39. Chapter 39

MAYA’S POV

-How kind?! - Carina's voice came out high and a little high-pitched, a tone of voice that I only heard when she was completely outraged, and I mean that in the sense of "putting milk in the espresso" outraged.

My girlfriend slammed the door hard, and a shiver immediately ran down my spine - the body remembers - and I gripped the T-shirt that was still in my hand tighter as a way to stay focused on the present when all my mind wanted was to take me back to the past, to the sinister context in which doors were slammed while I was growing up.

-Who is that woman, Maya? - Carina asked, crossing her arms, with a deep crease between her eyebrows, the words coming out through her teeth and her face definitely turning redder.

-Uh... Adrienne? - I creased my forehead in confusion; Carina was there when she introduced herself. - What's all this about?

-Oh, I don't know, maybe it's about the way she was looking at you like she was trying to take pieces of you? - Her voice was definitely louder and now I was starting to understand what was really going on.

-She wasn't Carina, she was probably just uncomfortable with the fact that I was shirtless and nothing more than...

-Oh, there's that too! - Carina interrupted me, her arms now spread at her sides. - How is it that you answer the door shirtless? Don't you have any respect for me?

-How does me answering the door shirtless have anything to do with the respect I have for you, Carina? - I asked back, and now there was a little bit of anger mixed into my words as well because I was pretty sure that I was being accused of something at that moment.

-Sei stata del tutto inappropriata ad aprire la porta a torso nudo! E il modo in cui mi hai presentato? "Oh, questa è Carina"? Perché non mi hai presentato come la tua ragazza? È qualcosa che non vuoi che sappia? - You were completely inappropriate answering the door shirtless! And the way you introduced me? "Oh, this is Carina"? Why didn't you introduce me as your girlfriend? Is that something you don't want her to know? - Italian flew out of her mouth and, somehow, I knew I was in big trouble when it happened.

Carina never used Italian, except when she was too frustrated to even think in English.

-Okay, I'm sorry I opened the door shirtless, maybe I should have thought of that before, I just thought it was your brother, or Andy, or one of our friends, I didn't realize it was a complete stranger! But I think it is more than clear that you are my girlfriend, Carina! She said she saw us moving in yesterday, she has to be completely clueless not to realize that you are my girlfriend! - I tried to argue, but Carina rolled her eyes at me and walked past me towards the living room, I followed her because I knew that was what I needed to do. - She was just trying to be nice by bringing croissants to welcome us to the neighborhood.

-Oh, yes, of course! Of course, she was just trying to be nice while flirting with you! - Carina snorted, still walking over to the coffee table we had set up in front of the couch earlier to grab her tablet.

-She wasn't... - I tried to speak but was once again interrupted.

-Are you really going to try to convince me that she wasn't flirting with you, Maya? You're not talking to a stupid person! - Carina shouted and I immediately froze in the place where I was standing, paralyzed by the sudden anxiety that gripped my chest and suddenly my hands were sweating, and my heart was racing in my chest.

-I know. - I whispered, and for a second, I thought Carina hadn't heard, but Carina's ironic snort made it clear that she had heard my words. My chest felt much tighter now, and I tried to control my breathing so that I could continue speaking. - I think... I think I'd better go to bed; I have a 24-hour shift tomorrow, we can talk after we both take some time to cool our heads.

-I'm working late. - Carina spoke dryly as she sat down on the couch, her eyes already fixed on the tablet in her hands as she clicked on the app that connected her to her patients' charts.

-Okay. - I whispered again and went to her, only now realizing that the croissant platter was still in one of my hands. I went to Carina even though I was fearing her rejection and stroked her hair before placing a kiss on the top of her head. - Good night.

-Good night. - She murmured back.

I left the platter on the kitchen island and the croissants now no longer looked so appetizing; I hurried upstairs to the bedroom next, putting on the shirt that was still in my hand as I climbed the stairs and as soon as I entered the bedroom, I threw myself on the bed and crawled under the covers.

I was cold.

My body was bubbling with anxiety, my palms were still sweaty, and my feet were cold, my mouth was dry and I could hear the rapid beating of my heart against my ears. The feeling was suffocating, my chest hurt, and it was so tight that breathing took an absurd effort; I closed my eyes tightly and again tried to focus on my breathing.

So, Andrew was right, there would be yelling.

