Right Before My Eyes

"Do not fear failure but rather fear not trying."

-Quote by Roy T. Bennett

Aiden POV (Man's Point of View)

While the evening light shimmered through awning windows above, a population of people were wandering around the establishment, losing track of the hours they'd spent for the day.

Unlike everyday life, many were so dejected of the numerous cases, that even little happiness wouldn't even afford to withstand this oppressive occurrence. Countless people were distancing with each other or bothered to even greet the untrusted. Bunch of police officers patrolled about, eyeing to every citizens who might be disobeying the authority's regulation. Alcohols were everywhere, constantly used by various individuals; and windows were permanently opened, making way for the natural air to go inwards.

I know that its kind of strange given how much more spirited the place was supposed to be (I mean this is the hospital so it isnt supposed to be like that but... uhh... let's say, it is not that worse?) but I can't help it. The situation been like this for months already since the day the WHO organization declared COVID19 a pandemic.

It started after an infectious disease caused a stampede all over the citizens; once again, unleashed from the horrors that went back 1918.

Back then, the outbreak of the Spanish swine fever was awfully formidable. No one would even want to remember the sufferings and pain poured out amidst those terrible years. Due to that, alot of people generations after didn't even expect its capability of arising although history were certain that one of its kind would eventually reborn.

To think that alot actually call the pandemic false on its earliest days makes me piss my pants. Guess that's what happens when they just blatantly ignore studies about the said virus because certainly they proposed between the lines that this century is more advance and modernized than what it was on the past. Although, its obviously clear that nothing can actually stop it from emerging out of the surface.

Yes, I admit the chances are high for it to be stopped with the generation's innovative and advanced findings but it doesn't excuse the fact that we had to face the same effect as the past. Remember that, it takes a great deal for us to finally terminate it. That includes a big amount of research. (Here am I again with my long ass essay and I haven't got to the story yet. Nevermind me. Just Aiden, that blabberhead guy you met in highschool.)

So over centuries, there was SARS back in 2004, bird flu, and many more that were descendants of the said virus. Then now, there's this COVID-19 epidemic scampering throughout Wuhan, China... and yeh. Guess we had to face our consequences before we start to act.

On my way to the ER, every step on the tiles feels like freezing as I paved through busy hallways of the neighboring hospital. Needlessly, my arms and legs at the same time were shivering intolerably, unsettled by the situation running around; while, the penetrating iodoform scent ran throughout my lungs, appending anxiousness all over my head. Since my hands were also on a tremor, I was worried that maybe my Canon digital camera would helplessly fall out.

I wore a full sleeved leather jacket outside my lambswool turtle neck sweater with a grayish hoodie covering my quiff leather black hair. I also wore harbor grey trousers for my legs. I did what matters necessarily to protect myself from airborne particles by keeping my skin hidden on the layers of my garments.

A pair of disposable gloves slipped through my fingers, my eyes concealed with safety goggles, and chelsea boots over my feet. I even ensured that I'll not be able to breath as easily since I'd carefully sealed my nose and mouth with a surgical mask beneath my n95 respirator.

The only thing I'm thinking right now was the possibility of getting out of here before it's too late. Besides I wouldn't have gone here without a single purpose, considering the dangers awaiting from this place.

But I couldn't help it, my boss insisted me to do a documentary about the responsibilities of the medical workers during the COVID-19 crisis, since no one from my workmates would do so; so I actually thought that this is a good oppurtunity for a person like me to shine, after all they are always stealing my thunder and everything.

I was too dumb to even realize how much will I regret if I ever come here.

'All for money...' Therefore I mumbled,

I was gonna take it all back right now and leave the crap out of this place; when suddenly I stopped on my tracks infront of the sanitation tent, which was blocking the entrance of the emergency room.

There were two of them, one for the entrance and the exit. Its vertical rectangular prism were fabricated with PVC frames, plated with plastic enclosure from the back and the upper ceiling until the two sides. The doorway was hanged with plastic curtain strips and an anti-slip platform drooped on its base. The diffuser system with a built-in motor positioned on the inside of the chamber.

A placard which is posted on the left bulletin board, alsoe left a warning about the disadvantages of using the tent due to possible allergic reactions and aggravation of existing respiratory conditions.

