Shattered expectations. BD

Thirteen years ago

Lucas

I walked her downstairs, down to my living room where her mother would soon show up. 

"Bye," I said and turned to go back to my bedroom without waiting for her response.  But I didn't go back to my bedroom or the outdoor reading area, I went to the surveillance room and watched her until they left. 

When she was around, I acted as if I could do without her and I could. Right? But I felt a pang of loss every time she had to leave. It didn't make sense because she was only a true friend. 

After Brittany and her mother disappeared through the gates, I went back to my room. Sulking at being alone in the mansion. In my wing of the house. But as fate would have it, my father drove in a few minutes later. 

 I hurried down to my living room as he drove to pack his car in the garage. The routine was simple. He would go to his side of the room, do his shit, call me to work on some financial report. There would be no discussion about school or my friends. But there would be demeaning looks and words if I asked about his work and travels. 

As I knew, he called me about an hour later. So, I went to his home office, hoping that for once, he would ask how I felt. You would think that he cared about me as his only offspring but the only things he cared about were pleasing Grandpa and being in control. 

As usual, the office door was open. I knocked and leaned against the door "You called me"

He didn't even have the decency to even address me with words, he only waved me in with a show of hand. Like a dog, I walked in too.

"Where is your laptop, Lucas? I need you to work on this report with me. The total doesn't add up, work with me, Lucas." 

The demands were always the same. Work on this report, Audit that, all the fucking time. 

"Send it to the house system, I will copy the file from there" 

He raised his head in anger " What did you say? You are telling me to send sensitive documents to the house system. I called you here to help, to contribute your quarter to the growth of this empire but here you are, sitting there and giving me orders" 

Yeah, he can be like that. It was like there was always this burst of anger in him. 

Every time we talk, I speak with practised deliberateness, knowing fully well that anything can tip him off. He could throw a book at me or his glass of wind across the wall. Or he could throw a punch at me. 

I could beat him now, months at the gym and boxing ring made that possible. I just never tried to hit him right back. 

"Sorry, Dad. I would go and get my laptop"

He puffed out in anger and continued mumbling insults as I stood up and walked out of his home office. Surviving the first stage, the next stage was to successfully detect the issue with the report or else, I would be a good-for-nothing son.

As it turned out, auditing that report was important to him because instead of leaving me to work in peace, he stood over me as I worked. Numbers were interesting and until I met Brittany, they were my favourite things. I calculated until my vision blurred and my hands shook. 

Someone was stealing the company funds and doing a good job of hiding it. I should have known that it was suspicious that my father wanted me to keep the audit from my grandfather. That was not his style. Usually, he liked to flaunt his wins even when I did all the work. 

I waited until he got a drink and I proceeded to the next stage. "How was your travel, Dad" 

"Fine. Is there anything you want to tell me, Lucas?"

"No…not exactly. Just checking"

"Well, if you forgot. I am a grown-ass man and you can leave when you are done"

Okay, there were no demeaning comments but you see, he was fucked. I used to mind when I was younger. I would ask him to come to my games and he would give excuses. 

His excuses revolved around work. Later, they upgraded to his travels and later, the truth. My sports and school activities were not important to him. I was a mistake and he had no patience to deal with me.  

And that day, I had no patience to deal with him. I looked forward to my call with Brittney but before that, I poured myself a drink. Yeah, Dad didn't mind that I drank, only that I didn't get drunk while he had company. 

I drank a cup of sauvignon wine. Yeah, 18 months old wine for an 18-year-old. We could afford it more. It was rumoured that my grandfather owned all of California and half of New York. The truth was that Grandpa dealt in real estate, he was one of the first set of people who started buying and selling properties in the state.

He didn't own half of California or the United States but he– the Fergusons–owned enough properties everywhere. We dealt in all kinds of legal business as far as I know, and made crazy contributions to charities.  One of which is where Grandpa got the artwork. 

My mind strayed to GrandPa as I waited for 10 pm when Brittany would call. Like the other Fergusons, he was a fine man. Although age had not been kind to him.

He was still sharp in mind and so he still monitored the affairs of the organisation and in extension, both of his sons. I missed the days when he was agile and played games with me. We would play poker and discuss business all day. 

After three heart attacks, he was not so sharp. My father had filled up his position at work and he was no longer available to travel down to California all the time. We still talk on the phone though, on the days he was not too tired to talk.

Years later, actually, it had just been a few hours, 10 pm came around. I picked up my phone and could hardly hide my excitement. Talking to Brittney made me feel like a kid on Christmas day and considering that I've spent the last two Christmas alone, the excitement was not equitable.

10.03 pm

10.11 pm

And she still hadn't called. I debated whether I should call her. And I did but it went straight to voicemail, so much for looking forward to talking to her. 

I drank another bottle of the vintage wine. 

And another. 

Nobody cared about me. I threw my glass at the wall and was going to the bathroom when my phone rang. It was a strange number and probably Brittany's brother. Like a depraved human, her voice calmed me. 

"Hey, it's Brit."

"What the fuck took you so long?"

"Lucas, don't curse. And you sound different." 

"Look, I can call back-

" No, no, we can talk now. Wait let me call you back now" 

And I called her back. I listened as she talked about her friends at school and her brothers. She said she preferred cooking to cleaning, I preferred neither. 

She commended me when I told her what I did with that financial report. "You would become a Wall Street guy. Or manage my accounts," she said and I laughed. I was going to take over running the company but she didn't need to know that. 

Her brother shouted her name and we laughed when she called him Brandy baby. Apparently, it was an inside joke. What do I know about family inside jokes?  "Don't let me keep you. Good night, Brit."

"Goodnight, Fine face. Hmmm… sleep tight, my friend"

"Are we friends?" I asked

"Yes, Lucas. We are friends now."

Friends. True friends. The only one I had. I vowed to hold on to the friendship and do my best to cherish her forever.  But I didn't know that Brittany was not different. Like everyone, she hurt me. 

And she left.