Sara

Right at nine my phone dings.  I dart over to it on my bed and pick it up to read Bryson's name on it.  

    "He's here!"  I call out to Mia, who is standing in front of the mirror applying her tenth coat of mascara.  

    "Okay, I'm ready.  How do I look?"  She spins around and flashes me her white smile.  

    "Amazing, as usual."  I reply, meaning every word of it.  Mia is absolutely gorgeous with her long blonde curls and long legs.  When she walks into a room, every guy notices.  I truly don't know how she is still single.  I guess guys just assume she is out of their league.  I mean, she does get hit on all the time when we are out and about, but she never takes it seriously.  I know Jake did a number on her, but that was so long ago.  She is confident, but not in a stuck-up way.  

    "Let's go!"  Mia grabs her clutch off her bed and heads past me towards the door.  I follow her and try my best not to trip in my four-inch heels that Mia had insisted I wear tonight.  

    Bryson was waiting for us outside his car and I could already see his mouth drop when we made our way towards him.  I couldn't tell if he was looking at Mia or me.  He opened the car door for us as Mia slid in.  

    "You look beautiful," He whispered in my ear.  I looked up at him and smiled, as I slid in next to Mia.   I guess that answers my question.

    I couldn't help but smile as he closed the door behind me.  I was surprised to see that he had someone with him in the passenger seat.  This must be Alex.  He gave me a slight smile and a nod but didn't speak.  He was kind of cute, in a bad boy way.  No comparison to Bryson though.  He had bleached out spikes and a five o'clock shadow working for him.  Even from my seat I could tell he was ripped.  He had two piercings in his eyebrow and lip and arms full of tattoos.  

    "Ladies, remember Alex?"  Bryson spoke, practically reading my mind.  How does he always do that?  "Alex, this is Sara and Mia."  Alex still didn't speak but continued to eye me.  Right as I wondered if Bryson had noticed, he looked over at Alex and then back at me in his rearview mirror.  We made eye contact and I couldn't tear my eyes away.  Did I mention that Bryson has the prettiest dark eyes?  

    The ride was awkward, I could feel Alex's stare.  Mia was aware of it also.  She had texted me asking about it.  

    "Who wants Sara duty tonight?"  Mia jokes, catching me off guard.  I make eye contact with Bryson once again in the rearview mirror and blush.  Alex looks back at me with a raised eyebrow.  

    "I am not that bad," I defend myself.  Mia laughs and insists that she was just joking.  I knew that, but hate how she tries to embarrass me, especially in front of people I don't know.  Especially in front of Bryson.  "Last party was different."  

    "What happened last party?"  Alex asked, breaking his silence.  His words were almost too quiet to hear.  Oh great, here we go.  I was surprised when Bryson didn't speak up though.

    "Her lame ass boyfriend cheated on her," Mia stated flatly.  Alex then gives me a full look over.  His eyes move from my toes to my face slowly.  "Why do you keep looking at her like that?"  Mia always speaks her mind.  Always. 

    "Who would cheat, when they get to hit that every night?"  He said, ignoring Mia's questions.  My mouth dropped open in shock that he would talk about me like that.  I look over at Mia, who looks equally as shocked.  When I look in the mirror at Bryson, I am surprised to see anger in his eyes.  

    "Shut the hell up," Bryson warns.  

    "Dude, just saying," Alex holds his hands up in the air.  "Blondie ain't so bad either. First choice is the brunette though."

    I almost giggle at that comment.  I try to not look over at Mia but can't help it.  Most guys prefer her over me any day.  

    Before this conversation can go any farther, the car stops.  I look out the window and see the familiar frat house.  I can tell that there are a lot of people here already by the number of cars parked out front.  

    "What a dick," Mia mutters under her breath as we walk towards the front door.  I try to hide my giggle.  Alex and Bryson are right behind us as we enter.  

    "What's up, guys?"  James immediately greets us.  It's clear that he is already highly intoxicated by the way he is stumbling all around.  He has a red solo cup in one hand and an unlit cigarette in the other. His green eyes are bloodshot, and his shaggy blonde hair is all over the place. 

    "I'll get us some drinks," Alex says as he makes his way towards the kitchen.  Bryson stays close to us and I realize that he probably won't leave my side this evening incase Rob shows up.  In a way, that makes me feel relieved.  I know how much me being around Bryson bugs him, so that would give me some satisfaction.  

    I feel an arm drape across my shoulders.  I turn around expecting Bryson but am surprised to see that it is Alex.  

    "Here you go, sexy."  He hands me a red solo cup.  The liquid inside is clear.  

    "What is this?"  I shout, leaning in so he can hear me above the music. 

    "Just try it." He takes a drink from his cup.  Right as I am about to take a sip, someone snatches the cup from my hands. 

    "I don't think so," Bryson snaps.  "I can smell the vodka from here." He sits the cup down on a nearby table as Mia gives me a grin.  I already know what she is thinking.  I shrug Alex's arm off my shoulder, but it doesn't budge.  Instead he squeezes tighter.  Bryson looks beyond pissed.  