I knew that Carina hadn't meant to shout at me, she knew how sensitive I was to altered voices in the house, but the situation hadn't been any less distressing and I would certainly have to talk to her about it. I just hated that we were having our first fight a day after moving into our new home, after an amazing day like we had.

My heart seemed to slow down but thinking about Carina's accusations didn't allow my mind to slow down.

Was Adrienne really flirting with me?

It couldn't be. She didn't even have time to do something like that, Carina appeared five seconds after I opened the door, and I am absolutely sure that I had done absolutely nothing wrong.

Now that the anxiety had calmed down inside me, my eyelids grew heavier, and I closed my eyes knowing that the stubborn Italian downstairs wouldn't be coming to bed anytime soon.

You always think that you are a tough person and that nothing can shake you until you sleep alone on your second night inside your new house after apparently being completamente inappropriata, presentandosi alla porta a torso nudo - being completely inappropriate, showing up at the door shirtless. Trying to reason with Carina while she was overcome with anger had been a mistake, and I don't think I had ever experienced such a clear demonstration of her Italian temper until yesterday.

This situation sucked. I hated fighting, with all my heart, and Carina hated losing control of her feelings - this was more than clear, she had told me this more than once during the months we had been together - and now we both needed to cool our heads to pick up from where we left off.

That morning I had woken up next to Carina - so technically I hadn't slept alone - but her body was far away from mine, her knees pulled up in what looked like a fetal position, and I knew she was simply cold - I guess being able to tuck her feet under my legs at night is really something she treasures - and turning off the AC was the first thing I did that morning.

I kissed her forehead before leaving the room ready for work and I now regretted not waking her up to let her know I was leaving the house - but part of me would be completely devastated if she didn't ask me to come back to her like she always did, I decided against taking that chance.

-I can't believe there are still 18 hours left of our shift. - Jack grumbled, sitting down next to me at one of the station's kitchen tables.

-Rough night? - I asked before sipping my coffee; I was taking a break from the endless paperwork waiting for me in my office.

-Let's just say I didn't make the smartest choice by drinking half a bottle of whiskey last night. - He muttered, and his messy hair and the deep circles around his eyes proved his point.

-You don't usually make smart choices, Gibson. - Vic spoke from my other side as she took a fork of scrambled eggs to her mouth.

-Shut up, Hughes! - Jack spoke back and I just rolled my eyes forcing myself not to open my mouth and agree with Vic.

-What about you, Cap? How's the unpacking going? I think it will take over a month for you guys to get everything organized, I've never seen so many boxes together before. - Vic spoke up next to me and I laughed softly because I agreed with her, there were too many boxes.

-Uh, I have to... I have to help Ben with the truck. - Jack spoke after stuttering a few times next to me, I creased my forehead in the guy's direction, but he quickly got up and left the kitchen.

-Well? - Vic urged me to speak.

-We had a good day yesterday, we didn't unpack much because, you know, we got excited about the new house, but it was a good day until... - The words died in my mouth as I remembered how our evening had turned upside down in a matter of minutes.

And it wasn't even all the talk about anal things Carina would like to try - which definitely made me nervous and I was already wondering if I could really let her try to do anything with me in that area - but everything that came after that.

-Until? - Once again Vic wanted me to keep talking.

-Well, a neighbor, actually it seems that she is the sister of a neighbor, came to our house last night to hand us croissants to welcome us to the neighborhood and Carina thought she was hitting on me, which is simply not possible because I didn't exchange so much as five words with the woman before Carina came to the door as well. - I shrugged and drank more of my coffee.

-So, you didn't give Carina any reason to be jealous of you? - Vic creased her forehead at me and took another mouthful of eggs.

-Well, no... I was shirtless, I had a sports bra on, and Carina decided that the woman was looking at me as if, and I quote here, she was trying to get pieces of my body. - I sighed heavily at the end of the sentence. - But I swear I didn't even give the woman a second glance, I didn't even notice whether or not she was looking at me in a strange way...

-But did you deny it? - Vic asked back.

-Denied what?

-Did you deny that she was looking at you in a strange way even though you weren't sure if the woman really was doing that? - She specified the question with a questioning look on her face.

-Well, yes, what was I supposed to do?

