802. Chapter 802

After Punked

Episode 3.04

By

UCSBdad

Disclaimer: I don't own Castle, but I'd journey to the center of the Earth for it. Rating: K Time: See above.

"Does this thing make my butt look big?"

Rick Castle knew that was one question no sane man would ever answer. "Beckett, it's a bustle. It's supposed to…stick out behind you. It was the height of fashion in the nineteenth century."

"But it makes my butt look huge, doesn't it."

Castle knew he shouldn't, but he was upset that Beckett had once again found a new boyfriend and it wasn't him. He conveniently forgot that he was dating Gina when he decided to be nasty to her. "You're right. It makes your butt look like the Goodyear blimp. Except not so firm."

She frowned at him and slapped him on the chest.

"What? All of a sudden an honest answer isn't what you want? The thing sticks out behind you a good foot." Beckett craned her head around to look at the bustle. She looked a bit upset. Good. He thought, and then felt bad. Before he could apologize or tell her that she looked adorable, she spoke.

"Why do we have to wear these ridiculous costumes anyway?"

Castle sighed. "Because we're going under cover. We need to blend in."

"But we'll be in virtual reality. We could wear our normal clothes."

"But that's not what the Gilded Age Society does. Look, I had a lot of trouble getting us tickets for this thing. All the steampunk aficianados in New York want in on this. Are we going or not?"

"I just don't see why I have to wear this absurd dress."

For a second Castle remembered all the things he'd done for Beckett. And all of the grief he'd gotten from her in return. "Fine. I'll call up Montgomery and tell him we can't go." Castle reached for his phone, then remembered it was at home since no nineteenth century English gentleman could possibly have such a device. "You have your phone in case we need backup. You call him."

"Is something wrong, Castle?"

"No, what could possibly be wrong? I'm going to spend the evening doing something I find fascinating and I'll also be able to listen to you bitch at me all night long. Are you going to call Montgomery, or not?"

"Of course, I'm not going to call him. We have a murder to solve. And Hamilton was neck deep in this steam punk subculture."

"A possible murder." Castle corrected. "Bill Hamilton's body hasn't been found."

"Fine. Have it your way."

Although they got an odd look from the cabbie, they arrived at the world headquarters of Sinthesis Corp. and joined a dozen other people dressed in the style of the 1890s. They were led into a small auditorium where they were given a short briefing by Sinthesis's CEO, Todd Manwaring. "Ladies and gentlemen, when you put on the virtual reality goggles, you will find yourselves, via Sinthesis's magic, in a realistic nineteenth century environment. You will be able to move, stop, talk, and do everything you could do in real life. For this demonstration we are reenacting a part of Five Weeks in a Balloon by Jules Verne. And now, if you'll put on your goggles, you will find yourself in a balloon over Lake Chad in Africa."

At once, everyone did find themselves in the gondola of a very large balloon. Rick looked over the side of the gondola to see that Lake Chad was only some fifty feet below them. "Captain Mallory! You must heat the hydrogen to give us more lift. We're about to crash in the lake."

Mallory ran to the controls and pushed a button with the word "Rise" on it. At once the balloon shot up. "Jolly good, Mr. Castle."

Castle looked down. It was a good three hundred feet to the lake.

" 'Owever, we need water, my English friends." The speaker was a lithe and lithesome woman with coal black hair and flashing black eyes who called herself Arlette d'Alencon, and was a renowned French explorer. "And there is a great deal jus' below us."

Dick Spaulding, and old African hand and big game hunter nodded sagely. "The lady is right. And here in the desert, we'll need all the water we can carry. But be careful and keep your rifles with you at all times. There are crocodiles in the lake and the armies of the Mahdi, from the Soudan, come this way sometimes."

"But we shall land and take on water." Said the expedition's leader, Sir Reginald Gardner. Gardener put his arm around the trim waist of his wife in the game, a woman much younger than he. In real life, it was known that Gardener had a wife of his own age, but he was a wealthy and powerful man and no one had said a thing about it.

Mallory pushed the "Descend" button and the balloon floated down to land softly on a beach some fifty yards from the lake. Paddy O'Malley, Gardener's servant, a strapping Irish fellow, jumped out and pounded a long spike into the ground, then tied the balloon to the spike to tether it.

"Mr. Castle, Miss Beckett." Called Spaulding. "I saw some huts to the north, a hundred yards or so. Perhaps there are local fisherman about and we can buy some fresh fish. T'would be a change."

Castle and Beckett, picked up their rifles and headed for the huts. As they walked, Beckett examined her rifle. "A Winchester model 1894, 30-30. Loaded, but no round in the chamber." She looked at Castle. "Remember to work the action before you fire. If we get "killed" in this simulation, we're out of this and we just have to sit around while the others play."