    "What the hell is this?" The familiar voice startles me.  Before I even have the chance to spin around, I can feel Alex's arm being pushed off me.  Standing there is Rob, and he looks just as pissed as Bryson, if not more.

    Bryson steps towards me, always my knight in shining armor.  Rob's face is such a dark shade of red I feel like he could explode at any moment.  

    "Calm down, Rob.  I'm not here with anyone like that."  I shouted above the music.  

    "And even if she was, what business is it of yours?"  Alex blurted out, challenging Rob.  I looked over at Mia, who just stood there in shock, her mouth gaping open. 

    "I'm Sara's boyfriend.  Who are you?"  Rob's face is inches from Alex's at this point. 

    "Ex-boyfriend, actually," Mia chimes in.  "Speaking of, where is Becca?"  I shoot Mia a look, telling her to shut her mouth.  She sees me but doesn't acknowledge it.  

    Rob takes his eyes off Alex to briefly look at Mia.  Then his eyes meet mine.  I can tell that he is already drunk by the redness of them.  He has always been a heavy drinker at these things.

    "Sara, baby, I love you and I'm sorry.  You know you're the only one I want."  Rob pleads, ignoring Mia's question.  His anger seems to be subsiding, and his voice is filled with sadness and regret.  Alex wraps his arm around my waist, catching me by surprise.  He pulled me into him, like he was marking his territory.  

    Just as I see Bryson move out of the corner of my eye, I am surprised to see him walk past us and towards the kitchen.  Disappointment shifted through me as I watched him leave.  I thought he would always be the one to watch over me. 

    "Rob, fuck off."  Mia said dryly, as she grabbed my arm and pulled me away from both Rob and Alex.  

    "Fuck you, Mia!"  He shouted after us.  

    I didn't even realize I was tearing up until it was too late.  I don't know why I let Rob get to me every time.  Did I really allow him to treat me like this for two years?  Was it always this bad?  

    "We need drinks pronto," Mia said, leading us in the same direction Bryson went.  I scan the room, looking for him.  I halfway expected to see him with the group of girls that were only partly dressed, surrounding the table, gossiping as usual.  Right as I poured myself a drink, vodka mixed with juice, I noticed him leaning up again the counter, his back towards me.  I grabbed my cup and made my way towards him.  He had a bottle in his hand.  Jack Daniels Whiskey to be exact. 

    "Bryson?"  I said his name before I realized what I was doing.  He either didn't hear me or he was ignoring me.  I stopped in front of him.  His eyes found mine, and then he took another long swig of whiskey.  He rarely drinks, so I know something is wrong.  "What's wrong?" 

    He doesn't answer immediately.  Almost like he is trying to think of what to say.  I look for Mia and see her still at the drink table.  Alex is beside her now and they are talking.  

    "Do you still love him?"  The words take me by surprise.  I do.  I mean, I think I do.  Was it ever true love?  If it was, wouldn't I have wanted to give myself to him by now?  I shrug my shoulders, not knowing what to say. 

    "Was he serious about what he said?"  Bryson continues.  His voice is low, lower than I have ever heard.  He takes another drink from the bottle.  

    "About what?" I ask, confused.  His darks eyes make me swoon every time.  I have always felt attracted to Bryson from the day I met him in our English Comp class, the first day of my freshman year.  I had secretly been hoping that he would make a move and ask me out, but after a few months of waiting, I accepted a date from another guy, which happened to be Rob.  

    "You…. Being a virgin?" Bryson's question came as a complete shock to me.  I could feel my cheeks grow hot and my eyes had to be the size of golf balls.  

    I search for the words, but instead just nod.  I can't read the look on his face.  

    "How is that possible?"  He asks, catching me by surprise once again.

    "What do you mean?"  

    "You have guys lining up for you."

    "I promised myself I would wait until I found the right person," I felt as lame saying it as it sounded.  

    "And Rob wasn't the right person?" Bryson took another drink from the bottle, this time a longer one.  I reached for the bottle and grabbed it.  

    "Enough!  What the hell is wrong with you?"  I sat the bottle down on the counter, along with others.  Thankfully, he didn't attempt to grab it again. 

    "Answer me," Bryson demands.  I have never seen him like this.  I'm not scared of him; I know he would never hurt me.  

    "…. No."  I can't believe we are discussing my virginity. 

    "Why not?"  I can't read his eyes.  They are burning into me and I can't look away.  He runs his hand through is dark hair.  

    "He tried a few times.  I stopped it.  It just didn't feel right."  I wanted to tell him the truth.  The truth I hadn't ever told anyone.  Even Mia. 

    Before I could process what was being said, he grabbed my face and his lips met mine.  I jerked back and studied his face.  Is he that drunk?

    "I…. can't" I stammer, backing away from him.  He reaches for me, but before his fingers can grasp my arm, I turn around and head back into the other room. 

    Why did I stop him?  That's what I have always wanted. 

