat, Azazel-sama be damned." Mitlett ground out through her clenched teeth.

"You claim you aren't connected to the Biblical Factions, but you clearly have connections in high places." The defacto leader frowned. "That house of yours was protected by magic by all three groups. And that arm of yours is wrapped in a shroud made in Heaven. Clearly you're someone of interest that they want to keep safe."

"I'm an independent. I don't care about that pointless war you three are waging in the slightest. That doesn't exempt me from knowing a few people. I'm sure that other pantheons share similar relationships as mine." The teen scoffed. The Fallen's ploy to try and unnerve him by making that comment about his home fell flat. "And you made a slight misunderstanding."

"Hoh? A misunderstanding?" Dohnaseek flickered through what he had said and what he might have said that was incorrect, but couldn't come up with much. "I'm not sure what you mean by that."

Issei sighed, shaking his head and giving the Fallen a dry look. "You claimed that the protections on my home were there to keep me safe. An understandable, but incorrect assumption."

There was no killing intent. No threat. No spike in power or rage.

Issei simply smiled kindly. An action that was incredibly alien to the normally bitter and dour young man.

It was enough for all three non-humans' blood to turn cold by how unnaturally natural it felt. A lie so grand that it seemed to cause reality to curdle.

"The truth is, I don't need protection. I just like my privacy. The wards that the Maou, the Seraphs, and Azazel set up were merely a precaution to keep away those that might bother me, as I unfortunately possess a habit of killing people that can't take a hint and leave me alone. Fallen Angels that don't know how to do their jobs correctly for example."

Issei didn't seem to care or notice the effect he had on the other party as he continued. "Now then, imagine just what would have happened if someone that was part of the three Factions without the right connections and knowledge had found the Ninja Puppy here in Kuoh. Dead or alive, it doesn't matter either way. There no doubt would have been quite a commotion from the discovery. Investigations and inquiries as to who could have done it. People looking for clues. After all, why on earth was a kidnapped excommunicated Sacred Gear bearing Nun all the way in the only Japanese territory managed by the younger sisters of two Maou? Anybody would be quite interested in that. It wouldn't take much for someone to notice my home from a probing of that scale. And if that had happened… many people would not be happy in the end. And I am not a happy person to begin with."

Issei stood up, his cherubic smile nothing more than the matter of nightmares and contradictions. "So then. Let's rectify this little issue of ours, shall we? You do what I want. And I allow you to live. And no one will bother either of us afterwards."

o. o. o.

"Way to lay it on thick."

"Shut up. You know how grunts from the factions are. Unless you're radiating enough power to run a small country or spouting wings out of your ass, it's near impossible for them to take you seriously." Issei grumbled as he walked off the church grounds.

Without the Grigori, there was no real safe haven for any Fallen to go to. It was their home. Their family. And Azazel was their head.

So, threatening that connection, that lifeline, was the greatest and most terrifying thing one could do to a Fallen.

So long as Issei had the pictures on his phone, and Azazel's ear, the three Fallen were at his mercy. It had been made clear that if they, or the priests that they had under their employ went after Asia, or spread word about him to anyone, pictures would fly endlessly.

And so would they.

"Says the person that was so far into his method acting that he nearly did go and kill the Fallen on a whim."

"Who said it was acting? Udders dared question my reviewing judgement, and honestly, I wanted that guy's hat."

"You wanted his hat."

"It was classy. Sure I'd probably have to disinfect it a few dozen times, but that was a quality piece of headwear."

"When it comes to you, I'd say the same thing about a helmet."

"You're just jealous 'cause you can't wear hats and are missing out."

"I really should have intervened more when Ghost was giving you lessons. You always emulate his infuriating personality whenever you're satisfied with yourself."

Issei froze mid-step at Ddraig's comment.

Satisfied? Was he really that giddy from simply scaring the shit out of a bunch of grunts? Since when had he ever been so petty? That didn't sound like him, did it?

"Don't worry about it. It's only natural. The only people you've been able to vent on for the past five years are your mother and people that you actually knew and cared about that didn't deserve your anger. Those three stupid crows on the other hand are nothing to either of us. That overly sensitive conscience of yours has always been an annoying thing to deal with. This is just another example of it getting in the way."

"… That doesn't make sense. I didn't kill them, and they didn't tell us much that was useful." He had grilled all three of them. Asia. Kuoh. All their instructions had been supplied to them via an intermediary Devil with no notable qualities other than being a weak woman that was probably a reincarnated human. They didn't even know what the Devil wanted Asia for in the first place.