Ohhh so that's why, it was required to bring an up to date medical certificate for sensible symptoms because it was aforementioned that with such, your strictly not allowed to enter. Which means, patients with a positive case of COVID-19 can only get access to the front porch of the ER while others who were asymptomatic as myself would only be able to penetrate on the inner entrance, connecting the room to the main hall. As what I could tell, this is surely one of the disinfectants that the hospital occasionally use.

From the other side, a crowd of medical workers with personal protective equipments scurried from one room to another, pushing a cart of diet food and prescription supplements with them.

Believe it or not, they were dreadfully quiet. There lips barely ever said a single line. The only sounds I'd ever heard was the whirring of wheels and the clank of their clog shoes.

As what I could discern from there on, I knew that I went pretty far just to interview in this kind of situation they were handling.

Realizing I wondered, 'Going back home?' 'Better than risking anything.'

So I simply turned around and intended to marched away, but then an idle geezer voice bombarded the hell out of me.

"You are Mr. Ferrel, aren't you?" A plump coal-haired police officer with a face shield covering his face, caught my attention.

I wanted to say no and reason out that I actually got a bad case of hypersensitivity; however, my boss's bindings kept on repeating far and wide my brain's amygdala. And definitely, I got the feeling that my punishment would be from head to toe, if I was to decline this so called project.

'Geez, I would have prefer if this lard-ass man would just stay silent' I scowled silently while playing with the zippers on my jacket.

Totally impatient of about anything, the guard's eyelids were half opened and his brows raised like he never had the slightest motivation to keep moving; even, he appeared to be somewhat displeased to ever intrude with me.

"Unfortunately, it's me." I bawled out disheartedly, forcing out a smile from my face.

It took him seconds to scan my face as if I was devilishly suspicious to him; while my heels were tapping on the cold floor, never getting a crap regarding his bearings.

Afterwards, he eventually sat by the nearest chair and rummaged down his tight pocket until he was able to find a key which actually fitted on the lock of his wooden drawer.

He digged his stuff throughout, throwing trash like soda cans and scratch papers out without shooting it into the garbage bin next to the bulletin board; till he founded what looked like a folded cadet blue plastic suit and handed me this with the face shield, which was dangling on the clothesline behind his desk.

He babbled apathetically like he was saying the same thing with the same people on a loop, "You will really look good with this outfit, I tell you... and when you're done, afterwards you could fly now to space--big time. Also, its squicky clean. No problem."

'I do assume that every word he said wouldn't have matched the way his face vary into.'

To be honest, I couldn't tell whether he's joking or not... even though it somewhat contrast with what he stated, since my appearance couldn't be really appreciated with the outfit wrapped around my body; and space--- was too remote for the Coronaventure.

I grabbed the package as I smiled awkwardly in return and saluted respectively to him, "Umm... it was a... pleasure to meet your, sir. Hopefully, I'll consider to pray for your early retirement." By then, my feet lead me where my thoughts don't wanted to be.

'Can't believe I made a description of my clothing earlier. Only to be covered with these fat suit. You wasted more than fifty words for this bro.'

Thereupon, I was waiting in front of the doctor's office beside their lounge, getting impatient every ring on my ear; and all I could articulate because of how much free time I once never had is that I'm too fed up with whereabouts all around my frontal lobe, getting sleepier the minute I closed my eyes.

It's the usual me. I felt vexed everytime I undergo isolation although being alone been on my nature since I was a kid. Cant help it. The area were so busy and everything when I myself was like chilling on the corner. Even though it was way preferable for them to not chatter with me, I couldn't just sit back and relax without feeling ignored.

Well anyways... since I had to much leisure time left, I will add bits of information about the current circumstances of Wingston General Hospital's medical crisis unit.

The emergency department began to be the isolation zone of the COVID 19 patients since the increase of positive cases on the metropolis area. According to the hospital's pharmacist formerly when I bought ascorbic acid from the dispensary, she informed me that numerous medical workers here were infected with the virus (which is the current state of any hospital out there).