    I feel someone grab my arm, and I swirl around, expecting to see Bryson coming after me.  Instead it was Rob again.  I could tell he hasn't quit drinking between our visits.

    "Let's go talk somewhere alone." He didn't wait for a reply before pulling me towards the stairs.  I look back over my shoulder to see if Bryson or Mia were around.  They were nowhere to be seen.  

    He pulls me into the first open door he sees.  It was someone's bedroom.  Someone who apparently really likes football.  

    "What do you want?"  I demanded, pulling my arm back out of his grasp.  

    "I am sorry.  Becca means nothing to me.  I want you back."  I can tell by the look on his face that he is sincere.  I do believe that he is sorry, that is was a drunken mistake.  But how many drunken mistakes can one make before it's too many?  I look around and realize that this was the room.  This was the same room that I had found him in with Becca, his pants down around his ankles.  

    "Rob, I just need some time, okay?"  I try my best to keep my composure.  I don't want to give him the satisfaction of letting him know how much I care.  He doesn't deserve my tears.  Inside, I feel like I am about to explode.  This is all too much for me.

    Robs nostrils flare, and I can see his eyes growing with frustration.  "What do I need to do to show you that you are the one for me?"   With that, he slammed his fist into the wall, cracking the sheetrock.  I step back, towards the door.

    "Sara?"  I hear Mia's voice.  She is coming up the stairs.  Oh, thank God.  

    Before I can respond, her figure appears in the doorway.  "What's going on?"  Alex is behind her.  Her eyes immediately find the broken wall. 

    "I will not let her go without a fight," Rob shouts, looking past Mia, at Alex.  His fists are balled up at his sides and I am afraid for the wall once again.  Rob has always had a temper, with or without the alcohol.  "Please tell me you're not hooking up with this dude," Rob looks at me and I shuddered.  

    "What? No, Rob.  I'm not." I reply faster than I should've.  Even if I were, it is no longer your business. 

    "Let's go, Sara."  I look at Mia and Alex and then back at Rob.  "Let's find Bryson and go." 

    I start towards the door and am surprised that Rob doesn't even try to stop me.  I don't look back and follow my friends down the stairs.  

We look all over for Bryson but can't seem to find him anywhere.  I look in the kitchen where I last saw him but don't see any sign of him.  

"Let's look upstairs," Mia suggests, grabbing my hand.  "Alex, will you look outside and then meet us at the car?"  Alex nodded, and went out the front as we went back up the stairs once again.  I got past the first doorway, without even looking in to see if Rob was still in there.  The next two doors were closed and locked, so we try the fourth.  

"Oh, my gosh!"  Mia shrieks.  I peak in and can't believe what I see. It's like de-ja-vu, just switch out Rob for Bryson.  My mouth drops open and I can't take my eyes away.  Both are still fully clothed, but they were in a heavy make out session.  Bryson's eyes meet mine and then he realizes what he's done.  I turn around and run back down the stairs.  

"Whoa, what's wrong?" A too familiar voice questions after I run smack dab into him.  I look up to see Rob's face, twisted with concern.  I take the red cup right out of his hand and chug it until it's gone.  

Ugh…that was straight vodka. I cringe at the taste.

"Can you take me home?" I ask, handing him back the empty cup.  I can't believe I am this desperate to ask my ex that cheated on me for a ride, but I just need to get out of here.  Even though we aren't together, after two years together I can trust being in a car alone with him.  A sharp pain runs through my chest.  I feel nauseous.  Then I realized that I feel worse now than I did the other night when I found Rob and Becca. 

Why did it feel like I was just stabbed in the heart?  Why did Bryson's actions hurt me more than Rob's?  Why am I more confused now than ever?

"Sure," Rob sat the cup on a nearby table, and led me through the crowd of people.  

"Actually, let's stop for a drink first."  I say, taking off towards the kitchen.  Rob followed right behind me.  I grab another cup and fill it to the rim, half vodka, and half juice again.  

"Pace yourself," Rob warned, taking the bottle of vodka out of my hand.  "What's going on?"  

I ignore him and throw the drink back.  It burns my throat going down, but I don't care.  I just want to numb these feelings.  I slam the cup down on the counter.  Empty. I haven't drunk this much in a long time.  

"Ready, let's go."  With that, I take off back towards the front door, almost running straight into Alex.  I stumble back.

"Hey! Mia is looking for you," he says, looking from me to Rob, obviously confused. 

"Tell her I'm leaving," I reply, attempting to go around him.  He steps over and blocks my path, making me almost fall over.

"Wait, are you okay?"  His brows furrow together as he examines me.  "Are you drunk?" 

"She's fine.  I'm taking her home," Rob cuts in, answering for me.  

"I don't think that is a good idea," Alex argues, standing his ground.  

"Move or I'll make you move," Rob threatens.  He shoves his way past Alex and grabs my hand.  

I look over my shoulder at Alex.  At this point I am seeing two of him.  He is watching us leave but doesn't try to stop us.