Stages of Grief

Two more days of sunshine did little to empty the bowl around Oblivion. But while the level of water seemed to remain unchanged, the level of hope was ever falling for those inside the manor.

The finding of Renat's bag had led to a flurry of activity, but nothing more had been discovered to give a clue as to his whereabouts. It seemed like the prince had been separated from his belongings before being carried away in the torrent.

During the waiting, Duchess Ashleigh had done everything in her power to distract the princess from her troubles, but it was difficult when she, too, was worried. Alaron had likewise wanted to bring his sister comfort, but after Junayd heard the palace rumors about the cloaked figure and the princess, the advisor told him to keep a little distance from her in public.

It seemed that the servants who had seen the twins' intimate embrace on the bed a few days prior were not good at keeping their mouths shut. What's more, they had drawn their own conclusions. Many were now blaming the Guardian for the prince's disappearance, speculating that he pushed Renat from the wall to have Mairwen to himself.

It did not take long for Junayd to pick up on the tale. Most every lady enjoyed catching his attention, and the fastest way to do so was to find something that would interest him. Royal gossip always grabbed his ear, not because the former general wanted to catch up on all the latest intrigue, but because it was the easiest way to gather information and prevent problems.

Upon hearing of the twins' supposed romantic relationship, Junayd's heart sank. He told them both as soon as he could, hoping that they would understand the problem.

"Not the first time the servants in Oblivion have hated me," Alaron sighed. "And they don't even know who I am this time." The young Guardian hung his hooded head. "I will be more careful in public. I don't care what people think of me, but I don't want them to think poorly of you, Mair."

The princess pursed her lips. "Forget all of them. People can be cruel. If they spent less time speculating, we would all be better for it," she spat bitterly.

Alaron had since been with his sister only as part of a group, and had refrained from letting any of the servants see them alone together. It was painful for the man not to do as he wanted, which was to hide his sister away and let her worry and grieve away from prying eyes, but Alaron did as he was advised and kept things professional.

Toward the end of the third day of searching, Duchess Ashleigh brought them the bad news. "I do not think we will find Prince Renat until the water recedes," she said gravely. "And even then, we may not find him at all. The water has a way of hiding and burying things, you see. I need to call back the boats. The people have to return to work. They have been away too long as it is."

Mairwen leaned on Junayd's arm. Eira stood straight, trying hard not to show her disappointment, and Alaron stood a distance away, unreadable under his hooded cloak.

"I understand," the princess answered after an extended pause. "Only... I would ask a favor. I have not gone out because you did not want me to take the place on a boat of a more experienced searcher. Now that they are all returning, I see no reason for me to remain here. Would you allow me the use of one of your boats so that I may search myself?"

Duchess Ashleigh hesitated before answering. "Your Highness, I do not think that is a good..."

"If it were Lord Fedelmid, wouldn't you try everything to get him back?" Mairwen looked meaningfully at the Duchess. "I have let others do the searching for me, now I need to look myself. If I do not find Renat, then we need to move on with our original plan. Either way, our time in Oblivion is coming to a close. Now, may I have one of your boats, or should I go hire one for myself?"

With a sigh, Ashleigh nodded. The Duchess knew that if she were in the same situation, nothing would stop her from jumping aboard a boat and doing all she could to find the missing man. "I will have the boat prepared immediately. But it is only a few hours until dark. You will not have long to search."

Mairwen was already pulling away from Junayd's arm as she prepared to leave. "I will not waste any more time then. Let us go."

Junayd, Eira and Alaron began to follow her from the sitting room, but Ashleigh caught the last's attention.

"Guardian," she said calmly. "A word, please."

Alaron froze. He knew from the tone that she was about to give a lecture of some kind. Anger and frustration filled him as he quickly cut her off.

"If you are going to tell me not to go, you can save your breath. There is nothing between the princess and I. The rumors are exactly that, just rumors! I am going with Her Highness and we will do our best to find her husband and salvage her happiness. The Princess deserves that after everything I have don--- after everything she has been through." The young man stopped to gather his thoughts as his chest heaved.

"Are you quite finished?" the Duchess asked with one eyebrow raised.

"No!" Alaron huffed, "I am only beginning."

Ashleigh nodded and took a seat in a chair similar to the ones the two had fallen asleep in within Mairwen's quarters. She gave him a tolerant smile. "Please, continue then..."

The Guardian's words caught in his throat as he surveyed her peaceful demeanor. "You...you weren't going to tell me not to go, were you?"

Chuckling softly, the white-haired duchess shook her head. "I pay no mind to rumors. I have seen how you interact with the princess. It is not romantic. It is brotherly."

"I don't know what you mean..." Alaron bit his tongue.

"Yes you do, but that is not what is important here. What is important is this: I was going to tell you to keep the princess safe, and be mindful of her. This kind of loss--the kind where the outcome is unknown--is the worst kind. Grief and hope mix together, making it almost impossible to bear. It is enough to make weaker souls go insane."

"You sound as if you speak from experience." The anger was gone from the man's voice, replaced by compassion.

"I do, but that is a tale for another day." Ashleigh smiled weakly. "Now, hurry along and take care of the princess, like a good brother should..."

"I don't know who you think..." Alaron tried to deny her claim once more, but it fell on deaf ears.

"I have not told a soul, nor will I, Guardian. I am just glad you have taken proper advantage of another chance at life. You are much improved from the impudent child I have always known. Though you always seem to visit me unwillingly," she added with more than a hint of amusement.

Alaron came forward, bent his knee before his elder cousin and kissed her hand. "You have always been so good. I shall return the favor someday."

"Take care of that beautiful princess waiting for you, and we will consider the debt even. Take care of yourself too, Alaron." The last word was little more than a whisper as she squeezed the man's hand. The duchess had great affection for her extended family even after all Zephyra had done.

Silently, Ashleigh thanked the Maker. She had lived to see the prince restored to his family. If this could happen, anything was possible.

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The boat was ready at the dock when the four searchers arrived. The man who greeted them handed Junayd a map and explained where and how they had been searching.

The advisor already knew this information as did the other three, but he wanted to make sure he was up to date on the proceedings. Taking the map from the boatman, Junayd and the others climbed inside the small rowboat.

"You sure you do not want to have one of us go with you," the man asked, motioning to the men still on the top of the wall.

The Princess beamed a smile on the dock worker. "Four people in this boat is more than enough. If we take anyone else, we will not have room for Renat when we find him," Mairwen responded brightly.

Alaron was startled by her matter-of-fact nature. Her whole demeanor had changed since leaving the manor. She was…joyfully optimistic. While Alaron hoped Mairwen was right, he also recalled Ashleigh's words. The Guardian would need to watch his sister closely.

The man on the dock nodded, and he and another removed the ropes lashing the boat to the wall from their pegs. Together they lowered the boat over the side, letting it swing rhythmically until it touched the water's surface.

The spray brushed across Mairwen's face as she turned in her seat at the front to look outwards. She breathed deeply, a large smile plastered on her face. "Renat is out there. I can feel it. And we are going to find him. Are you ready?"

She turned back to Alaron, who gave an encouraging nod. The Guardian was very glad she could not see his face just then. There was no hiding the fear of what would happen if the woman was wrong.

It would be disastrous.