Ernilla member of Faction 7

"Emilla." I heard my mother called out my sister's name. I followed the sound of her voice. It lead me to the front porch where she is scooping snow that had accumulated in the stairs leading to our door. I looked around and waited for Emilla to come rushing infront of me. My guess is she didn't heard. "Emilla." My mom called again. This moment, Emilla came rushing downstairs from her room. I looked at her as she stepped down the stairs and ran to the door where mom is waiting. I followed her to the front porch. She scooch down to mom and quietly look at how mom is scooping snow. Mom saw me and looked at me. "Did you thought I called you as well, that's why you came rushing here?" Mom asked as she took Emilla's hand and demonstrated how she should be scooping snow. "It is not my fault that you named us both ending with the same syllable." I said and scooch down. Looking how thin my sister's hands are compared to my Mother. My mom giggled and took her hands from Emilla's. Wiped them to her brown skirt to brush the snow off. Reached my face and touched it. "I don't know how you can make humor out of almost anything. Why are you here? Aren't you supposed to be helping your father?" She returned her hands to Emilla's. Emilla looked at her, trying to demonstrated the move she just got taught. "Emilla, don't scoop downwards. Tilt the scooper upwards, in that way you'll get more ice with spending less energy." Mom touched her again and scooped ice. "Don't you find this boring?" Emilla took her little eyes on me. I always thought that even though we're twins, I am much more bigger than her. I used to joke about it to mom that when we were in her tummy I used to juggle all the food. Barely giving any to Emilla. Emilla believed it until we were 5. "No. I find it nice dealing with snow instead of father's paper." My father is the trainers' researchers. Before the trainers imposed a law, my father researches it. The advantage and disadvantage it may took. I think that's the whole faction 7 fathers job. But my father was the head of the researchers. Which make it hard not to take part of. "Ernilla?" I heard my father calling me. "Have you tabulated all those data I've been asking you to do?" My mother stood up and helped me stood up. "Follow your father. You know he need those." I groaned. I never knew anything the trainers liked to imposed. Father only asks me to tabulate which owns the most percentage. Advantage or Disadvantage? I turned my back away from them to follow the voice of my father. Until I heard Emilla said, "I am so excited at my birthday Mother. Is anyone else invited like Jaden, Mason and my other friends?" I faced them again. "I don't get it why you find our birthday exciting. It happens every year." I always hated my birthday. It only reminded me that I grew older. I grew bigger. I hated it because Emilla stayed the same height over the last 2 years. If Emilla believed it until we're 5, I still believe it right now. "Exactly, Ernilla. It happens only once a year." My mom shrug me off. "Ignore Ernilla, She always hated her birthday, but that doesn't mean you'll have to hate yours. Hurry on Ernilla. Your father is waiting for you." I ran inside and find father buried in papers. I went inside my room and took the tabulated datas he asked for. As I was coming down, I saw her laptop screen flashed. "One month away from the 22nd trainers." I ignored the texts and drop the papers on top of his table. "Father I already made even the ones I needed to pass for the next week." My father smiled. "I am so glad I named you after me, Ernilla." I smiled. I glaced at his laptop screen. "Also one month away from announcing the new chosen contenders."

I opened my tv to watch the news. I used to dread the news because it always broadcast only the news inside our faction. None of the other faction. But my father will always reprimand me. "Back in my youth, we are not allowed to watch the news. And back in my father's youth, news wasn't even allowed to be created." I will always ignore him. Saying I don't need anymore news in our faction. Nothing ever happens here. I like it that way though. But I didn't want to be blind on what is happening outside. My door opened and I saw Emilla coming inside. "Emilla, what are you doing here?" I asked. Emilla never went inside my room because she priorities privacy. And she told me that she will never go inside my mine if I don't promise that I will stop going into hers. "I know why you hated this birthday. And I didn't want mom to know." I stand up and closed the door. "Shhh, mom might hear you!" I assisted her into my bed and brush her hair. "You were born 3 minutes early. You hate it twice this time because of the chosen." Emilla is right. I hated it twice. If not celebrating our birthday could mean that I won't have to turn 15, i would allow it. I didn't want to be one of the contenders. "How did you know?" She looked at me straight in the eye. "You're not the only one who peeks at father's paper. I also peek when I am incharge of cleaning their room." I long sit so she could lie in my shoulder. I stared at my feet longer than hers. "Why didn't you want to be a contender? It's like school. The difference is you compete with your classmates." I brushed her hair again before replying. "In school you don't compete to win. In school, they won't task you to rule a realm in case you won."

