CHAPTER 108

We hung up, I laid the phone back on the small table next to my chaise lounger. It was close to seven o'clock in the evening, there was a nice breeze out, I laid back down in my chair. There were only two other people by the pool, it never really got crowded until after dark. I laid there, replaying what Jenny had told me over and over in my head. The more I thought about it, the more angry I became that Kevin had actually struck her. I knew I was going to have to be careful if I encountered him in the future, not to betray Jenny, but more importantly maintain my cool around him. Just as I was thinking about heading back upstairs, I heard a familiar voice.

"Hey neighbor, what have you been up to ?"

I looked up quickly to see Alexis standing there, a large beach bag in her hand.

"Oh hey Alexis, not much. Just trying to get my last few days of rest in before hell starts next week.", I replied.

"Mind if I join you ?", she asked.

"No, not all.", I answered, pointing to the lounge beside mine.

She laid her bag on the table between us, then sat down in the chair tilting it back three quarters of the way. I could tell she had a bathing suit under the long black tee shirt that fell to the middle of her thighs. As I lifted my chair back up slightly, I could see several more tenants had made their way to the pool area.

"How's work been ?", I asked.

"Hectic, I have two players I'm trying to sign, one of them is Scott Johnson from Ohio.", she answered.

Scott was the new running back we had drafted in the first round, from all I had heard, I was extremely excited to see him up close. The other was a player for Oakland, drafted in the second round.

"Are you close to Johnson ?", I asked.

"Brian, you know I can't talk about it, especially with you.", she laughed, "But I think he will be in camp on time."

We talked about her work for a few more minutes, then she sat up swinging her legs to the side of the chaise.

"You wanna take a dip ?", she asked.

"Not right now, thanks.", I replied.

"Oh come on.", she urged.

She stood up and reached down grabbing the hem of the tee shirt with both hands. With one quick motion, she pulled it up and over her head. She was wearing a very revealing two piece spandex suit that clung tightly to her body. She was absolutely breathtaking, every man around the pool was staring helplessly. She reached down with one hand, inviting me again to get in the pool with her. I stood up, took off my tee shirt, tossing it on the table between our chairs. I followed her to the stairs, slowly stepping down into the pool. I have to admit, the water felt really good. We both drifted to the five to six foot section of the pool, where the blue and white nylon rope separated the pool in half.

"You're driving the women in this complex wild Brian. They don't get to see a body like yours often.", she laughed.

"Right, like you don't have all the guys in here drooling over you.", I shot back.

She laughed then dove under the water swimming toward the deep end of the pool. When she reached the area just by the diving board, she popped up, one hand gripping the board. She motioned me over to join her, which I did quickly. Now we were completely isolated from the rest of the swimmers, a full pool length between us. She now reached up with one hand placing it on my shoulder as I held on to the board as well.

"So you gave any thought to what I said ?", she asked.

"About the women in the pool ?", I asked.

"Noooo.", she replied, "About how I find you incredibly attractive ?".

"Oh, um…no not really.", I replied., "Why ?"

"I was just wondering that's all.", she answered.

There was an awkward moment of silence that passed between us, both of us looking away in different directions.

"I guess sometimes you're attracted to people, but they just don't feel the same way.", she said, softly.

"Oh no Alexis, that's not it at all. I think you're drop dead gorgeous. In fact you're the most beautiful woman I have ever stood next to.", I responded.

"Oh please Brian, don't get carried away now.", she laughed.

"Alexis, I am being honest. Any man would give his right arm to be with you.", I followed.

"Except you.", she giggled.

"It's not that easy Alexis. One day, I might tell you the whole story, then maybe you will understand.", I replied.

"Tell me now.", she urged, running her foot up my leg.

"I'm not sure how you would handle it Alexis, it's really ... .well I don't know how to describe it…..other than unusual.", I answered.

"I like unusual.", she giggled again, her foot still rubbing up and down my calf.

"Alexis, you're a good friend. You have helped me so much since I arrived here. I just don't want anything to ruin that.", I replied.

"Trust me Brian, your story can't be any more screwed up then mine.", she whispered softly.

"Wanna bet ?", I challenged.

"Yep, I'll bet.", she fired back.

I just shook my head at her smiling, she was not going to let this drop. I dove under the water and began to swim back to the ladder. By the time I reached it, she was right on my heels. I climbed out, then extended my hand, pulling her out of the pool. With her wet suit clinging to her, it left little to the imagination. She walked back over to our chairs, dressing then sitting back down.

"So what do you say we go back upstairs, get a pizza, then lay it all on the line. See where it goes from there ?", she urged.

"Alexis, I don't know…..It's not something I am proud of.", I said softly looking down.

"Brian, I would really love to get to know you better, if it takes laying everything on the line, then so be it. Come on.", she said, extending her hand.

I took her hand and rose slowly, both of us walking towards our building, not a word being said. As we approached her unit, I told her I was going to take a shower, then we could meet back up. She told me to just come over when I was ready. I went inside, grabbed a change of clothes, then started the shower. The entire time I was in the shower, I was trying to think of just how I should try to explain what had happened in my life. The more I thought about it, the more I began to think it was just a bad idea. I mean how do you justify being in love with your step mother ? Much less admit you had sex with her ?

By the time I finished getting dressed, I had decided to keep my relationship with Ashley under wraps.

I locked my door, walked two doors down to Alexis' unit, saw the door ajar slightly as it had been the last time I had visited. Once again, I stuck my head in, and acknowledged I was at the door.

"Come on in Brian.", was the response from inside.

I walked in, heading straight to the main room, sitting down on the large leather sectional sofa. The fabric felt soft and ice cold as always.