-You keep your mouth shut! - She spoke as if it were obvious, and I arched my eyebrows. - Maya, you don't deny an accusation like that without proof that what Carina was saying wasn't true. If your clueless ass didn't notice that you were being eaten by another woman's eyes, that doesn't mean it wasn't happening.

-But Vic, I told you, there was no time for that to happen, Carina was beside me five seconds later, pushing my shirt against me and clearly establishing her territory as an alpha or something, I swear she almost pissed on me at that moment. - I rolled my eyes. - This is why I used to run away from relationships, all this pissing all around.

-As if you don't piss all around when someone is flirting with Carina! - It was Vic's turn to roll her eyes. - If I remember correctly, you almost broke a nurse's hand while greeting her, and you picked a fight with a guy who touched Carina without her permission the same night.

-Well, there was motive! There was flirting! There was touching! - I punctuated each sentence by lifting one of my fingers. - Nothing like that happened with that woman.

-So, it was just her eating you with her eyes? - Vic asked back.

-Allegedly.

-So, you and Carina are fighting? - Vic continued the flood of questions.

-No... I don't know... I don't think so? - I really wasn't sure and it was killing me little by little. - She was furious last night, and I tried to talk to her, but she was just getting redder and redder and her voice was rising, so I thought I'd better go to bed and she decided to work.

-So, you just forgot about your girlfriend and went to bed? - Vic's eyes widened.

-No! I... Ugh! - I grunted in frustration as I gulped down all the coffee that was left in my mug, hissing a little as the hot liquid went down my throat. - I don't handle yelling very well, it was making me anxious, and I do and say stupid things when I'm anxious, also Carina hates it when her negative feelings speak louder than her rationality, so I thought it was best for both of us to take some time to breathe and cool our heads.

-That was actually... Kind of mature? - The woman squinted her eyes in my direction. - You should apologize anyway.

-What? - The word came out louder than I would have liked, such was my surprise. - I'm not going to apologize, I didn't do anything wrong, Vic.

-I know, but Carina thinks... - She started to speak, but I interrupted her.

-I'm not going to apologize because Carina thinks I'm wrong, or I'll spend the rest of my life diminishing myself to fit into what Carina thinks is right. I'll apologize when I'm wrong, but I haven't done anything wrong. I may have been an idiot to answer the door shirtless and for that I already apologized yesterday, so I guess I'll just have to wait until she is calmer later. - I loved Carina with all my heart, but for our relationship to work out we would certainly have to continue to compromise for each other on healthy levels, and that included not apologizing just because the other person wants to hear an apology.

-Oh, it will be so much fun to follow your relationship. - Vic let out an amused chuckle, and I rolled my eyes for what seemed like the hundredth time that morning.

-I'm sure.

I was exhausted.

We had spent most of the day outside the station after breakfast - this is what happens when restaurants think it's more interesting to save money by not changing the necessary wiring inside a kitchen with gas stoves - and my muscles now ached, my shoulders felt heavy, my mind couldn't focus on any of the words in the report Andy had given me two hours ago.

I was about to get up from my chair when I heard two soft knocks on the door.

-Come in! - I allowed it.

The door opened slowly and, my God, how beautiful she looked.

Carina walked through the door with a shy smile on her lips, her hair was completely straight, parted on the side, one side tucked firmly behind her ear while the other fell magnificently in front of her shoulder. She wore a long-sleeved striped blouse tucked neatly into her high-waisted pants with a pair of heels on her feet.

-Ciao. - She spoke now with a chuckle, and I think it was prompted by my lips hanging open in shock at the sight of my beautiful girlfriend.

-Hi. - I said after clearing my throat a few times. - What are you doing here? Did something happen?

-I came here to give you this. - She spoke as she approached my desk and reached into her purse for a box of Ferrero Rocher chocolates, also known as my favorite chocolate, and held it out to me. I reached out my hand and took the box of chocolate that was being offered looking at it slightly confused, but my stomach was already completely grateful. - I thought about bringing flowers, but I thought you might need chocolate more than flowers after all the long hours at work.

-Yeah, definitely. - I smiled sideways at my girlfriend.

-I also came here to apologize. - She continued, this time her eyes lowered to the table between us and I pulled my chair away before standing up; the gesture caught her attention and I put the box of chocolate on the table while she did the same with her purse. - First of all for yelling. Regardless of why I yelled, I'm sorry that I raised my voice, I know it hurts you, it reminds you of your father, and I never want our home to be a place that reminds you of when you didn't feel safe. I am so sorry Maya, I promise I will try to control myself, it's just all my Italian bubbling up inside me, I talk loud and yell even when I'm not yelling at you, sometimes I'm just yelling at the situation, but still I will try to control myself.