I let Emilla sleep in my room. I covered myself with sheets and inserted my earphones. I wanted to rewatch the news I wanted to watch before Emilla came into my room. I saw the city justice hall in background as the reporter announces the time. "Ladies and Gentlemen, whatever faction you belong, we all know you have been waiting for this." He walk sidewards to a countdown clock. "And yes you are right, we are 29 days, 7 hours and 2 minutes away from the next announcement of our 22nd trainers. But as you all know. This means the search for the 23rd contenders had now ended, and as we announce the the new trainers, there will also be birth of the 23rd contenders." The background changed. A different reporter had appeared on the screen. "Let's check on the other side of our territory, we had our very own Ms. Tifanny Robbins to check on our top trainees. One month away from the announcement." The camera changed its focused from the 1st reporter to the second. "Good evening, Mr. Lucas Ordain, in the back of me are the ten trainees. But with all respect. I will first interview the top 1 trainee before announcing all of them. Francis Smith, a member of the faction 10." She welcome a almost grown man. To my guess, age is around 21. If the chosen lasts for 3 years. He must have enter the chosen at the age of 18. The contenders are not announced. But once they became a trainee. Which is a month before the entitlement, that is the only chance they got to show their faces to the whole realm. "Hi, Ms. Robbins. I'm just glad to be representing my faction! Hiya Faction 10. Be proud of me." This is also the only news about other factions that we will get to receive. I don't know with the other faction. But here in my faction, We don't get to hear news from the other factions. Meaning the top trainee for this time came from the faction 10. Funny how faction 10 lies beneath us. But I never get to see anyone that came from the factions. I believed that we are the only faction until I was 7. "How's your stay in the contenders house?" Ms. Tiffany asked. The boy smiled before answering. "There is a lot to study, a lot of mental breakdowns. But I am glad I get to eat. I get to eat what I want--" the reporter stopped him. The boy let out a regret laugh. "That is not what I am asking, Mr. Smith." The reporter said emphasizing the word smith. "Oh, I am sorry. I am, I mean all the other contenders were great. Oh yeah, we're called trainees now. I mean, they are all great. Although 1 is really a tough contender. Have you seen the scoreboard? I actually thought I wouldn't be standing infront of you now." The top trainee said. Even though all of the contenders are shown and announced 1 month prior to entitlement, only the top trainee are allowed to say a few words. The camera will only show who represented which faction. But only the top trainees words are worth the camera time. I didn't know the chosen actually exists. I didn't know anything 4 months ago. But I overheard my mom and dad talking about it. I had spent my time researching about it eversince. I didn't want to enter the chosen without having any knowledge at all. "Thank you for the wonderful words. Mr. Smith. Now tune in and watch the other trainees--" I turn off my phone. I only needed to see the top trainee. Only the top 5 contender will be offered a seat in the government. But they are shown all a month before. Apparently, the study makers prioritize last minute changes to the scoreboard.