They found the huts, but they looked like they had been long abandoned and there was no one there. They turned back to the balloon and were suddenly confronted by a truly gigantic crocodile, heading right for them as fast as its short legs could move it. Beckett worked the lever of her Winchester, pumping five rounds into the beast with no apparent result. As the croc came closer to them, she aimed at his brain, slowly squeezed the trigger firing right into his brain and….nothing happened.

Castle worked the lever of his Winchester and fired one round into the croc's massive head. It fell dead at their feet. "What the hell?" Beckett said, looking at the croc. "I put every round into his head. I should have killed him. And you dropped him with one shot? How?"

"It's the nineteenth century, Miss Beckett. Now twenty first century Detective Kate Beckett would have dropped him with one shot, but Miss Katherine Beckett, intrepid lady reporter for the New York Ledger is a nineteenth century woman and can't shoot for beans. On the other hand, rugged outdoorsman Richard Castle is a crack shot. You should have read the pamphlet they gave us."

"That's absurd. Annie Oakley was a nineteenth century woman and she was a terrific shot."

"But Annie Oakley isn't here. Mr. Castle and Miss Beckett are." Seeing Beckett glare at him, he tried rolling his eyes. It had no effect on her. "Look, I didn't invent the game and I certainly didn't invent nineteenth century ideas about a woman's place."

"No, but you're certainly enjoying it, aren't you?"

Before this turned into a full blown argument, they heard people screaming for everyone to return to the balloon. As they ran, they saw a mass of horsemen racing towards the balloon, with back flags flying above them and wicked looking sabers in their hands. "The Baggara Horse! Those are the Mahdi's troops. They'll kill us." Castle yelled.

"The Baggara horse? Where did you learn that? Derrick Storm?" Beckett yelled.

"No, I read the pamphlet that told us all about this. You should have read it, too."

They were halfway to the balloon and ahead of the charging horsemen when Beckett fell. "I hate this skirt. My foot caught in the damned thing and I…."

Before she could finish Castle picked her up and threw her over his shoulder and ran to the balloon. He was moving slower now that he was carrying Beckett. A horseman with a better mount that the rest was rapidly gaining on them, raising his saber over his head and headed straight for them, screaming "Allahu Akbar".

Beckett was trying to get a bead on him with her rifle but every time she did, Castle stumbled and she lost the rider in her sights. "Castle, will you…" There was a shot from the balloon and the rider fell. Castle threw Beckett bodily into the gondola and jumped in just as the rope holding them to the ground was slashed by O'Malley and the balloon rose. The balloonists exchanged fire with the Baggara horse, but they were soon out of range and soaring over Lake Chad.

"Thank you." Beckett said. "You saved my life. Sort of."

Castle smiled at her. "You know I'd do anything for you, Beckett."

They floated along over the desert, passing over a small Foreign Legion fort, being besieged by Tuaregs. Miss d'Alencon wanted to land and assist them, but Sir Reginald quashed that idea, muttering about not giving a damn about a bunch of frog eaters. Miss d'Alencon got as far from the rest of the English as she could.

In minutes, they saw a caravan wending its way through the desert. This time Sir Reginald insisted they land to see if they could buy some fresh food. Spaulding, who spoke the language and O'Malley walked over to the caravan and spoke with the leader. Coming back in a few minutes with a bag of dates in exchange for Spaulding's pocket watch.

"Not very exciting for us." Muttered Lady Gardener.

"The idea for the game, when it's complete, is that there'll be adventures for the whole crew and some for just one or two people." Castle explained. "According to the pamphlet, you might trade with one friendly caravan and the next caravan you meet will be slavers who want to take you."

Suddenly the virtual reality goggles darkened and they found themselves once again in an auditorium in New York. The lights came on. Manwaring was standing at a podium, smiling. "That concludes our brief program, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you all for coming."

When they got back to the Precinct they had a surprise. "We found Hamilton. He was busted by the Pennsylvania police for drunk and disorderly at a Renaissance Pleasure Faire outside of Harrisburg."

"He's alive?" Beckett said, shaking her head. She turned to Castle as Ryan walked away. "No murder after all."

"Yeah. Sorry to have dragged you to that for nothing."

She smiled at him. "You know, it was kind of fun. I looked at the brochure Manwaring was handing out. They'll have a bigger and better one in a few months. I think I'd like to go."

"Maybe Josh can take you." Castle said as he headed to the elevator.

Beckett watched as Castle left. She had been sure he'd offer to take her. It was obviously something he'd liked. She shrugged and went to her desk to write her report.