-Thank you. - A huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders and even though last night had been a different experience from anything I was used to experiencing with Carina, I knew deep inside me that it had never been her intention to hurt me. - I really appreciate you trying not to yell in our home.

-Now for the second part of my apology... - Carina laughed softly, averting her eyes from mine now that her feet were suddenly looking much more interesting. I reached out both my hands and took hold of hers, pulling them towards me before intertwining our fingers and moving even closer to my girlfriend. - I'm a jealous person, it's part of who I am, it runs in my blood even when I try to tell myself that I shouldn't feel this way. I really didn't like that you answered the door shirtless, or that you didn't introduce me as your girlfriend, and I know that we've never been in a similar situation before, but we are building our lives together, aren't we? I want to be the only person who sees you in your undergarments and I want to be introduced as your girlfriend because that's what I am, is that too much to ask?

-No, it isn't. - I replied, stroking the backs of her hands with my thumbs. The wave of relief kept running through me because this is exactly what I always wanted with Carina, a mature conversation in which she can show me precisely the points where I need to improve or what I shouldn't do again so that she doesn't feel bad. - I meant it when I apologized yesterday for answering the door shirtless, it really was inappropriate, I should have picked up the shirt as soon as I realized it wasn't one of our friends, my stupid brain just didn't think of it at that moment, but I will make sure to do that next time. As for not introducing you as my girlfriend, I really thought it was more than clear that you are my girlfriend, that's why I didn't use the term. I was not embarrassed or wanting to hide that I have a girlfriend. I'm only proud to be able to call you that.

Carina gave me a small smile and I couldn't believe how lucky I was that I could now sleep and wake up next to this woman.

-Come here. - I spoke, pulling her hands to my back before hugging her shoulders and standing on my tiptoes so that I could reach her mouth since she was even taller than I was due to those damn sexy heels.

Our mouths were together in the next second, Carina's hands at the base of my back caused a tingling sensation in the area and the relief we both felt was more than clear with the sigh we let out at the same time as we started the kiss. Our lips slid quietly over each other, there was no hurry, just a silent promise that we would be fine.

ENGINE 19. AID CAR 19.

-Ugh! - I grunted as I pulled away from Carina.

-Go, bambina! - My girlfriend laughed softly. - And don't think I didn't notice that you left home without telling me today.

-I'm sorry! - I smiled embarrassed and walked towards the door.

-We'll talk about it tomorrow night after my shift. - Carina said and I nodded. - Be careful, I love you, come back to me.

-I'll try my best. - I ran toward the barn listening to the shouting and yelling of the other firefighters.

It was going to be a long night.

07:47 AM

Sleep. Sleep. Sleep.

That was the only thing going through my mind when I got home from my shift. I was completely exhausted, drained, and thinking more and more about how I should really start talking to Chief Ross about my career prospects within the fire department, there were at least two Battalion Chiefs about to retire and maybe this was my chance to get a little more peace of mind for my days - even if it meant getting further and further away from the action - after so many years at Station 19.

Taking a shower while still at the station was probably the smartest choice I had made, because as soon as I stepped through the doorway I left my backpack on one of the chairs at the dining table before going straight upstairs to my room. I grunted as I tucked myself under the covers knowing that I would get much more rest if I had a certain Italian to cuddle, but I wouldn't see Carina until the end of her shift - which ended at 8 p.m. - and the very thought was enough to make me crease my forehead as I pulled the comforter up to my chin.

1:23 PM

Go back to sleep.

Go back to sleep, Maya.

Go. Back. To. Sleep.

Even all the repetition in my head didn't make me get back to sleep and I guess I would have to settle for the - I lifted my head and looked at the cell phone screen on the nightstand - barely 6 hours of sleep I managed to get that morning.

I jumped out of bed, stood on my tiptoes as I stretched and decided that maybe it was time to start unpacking my boxes - at least the ones from our bedroom, since most of Carina's things were already stored inside the closet.

-Why do I have so much stuff? - I muttered to myself as I stared at the boxes stacked in the corner of the room.

