Oneshot nine,Infertile

Emmy pov

It was finally time that i looked at the test me and daveed had been trying week after week but nothing seemed to work, we planed so we could try at the peek of my sycle but nothing ever worrked, 3 months of trying seems a little over board but from time to time we would just have regular sex forgetting all about the baby. I'm starting to think I might be infertile but I can't think like that. I have to stay positive, okay I'll schedule an appointment with my doctor to get a check up and see what's going on in there.

Daveed: So what does it say?

Emmy: i haven't even looked myself

Daveed: look i know you're scared but no matter what the outcome is ill always love you

Emmy: okay

I took a deep breath and picked up the stick, Negative, like the last time my heart dropped getting discouraged.

Daveed: emmy… its okay we can try again

Emmy: no daveed something is wrong haven't you noticed we've done it perfect timing and still nothing daveed i know i told you my biggest dream was to have a baby of my own but we need to think about this what if im Infertile

Daveed: but your dream

Emmy: and maybe my dream is unattainable, somethings are meant to be and maybe it's a sign that we shouldn't have a baby

Daveed: What are you saying emmy?

Emmy: what i'm saying is that you and me both have careers that are doing so well but we want to make time for a child at the same time, i don't know what i saying but the point is that maybe i'm not the one for you

Daveed: emmy no no no you will not sit here and blame yourself if you can't have a baby

Emmy: okay okay okay i'll stop beating myself up if that'll make you happy

Daveed: yes it well

Emmy: okay okay i'll just schedule an appointment for tomorrow i have nothing to do that day so early as possible

Daveed: and i'll come with

Emmy: no daveed you have work to do and meanings

Daveed: that stuff can wait for you, i want to be their even if the outcome is something that we do like

Emmy: awww thanks daveed

Daveed; you don't have to thank me im suppose to do this

Emmy: come on i'll scheduled the appointment you can head off to bed

Daveed: do be long i'll be waiting

Daveed left the bathroom leaving a kiss on my forehead. I threw out the test and got to planning the appointment, about an hour of waiting on the phone. Someone finally answered and I got the earliest appointment I could get.

Emmy: well that's done

Going into the bedroom Daveed is asleep and so are Luna and moose my 3 little boys. I laughed at the sight of them and then got in bed. I can't fall asleep and just lay there until I feel daveeds pull me closer to him in a hug. What if i cant have baby at all will daveed leave me because of that he said he'd always wanted a family as soon as possible but what if i couldn't make him happy, all i want to do is make him happy my whole life i wanted a family for my child to have a mom and dad. I guess it comes with the ever lasting sting of abandonment i felt knowing my mom gave me away, i was never mad at her but that sting was still there.

I let out silent sobs for a while and as I'm finally about to drift off I hear the soft voice of Daveed say ``I'll always love you even if you can't have a baby" and with that I'm pulled into my dream land.

Her dream was everything you'd expect from knowing you might have to face one of your biggest fears: learning you can have a child, the one thing in life that didn't you didn't have the chance to change or control.

The next day Emmy and Daveed are in a rush to the doctors office, waking up almost an hour late but still make it there with little time to spare thanks to daverds last min6 reckless driving, they finally take their seats and wait for their appointment to start knowing this could patently change everything. Daveed could tell Emmy was insurce about something and tried comforting her with a gentle hand, she only pushed it away in discomfort.

Daveed : Emmy bitch can tell you stressed about something

Emmy: what me no….. Fine I'm scared daveed

Daveed: about what

They try to keep the conversation between them as best as they can as they can see the other couple starting to stare and give judgemental glares, they get quiet or and lean in closer.

Emmy: daveed you know I said I wanted to have kids and you wanted to have kids, we've tried and tried day in and day out but nothing seems to work, it's just if I find out that I can't have kids it's just… I'm scared you'll leave me

Daveed: stares with an apologetic glance and grabs her hand

Daveed: Emmy raver lampman you know I would never leave you for another girl in the work, just because you can't get pregnant. And plue if you can't we can always adopt or have a surrogate mother

Emmy: I know daveed

Tears started to roll down her eyes as she started to give a little shy smile to daveed

Emdaveed: and look at me if you every think I'd leave you again over something that you can't control then your either crazy or stupid, and you not either one now calm down

Emmy shook her head at Daveed and they continued their wait until the nurse came out and looked at the clipboard then back at the people sitting in the room, there were only 2 couples in the room.

Nurse Debbi: um I'm looking for a miss raver lampman and a Mr Diggs

Daveed: that's us

They stand up in unasin and walk to the back door leading into the clinic the nurse leads them to a room and has Emmy lay down on the bed and daveed sut in the chair next to her for comfort.

Daveed: you ready?

Emmy strugs and looks sad once again daveed squeezes her hand and reassures her.

Emmy: I guess

Nurse Debbi: okay the doctor will be with you shorty

The nurse leaves the room and Daveed and Emmy are left in silence once again.

Emmy: maybe we don't have to do this!?

Daveed: what this is the only way you'll find out

Emmy: I know but I don't think I can handle the truth at the moment

Daveed: okay how about this when the results come back I'll tell you as soon as we leave the clinic okay

Emmy: okay I think that's for the best if you wanna see me break down in a doctors office

Daveed: okay

Doctor yabo: hello miss Raver lampman, i understand that you are here to find out if you are fertile

Emmy; yup and also can you just give the answer to daveed in an envelope

Doctor yabo: yes, now let's get into the exam, um to optimize the confort i hope that the husband would leave the room

Daveed: oh sure sure, i'll be out in the waiting room

They share a quick kiss and Daveed leaves the room, the exam bagan they check all the vital parts of the body to make sure that wasn't the problem.

1 hour the exam was over and the doctor made sure to keep an smile on her face no to worry emmy too much, she put the paper work into an envelope and handed it to emmy, emmy almost running to the waiting room found daveed asleep on the hard chairs she wakes him up and they leave into the offices hallway.

Daveed: so the results

Emmy: there in this envelope

Daveed: Are you sure you want to open them now?

Emmy: yeah better not to wait when i'm in a good mood

She hands him the envelope and he opens slowly now wanting to know the answer himself, he pulls the slip of paper out and the picture annotated with the spasitac problem alongside it. The results in big bold red letters Infertile, something in daveed felt like it had shattered not because he felt sad for himself , but for emmy she'd wanted this for so long but now they knew why she couldn't have a baby why things were this way. He handed her the paper and she quickly scanned over it and her faces dropped when her eye caught on the bold writing infertile.

The word rang in her head over and over again taunting her with the answer she died to know, she was prepared for the possibility of her not being able to have a baby but when she finally saw it. It hurt more than being cut with a dull knife. She was snapped out of her thoughts when she felt daveeds hand resting on her shoulder.

Daveed: what did i saw it doesnt change a thing

Emmy: I know but…

Daveed: no buts, i said it wouldn't change a thing between us even if it meant we couldn't have a child of our own

Emmy: okay

Daveed pulled her into a tight hug as Emmy began to cry her eyes out. The pain was unbearable and it pained Daveed to see Emmy this broken down and hurt, the feeling she was feeling was something she thought she'd never experience. But here it was.

Daveed: emmy are you going to be okay

Emmy: i'll be fine

Emy was lying when she said she was going to be fine, but did not want to worry him anymore.