She told me to be careful with the people I talk to because there might be a potential patient, whose case has been incubating for two to fourteen days before the manifestations appear. There's no telling if this person has actual syndromes of the said microorganism. A security guard even joined to jog my memory about the fact that twenty five doctors passed away along with thirty four nurses. That time, I was reminded I'm thoroughly confident that I shouldn't have been here, no matter how many times I had to type this on my phone's notepad.

The apertures overhead, allowed the passage of the moonlight through its opening. Judging the dark sky, the night had antecedently shown, carpeting the sun rays from the eyes of nature.

I cogitated as flashes of blurred memories skyrocketed infront of my eyes, 'When will I ever discern? No, would I even learn?' I'm not sure why I said that line but I guess the same pace been going through me...

Whatever it is, I felt guilty about it. Who knows what I've done? Another day... another night... Nothing ever crossed my mind but feelings that I can't discern myself.

"Excuse me." A young woman in a turquoise colored gear called from the nurse's station. At first, I didn't noticed her but as I locked my eyes with hers, I was assured that she was summoning me to the counter.

I was about to stand my feet, when suddenly she went in front of me while pointing her index finger at my protective shield, what seems to be lying beside me unattached to my face.

"Wear that." She insisted with a calm voice. Besides of the vision I'd pictured on how she look, I can't see her face rather than her ravishing cognac eyes, concealed by her goggles.

I forced a smile while gently grabbing the safety screen she persisted me to clothe myself in, "Sorry, I was being so negligent and inattentive." I giggled akwardly.

She beamed in returned or so does I anticipated even with the mask covering her mouth, "Are you knew here? It's the first time I'd seen you around... Perhaps, you're a volunteer?" She asked with a soothing voice like she was talking to a patient.

I fidgeted my fectral hair and answered, staying embarrassed for no practical reason, "As a matter of fact, I was bestowed to interview a person such as yours in relation with the circumstances today-"

I encouragingly asked her, "By some means, would you accept my favor?"

The woman had captured my proposal when she instantly backed off in response and waved in the air with spot-on refusal, "Ahhh... I can't. I-I'm not really good with these things-" She helplessly muttered a sorry.

Since I don't have the right to compel her in partaking with the document, I had to accept her declination, 'My bad... it would be hard to find someone who'll gladly participate.'

I sighed shakily, 'If only I was able to keep in contact first with the head and inquire him to recommend some confidential hand; then I could had have right away begin with the work in first light but here am I... and I only thought about that just now. Totally sucks.'

The lady could tell that I'm in trouble since the way I portrayed myself was too much of an open book like how my fist was clenching on it's own. What she came up to make me stand to my feet was too kneel down with beaming pleasure, staring deep into my eyes.

At this moment, I was stunned, 'What could she want in a time like this? Will she demand me to do stuff for her before I'll be able to proceed with my project?'

"I would like to introduce you around-" She stood up with a loud step on the cement floor; and walked continuosly down the hall, without turning around to watch me if I were following her. In the least, I didn't move an inch at all.

When she took her fifth step, she stopped and peaked from her shoulder, "Follow me, if you want to fulfill it... At least that I could do."

I pulled a smile from ear to ear, reverent by her obligation and laughed out like it was a joke, "Oh so? You've got other priorities, right?"

She went back at me again while rolling her eyes, annoyingly enough of my sceptical personality, then out of the blue she'd done that one thing I wouldn't approved.

She grabbed my gloved hands and pulled me through the desolate passageway, unrestraining me from the doubt I'd been caged into, "I won't let you down, regardless. I'm not someone who would leave you like that behind." She assured.

"You sure are demanding, for a stranger." I muttered.

Christina, the nurse's name and I strolled along the corridors, touring here and there the emergency ward while catching the atmosphere with my camera's lense. As expected, many patients were in an aggrieving breakdown. They felt as if they were manipulated by thousands of demons, who were awaiting their death. In other words, most of them were about to abandon hope.

But otherwise some younger patients were still ticktocking elsewhere. Once, we even meddle with an fifteen year old dancing to renegade and she was urging us to join her, which Christina was gladly to help. But to tell you the truth, only a few were collected and optimistic besides their faintest condition.

Most doctors and nurses were starting to surrender too. They were very much pressured and despondent alike, which makes us seem like someone they would lend their anger to. I even pitied so bad myself that I ensured to cut these scenes during the finishing touch.

