Artificer

Grumbling to himself he sighed and kicked a rock. That made his sore feet hurt even more. Who knew that walking so much would make your feet hurt. Comfortable shoes, yes he would definitely make comfortable shoes. Maybe with cushions. No ones that floated. Well, that might be tricky. How about wheels. No, the grass would get caught in the wheels. What about…

"Hi! I'm Eion. I'm a merchant! Do you want to buy something!" An energetic voice called out from right beside them.

Slevin let out a shrill shriek of surprise, his squeaky voice cracking some. An entire cart, pulled by the mangiest donkey they had ever seen. Had managed to sneak up on them while they were lost in thought. Sitting at the settee was a tall figure wearing a patched-up set of robes. A cowl was pulled over their head, letting Slevin see only a blank white mask.

"What?" Slevin squeaked out. As a gnome, he had to look up, way up at the figure sitting in the wagon.

"Hi! I'm Eion. I'm a merchant! Do you want to buy something!" The masked figure repeated.

"What? Here?" He looked around at the empty road. "Why would I want to buy something here? Who just rolls up and asks that?" Slevin huffed and squeaked in confusion.

"It is just easier to go along with it." A deeper voice full of resignation spoke up. Slevin turned to find a dwarf leaning over the side rail of the cart looking down at him. There was a cracking sound and a piece of wood broke off from dry rot. The dwarven figure gingerly moved back seeming afraid they would soon fall out themselves.

"Is that so? Hmm. Well, what do you have to sell then?" Slevin wondered if this was just how the surface world worked. Did merchants just go around hoping to find buyers instead of the other way around? Fascinating.

The masked figure bounced in their seat and then flung themselves over the backrest of the settee to dig in the back of the cart. "I have…I have… I have…" Suddenly they set back up and were holding a… rock. "I've got a rock!"

The dwarf face palmed in the back and seemed to be muttering words while staring at the sky.

"Hmm, a rock? Does it do anything?" Slevin was confused. Were rocks valuable? Had he been kicking valuable treasure down the side of the road?

"Nope. It's just a rock. But it's kind of shaped like a potato! I thought it was one when I was digging some up." Slevin blinked.

"Nope. That is just stupid. Plain stupid. No one wants a potatoe-shaped rock!" Slevin's voice rose a few octaves into even squeakier territory. He should have known, even on the surface, everyone was out to trick him. Just because he spent his entire life in a lab creating the most amazing things ever. People thought him naive. He would show them. He wasn't insane. He wasn't mad. Some day his inventions would revolutionize the world! First, he just needed resources and money. To think the first surface dwellers he would meet would be so rude! Hmph.

Before he could give the strange mask person a piece of his brilliant mind there was a snort from behind him. "Oh look! Piggies! Ahhh I don't have anything to feed them." The masked person cried out sounding both excited and disappointed at once.

Turning around Slevin found a small sounder of wild boars. "Ack! Why are they so big!" Each of the beasts was big enough to swallow him whole! Was everything on the surface so big? Look at those tusks… Actually… look at those tusks. I could make something with them for sure… I don't know what but…

While he drifted off into thought over what uses a wild boar's tusks of such magnitude could be used for the beasts squealed loudly and charged. Dragged again from his contemplation on his machinations he realized the sounder wasn't off-put by the masked idiot's lack of food. They seemed to have found something for themselves.

"No! Bad pig! NO!" Pulling a javelin from their pack they hurled it at the monster. It jabbed right into the forehead of the leading beast. It was massive and squealed like… well a stuck pig. Sadly, his attack seemed only to anger the monster. Lifting his gloved hand the javelin stuck in the forehead of the monster shook and wiggled before flying free to return to his hand. Slevin wasn't a coward. But only an idiot would stand facing a whole sounder of feral hogs big enough to gobble up a brilliant gnome in an instant. Little stubby legs pumped as they moved around the cart before trying to scramble up into the back.

"Where are you gnome stairs? Who builds a cart without gnome access!" The Dwarf in the back grabbed the back of their armor and yonked them up while turning towards the charging swine. His free calloused hand raised and when it did a blast of golden light erupted from the ground engulfing that leading hog. It squealed loudly as it barreled forward while the other hogs started to veer away. Unlike the others, it looked intent on ramming into the side of the decrepit cart.

Slevin was already drawing back his arm to hurl his custom-made javelin. But thanks to his brilliant mind he just knew it wasn't likely to stop the beasts charge when something… inconceivable happened. The masked figure seemed to realize the "piggies" intent to ram the cart and let out a panicked cry. They leapt out of the cart and as little more than a blur rushed up on the charging beast. They skidded to a stop next to it and chopped down with a long sword. Their blade cut deeply into the back of the enormous monstrously huge beast's neck. Blood spurted out like a fountain but the beast only squealed in agony, still alive. Then to the onlookers' astonishment, the masked figure kicked the beast in the head, ripping it free of the body and sending it bouncing away.

The heavy body collapsed on limp legs and skidded forward stopping just shy of the cart. "Bad Piggie! No breaking my cart! I still have payments to make on it." Slevin still standing with his arm cocked back, ready to launch his javelin glanced at the dwarf beside him.

"What just happened?" His high-pitched voice was full of confusion and curiosity. The surface was so interesting!

With a shrug, the dwarf planted one armored foot on the edge of the cart. Only a bit of the wood fell away. "The Gods only know." He leapt forward kicking off from the cart with his shield held in both hands. One of the boars had made the mistake of circling the cart and the armored dwarf crashed down on its back. His shield cleaving into the back of its neck following Eion's lead. "Names Banmir by the way!" He shouted as he raised the shield to continue chopping into the back of the boar's neck as it carried him away.

Slevin turned to see the masked figure twisting away to avoid another charging beast before planting his hands on the lowered head of one that sought to gore him. Using it as a push-off point to vault over it with a child-like giggle.

"Hmm. Interesting! Maybe the surface won't be so bad." With a wild giggle of his own, he hurled his javelin at one of the beasts. It soon returned to his hand. With so many interesting things going on he would definitely be inspired to come up with the most brilliant of inventions.