3 days after, Emilla and I celebrated our birthday. All of Emilla's friends came. I was hoping some of mine will come. Upon hearing the chosen during my father and mother's talk, I started to cut off my friends. I didn't want anyone else to occupy my mind except my family. Father gave Emilla a silver necklace that has a snow pendant. My father teased her since she always scoop ice with mother. He gave me a wrist band. A black wrist band. I had questions on why they gave Emilla a girly necklace. And they gave me a black wristband. But I fear that it is not the answer I wanted to hear so I refrained myself from asking. The party ended with both corners of Emilla's mouth are up, but not mine. The chosen is now 26 days away. Father and mother hadn't told me about it yet. But if what I heard is right. I am bound to join the chosen. I don't want to leave. If I get to choose between father's research and the chosen, I'd rather deal with my father's research. I sat on our swing placed at our front porch. I am swinging my feet back and forth. Waiting for last minute guests. I know I didn't invite anyone. But since my friends and I live inside a same neighborhood, I hope one of them will drop by. I stood up, checked the clock inside. Seeing that it is already past 8, nobody could have remembered. Otherwise, they maybe too mad at me for cutting them off. I walk towards our door until I heard something. "Nila." A male voice said. Only one person calls me that name. I immediately look back and saw Dion, his hair still dripping wet, wearing a denim jacket and a black pants. I'm guessing he told his parents that he just went out for a swim, wet his hair so it will be totally believable. I opened our gate and let him come inside. We sat by our swing. "I didn't expect you would come." I told him as soon as we sat. He let out a small giggle. "Yeah, but seeing you here, I knew you hoped I would come." I replied with a laugh. Nobody knows me better than Dion. The things I can't confide to Emilla, I can easily share to Dion without any restrictions. "Is that a black wristband?" He said the moment he saw my father's gift. I pulled my fist towards my chest and encircled my left wrist with my right hands. "Yes, they were given to me by my Father." He smiled at me and took something in his pocket. He took out a blue jewelry box. He opened it and a rose gold bracelet had appeared. He maybe saw the shock in my face because he gave me his cocky look. He took the bracelet out. Only then I noticed it's charm. A rose gold seashell entangled in a rope. A boat's rope. He put it on my right wrist. "I was so sure that Sir Ernest will give you necklace that's why I chose to buy bracelet instead. I should have just bought necklace." I stared at it as it goes down to my arm. "It's beautiful." I hug him and I felt him embrace back. "Happy 15th birthday, Ernilla." I smiled at him and watch him look at my bracelet as it goes down to my forearm. "Don't you think it's too light?" I asked jokingly. "Don't, I am the only friend you got left, A thank you is enough." He said giggling and stood up. I felt a water drop on my wrist from his hair. "I need to go back. I only said I went out for swimming, your place is too far from mine." I stand up and helped him opened our gate, he was about to go out when I ask. "What do you know about the chosen?" I asked. I saw worry in his eyes the moment I asked. I regretted immediately that I had the guts to ask. He went near me. "Where did you hear that? Is this why you decided to cut all of us? Are you this season's contender?" He held my elbow so tight. I am starting to become afraid on the fact that he'd be reacting to this. I was about to answer when I heard my father's voice. "Ernilla, it's cold outside. Come inside. Let Dion go home." I immediately push Dion towards the outside of the gate, closed it and went back inside. I bid my goodbye, the worry is still seen in his face. I went inside. "I didn't expect you to ask Dion regarding the chosen. You could have ask me." I heard my father said as I am climbing the stairs. I ignored him. I didn't want the filtered version of the most talked contest. I don't want to hear it from someone who couldn't even tell me I am this season's contender the moment they found out about it, and that was 4 months ago.

4 MONTHS AGO

"Ernilla, I told you, only write why it became an advantage, not write why it became a disadvantage. I know I lectured you long enough to remember these little things, why did you get it wrong again for the 3rd time?" Father asked as he is scanning through the tabulated data I had pass. I purposely made it that way. Disadvantages are the most important part of the papers for me. If we know what to turn away from, we will know better what laws to be imposed. Looking at just advantages are so wrong. It is okay if they will be compared. But if you will neglect something, let it be disadvantages, no one will appreciate who benefits what unless someone's pain is seen. "I am sorry Father. I will create them again." I said hoping that he will return to me the papers I had created. I saw him crumble the papers and throw them in his trash bin. I wanted to not comply. But I wouldn't do anything my father doesn't want me to do. I immediately went inside my room. Waited out until father had completely left the room before entering his office. I crawled towards his room until I reached his trash bin. I was only out for 4 hours and Father had already thrown so much paper. I pick them up one by one. It is hard to look at them with their words printed on the other side. Good thing I used the high quality printing, seeing words I had written as identification of my papers. I counted my papers. 9, I still need one more piece. I pick papers again until I saw a crumbled paper. On the other side of the paper was written in bold letters, "Ernilla San Diego." I knew it was not my place to took the paper. But since it had my name written on it, I might as well take it as my property. I didn't to find the last paper, I stood up and took all of the papers. I went down again as I saw father and mother through the window talking. "Don't you think she should know it now?" I heard my mother's voice. I was waiting for a reply but I only heard my father's footsteps. "She's in nowhere ready." This moment I could no longer hear his footsteps. "That is the point Ernest! We need her to be ready, we should prepare her-" I was waiting for reply until I saw the edge of Emilla's slipper through the end table. I clearly ran too fast I mistaken her slippers for mine. "Let's talk inside our room." Father told Mom. The moment I no longer hear their footsteps, I went out. I head straight to my room, opened the letter which I saw my name first.

