Chapter 19

I stood there frozen and completely confused about what was going on right now. I stepped out for a minute and this is what happens. A few people broke up the fight and Ryan and Seth both were a bloody mess.

"What the fuck happened?" I turned to Leah. She tried to cover up her laughter with a few coughs before putting on a serious face.

"Sorry, Ryan started it."

I glared at Ryan and waited for an explanation that never came. Instead, he wiped the blood away from the corner of his mouth with his thumb and retreated out back.

"Seth, are you ok?" I held his face to examine it and he pulled away slowly. I furrowed my brows as he held my shoulders and leaned in pressing a kiss to my cheek.

"I have to go, but I'll text you later, ok?"

I nodded and watched him walk away and leave out the front door. Everyone else went back to partying as if nothing happened, but I was pissed, and not in a partying mood at all. I went to the kitchen to grab the first aid kit and went out back where Ryan sat at one of the pool chairs with his face in his hands, muttering indecipherable things under his breath.

"Ryan."

He tensed up and then climbed to his feet to leave and I stood in his path. "Sit down."

Ryan let out a frustrated breath and turned to leave.

"SIT!" I warned, pointing my finger at the chair.

He stopped and shook his head before stepping back and reclaiming his seat. "Try not to hurt me too much."

I rolled my eyes and poured alcohol on a cotton ball and pressed it against his face.

He winced, "Fuck I said don't hurt me."

"Suck it up you big baby, this is your fault."

"I'm sorry ok I didn't mean for it to go as far as it did."

I nodded and continued wiping the blood. His eyes burned into mine making me uncomfortable. "You know that I'm sorry, right?"

"You already said that."

"No, I'm sorry about the Clair situation, about ruining your day. I'm sorry about all of it."

"Ok."

He furrowed his brows. "Ok?"

"I don't wanna talk about this right now."

His arms wrapped around my lower back as he pulled me closer between his legs. "I'm sorry."

"Ryan, let go of me." I pulled away.

His hands raked up and down the back of my bare thighs sending shivers through my body.

"I can't take this, you being mad at me. It's driving me insane and I won't function properly if you leave me again."

"Don't be dramatic."

He got down on his knees and wrapped his arms around my thighs."What are you doing?" I looked down at him confused.

He laid his head against my stomach and pulled me closer. "Please, forgive me."

I don't have time for this. He was wrong for what he did and now Seth might not ever want anything to do with me again. What he did was childish and uncalled for. I finished cleaning him up and then helped him to his feet. "I'm gonna go back to the party and try to have fun. Do you want to go upstairs and rest?"

"No, I'll just hang back here for now." He lay down beside the pool and glanced up at me. "That old guy doesn't deserve any of your time, I hope you know that."

"I already told you we're just friends."

He sighed and threw his arm over his face to shield it. "Just remember who needs the little blue pill to get it up and who doesn't."

I went back into the house in search of more drinks to distract myself from my thoughts and feelings. God, I hate this.

"One of you guys will have to apologize first

"One of you guys will have to apologize first. This can not continue any longer. Did you know for these past few days he's been over at my house getting drunk and acting like a lunatic? And I had to deal with it all. Me! and it was torture." Leah babbled on and dropped onto my bed on her back, dramatically.

"There's nothing to apologize for. He is who he is and I don't have to deal with it. At least not right now."

It's been days since the altercation between Ryan and Seth and every day since then has been insufferable. We see each other at work, but he doesn't try to speak to me, not even a glance my way. Nothing. I'd like to think that he was just giving me my space, but no he was being petty. He had no reason to be upset with me when he was the one who couldn't keep his hands to himself. I had a very valid reason.

The morning of my birthday he tried waking me up and I pretended to be asleep just to avoid speaking to him. Seth sent a text hours after the little fight basically letting me know he liked me a lot, but he doesn't think it's a good idea to come around anymore. The drama was a lot for him and he's too grown and shouldn't have to come home to his kids with a black eye which I 100% agree with.

"We're going to your father's wedding in a few days. That's gonna be a weird couple of days if one of you doesn't apologize now."

I studied my reflection in my beauty mirror, the dark circles under my eyes becoming more prominent due to the lack of sleep I was getting. I sighed and looked over at Leah. "He has to do it. I spent years never talking to him and I'll do it again and don't you dare defend him again," I quickly said once I saw her mouth open again. She shut it and groaned.

"Fine, change of subject. You know that guy I've been seeing that I didn't have the guts to tell you about?"

I stopped what I was doing and gave her my undivided attention. "How dare you keep such important information from me."

"I swear it wasn't supposed to be anything serious; just fun here and there, but I actually like him. Like really really like him and guess what?"

"You're pregnant?! You should know better than that!"

"Fuck no my parents would murder me." She laughed. "Sergio thinks I have potential and even recommended me to someone to check it out, so I can get acknowledged by famous people and stuff. Just imagine me in Hollywood living it up with Cindy Sherman or something." She flailed her arms and legs around excitedly.

