162. Chapter 162

AU After Fool Me Once…

By

UCSBdad

Disclaimer: I can't fool you. You know I don't own Castle. Rating: M Time: See above, but in that well known alternate universe.

"Castle not coming in today?" Ryan asked.

"To do boring police work? You're kidding me." Beckett said with a smile.

"What's so damned important about finding out who Steven Fletcher is, anyway?" Espo asked. "The guy's dead."

"Yeah, but somewhere, someone may be looking for him for all the cons he's committed. They'll want to know they can close their case and move on. His victims will get some closure as well. Maybe." Kate replied.

"So how many police forces and data bases do we have to contact?"

"All of them." She said.

"Castle should have an app for that." Ryan said, nodding his head.

"He should have an app for solving murders without driving me crazy." Kate grumped.

Ryan and Esposito looked at each other and shared a smile. Kate caught the smile out of the corner of her eye. She smiled as well, but kept it from her team.

Hours later they had gone as far as they were going to get. "We've contacted everyone on the planet, I'm sure. There may be a Tibetan sheep herder we missed, but we've hit every police agency and national data base that'll talk to us. They'll get back to us. Maybe." Espo turned to Ryan. "How about a little Madden and a six pack, bro?"

"Sounds good." He turned to Beckett. "You have any plans?"

She shook her head. "No. Just the usual. Home, read a good book and go to bed. I'll be going in just a minute. See you tomorrow."

Once Ryan and Esposito were too far away for her to hear, Ryan whispered to Javi. "And I know whose book she'll be reading."

"Yeah. That's an easy one, bro. She was his biggest fan before they ever met. They had a rough start, but…"

"Yeah."

Kate finished up and left the precinct. Once she got in her car, she sat there without starting the car. The book, his book, sat on the passenger's seat next to her. She stared at the book. The book stared back at her accusingly. "No. I'm going home. I'll take a quick shower, change clothes, have a bite to eat, and then…then we'll see." She said to the book. The book made no reply, but it almost seemed to Kate that the book looked a bit smug.

Once she had showered, changed and eaten, she stared at the book, now sitting on her couch. "Oh, all right!" She picked the book up and walked out of her apartment.

She was lucky. There was a parking space by his loft. She didn't have the excuse of no parking space. She nodded to the doorman and went to the elevator. She rode up to his floor, clutching the book. She knocked on the door. It opened.

"Beckett! What brings you here? Come in, come in. Can I take your jacket? Get you a drink? Wine? Red or white?"

She handed him her jacket and asked for a glass of red wine. It might make what she had to say easier.

She sat down on his couch. He sat across from her.

Kate took a deep breath. "Castle, this isn't an easy thing for me to tell you." She glanced at him, his smile had gone away. Now he looked worried. Go ahead. Look worried, Castle. "I've read Heat Wave. It's…" She looked at him again. He was anxious, headed to worried and then on to upset. "It's magnificent. It's the best thing you've ever written." She looked and saw he was grinning from ear to ear. She smiled as well. "And I have to tell you, I love Nikki. She's your best character ever, although I'm probably biased. And, I'll even confess that I even think Nikki Heat really is a cop's name. I'm enormously proud that you based her on me, although Nikki's a lot better than Kate. Thank you."

"You're more than welcome. But, you're wrong."

Kate frowned. "Wrong? How?"

"Kate is better than Nikki. I'm not a good enough writer to make Nikki as complex, as driven, as intelligent, as passionate and as remarkable as you are. I don't think I'll ever be that good a writer. Although I'll deny saying that if you tell anyone."

"Thank you, Castle. Can we just agree to disagree?"

"We do a lot of that, I think." Castle looked at her for a long minute. "One thing, I left a lot of the pain you have out of Nikki. It's still there, just not as much."

Suddenly Kate didn't like the tone of the conversation. It was too close to somewhere she never wanted to go. She stood up. "Castle, I really should go now." She headed for the door, but he cut her off.

He gently put his hands on her shoulders. "Kate, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought that up. I apologize, I should know better. Forgive me? Please?"