The only thing of note that he did find out was that the Fallen were planning to extract Asia's Sacred Gear before turning her body to their contractor soon afterwards. It was to be their payment.

He had nearly killed them then and there for that bit. How grunts like them managed to get their hands on a Sacred Gear extraction relic was beyond him. Azazel kept those things under intense scrutiny and supervision for a whole myriad of reasons that even Issei wouldn't joke about.

Still, it meant that whoever they were dealing with was a High Class Devil that was building a peerage. There was no reason for a Devil to have interest in a human corpse other than to reincarnate it, though the fact that they didn't care about the Sacred Gear was peculiar.

"Maybe it's simply because you helped someone for the first time in a while without making a huge commotion in the process. You've always been eager to please, but the way you are now limits the number of opportunities for that to happen." Ddraig suggested.

"Don't stretch it Ddraig. You make it sound like I'm no different from how I was five years ago. I'm not that idiot anymore." He didn't want to have this conversation again. He didn't want to remember what it was like to be happy. To be illusioned with the idea that people could care about him at least enough to put aside their personal interests to keep their words.

There were better and less painful things to do than that, like stabbing himself in the chest.

He took in a deep breath and sighed while withdrawing his cell phone. It was still a bright and beautiful day outside, meaning plenty of people were bound to be out. Worse, he was in a part of town he didn't recognize, which wasn't surprising. He would need the GPS on his phone in order to find his way back-

Low Power. Phone going to sleep mode. Please find charging outlet.

He stared blankly at the screen in his hand, his face a perfect neutral mask save for his twitching eyebrow.

Apparently he had forgotten to charge his phone last night before he had fallen asleep on his desk.

How the Fallen Angels didn't notice the flashing indicator that he was low on batteries while waving the damn thing in front of their faces during their conversation was something only a miracle could explain.

"Not the same idiot huh? I guess that means you're a completely different idiot now."

"Shut up!"

o. o. o.

Eight Years Ago:

"Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit."

Baraquiel fumbled through his pockets for the vial of Phoenix Tears that he always kept on him in case of an emergency while desperately trying to ignore the cold look that Ophis was giving him.

He had fucked up. He had fucked up so bad that even Azazel wouldn't laugh at this.

He couldn't blame Issei. The kid didn't know better. No. Rather, he didn't know better, and underestimated the boy.

The moment the Sekiryutei had appeared inside his guard and reached for him, all of Baraquiel's instincts and reflexes took hold.

Danger they screamed.

Don't let him touch you the warnings blared.

Before his mind processed these signals, his body reacted.

The end result was the unconscious boy lying on the ground, with his chest kicked in so hard most of his ribs were broken, blood leaking from his mouth, and his back torn apart from the deep gouge his body had made in the earth.

All in front of Ophis.

This is not what he had intended on the first day of lessons.

"Come on. Don't die on me kid. You're the Sekiryutei. You're stronger than this." The Fallen found the vial and wasted no time cracking it open over the boy, letting the drops of valuable fluids fall on him, rejuvenating him at a blinding speed. He'd have to get more later, which was painful to think about. Phoenix Tears were not easy to get your hands on. Especially if you were not a Devil.

"Hooh? Isn't that interesting? It sure works fast. What was that stuff? Max Elixer? Phoenix Down? Jizz from a God of Life?"

Baraquiel froze. The voice speaking was not his, Ddraig's, Issei's, or Ophis'. More concerning was that it was coming right in front of him… from the boy's right arm. From the black gauntlet encasing it.

"Grandpa. I thought you didn't want to show yourself yet." Ophis leaned over the large man's side, a place she had not been anywhere near moments before. Baraquiel tried to shove away the possible reasons why she had been there in the first…

… Wait. Grandpa?

"Eh. Considering how things turned out, it's more a bother to keep on hiding than not." The stranger inside the unknown Sacred Gear yawned. "I did warn Issei not to surprise you right off the bat, but you know how kids are. Sometimes the best lessons they can get are a solid ass beating for doing something stupid. Still, this was a bit overkill. He's just a brat for fucks sake. There was no need to nearly literally punt him in half."

"I. Well. It was an accident." Baraquiel fumbled over his words, not sure exactly what was going on. "I'm sorry, but, who are you exactly?"

"He's Grandpa." Ophis stated as if it answered everything.

"He's an annoying ass." Ddraig grumbled.

"My name's Ghost, and I'm in this kid because I'm an idiot with terrible luck and worse judgment making skills." The stranger shamelessly declared. "Before you ask. No. I'm not Ophis' Grandpa. She just calls me that because… I do things, and reasons."