"I'm happy for you!" I jumped on the bed beside her and pulled her close. "As long as I always get the best friend discount."

She peered up at me and shook her head.

Leah left for school and I took the subway to work like I've been doing for the past few days. Traffic has been crazy and I wouldn't hesitate to go off on someone with how much I've been bottling up.

Minutes passed after I got to work and I kept wondering where Ryan was. He was supposed to be here for his shift and he was never late.

"Morning." Brea beamed.

"Morning, what're you doing here? I thought you worked later."

She clocked in and then took Ryan's spot next to me. "Dave called me in. Something about Ryan not feeling well, so I'm filling in," she replied with a smile.

Not feeling well? That's bull.

I finished up with my customer and then checked my phone to see if he tried to contact me, but there was nothing. I don't even know why I thought there would be anything from him.

After work, I went straight to Leah's house to unwind and chill. When I got there I didn't expect to see Ryan and Clair.

"You had a good day at work?" Zane asked, following me to the kitchen.

"I wouldn't say it was a good day, it was ok." I pulled a bottle of water from the fridge.

"Hey, V," Clair waved and smirked at me.

I said hey back just to be friendly and shot a look at Ryan as I climbed the stairs to Leah's room. He stared at me and then turned his attention back to the tv, ignoring me again.

"They're turning your home into a hotbox downstairs and you're up here doing what?" I peeked over her shoulder and noticed her going through her file of photographs. "Did you finish your project already?"

She nodded her head and continued typing away. "This is so surreal. They want a folder of my best work, so I'm just going through them to choose my best ones. I didn't think anyone would even like my work." She rested her head on her palm and smiled at the screen.

"You got this, girl." I kissed the top of her head and took a seat on the end of her bed. She finished up what she was doing and closed her laptop, turning to me with a grin.

"What?"

"Let's go downstairs, so you guys can talk now."

Ugh.

We walked back downstairs and Zane was on his Xbox playing 2k with Ryan while Clair stood on the side dancing to no music with a blunt in her hand. She noticed us watching her and giggled before sitting back down. "Guys sit down and talk to me."

I took the seat furthest away from her and leaned my head on my palm.

"So are you excited about the wedding? I heard it's taking place in the Bahamas of all places." Clair spoke, grinning wide.

"Yeah, I've never been there before but I just hope I don't run into any other assholes. God knows I have enough in my life," I chuckled slightly and looked over at Ryan who tensed up.

Ryan cleared his throat and stood up, "And on that note, I'm gonna head out."

I looked over at Leah and she frowned and shook her head in disappointment. What? It's not like I was lying and we both knew that. She silently told me to go after him with a jerk of her head, but I stayed glued to my seat.

It wasn't until Ryan turned to look at me over his shoulder and I caught a glimpse of sadness in his eyes that I decided to stop this whole petty game and go after him. I felt bad, but don't get it twisted, he was still wrong. I slipped out the door behind him just as he approached his truck. He had no intentions of sticking around, but I couldn't let him leave yet.

He stared at me as he climbed into the passenger seat and I quickly walked to the door and held it open. "Can we talk?" I muttered under my breath, staring at the steering wheel to avoid his gaze.

"Oh, so now you want to speak again? I thought you enjoyed playing the silent game." His deep voice was laced with hurt.

I bit the inside of my cheek wondering if I should apologize. "I was hurt okay? You were fooling around with Clair and I'm not the type of girl who wants you to choose. It's insulting. You should want to want me and only me." My voice cracked as I tried to fight the tears that threatened to spill. This was so embarrassing, no way am I about to cry over a boy. I don't even cry over spilled food and that's worse.

"Get in." He unlocked the passenger side and I ran around, climbing in. He shut his door and exhaled. "Clair and I aren't together, so there's no need for you to be jealous or-"

"I'm not jealous." I cut him off. "Just hurt."

"Ok and that's why I didn't want whatever this is between us to go too far because I care about you too much."

"Why did you even want to throw me a party? I expected to spend time with you maybe even a little makeout sesh, but no. You were all up on her like you were trying to rub it in."

"And you were with that old man." He retorts. "If you wanted all my attention you could've just told me that." He added with a smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

I nudged him away and rolled my eyes. "Oh, shut up. I don't need your attention."

"You sure?" He pulled me closer and I leaned into his touch. His hand traveled down to my waist and his lips left kisses down my neck.

"Ok, stop," I laughed and pushed him off.

I wrapped my arms around his waist and leaned against his shoulder. He placed one last kiss on my head and then relaxed. "Seriously though no more fooling around. It's hurting us both and I don't think we're ready for a relationship again."

"I agree, but it doesn't mean I want to see you and Clair together everywhere I go, ok?"

He hummed in response and rested his head on top of mine. There was something else I wanted an answer to that was important. "Uh...so why exactly did you fight Seth?"

"Because I was jealous. I have the balls to admit it."

I grinned and looked up at him. "Well, you don't have to worry about him anymore."

"Good, more time for me."