Since I'm too dishearted with their unfortunate cause, Christina assured that everything's fine and basically, they were not at the mood to be serene with everything that goes around here. She appeared to look like as if she was used with her superior's actions; maybe because they shared the same goal which she could clearly understand, even though she still got the twinge of considere inside her.

When we ambled kilometer away from where we came from, I fretted, "It would have been preferable if I had brush aside this commission; after all, no one would have had the occasion to take part on this." I was hopeless. We'd been going around the ward for hours and- we weren't able to find one medical worker so far who was open for this event.

Christina shook her head with a yawn, "No worries, I know a doctor who will listen to us... I'm sure of it. Wonder if she is gonna take the offer though."

After going through so many steps, I was still so loss beyond hope; but then out of the blue I noticed that we sort of skipped another door. I asked permission from Christina while pointing my index to the clinic's name card Albert Scott, General Surgeon, "Ummm. This-"

She declined, walking without delay as if knowing that I'm about to request this anyway. She insisted with an honest voice, "Of course no, I don't want you to go into trouble." I baffled, Eh...

It was around eight o'clock when we arrived outside the specialist's consulting room which were the farthest we had reached so far. She previously mentioned that this room is where the doctor was staying during her break.

She also added with a frown, "Since medical personels weren't allowed to go back to their residences, we can only rest within respective rooms."

'Can you imagine how much they had to endure that? I couldn't tell why they had to take it this far just to save careless people...'

Christina banged gently on the wooden swing door twice without any hesitation, "Excuse me, Doc. I would like to speak with you."

As far as I'm concerned, how many times we'd knocked the door now? Like seriously, what if we're going to be ignored and scolded again? Now that I give up, I'm loosing sight of what I'm here for. 'There is no way at this rate that luck will overcame me.'

I elbowed her and silently whispered, "Let's get over it. You're going back to work and I'm going back home-"

I connected my thumb and index into a circle and hold my other fingers away from my palm while my eyes damp and eyebrows slightly pushing each other, "-Okay."

Christina eyed on me, inconceivable by my cowardness, "I did said that I'll do that for you, at least. Where's the trouble?"

My eyes stared and my nose turned into a sneer. 'This woman is unbelievable.' "You know what? You are so persistent on helping me-"

She mouthed a thank you in between, unattended by my sarcasm.

I stammered in continuation, "-like no another would be like you in times like this? Give me a break. I already said what's needed to be done. Thank you anyways."

Suddenly, her clenched teeth bared and her eyebrows pulled down in the middle.

She playfully retort in response as if I were some kid that lacks discipline, "Huh? Wasn't helping you a great thing? Stop beating around the bush. I only did this for you. I wouldn't waste my time deafening myself with your foolish cries, if it weren't for me helping you."

Hearing that, I began to boiled in resentment with steam arising from my earcanal. 'This wench...'

I responded, biting my lower lip. "You sure about that? I never cry for heaven's sake. It must have had gone into your head." I cracked my knuckles in attempt to start a frivolous argument.

She smirked sheepishly, underestimating my capability to fight, "I could tell that you're the easily giving up person and I hate to admit that people such as yours died earlier than they had hoped for. But anyways bring it on... It wouldn't hurt if I kick your member, right."

The harridan swung her arms, intertwining them in a cross at the front and bringing them back to the horizontal stretch position back and forth, ready to judoflip me with her gorilla eyes staring unpleasantly. When all of a sudden the door creaked, halting us from getting in a juvenile clash.

A brunette with a tied hair made an appearance, gandering at us. She wore a casual white oversized long sleeved tshirt and highwaist blue jeans. Her rectangle matte black frame glasses concealing her eyes and ivory skin glowed under the fluorescent lights. Her left eyebrow went higher than the other as if she was dumbfounded.

'Can't blame her though. Its not everyday you hear two children wrangling in your doorstep especially with quarantine in the house.'

Her eyelids were puffy and swollen with shadows under, and her hair carelessly pointing in different directions.

She could barely open her mouth because of her noticebly weary feature, "Did I heard a dog and a cat quarrelling here? Or is it just me?" 'Dog and cat? Who?'

