914. Chapter 914

After Dead from New York

Episode 7.22

By

UCSBdad

Disclaimer: it's amazeballs that I don't own Castle. Rating: K Time: See above.

Author's note: This is a sequel to chapters 818, 877 and 904. An AU featuring Rick and Kate as photojournalists covering the world's hotspots.

Fallujah, Iraq, April 2004

"Castle, if you keep getting in my way, I'll….do something you won't like."

Rick grinned at her. "You're my wife and the mother of my child. And I love you more than anyone or anything. I will not let you put yourself in danger, because nothing you could do to me could be worse than losing you." Rick then stood between her and a firefight some hundred yards ahead.

Gunny Alvarez leaned down from the turret of his vehicle. "If you two don't quit fighting, you won't have to worry about no Eye-Rackies shooting at you, dig?"

Rick nodded. "We're so very sorry that our fighting is interfering with your war."

The Gunny smiled down at them. "Now you got it. And you two can get back in the vehicle. We're retrograding."

"You're what?" Kate asked.

"Retrograding." Rick explained. "It means going backwards. Since Marines don't retreat, they refer to it as retrograding."

"Damn straight." The Gunny said. "Scout snipers got a hide about two hundred meters back. We're gonna pull security for 'em. Now get in the damned vehicle or you'll get left behind."

Mr. and Mrs. Castle had thought that photographing snipers would give them fantastic photos for their respective newspapers back in New York. Unfortunately, that wasn't so. For one, the targets were anywhere from a thousand yards to three thousand yards away and the snipers were too busy when they were shooting to tell the two photojournalists where the targets were. And, all too often the snipers were doing nothing but checking the same streets and buildings over and over and over again.

"Boring." Whispered Rick to Kate on their second day at the snipers' hide.

"Boring ain't so bad sir." Corporal Boudreau said, not taking his eye away from his scope. "Nobody been killed by boredom yet."

"There's always a first time." Rick muttered.

Gunny Alvarez stuck his head out of the doorway behind them. "We'll be leaving at 2200 hours tonight, kids. We're going all the way out of Fallujah. Gonna see us some USO show."

"What kind of show?" Someone said.

"One that don't have no women wearing burqas." Alvarez grinned at Kate." Not that you ain't a pleasure to watch, ma'am, but you're spoken for."

"Very spoken for." Rick and Kate said together.

The next morning, Rick and Kate had breakfast with a group of embedded reporters. Rick was going through the photos he'd taken. "These are awful. There's isn't one that's worth sending back to the Ledger." He tapped his camera. "Look at this. Two seconds before I took this, there was a squad of Marines in that street and a firefight. But in two seconds, they all took cover. I have a street scene in Iraq. Big deal. And the one of the Marine tank. I should have gotten a huge flash of light and smoke, but I was always just a few seconds off."

Kate had been showing her photos to a French reporter for the Paris Match, Corinne Veneau. "I don't know what your problem is, Rick. I got great shots. Don't you think so, Corinne?"

Corinne rolled her eyes saucily. "Oui. They are tres magnifique. Stop off in Paris on your way 'ome and I'll 'elp you find a dress for when you win the Pulitzer Prize."

"Wait! Her photos are that good, and mine stink? How did that happen?" He reached for her camera, but Kate pulled it away. "Corrine is just one person. What does the London Times think of this, Johnny?"

Johnny took the camera and looked through the photos. "A bit much for a conservative paper like the Times. We go more in for distinguished looking British generals on the front page, but I think you Yanks will love this."

Rick finally grabbed the camera and looked at the photos. "Kate….Kate….These are photos of….."

"Your ass." Kate finished for him. "You spent our whole time embedded with the Marines keeping yourself between me and what was happening so I wouldn't get hurt. So, I took pictures of what there was to see. Those tight pants really do show off your best ass-ets." She pronounced the last as two words.

Corinne nodded enthusiastically. "I'd be 'appy to buy copies of them. The one where 'e's bending over and you can see 'is underwear especially."

Johnny smiled. "Not my cup of tea, old boy, but I do know some blokes who's just love to buy those pics. In fact there's a mag that'll pay you good money for those."

Rick sat and sulked while Kate and the other reporters oohed and aahed over the pictures.

Luckily for Rick, Gunny Alvarez came by. "You people going to the USO show? They have some of the cast of Saturday Night Tonight here."

"Who came?" Asked Kate.

Alvarez shrugged. "All I know is they got some singer chick who wears really short dresses."

Rick took Kate's hand. "Wait up, Gunny. We'll come with you."

"You want to see some singer chick who wears really short dresses?" Kate asked in a sultry voice. "I can show you more."

"All I want is for you not to show my ass to any more reporters. I don't want to be known as "Ass" Castle."

"How about C-ass-tle?" Kate teased.

Alvarez had managed to get them good seats with the senior NCOs of the battalion.

One sketch consisted of a dark haired reporter who was festooned with cameras trying to get photos of several fighting "Iraqis" and failing miserably. Then a beautiful woman wearing very, tight brief shorts and a halter top with a mass of chestnut hair came out with only one small camera. The man tried to get between the "Iraqis" and the woman and failed. The woman ended up taking selfies of her and the "Iraqis". Then they handed over their weapons to her and they all went off, to cheers from the crowd.

"That was us." Castle said, mortified. Then he noticed that Kate was laughing too hard to reply. "Do you think this is funny?"

"It's hilarious. All the reporters here and a lot back in the US know that you're so overprotective of me that you can't do your job properly." She kissed him." Rick I love you. You're my husband and the father of my child. But, I'm a photojournalist. That's who I am. And I'm as careful as I can be, because I want to grow old with you. Okay?"

Castle grumped, but nodded. "Okay."

He felt better about the sketch the next day when he found out that a number of reporters were jealous of him being portrayed on a Saturday Night Tonight sketch. He decided that being known for being madly in love with his wife wasn't a bad thing.

"Rick?" Kate said hesitantly. "We may have a problem."

"What kind?"

"When I uploaded my photos on the satellite back to the Sun last night, I must have accidentally uploaded all of my photos on my camera."

"All?" Rick said, horrified.

"But, look on the bright side. Now we're both known for having great asses."