Chapter 11

Gerald stumbled down the sidewalk outside the bar and braced himself against the walls of surrounding buildings. His legs gave out. He tried to pull himself up and fell on his face instead. He crawled into a nearby alleyway and sat.That woman Drean liked looked like someone I've seen before."Someone that I raped, someone that I killed. But I'm different now!" Gerald sobbed, lost in a mix of alcohol and delirium. He startled a young couple that had walked by. "Pretty girl you got there," he said to the young man. "You better treat her real nice. Otherwise she might get away from you someday."The young man did not know what to think of this and took his remark as a threat. He lifted a hand to strike Gerald's face."No, honey." His girlfriend held him back. "Leave him. He's drunk off his ass."The couple walked away. Gerald coughed and wheezed. He wiped blood from his mouth. Sharp pain quaked in his chest. His lungs constricted, and he could not draw breath.Gerald looked around the corner and saw the happy couple down the sidewalk. He focused on the man: tall, athletic and handsome. He had to make a decision: live or perish forever.Gerald released his spirit. He penetrated his target and fought against the human's soul. Gerald possessed him easily. The human's body convulsed and fell to the ground.Gerald instantly knew everything about the human: his friends, his favorite places to eat, his fears and his pleasures. He also knew Kristi, the girl with him."Oh my God! Lawrence, are you okay?" His new girlfriend shook him."Yes cutie, I'm fine," Gerald answered. He stood and dusted himself off. He turned to his old host, expecting a dead body and instead saw the real Gerald staring at him with quiet fury in his eyes from where he sat.The fallen angel knew the human could not rise, but he saw the fight in his eyes: he respected him for his bravery.The human known as Gerald drew his last breath and slumped over. The fallen angel took a moment to pray for his soul. He wished the best for him and wished he hadn't brought the worst to his life.This man's name is Lawrence? I think I'll stick with Gerald. I can't give the man his life back, but I can try to bring honor to his name. This kid's memories of this chick are filled with intense pleasure. She's a little thin for my taste, but it will be nice to feel wanted."So you put out pretty well, do you?" Gerald looked over her. She wore a pink tube top and skinny jeans."Only for you, you know that..." Kristi pushed back her blond curls from her eyes and scrutinized Gerald. "Are you sure you're okay?""Yeah, never been better, Kristi. So we were headed back to my place for a little fun, right?""Yeah, are you sure you're feeling alright?""Yes, sweetie. Don't worry about me. We were having a great night before now. Let's just keep it up like nothing happened."Gerald searched his body's memories to see whether or not he owned a car.A brand new Mustang GT. Never driven one before, but judging from his memories of speeding tickets I think I'll enjoy it.Gerald smiled as they walked up to the recently waxed, black Mustang.He unlocked the doors remotely and opened the door for his girlfriend."Mmm, black leather interior. The wood trim is nice too," he muttered."What did you say, honey?""I was just checkin' you out, babe," he said. "The fact is, all other women are inferior.""Aww.""So we were headed for my place before that drunk ruined our night, huh?"He tried to imitate his host's natural behaviors. "Hobo bastard, should get a job or something.""Well, I wouldn't say he ruined anything. I felt sorry for him actually." She glanced back. "I thought I saw blood running down his face.""He probably just hit his head when he fell.""I think we should go back and help him."Gerald did not answer her and seemed calm on the surface as he drove.Visions of his first possession raked against his conscience. His first woman had been much more beautiful than this one: full figured, dark hair, dark eyes and fair skin.I can't do this again.Gerald slammed on the brakes. He got out of the car, opened the passenger side door, gently stood Kristi on the street and drove off while her disbelief held her in thrall.Seconds later his host's cell phone rang. He crushed it and threw it out the window."I won't let that happen again," Gerald said. "I've changed. Never again. Time to check out my new place. It shouldn't be much further away." Gerald grinned and accelerated.The engine roared in response, and his car streaked down the lamp lit street. Dark clouds had curtained the sky while Gerald had been in the bar. They obscured the stars and moon.He slowed down and made a right turn."Should be at the end of this street."I can't believe I took this guy's body. I wonder if God is disappointed. Gerald twisted his hands around the leather of the steering wheel. God has to know all I want now is to be back in Heaven and redeem myself. Surely he won't get pissed just because I stole