189. Chapter 189

After 3XK, Yet Again

By

UCSBdad

Disclaimer: Beat me up and tie me to a chair, but I won't claim to own Castle. Rating: K Time: See above, and below.

2010

They sat there holding hands by the pool. Kate enjoyed the touch of her partner's hand on hers. He's more than my partner. He's my friend, more so than Ryan or Esposito who've been with me for years. We could have been more. Perhaps. We probably would have had a great run of, oh, six months or a year, then we'd be over. I mean, he's Richard Freaking Castle, millionaire author and playboy, I'm just some cop. We're from two entirely different worlds. And never the twain shall meet.

Kate's brow furrowed slightly, in thought. And why is this millionaire playboy sitting next to me, feeling terrible because he failed to catch a serial killer? I've learned a lot about Castle since we met. He can still bother me, but the attraction is there. Kate reached over and put her other hand on top of his. Castle said nothing, so she relaxed until her head was resting on his shoulder. I'm with Josh, the sort of a solid, dependable man that I know I want. He's with Gina, the sort of sophisticated, society woman who should share his life. So why do I so want to sit here with him like this?

2015

"Of course I was in love with you.' He said, nibbling at her ear as she sat on his lap. "How could any man not be in love with Kate Beckett?"

She laughed. "You did a very good job of appearing not to be in love with me."

"I'm a man of many talents. I was with Gina, and I'm the first to admit that she was a mistake. Both times, but we were together. And you were with Josh…"

"And I'll be the first to admit that he was a mistake."

"And I'll certainly be the second to admit it. Big mistake, Kate."

"I could have sat there all night holding your hand. I wish I had. I wish I had done so many things differently."

He kissed her cheek. "I could have done things differently. I wish I had."

"Especially the next day."

"Huh! What happened the next day?"

"Oh, you never heard about that?"

2010

She made sure that she got into the precinct as early as possible before Castle showed up. She checked the bullpen. Only Espo was in. She walked briskly to his desk. She gestured to the break room. "We need to talk."

Once in the break room she moved close to Epsosito. "Ryan is coming in today, right?"

"Sure. He said he'd be in bright and early. Why?"

"Castle is going to apologize to Ryan for what happened last night."

Esposito frowned. "What the hell did Castle do that he needs to apologize to Ryan?"

"He's…Castle." Kate looked around to make sure no one could hear. "I talked to him last night. He thinks he should have figured out Tyson was 3XK quicker and caught him."

"That's crazy. We're detectives and he isn't. How does he feel he should have figured it out before we did?"

"Because he did figure it out before we did. He recognized the MO of 3XK when he saw Linda Russo in the alley. We didn't. He figured out how to break Marcus Gates' alibi. We didn't. He figured out Jerry Tyson was really 3XK. We didn't. There's no damned reason for him to feel guilty, but he's Castle, so he does."

Javier shook his head and thought for a minute. "I'm not sure I know anyone but Castle who'd feel guilty about something like that. Most guys would be proud of making Tyson before everyone else. But not Castle."

"No, not Castle."

"He's quite a guy, Beckett. Quite a guy. We're lucky to have him."

"He is quite a guy. I know who my heart wants. I know who my head tells me to want. I know how screwed up my life has been since my mom died. I can't let my heart be broken again. I can't.

2015

"I will never, ever break your heart. I love that heart." He said into her ear.

"I know. But I didn't know then. My heart is safe with you."

Castle thought for a minute. "You talked to Ryan before I did that morning, didn't you? Told him I was coming and what I was going to say."

"Espo and I talked to him. We didn't want Kevin to be surprised."

"That explains a lot."

2010

"Ryan, can I talk to you?" Castle asked softly. He had waited until Beckett and Esposito had gone to see Lanie.

"Sure, what do you need?"

"Um, I need to apologize to you about last night?"

"Apologize? What for? I distinctly remember that it was Tyson who knocked me out and took my stuff. Are you confessing it was you?" Ryan smirked slightly.

Castle was taken a bit aback. He hadn't expected Ran to be so laid back about this. "Um, no. Of course not. But, when I figured out that Tyson was the real 3XK and not Marcus Gates, I shot my mouth off. I should have kept quiet and gotten Tyson into a position where you could take him down. Instead I let him know right off that I knew he was 3XK and he jumped you. If I'd thought instead of just running my mouth, we'd have got him."

Ryan smiled. "Don't worry about it. The important thing is we now know that Jerry Tyson is the real 3XK. We have his name, picture, fingerprints, and DNA. He can't get away now."

"So, you're not mad at me?"

"No! Don't be silly. Why would I be mad at you? It's not like we'd have solved the case without you."

2015

"I thought he took it awfully well. I mean, letting a notorious serial killer get away with your badge and gun has got to wear on you."

"Oh, it wore on him, Castle. It wore on him."

2010

"How did it go, Ryan?"

"Just fine, Beckett. Espo was right. Castle is about the only person I know who would have apologized for that. Most people would be bragging. And making me feel bad. As it is, I screwed up, he apologizes to me, and I feel even worse than if he had bragged about how smart he is."

"Anything I can do?" Kate asked.

"When you're stressed, you go down to the range and burn through a few magazines, right?"

"That helps a lot. You need to go?"

"Yeah, but I don't have a weapon. And I feel like a need a real big gun and a whole lot of ammo."

"I can talk to the armorer."

"Ah, forget it, Beckett. I think I'll buy everyone a beer. You in?"

She nodded. "Sure."

2015

"You still go down to the firing range and shoot to relieve stress?" He asked.

She shook her head. "I've found a much better way to relieve stress." She got up and headed for the bedroom. She looked back over her shoulder. "You coming, Castle?"