I started with the box that I had labeled: CLOTHES I USE MOST and now I was thanking Maya from the past for placing the perfectly folded clothes inside the boxes; I opened the closet and couldn't contain the low laugh that escaped my chest when I realized that Carina had already taken over most of the space we had for our clothes. I couldn't even get mad at her for that, especially after seeing some definitely short dresses that were arranged in one of the racks.

-Okay, underwear probably goes in the first drawer! - I said to myself as I walked to the drawers arranged at the side of the closet.

As soon as I opened it my eyes widened in surprise to see all the sex toys we had once bought arranged neatly inside the drawer; after the initial shock I bit my lower lip and stuck the hand that wasn't holding my panties and bras in the back pocket of my pants and took a picture of the drawer.

"Apparently the first drawer is no longer for panties and bras"

I smiled to myself imagining the laughter that Carina would probably let out when she sees the message and went back to my mission of trying to organize my clothes.

When my cell phone beeped in my pocket I smiled before I even saw Carina's name on the screen.

"Much more important things should be in the first drawer!"

Before I could answer anything, another message arrived.

"I made you a sandwich, it's in the oven, I knew you'd be hungry when you woke up!"

"You are the best! Thank you!"

"Are you unpacking?"

"Trying to"

"There are so many boxes, it will take us a whole month to unpack everything"

"Most of my clothes are already hanging"

"Oh, I see that"

"Do you want to tell me something, Maya?"

"You have very pretty dresses"

"There's a lot of pretty lingerie I've never seen before too"

"Are you looking at my panties?"

"Maybe"

"Maya!"

"I was looking for a place to store my panties"

"They were just there"

"And I looked"

"And they're pretty"

"Pick something pretty for me to wear tonight, then"

My heart seemed to beat a little faster as if I was flirting with a girl I had just met and not my girlfriend who literally lived with me.

"Never has a message made me so happy!"

"You're silly, bambina!"

"But you like it!"

"A little bit"

"I need to go now, eat and unpack! Ti amo!"

"I love you too"

Carina made me so happy that the way I felt seemed too unreal.

07:45 PM

Okay, most of the boxes in the bedroom were already unpacked and most of my clothes were already hanging, tomorrow I could think about the guest room - since Carina would surely leave that part for last since her precious kitchen still had a million boxes to be unpacked - and soon our house would look more like a home than a warehouse.

I hurried downstairs because it was time to run. It was actually the perfect time to go running for an hour because then Carina would have time to be late - as she always was whenever Dr. Porter was the one taking her place at the hospital - then come home, take a relaxing shower and put on the beautiful lingerie I had chosen for her and which was now displayed in the middle of our bed; also, I’ll probably come home sweaty, with a red face, my muscles swollen, and my girlfriend will probably jump on me as soon as I walk through the door.

That is the dream.

During my run I tried to focus only on controlling my breathing and enjoying the loud music. It was the perfect opportunity to get to know the neighborhood a little better - to see people coming home from work, to see children being ushered into the house because it was bedtime, to see couples talking on the balcony, dogs being walked by their owners - and I liked what I was seeing.

Running was one of the things that gave me the most peace, time went by quickly, and I was often able to clear away most of the confusing thoughts that were usually trying to get the better of me.

I stopped to catch my breath for a second, looked at my watch and realized that there was a text message from Carina saying that she was almost home ten minutes ago - a smile immediately appearing on my lips - so I pulled out my earphones and was about to text her that I would be home soon when someone called me.

Not someone.

-Capitaine Bishop! Bonsoir! - Good evening! - Adrienne said after shoving a garbage bag in the trash can in front of her house, I mean, in front of her sister's house. She was standing a few feet in front of me and was wearing a sweater with a pair of pants that looked quite warm and comfortable and that just made me think about how I wanted to go home and get warm and comfortable, hopefully warm and comfortable underneath Carina.

-Hi, good evening. - I immediately looked down at my torso and let out a relieved sigh for having chosen a long-sleeved blouse and leggings for running tonight.

Thank you, cold Seattle fall.

-How are you this evening? - She smiled politely at me; her hands clasped in front of her body.

-Just running after a day full of unpacking. - I scratched the back of my head as I answered the woman, she was staring intently at my face, but her expression was relaxed. - What about you, Adrienne?

She smiled sideways and maybe she was making fun of me since I had just butchered her name.