Tiffany Robbins

Human Resource Team Member

Faction 7 Legal Recruiter

Good Morning, Mr. Ernest San Diego and Mrs. Prescilla San Diego. Today, we are please to inform you that the next season contenders have been chosen, in the same way as the tradition. I know I won't have to narrow its details for you, still, I am glad to inform you that your Eldest girl had been hand picked to be this season's contenders. I will again send another mail electronically that states the requirements before your daughter actually lives in the contenders' house. I hope you are as happy as I am now. This mail is no longer needed as a check in ticket of your daughter, I had already sent the other package for your daughter's details with regards of living arrangement and ticket that she will be needing upon entry. I know this may sound personal but--

The noted ended there. I wanted to read more. I wanted to know more. Why did father had to rip the paper in half. More importantly, why did he had to hide the fact that I am the next contender? I was happy. I didn't want to be apart from my family in 3 years. In fact, I know nothing with regards to the chosen. They never discussed it with us. I never knew. I doubt if Emilla knew. I was the only one dealing with Father's papers. How else would she knew? I heard footsteps approaching my door so I tucked in the papers under my pillow. Turned off my light and pretended I was asleep. I heard my door opened. I listen as footsteps gets louder. The person who came in my room sat down on my bed. I know this scent. It belongs to my mom. A sweet, enchanting scent that screams comfort. "I love you. I know you. Even if we come to a point that I no longer knew you, I will still choose to love you." My mother said and kissed my forehead.

PRESENT

20 days away from the chosen, I still couldn't believe it that my father is still refusing to teach me on how I should deal with being this season's contender. I don't even want to be one, but the very least, I should know what I am dealing head on. News is only reporting how the contenders are graded, but not how they were picked. I atleast had to know before joining the chosen. We were in the middle of having breakfast, Usually after father got his morning food, He will divide the work we will do. Mom and Emilla meanwhile had to divide the house chores. But considering I already finished this week's and next week's data tabulating, I kinda hope that he will lecture me regarding the chosen. or the least admit to my face that I am this season's contender. I shove the last pickle on my plate inside my mouth until Father spoke. "You had no task today Ernilla. You can help out with Emilla and your mom." Father said while sipping his coffee and reading his today's load of research. I saw the corners of my sister's mouth are up again. She stood up, took the finish plates and brought them to the sink. "You take today's snow." Emilla said and happily hum while walking back towards us. I looked at father as he carefully scan letters after letters. It's not what I wanted to hear for today, but seeing Emilla's smile. I refrained myself from talking.

I am scooping ice alone while Mom and Emilla are washing the dishes. Father approached me in our front porch and sat on the swing. "Is it okay if I ask my daughter why she asked her friend details regarding the chosen?" Father said as he stared at the piles of snow I had already took. I took pause from scooping snow, wipe off the snow on my pants and sat beside him. "I saw it on your laptop. It sounded serious." I lied. In fact, I saw my name being one of the contenders. "I have always told you that the ten factions are governed by the chosen trainers." I looked at him staring at the snow I had stock piled before looking at me. "When you were a kid, I used to tell you all sorts of stuff regarding the chosen. But back then, you and Emilla never really cared." He returned his gaze back to the snow. I waited patiently for him to continue the story. "They are called trainers, because they are trained to govern us. Ever wonder what each member of the faction is called?" I stopped and think. At school we are called Students. But I tried with all my might to remember what my teacher had called my father and all of the elders. "The subordinates." Father continued when his words when I didn't answer. "We were all called subordinates, and our duty to the chosen are simple. Give them the people to govern for, and they will do their duty. Without us, there is no people who they can function for." He returned his gaze on me. "The chosen is a way of making sure that the people in the seat of the government, is trained enough according to our laws to be capable of ruling 10 different factions." He finished his words and waited for mine. If I was one of the chosen contenders and It didn't sound bad enough, I had nothing to be scared of. One thing I do not like though is I have to part away from them. "It sounded so simple Father, what do I have to do there? I saw on the news about scoreboards and lectures." As soon as I said that, Father touched my hand. "Yes, it is so simple. But it changes when you enter the contenders house. When you deal with the different faction members, You will see how different our faction is." He said and let go of my hand and pointed the bucket of snow infront of me. "It maybe for you, scooping ice maybe easy for you but not for others due to certain circumstances. But Ernilla, Promise me, when you become one of the contenders. You will not only look after yourself. But for other factions as well..." Father stand up leaving me in awe. He knew that I knew? He smiled at me before entering the house. "Your Mother doesn't know that you know. Let's keep it that way." He said and then completely disappeared through the door.