Alexis was apparently still dressing, I heard what I thought was a blow dryer. I guess I had been sitting there maybe five minutes when Alexis came walking into the room. She was wearing tight shorts and a tank top, white socks on her feet, rolled down to her ankles.

"How about a pizza, you hungry ?", she asked.

"Sure, but I'm paying this time, it's my turn.", I replied.

"Sure thing.", she said, dialing the phone.

She ordered the pizza, hung up and went to the kitchen returning with a bottle of red wine and one glass.

"You want wine, or something else ?", she asked, pouring herself a glass.

"I will just drink water," I replied.

She went back into the kitchen and returned with an ice cold bottle of water. She twisted the top off, handing me the bottle with a smile. She sat down next to me, close but not too close to be uncomfortable. Once again, I could smell her bath products, powder fresh, just a hint of a fragrance. She pulled her legs up under her, then turned to me with a wine glass in hand.

"Ok, so where do we start ?", she asked, her eyes bright and wide.

"I have no idea.", I responded, looking away from her eyes.

"Start from the beginning Brian, take your time.", she urged.

"Well you remember I told you what happened with my mother and father when I was young right ?", I asked.

"Yea kinda.", she replied.

So I decided to start from square one, that would give me enough time to work my way up to whether I would tell her about Ashley or not. I quickly recalled my childhood, if it could be called that. I told her about my early years in high school, when I first met Courtney and how rocky our relationship had been during those years. I told her about my brief relationship with Jasmine, but somehow it always came back to Courtney. I was at that point of my story where if I was going to tell her, it had to be now. I stopped abruptly, still not sure what to do. Thankfully she bailed me out, at least for the moment.

"So Courtney was the love of your life, to this point ?", she asked, her hand touching mine.

"It's much more complicated than that.", I explained.

"I don't understand.", Alexis replied.

Once again, I tried my best to figure out how to interject Ashley into this conversation. I still had no idea, so I just started stumbling into it.

" Well it all started when I was in college, after my Dad had died. I started having these weird feelings....", I broke off.

"What ?"she asked sincerely.

"Ashley.", I blurted out.

I looked for some kind of reaction in Alexis' face, but to be honest, I saw none to my surprise. I began slowly, telling her how the more time I spent around Ashley, the more I became attracted to her.

"Well really Brian, that's perfectly normal. After all, she did pick up all the pieces after your father died. I can see how you would have deep emotional feelings for her.", she answered.

"Yes but somewhere, the feelings changed to much more.", I replied.

I saw her squirm slightly on the sofa, her eyebrows raised just a bit. Before I could say anything else the doorbell rang. I got up, made my way to the door and opened it. I paid the delivery man for the pizza, taking my time to return to the sofa. Alexis had already returned with two plates and napkins. We each took a slice from the box , then leaned back on the sofa.

"So continue.", Alexis urged with a smile.

I slowly recalled the night on the Fourth of July a few years ago when I first kissed Ashley, then moments later watched her bolt from the room. I recounted how I immediately left for school the following day in an attempt to put it all behind me. Then later, that night on the sofa when we both masturbated in front of each other, trying my best not to sound like a pervert. I kept hoping Alexis was going to ask me to stop, tell me this was something I should keep private, but she never did. Soon, I was recounting the night of passionate love we shared, the night that would never be repeated, or at least had not as of yet.

I then explained how Courtney and I got back together, but how even though I loved Court dearly, that night still haunts me. I paused for a second, let out a deep breath like a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders.

"So I guess what it all comes down to Alexis, is I had been in love twice in my life. I lost Ashley to my career, then Courtney to cancer.", I finished.

I looked up at Alexis, I could see she was emotional, I was just hoping not for the wrong reasons. It seemed like an eternity passed by before she replied.

"Now I understand Brian, I can see why you are hesitant to get close to anyone.", she responded, softly stroking the top of my hand.

"Can I ask you just one question ?", she whispered softly.

"Why not?", I answered.

"I know that you will always love Ashley, it's to be expected. But are you still in love with her ?", she asked, her eyes riveted to mine.

"I honestly don't know Alexis. I mean since I have been out here, I know it's much easier. We talk every once in a while, but the temptation is not there everyday.", I replied.

"That does make sense.", Alexis told me.

"So now you can see why I am so messed up.", I laughed.

"Brian, you're not messed up, as much as I think you are confused. I think the reason you just fell head over heels in love with Ashley was she made you feel safe. When your Dad died what was left of your world crumbled, you had no one left. As you got older, you fell in love with both Ashley's, the one who got you through the turmoil and the beautiful young woman. But I think the first had a lot to do with the latter.", she finished.

"Maybe, but what about her ? Why did she feel some of the same things ?", I asked.

"Probably for a lot of the same reasons. When your Dad died she lost her world too. But being an adult, she had nowhere to turn to. Later when you started having feelings for her, she was probably lonely, I'm sure seeing a lot of your father's personality in you. I can't speak for her personally, I can only look at it from a woman's point of view. But I do understand why she would feel that way.", she responded.

"Thanks Alexis, I appreciate your understanding. I have never told anyone about this, you are the first.", I said, softly.

"Well, I'm glad you did Brian. It means you trust me to some extent, that means a lot.", she answered.

"I do trust you Alexis, I wouldn't have told you if I didn't.", I replied.

"Soooooo, I guess it's my turn.", she said nervously.

"No, that's ok. You don't have to feel like you need to tell me anything, just because of what I said.", I told her, our hands still touching.

"No, really I do. Like I told you, I am attracted to you, more than you know. After what you told me, I need to come clean with you as well, if we go any further.", she said, pulling her hand from mine.

She leaned over and picked up the half full bottle of wine and poured herself another glass, I guess trying to collect her thoughts. She started slowly, much as I had done, once again, almost from scratch.