Christina snickered, "Sorry Doc, this man was an idiot. He could literally had a bad temper in dealing such little things."

I was too badly shaken, that anytime I could burst out like a volcano; though I was persevering to never unleashed my anger to what she so called 'little things.'

The doctor adjusted the lenses of her spectacles while ignoring me, identifying that chick's face. "How can I help you.....Celestia? Any chestpains lately?"

'Celestia' replied, "Actually, It's Christina. About the chestpains.... hopefully, its gone for a while now."

"Then why-?"

She turned her head on the right, fixing her chocolate eyes to mine, "Another patient?"

Christina nodded respectfully with her lips pinched and eyes cast down teasingly, "This pansy man has the Peter pan syndrome, Doc. May I ask what remedy is good for this? Maybe, ibuprofen...or anti-depressant?"

'Peter pan syndrome? Never heard of that? Wait... is she-?'

The doctor gaped as if she rarely had met an animal like me. Her eyes widened and her chin pulled like she was pitying me, "That's unfortunate...-" She picked up her black pen from her messy desk and scribbled words I couldn't fathom in the prescription paper. Black pen-

Unlooked for, my pupils dilate and my respiratory rate increased than normal, striving to steer clear off its sharp tip.

A placating man's voice, haunted me, 'You disappoint me, Aiden.'

I trembled painfully, squeezing my lungs and heart from breathing. My muscles beneath my skin felt sore and agonizing and my thoughts squabbled with resounding words that were stowed behind my memories.

Without perceiving my awful state, she handed me the paper with a yawn in between, "-No kidding I would be glad to help but your condition is not in my expertise. I would suggest you to go to the psychiatry department for consulta-" Her words cut as she instantly notice my infirmity.

Without no further ado while trying to discern the reason of this, she scrutinized my behavioral path and actions supporting the cause. She untied the ropes, considering about when or where it takes place until her eyes darted on her own ball-point pen. Meanwhile Christina 'assisted' her, cackling nonstop on the background like a pig being impotently hashed to cubes.

The doctor hid the pen on her pocket and brushed the crumbs out of her lab coat, "Christina please, there is no time to joke around." She ordered rigurously, instructing her to knock off.

'Good good. I like this woman.' Christina in a sudden zipped her mouth and her eyes enlarged in confusion. 'She is a nurse. Doctor's orders is what an attendant like her obey. Great.'

The specialist emplaced her palms on my shoulder, gently tapping my consciousness to the present. Her appealing smile warmed the air, oozing the maddenly notions in every corner of my sanity, 'She's beautiful... eh?'

"It's a pleasure to meet you. I can help you in any way... You are here for it, I assume?" She told me.

Unforeseenly, I evaded eye contact and blushed while scratching my hair in embarrassment, "Doc. I'm not really worth your time and- everything. If I were you, I wouldn't participate to such." I oppressed a smile, tugging on my round collar.

At that instant, a big blow of pain surged on my phallus, which brought me to my knees, 'What the?!'

It was quick. I was not able to spot that someone who had have the guts to earn my knuckle punch. As what I could distinguish, whomever must have had boot between my legs, 'Whomever...'

I stared at the doctor who was in a daily basis of shock. Her eyes wondering if I was okay. She doesn't appeared to be that someone. Whereas, Christina was whistling suspiciously like any jerk would do when they believed to be unimpeachable or not a subject to blame. 'It can only be one of them.'

A flashback abruptly went on my mind. "It wouldn't hurt if I kick your member, right."

I examined them side by side, calculating their likeliness of setting out a heinous crime; in spite of the fact that Christina was axiomaticaly the suspect to this instance.

The doctor unconvincably glimpse at her like she was informing her to better stay out of my sight before I'll turn into a fury. As usual, she doesn't mind- I can't presume that I knew this woman already on our first met. Showing her true colors outrageously like that, her blind date must have had a loathsome time accustomating with her.

I cursed under my breath, triggering a Jeet Kune Do powerup, 'Christina... any last words?' I heeded.

Christina cracked up insanely, swatting the air like she got issues killing a mosquito. "Look at him, Doc. He is gonna pull a Bruce Lee."