-I'm sorry, I'm just a dumb American and I can't pronounce your name the right way, my girlfriend, Carina, she's Italian and would certainly do a better job than me. - Way to go, Bishop! Carina will be proud!

-You're not stupid. - She rolled her eyes, and I couldn't help but notice how thick her accent was. - But my evening is certainly as uninteresting as your day was with all the unpacking. Ma mère, uh, my mother convinced me to spend some time with my sister, but it's hard to be in a foreign country without any friends. It can be quite lonely.

-Oh, yes, absolutely! - I agreed and was a little sympathetic to her loneliness because it was a feeling I knew intimately, after all I had had a lot of trouble making friends myself during my adult life and regardless of whether the loneliness was caused by trauma or being in a foreign country without any friends, the feeling still sucked.

-No firefighting tonight? - She asked looking me up and down, probably just proving her point by signaling my running clothes.

-I had a 24-hour shift until this morning so I'm not working tonight. - I explained.

-Oh, pardonnez-moi. - Forgive me. - She said, and I creased my forehead. - I don't know much about what the life of a firefighter is like.

-It's okay. - I shrugged. - It's kind of complicated anyway.

-Oh, do you want to come in for a cup of tea? - The mention of a drink reminded me of food, and food reminded me of the croissants that had disappeared from the kitchen when I returned from work that morning. - You can explain to me more about the routine of a firefighter, or rather a Capitaine...

-Oh, I can't! Carina is waiting for me at home, she just arrived! - I moved my wrist upwards trying to show that I had received a message and honestly, I don't even know if the gesture seemed comprehensible, but still, I needed to get home. I certainly wasn't looking for trouble now that I finally felt that Carina and I were okay again.

-Oh, I see. - Adrienne was clearly disappointed. - It's just that you're easy to talk to and, well, the only person in the neighborhood I've talked to since I arrived. In fact, I was happy to see you move in just to give me an excuse to go talk to someone and try to make a new friend.

Oh, there was the word I needed to reassure Carina's heart.

The truth was that I was defensive during that whole conversation, the way I crossed my arms tightly against my chest was an attempt to show that I was not open to any kind of approach that might seem inappropriate, but now Adrienne was telling me that she was just lonely, in a foreign country, without any friends, and I guess I felt sorry for her.

-Maybe some other time? - I offered politely, trying to sound like a decent human being.

-Yes, maybe. - Adrienne had a small, sad smile on her lips, but she waved to me as I started walking and I waved back before I put the headphones back in my ears and ran back towards my house.

When I stopped in front of the house and saw the first floor lights on I realized that I now had three factors contributing to my tachycardia: the first - and most physiological - the short run I had taken, the second - and most heartwarming - the imminence of seeing the woman I so desperately loved, and the third - and most frightening - telling Carina that I had met Adrienne a few minutes ago.

I took one last deep breath and walked to the door, turned the knob and walked into the house.

-Ciao, bambina! - Carina spoke loudly from the kitchen, because of course she would be in the kitchen, and as soon as I took off my sneakers I walked to the sound of her voice. - It was a long run! I thought I would find you at home when I got home.

I opened my mouth to answer her, but the words disappeared when I saw my girlfriend dressed in nothing but the yellow lingerie I had chosen for her and a black satin kimono completely open at the front - which allowed me to see all the most perfect curves of her body. If the house was already warmer because of the heater, the room had become ten times hotter now.

-You're drooling, Maya. - She teased with a chuckle.

-Did you expect any other reaction? - I asked back, my eyes fixed on her breasts, which were far more voluminous than they truly were, due to the design of her bra. Her body seemed to exert a magnetic force over mine, my steps were automatic, and I moved my hands toward her body without even realizing what I was doing, but I licked my lips as I sighed with some relief when I felt the warm skin of her waist against my palms. - You look beautiful.

-Oh, you like it? My girlfriend picked it out for me. - Carina laughed again, her hands going to my shoulders. - Are you hungry?

-Oh, yes! I'm definitely hungry. - I tilted my face and placed a wet kiss on the curve of her breast before quickly nibbling the area.

-That's not what I'm talking about. - Carina replied, this time without a giggle, her voice definitely a little huskier. A sigh escaped her lips as I ran the tip of my tongue over the spot I had nibbled, tracing a path down the valley of her breasts before planting another wet kiss on that new spot.