"And you spend lots of time with Grandma." Ophis added.

"And that." He relented.

"Grandma?" Baraquiel was pretty certain that his voice didn't squeak. Sure enough that he would deny anyone that asked him if he did.

"Don't ask. Bottom line though is that I'm only temporarily stuck in this kid. Unlike Ddraig here, I'm not an integrated or vital part of your system. When the kid dies, I'm out to do my thing again. Until then, I'm stuck in this improvised Sacred Gear thing that your God made. FYI, we call this thing I'm in Blind Eternity."

"I, see." Baraquiel hedged, not trusting himself to talk any more than that for the time being. "And you're fine with this? Being stuck in a child?"

"Not the dumbest thing I've ever done. Or the worst. I'm immortal. A century or two of doing nothing isn't going to make me freak out." Ghost waved away his status as if it was no big deal. "That being said, I have grown somewhat attached to the little nutjob with a penis for a brain. He's got potential, he's funny as hell when he loses his temper, and he's got a good drive. He's someone worth investing some time in watching and teaching."

"I'm glad you're happy with your current situation then. Not many would be."

"Yes. But you misunderstand me, Baraquiel. While I don't mind wasting time every now and then, I do mind lost investments." Ghost's friendly tone suddenly bore an ice cold wind to it. A chill that would travel down the spines of all that heard it. "Like I said. I've grown attached to the kid, and I would be rather, annoyed, if something particularly unfortunate were to happen to him. I have been around more than long enough to know that large organizations like yours have a tendency of getting ahead of yourselves, from time to time. I'm just letting you know that it is in everyone's best interest if such, accidents, did not take place when it comes to my amusing host."

The man with ten black wings frowned. He was used to threats, but rarely did it come from the Sacred Gears themselves. "The Grigori are not a force that is easily disregarded. Neither are Heaven or the Devils. All of us possess members that are capable of wiping out entire countries by ourselves. What makes you think that you alone can do anything to us?"

Ghost laughed at Baraquiel's rebuttal. An amused chuckle that an old man would give a child that did not know any better. "Hmhm. What makes me think that? Let me answer your question with another one. What reasons can you think of that can explains why Ophis-chan calls me Grandpa? I assure you, it's not because I asked her to."

The pallor on the man's face slowly lost color as Ghost's words finally registered to him.

"Grandpa. That reminds me. When you get out, can you finally help me kick Baka-Red out of the Dimensional Gap? After that, can you help clean away his stench?" Ophis had moved to where Issei was during their conversation, and was innocently poking the black and white jewel as if to grab Ghost's attention.

"We'll see Ophis-chan. Remember the reason why one of you two has to be there in the first place. Baka-Red-chan may be a headstrong fool, but he does do his job. He even stopped me on my way coming here the instant I showed up, the silly child. It would be a bad thing if we messed things up too much getting you back home. And because I've been here for so long, things might get even more interesting down the road. You might have to share, or else whoever gets the gap in the end will be swamped with work. It's a bit hard to achieve [silence] when people keep on interrupting it, don't you think?"

Ophis didn't pout, but Baraquiel was certain that the displeased glare she was giving was the closest thing she'd come to one. "Fine."

By the ghost of the Heavenly Father, what had he gotten himself into? "Fine. I get it. You've made your point. You're dangerous and the kid is off limits to anything extreme. I'll forward the message to Azazel, but don't be surprised if he wants to talk to you before anything is finalized."

"That's fine. I expected as much. Considering how badly you all are bending over backwards for Ophis, it's only natural that the higher ups would want to add their personal touch to things to make sure everything's all fine and dandy." One could practically hear Ghost smiling from inside Issei. "Now that we got the boring topics out of the way, we can get onto the more important subjects."

Baraquiel swallowed heavily. "Such as?"

Issei's black gauntlet glowed menacingly. "… Do you actually know why the large breasts of the non-human women here don't follow the conventional laws of physics?"

"… Eh?"

"Uuuungh. Not this again."

"Grandpa. You're being weird again."

"Don't look at me like that damn you! I've been stuck in here for two years! Two years of blue balls! Two years of listening and being there for the kid while he sneaks off to watch and study porn on the internet as if it was his lifeline! Do you know how cruel and twisted this setup is?! A man has needs! I can't even pump one out here to pass the damn time because I'd more or less be creaming the inside of a nine year old boy! Sure, I have stuck my dick into tons of questionable places over the years, but even I have moral limits damn it!"

"… Eh?" Baraquiel repeated himself, not exactly sure how he found himself in his current situation. Was this a result of the new Sacred Gear?