She perpetually laughed, throwing to the floor. Unimpressed with my exploit, I resisted the goad to actuate my rage. Whereas the doctor reacted with a genuine smile, murmuring the word 'kids'.

It was nine o'clock when we settled inside the doctor's office, chatting about the crisis today and its profound causes. At that moment, I told the doctor about the basis of my arrival and convinced her to cooperate in the documentary. I supposed that she will refuse my proposal like any other health personnel in the hospital; but on the contrary without second thoughts, she accepted my offer. She stated that it would be a good option for her. Any else, we were joking around about how we will run this project.

Notwithstanding I was going on with the conversation, my eyes kept on darting around as if it was the first time in ever that I was able to admire any interior adornment.

If I would had have bought a new house, I would scheme out the same way this room was designed, due to its modernly appeal and congenial quality. The length of the room is around ten feet and the width was the same size of an average master bedroom.

Several certificates and oil- paintings were framed on the pastel grey wall. A black leathered flat sofa bed with three geometrical throw pillow was positioned at the right side of the doorway, taking in the frontage of the bay window, which was displaying the canvas colors of the night.

The high class ash wooden desk was erected alongside the window, facing the examining bed. An ivory vintage cabinet stood behind the desk with a drake desk lamp attached. Bunch of hospital supplies including western medicine books jammed to spaces.

Conceding the untidy image, the oregano fragrance and outstanding ambience was on top. Unlike most hysterical-sustaining quarters, this area has the homey vibe; although it's too much of a stretch for a medical operating room.

By that time, I was on cloud nine whereas the wench was now abiding with her labor; so I and the doctor were the only one left inside.

On account of my lively expression, the brunette did not failed to recognize the reason out of it. She sighed with a levelheaded grin, "Detesting with each other at first met-"

She mockingly chuckled, "-You two must have had a natural attraction with each other." 'You had no idea how much I was exasperated with her filling in like this.'

I ranted with my nostrils flaring, "No way! I don't give a damn about her. Nobody wouldn't want the window of opportunity to mingle with a chick like her!"

"Woah... woah... there you go. Why are you taking things that serious?" She shutted me off with a playful slap on my shoulder and chortled captivatingly.

I smirked shamefully while veiling my eyeballs from the light of the night, 'Now, what am I going to do. My heart is jumping to pieces.'

"To my way of thinking, you must have had worked out that I am a peevish and cantankerous type of guy... I'm literally irritable, when things didn't go my way."

She chuckled with her eyelids nearly shut, "Manifestly-"

Her eyes widen with curiosity, "-Did you not confirm it with Christina back then?"

I rolled my eyes and griped, "Tch... with that woman, I would prefer to contradict these feat than letting her provoke me."

"As expected from someone like you." She exhaled agreeingly.

The doctor went to her desk and arranged the files lying over it. Her gorgeous sparkling amber hair swinging in the cool sea breeze, "Christina... is inevitably that kind of person. Because of her personality, lots of diggers who flirted didn't in the least fall in with her."

I spared no effort to make a sarcastic smile, "Who will find her attractive?- Maybe, their eyesight need a little fix."

She sighed wearily, "She used to be sought after by man and woman when she was still in high school. Even today, she-"

"Like I say they got bad eyesight." I interrupted with a scowl on my face.

The doctor rolled her eyes with an intimately warm giggle, "Sure- I've got no time to alter your outlook, regarding Christina-"

She suddenly scanned the top until the bottom of my clothes, "However, wouldn't it be finer if you will take off your ppe? 'Cause you know, we're far from contamination here at least. It will be more relax for you."

'That's it. I've been waiting for years to be finally authorized by a personage to escape me from this sickening jail.'

I nodded with a helpless and appreciative smile, "Hmm... So can I right now?"

She bobbled her head in approval, "You can-"

She added straight away, "-But first allow me to introduce myself." I gazed, willing to get to know her.

She stood straight and offered a hand, "My name is Kelsy Hepburn, a cardiotherapic surgeon."

'Kelsy... what an alluring name.'

I smirked and gave a jiggle on her palm, "I am Aiden Ferrel from Planet Core Media."

'Meeting her today...

I'm looking forward to be with her in the near future.'