-Well, that's exactly what I'm talking about. - My lips brushed against her skin as I spoke and inhaled Carina's scent deeply, but the voice in my head warned me of the dangers of continuing that evening without talking openly with Carina about the conversation I had just had with Adrienne; not because I owed my girlfriend any justification or explanation, but because she had been open and honest with me last night and I felt like I owed her the same thing. - Carina?

-Sì? - When I moved away from her body, I saw her with her eyes closed and a relaxed expression on her face.

-When I was coming back from my run, I stopped to take a break for a second, I was at the end of the street and that woman, Adrienne, was taking out the trash and we talked for a second. - There was no easy way to tell my girlfriend what had happened and maybe not getting straight to the point would only make her even angrier, but it was hard to imagine Carina being angrier than she seemed to be right now.

She immediately took a step backwards, disengaging herself from my touch, clenching her fists and grinding her teeth - doing so with such force that I could see the outline of the muscles in her jaw and the lines of the muscles and nerves in her neck.

-You what? - Carina asked harshly.

-We only talked for a brief moment, Car, I swear. I was fully and properly dressed and she only made small talk because she is all alone, without any friends, in a foreign country. She told me that. - I quickly explained.

-Of course, she's all alone and lonely, right Maya? No friends, uh? Let me guess, she wants to be your friend now? - I looked straight into her eyes, but when I opened my mouth, no words came out. Carina's hands were trembling at her sides, her posture was rigid, and part of me was prepared to receive her shout at any moment, but it didn't come. - Fantastic! È fottutamente fantastico, cazzo! - That's just fucking fantastic!

I could see that Carina was trying to control herself, but the expression and the red in her face along with the way her eyes were getting brighter with the tears - certainly motivated by hatred - that were gathering there told me all I needed to know.

-Maybe she mentioned something like that, yes. But she used precisely that word, "friend," and I know you may be thinking that she's using this excuse of being here all alone to try something, but she seemed truly sad, Carina. - I answered even though I knew that anything I said at that moment would only make her more upset, yet I wouldn't just bow my head to Carina just because she was feeling frustrated or jealous.

-Oh, was she sad? Maybe you should go over there and comfort her. - I could handle arguments, and Carina being upset, I could even try to understand her jealousy since she had been so honest with me about it, but the deep irony in her words stirred something inside me and I took determined steps toward her, pressing her body against one of the counters as she tried to escape my approach.

-No! - I said, looking into her eyes, both my hands resting on the counter behind her and keeping her body pinned between my arms. - I'm here, telling you what happened to show you that you can trust me, that I would never hide anything from you, that I'm being as honest as you were last night, but you're not going to do that, Carina! You will not suggest that I go and comfort another woman, a stranger, because of your jealousy. Have I ever given you any reason to be jealous of me since we started dating? Have I even looked at another woman or man during all these months? Have I?

Carina looked deep into my eyes, and as frustrated as I was by Carina's tone of voice and the implicit accusation behind it, the situation was strangely hot and my words came out much quieter than I had imagined, in a low, husky tone that betrayed my arousal, but showed all my seriousness.

-No. - She whispered, her teeth still gritted, but the fury behind her eyes seemed to be subsiding and now there was something different inside them, it certainly seemed that Carina was getting as turned on as I was.

-Then why are you acting as if you don't know that I am completely yours? - I asked still looking into her eyes, our faces now closer together allowed me to see when her expression changed, and a different sparkle appeared in her eyes. It was a dangerous game to mess with Carina's possessive side when she was burning with jealousy, but I secretly wanted to keep the woman on her toes, holding her breath and barely managing to hold back and not attack me at that moment.

I didn't take my eyes off of hers for a second, I moved my face a little closer and listened when Carina swallowed hard; it was she who broke eye contact for a brief moment, looking at my lips before running her tongue over her own.

-Go take a shower. - That's what she said, her eyes still on my mouth, and I was no longer so afraid of being forced to sleep on the couch.

-What? - I asked back in a provocative whisper.

-You're sweaty and I need a second. - Carina's eyes locked on mine again, anger and jealousy now mixed with her lust, and a delicious shiver ran down my spine. - And I need to get my mind in the right place to fuck you the way you deserve to be fucked tonight, so go take a shower.

-Yes, ma'am.