I finished scooping ice and heard the door behind me opened. I saw Emilla sat on the porch swing. "Wow, you're already done. I wish you could scoop ice everyday, I hate it. It freezes my hands." I stood up, wipe the snow flakes out of my hands and sat beside her, took her hands and compared them with mine. Emilla really got thin hands compared with me and Mom. Maybe that's why she had troubles scooping snow every now and then. I lied on top of her shoulders, but due to height difference that is making me scoop down more than usual, I just hugged her. "Ernilla." I heard her say. I looked at her. Her freckles are showing more today than usual. Her green eyes are lit up I clearly saw myself on her eyes even the snow on my shoulder is seen. "If I am Father or Mother, I would not send my kids to the northern side and become one of the contenders." What she said hit me. She didn't knew I was the one being sent as the contender. She thought both of us had equal chance of being sent out. "Is that why you're worried right now?" I said. I watched her face shook. "Yes. I have been worried since we turn 15. Because that's when one of us had to enter the chosen." I hug her again. She lied her head on top of my shoulder but the snow caught up in her brown wavy hair. She brush them off me. I wanted to tell her that I will be joining the contenders. I will be representing our faction. But I didn't want her to think that I'd be doing this for her. She always thought she was the weaker twin. She always thought she was uncapped for anything other than Mom's chores that's why she never make any of father's papers. "I love you." I said and hugged her even tighter. I wanted her to know I am with her even when I go away.

19 days away from the next season of contenders, Father gathered the family to announce that I was one of this season's contenders. Emilla cried upon hearing the news. Mother tried to calm her down. I wanted to be the one to calm her but Mother stopped me. I tried to sound as shock as Emilla. Although the news didn't really shocked me, and I didn't cried because I knew that would make me weak in front of Father and since I am about to be alone in the contenders house without their guidance, I refused to cry. Since then I have been watching news about the chosen. But other than showing the face of the newly promoted Trainees, No other news have brought to my attention on how the whole chosen works. Father only told me to find how well do i study, I will be needing it. That's his words to me. I needed to be able to enhance my memory skills. He repeated that almost 4 times ever since that day he told me he knew that I knew. Father started quizzing me on basic courses. From simple science to complicated science. I was waiting for him to give me a detailed history of the chosen and our faction. But i was told that I will deal with that once I entered the house. He told me that if I wanted to be on top of the scoreboard, I needed to study well. I was already on how our heart works with the course outline my father had gave me when Mom aapproached me. She sat beside me and carefully brush her fingers against my Hair. "3 years. You will be away from me for 3 years..." She said and pulled me towards her for a hug. "Ernilla. Promise me, You will take care of yourself inside that house. Promise me." I nodded and hugged mom even tighter. I felt tears on top of my shoulder. "Mom, why are you crying?" I asked. She smiled and tucked my hair behind of my ear. "I will miss you. I always knew I will have to send you, but I will still miss you." Mom pulled me again for a hug. I did the same. "I love you okay?" She said then finally let go of my body, stand up and went inside their room. I had thought for myself. What will I do if It's my turn to send away my daughter? Would I feel the same?

I spent the last few days studying, secretly snooping around my father's works in order to know more of the chosen. But my father is so secretive that I didn't find anything that could help me how the chosen works, or if there is even a way for me to turn my back on being one of the contenders. I am fixing my clothes until Emilla went inside my room. I stopped folding clothes and immediately made space for Emilla. She sat down on the space I made for her on top of my bed and she hugged me. "I am going to miss you! Promise me you will eat well, you will not skip meals even if you had to study, and promise me you will not date any other boy because you know how Dion always felt for you--" That's when I started to notice the rose gold bracelet on my wrist. I got so caught up with this whole preparation thing, if this is even called preparing. I forgot to bid my goodbye to Dion. I immediately hug back Emilla. "Thank you!" I said. Clearly she was shocked when I broke free and ran outside. Completely forgotting my phone, I went back for it to grab it. "What's happening?" Emilla said as I was searching my drawers. "I haven't told Dion yet!" I said still scanning my drawers. Apparently, Emilla knew the weight of me not being able to tell Dion, so she helped me look for it. She found it on my bed, threw it to me. I lip synced thank you and ran outside, while dialing Dion's phone. After 3 rings, He answered. "Hey, nila? You never called." His voice sounded like he just woken up from his peaceful sleep. "I am this season's one of the contenders. Meet me at the plaza right now." I dropped the call and hurriedly ran as fast as I can. I arrived at the plaza 10 minutes after I ran away from home. Completely forgotten to wear any type of warmers, I shiver in the middle of the place. Dion's house is far from us and it would take a few more minutes before he arrive. I tried to cover myself with the little cloth I had worn. Breathe into my arms to warmed myself a bit. Until I saw Dion arrived using her mini car and went near me. He gave me heating pads and assisted me inside his car. I know I told him that I am this season's contender so I waited for him to speak. "Wow. 3 years. Wow." He told me and took another heating pad and placed it on me. "You were out in the cold with that clothes?" I smiled before laughing. "I almost forgot to bid you my goodbye." I said that made him change his expression. "I am going to miss you." He said and gave me a quick hug. "I just hope you'll be my 20th birthday gift. Because you will miss out on my 17th, 18th, and 19th." He joke and laugh. Next week is his birthday. By that time I am already at the contenders house. "I will text you, if phone is allowed." He touched my face and burrowed his forehead against mine. "I wish I could kiss you but you're 2 years younger than me." His statement made me laugh. "I'll add that to my 20th birthday gift list from you." He said and giggled. "When will you leave?" He broke free and held my hand. "Tomorrow." I said and stared as he starts the car. "Where are you taking me?" He smiled before accelerating. "I want you to see the northern side before you go there tomorrow."