this guy's body. I had to do it. My job wasn't complete. I have to do what I have to do to survive. Then again if I died maybe it would just end everything.Gerald considered this and didn't bother to slow down for the red light in front of him. He drove through a gap in traffic.I would cease to exist. I feel like I've lived long enough. Yes. I've hurt too many. I don't deserve redemption. I was meant to steal this guy's body so I could realize that. I can see that now.Gerald floored it. He was getting close to his apartment now.110, 120, 140 miles per hour.As he neared the building he thought about Drean. His new, sober, body recalled the woman from the bar clearly and Gerald remembered where he had seen her.That skia from the alley... Drean's in danger!Gerald tried the brakes, but it was not enough. He pulled the emergency brake. His car flipped, bounced and crashed into cars parked along the curb before smashing through the wall of the apartment building.Gerald felt his spirit fade: a sense of satisfaction mingled with a stabbing cold.Warmth consumed him.Let me die! I placed him in jeopardy! I can't help him. I never could, Gerald thought.No. You deserve to live with all the suffering you have so selfishly inflicted. And so you shall, God said. You may not believe in yourself, but I know what you are capable of. Live now with the new life I give to you. Live, and through Drean you may find yourself worthy of peace.God's warmth filled him to the brim and scorched within him like he had consumed gallons of molten metal. His consciousness wavered and sank into his memories.* * *A battered fallen angel hurtled from the heavens. He groaned and cried out. The war had wounded his body beyond repair, and his wings were useless. He could hear his brothers' woeful cries all around him, and it took great effort to lift his head so he could see them. Other angels filled the sky around him: some flew and some fell.I am glad I am not alone, but we will probably never see Heaven again. We are on our own.He covered himself with his arms and legs and tucked his black wings behind him in an attempt to save himself from the coming impact. He clipped the corner of a skyscraper. Concrete, metal and glass flew in all directions. He crashed through several feet of asphalt before halting. Death's welcoming cold crept over him.He removed his body from the physical realm and entered the spiritual. As an ethereal, he could no longer see buildings or any other physical objects.Souls of humans could be readily seen. Some were almost white, some were gray and some were dark with indelible marks of sin. He saw something fascinating: two souls mingled with one another. For a moment the angel hesitated but only for a moment.He attacked one of the souls, purged the consciousness of the former owner and claimed himself. He felt pleasure then: intense euphoria unlike anything he had ever felt. The ecstasy ended, and he lay limp, stupefied by the experience."Was it that good, dear?" The woman on him gasped for breath. She kissed his lips, and his body yearned for more.The woman looked upon his readiness and smiled."Ready for more already, honey?"She groaned and gripped her stomach."What's happening to me?!" she choked out.Her skin reddened and bat-like wings protruded from her body. Her stomach swelled and bulged. She fell backwards onto the bed, shook violently and lay still.The angel got up from the bed and looked at the woman.She changed into a demon. I don't understand.Then the angel realized he had a name."My name is Gerald."He laughed."This life is now mine."Memories from his former host overwhelmed his thoughts and left intense emotion in their wake. He felt real love for the woman in front of him, Teri. Memories of his host's, no his relationship with her, entered his mind.They had sacrificed so much to be where they were: the respect of family, friends, their jobs, their entire pasts and the security it all brought them. Their life had been meager in comparison but they had each other. He hated himself for erasing that. He had killed his love and killed himself. It was like killing an angel. He regretted following Lucifer and cried for the first time."The war was never worth it," he yelled. "It was never worth it if this was the goal."He heard a whimper. He turned to look. A blood covered baby girl lay there. Her dark eyes shone in the dark. She had transparent wings on her back."What is this?" Gerald searched his memory. "A human child? No, an angel child? How did this happen? I can't keep her..."Gerald picked her up, and she screeched.A mirror broke behind him and the apartment's window shattered. He dropped her and held his ears.When the child quieted, Gerald tried to find her. She had disappeared.He wiped his eyes.I can't let what I have done stand in the way of what could be. If this is how I must live to remain alive, so be it.He walked out the door of the room and into the new world that awaited him.