She lowered her head so that he couldn't see the tears that had started in her eyes. "It's my fault, Castle. I came over here to talk about the book and you talked about the book. I shouldn't have reacted that way."

"Please forgive me, Beckett. Every once in a while the mask slips and I see just how much pain you're in. I should know better. Am I forgiven?"

"Of course." She stood there, conscious of the warmth of his hands on her shoulder. Conscious of his presence. Conscious of Richard Castle.

"Kate, when I see that pain, I just want to put my arms around you and tell you that I'll take all the pain away. That I'll replace it with nothing but joy. But I can't do that, I know."

Kate took a step forward and rested her head on his chest. "You can't, Castle. But sometimes you push the pain away and you do give me lots of joy. More than I've had in years. Thank you."

"I wish I could do more." Castle was gently stroking her back, which she found unaccountably comforting. She put her arms around him and he pulled her into an embrace. She looked up into his eyes. He was smiling at her. She reached up and put her lips against his and began kissing him. After a second, he pulled away.

"Kate. No."

She took a step back, blushing furiously. "Castle, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have. I don't know what I was thinking. You're Richard Castle and I'm…" She started to walk past him. "I'll get my coat and leave." She didn't want him to see that she was crying.

She was surprised when he put his arms around her waist and stopped her. "You are the remarkable Kate Beckett. And the first month or so we are together, I would have kept on kissing you until we were in bed. But not now."

She wriggled around in his arms until she was facing him. "Why not now?"

"Because you mean too much to me. You're my partner, my friend and my muse. If we slept together now, you might think you were just another conquest, and you're not. We're about more than just sex now, Kate. Way more. And I want to do this right. If and when we go to bed, I want you to know it means something. It means a lot." He leaned down and kissed her gently.

"I really didn't expect that from you, Castle."

"I surprised myself, too." He said, jokingly.

"Okay, Castle. Tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow, Detective Beckett.

When she got back to her car, Kate realized she'd forgotten something. He went back up and knocked on his door.

"Beckett?" He said as he opened the door.

She came in. "I forgot something."

He looked around. He could see nothing of hers. That's when she threw her arms around his neck and very thoroughly kissed him, pushing her tongue into his mouth and tasting the sweetness of him.

"Beckett, I said that…"

"I will not be one of your conquests. Castle. You're going to be one of mine. Now come on." She dragged him towards the bedroom. Once there, she pushed him onto the bed and dropped on top of him. She kissed him, ran the fingers of one hand through his hair and tried to take off her blouse with one hand.

"Kate, are you sure about this?"

"Castle, I'm lying on top of you, kissing you, and trying to get my blouse and your shirt off all by myself with no help from you. Do I look like a woman who isn't sure?"

Castle gently pushed her off of him. "It'll be easier this way."

He unbuttoned her blouse while she worked on his shirt. She pulled his tee shirt over his head and he unclasped her bra. His hands went to her breasts at once. Rousing her nipples to hardness, then kissing first one and then the other, flicking the nipples with his tongue. He took one boob as far into his mouth as he could get it while stroking the other one.

"Our pants, Castle. The damned pants." She moaned.

"Lift your butt up, honey. He whispered. She did and he unbuckled her belt and slid her pants off and then her panties.

She kicked her shoes off while unbuckling his pants. "Your turn." She pulled his pants and his boxers down in one move. She grasped his erection. "You're already hard?"

He slid one finder into her. "And you're wet."

"Wet and ready." She got astride and lowered herself onto him until he penetrated her all the way. She moaned and leaned over so he could get to her boobs. He kissed them as she moved up and down on him.

Neither of them had any real idea of how much they had actually wanted each other. Both orgasmed quickly, then Kate collapsed on him. He pulled her to him and stroked her hair.

This can't possibly last. She thought. I know that. But I want him so badly. He turns me on in so many ways. As a partner, a friend, a lover and as…No, it'll never be more than that. I can't let myself think that it will. I can't.

"Kate, I told you that we were more than just sex. I meant that. I don't know where this is going, but I desperately want to find out. I think we could be amazing, remarkable, and forever."

Forever? Oh my god! He didn't say that. He didn't!

She smiled. He did!