My eyes are all at places seeing Dion drive. My father only took us to libraries, parks and shopping malls. I never once thought that faction 7 could have so much nature. Dion is laughing at me every time i point a tree. Dion told me that his father is a nature researcher. He also didn't know what it really defines, but he's glad he get to see nature. Unlike me and my sister. This excites me since i have stories to tell Emilla later. We arrived at a mountain like border. One side is filled with all kinds of nature. Trees, grass, and a river. The only water landmark i've been into is the fountain at the plaza. Never thought i'd get to see this. "I wanted to show you what our faction can offer. You could use this as an inspiration to win the chosen and provide for our faction." I looked at how deep the border was. "Trust me, you wouldn't want to go down.." He said and took out a mat from his car and assisted me into sitting. "Is that okay? You parking at the edge?" The border's width is only enough for one mini car. Now I understood why he only used his mini car. "That edge leads to the main road, and won't fall over to either side so that's the best parking space." He quietly gave me time to appreciate the nature of faction 7's property. Until he tapped me. "Now do you want to see where you will be staying for the next 3 years?" I looked back and saw that beyond the border is a city that is so high in technology, I never thought I'd see in this lifetime. "What is that?" I asked, looking at the buildings after buildings, all colored in silver. I see people walking around as if they were ant in their nest. I looked deeper and saw trees as well on every corner where people would sit when waiting over the bus stop. I went forward but Dion stopped me. "Hey, you're near the edge. You'll be dead if you fall over." He said and pulled me away from the edge. "What is this?" I asked. I always knew the northern side existed. I just didn't know how different it was from our side. "This is the centrus. The northern side. This is where all of the trainers once lived. This is where you'll be for the next 3 years." He again assisted me into a sitting position and pointed me to the center of the centrus. An infrastructure that looked like the hall of justice. Both with 2 pillars. I looked at those words written in the center. But it is too small to be decipher especially when you are looking at my place. "I didn't know the contenders house stands on our land." He looked at me. As if it was a shock that I didn't know any of this. "Oh yeah. It is forbidden for you to be able to know this. Since you came from a family of contenders." Did I heard it right? Family of Contenders? We? "Don't ask. I am not the right person to tell you all of these. I just wanted to lessen the questions inside of your head." I am not even mad why my father didn't tell me all of these. But I had questions why. And no, Dion, You added more questions. "Let's go?" He said. I saw his watch flashes the time. I need to go home now. I stood up. He folded the mat and we went inside his car.

I didn't talk inside his car. I only talked when I bid my goodbye. I went inside our house. Earlier I wanted to tell all sorts of stories to Emilla. Now i'm sure I can't tell her without her having questions as well. It's enough that father hid the truth from me. I didn't want her to know it from me. Her sister. Emilla hugged me the moment I came home. I hug her back. We both bid our goodbye. Tomorrow. This is our last night together. I am not even feeling anything. Not even a slight nervousness. I didn't know what I will head on to. I guess that's what makes me invincible to feeling anything. Emilla slept in my room again. Father talked to me after dinner. Also to bid his goodbye. It sounded like he had confidence in his voice that I will be able to handle this. I kinda hope that he didn't. That might able to scatter some feeling on me.