"I mean, it was funny at first. The kid was obsessed with getting a harem before I even met him, so why not teach him a few things? A few porn tips here. Some training and advice there. See him screw up a bit. But how the hell was I supposed to know he'd take to everything like a sponge or that he'd be this dedicated? Next thing I knew, he was blasting through every sort of show there was, taking notes on the actors and their histories, and trying to categorize how long it took for them to reach orgasms depending on how much foreplay and how many partners they were with! He's killing my drive and enjoyment of the art! I need something stupid and sexy to focus my head on that the brat can't ruin for me!" Ghost didn't seem to notice the confusion he was making now, too focused on his ranting and venting to anyone that would listen.

"And how would learning something so stupid not ruin it for you?" Ddraig asked warily.

"Easy. After learning how it works, I'd tell the kid all the crazy stuff he might or might not be able to do with non-human breasts and try and get him to do it himself for shits and giggles. Trickshots, maybe a Rube Goldberg device consisting of nothing but oppai related shenanigans. And maybe make a few Youtube videos in the process for a few extra bucks… wait. No. Youtube would take down the vids. It would have to be Pornhub. It's always best to generate passive income early on. Ah. Wait. Best to start working on merchandizing and sponsorships too. Maybe some guest appearances to spread word and increase the view base. Also have to find a good source of flapjacks and cigars for the company parties… wait. Shit! This is Japan! Where the hell am I going to find quality flapjacks in Japan?!"

"Of course that is the biggest roadblock to your plans." From the sound of things, this sort of monologue wasn't that unusual for the stranger stuck in a Sacred Gear.

"I will make it a thing! And profit off of it! And then I will hide away the money so my asshole brother won't take away this time!"

"I'm, I'm just going to bring Issei home now." Baraquiel moved on autopilot. He didn't want to think right now. His head hurt too much. What had just happened? Why was he so confused?

"Don't think about it too much Baraquiel. I learned that years ago. If you think Issei is bad, you'll never be able to tolerate this one. Take it from the guy that's stuck with these two." Ddraig apologized in his own way. Baraquiel doubted that he, or anyone else had ever heard the Heavenly Red Dragon sound so defeated and demotivated before.

"Hmm. My condolences." As he carried Issei's body home, somewhere in his numbed mind, he wondered if he would be able to maintain his recently acquired peaceful lifestyle after this, if he could load the boy off on Azazel, and if he'd be able to get out of this situation without any significant trouble.

He would find out eventually that the answer to all those questions, unfortunately, was no.

o. o. o.

Omake: Things better left forgotten.

Issei sighed as he sat down at his workbench. The day was just exhausting and took forever. He needed to take his mind off things while he had some time to himself.

He had gotten through his quota of Porn reviews for the week, but there were still a few custom dildo orders that he had to fulfil. Both for humans and non-humans. It was generally pretty easy to tell which one was which most of the time. The vast majority of human women weren't able to handle some of the crazy shit that the non-humans enjoyed, and the point of ordering customized dildos in the first place was to scratch a peculiar itch that conventional models couldn't scratch in one way or another.

Hard plastic. Soft plastic. Rotors of varying intensity. Customized molds. Bumps. Ridges. Curcumsized or not. Human. Horse. Dog. Shark (Took him forever to find a useable model for that one). Metal rings. Vibrating. Beads. Balls. Eggs. Clamps. Chains. Remote. Extending. Inflating. Widening. Gag. Harness. Double ended. Piercings. Ejaculating. Temperature controlled.

There wasn't a customization that he didn't do for the right price… so long as the one doing the ordering signed a waver that he was not responsible for any incidents or injuries that could come from their use.

"Oh. Going down the list for the week." Issei picked up a clipboard, comparing what was written down with what was in front of him. "Done. Done. Done. Due next week. Done. Do… huh."

He frowned, scanning the space in front of him for the product on the list, but he didn't see it. Further inspection of the room and the floor also proved fruitless. It wasn't still in a mold. It wasn't on the floor, under the desk, or anywhere else that he'd leave it. He was rather careful and meticulous with his work, so there wasn't a high chance that he'd leave it anywhere else in the ro-

"Mmmmmm!"

Issei paused as the house reverberated in tune to the moans of a female.

Originating from a room to his right.

"MMMMMMMMMM!"

The guest room that Raynare was staying in was to his left.

"… It looks like I never got started on this one after all." The teen's glazed eyes stared at nothing in particular as he mechanically moved to his bench and got straight to work.

Issei was a terrible liar.