Chapter 20: Love

Aizen's POV

My father is the worst man alive. He's really outdone himself this time. Ever since he dropped the bomb about Desiree inheriting everything if we ever split, things have been... tense, to say the least. I'm walking on eggshells around her, not knowing how to act without making things even more awkward. 

I know that Desiree and I are 'husband and wife,' however, I don't know if she loves me. I could feel it, but what if I'm wrong? There's this lingering uncertainty in the air. I can feel it, but I can't quite put my finger on where we stand. She hasn't exactly poured her heart out to me. She never once told me if she loved me. She just told me that she was falling. It's like trying to solve a puzzle with half the pieces missing, and it's driving me up the wall. I don't want her to think I'm only with her for my inheritance. I love her, damn it! I just hope she knows that.

Another thing that's bothering me is the contract… If things go south and she decides to walk, she walks away with everything I worked so hard to achieve. This is frustrating. 

I want her to stay because I love her, but I also can't bear the thought of her leaving and taking everything I worked for. But how do I say that? It's like trying to thread a needle in the dark. 

I groaned, sinking into my whiskey.

Kenji's accusation pierced through the tense air like a knife. "You promised not to drag her into this mess," he uttered, his gaze a mix of disappointment and reproach. While Desiree and Kenji may not be what one would call 'friends' in our current lives, their past holds a different tale. As children, they shared a cordial relationship, one marked by mutual respect and kindness. Kenji's demeanor towards her had always been gentle, and it was evident that she held a genuine fondness for him in return. 

"I know I fucked up," I said, pouring us both another round. 

Kenji shook his head. "Five years, Aizen," Kenji reiterated, his voice firm and laden with disappointment. "You promised her five years of this hell. Now, you're sentencing her to a lifetime of chaos. She doesn't deserve that, and deep down, you know it." He knocked back his whiskey, his expression stoic but seething with frustration. 

I laughed hollowly, the sound echoing with the weight of my denial. "She loves me, doesn't she?" I grasped desperately at her affirmations, hoping they could drown out the growing sense of dread. "Her actions speak volumes. She's mine... she said so herself." But beneath my facade, paranoia and anxiety churned, threatening to consume me whole. "She said she'd stay for better or for worse."

Exhausted, I rested my face against my palm, my senses dulled by weariness. Through the haze, a blurred figure materialized on the other side of the room. Long black hair cascading down, a petite figure swathed in a lavender nightgown. "Desiree," I gasped, my senses abruptly sharpening as recognition dawned. 

Kenji's eyes darted towards her, a flicker of surprise crossing his features. 

Desiree strode over to us, her gaze unwavering. "Please stop tormenting my husband," she said, her eyes ablaze with fury. "Honestly, Kenji, there's nothing for you to worry about. Aizen and I have an understanding." She moved to my side, clasping my hand firmly. "Five years… I like to believe that Aizen and I would last longer than that."

I felt my cheeks flush at her words.

Kenji scratched his head. "Desiree," he said, his hands landing gently on her shoulders. "Please tell me you didn't fall for this bastard's tricks again." He shook her playfully as if trying to break through to her. 

Desiree laughed, waving her hand dismissively. "Kenji, I appreciate your concern for my well-being," she said, her tone light. "But I'm fine. We're fine."

Kenji blushed and nodded. "If you say so," he replied, rising from his seat. With a grin, he added, "I'm going then!" He glanced at me, winking. "Looks like your wife came to claim you." Chuckling, he nodded at Desiree before making his exit. 

Desiree then shifted her gaze at me, her face showing concern. She climbed onto my lap, her arms draped around my neck. "Are you drinking because of us?" she asked, her tone tinged with worry. "Do you doubt that I'll stay? Are you having second thoughts because of what your father did?" She leaned in, hugging me tightly. "I'll ask him to reinstate it in your name."

I hugged her tightly, comforting her. "Sorry for worrying you, Des," I said, kissing her head. "I trust you, alright…"

Desiree's plea was earnest, her voice carrying the weight of her emotions. "Then talk to me," she said, her eyes searching mine. "You said we'll navigate this together, but it's been days and we haven't really talked about it. The distance and the awkwardness is driving me insane, you know?"

I chuckled softly, nodding in agreement. "Me too, Des," I admitted, "It's driving me crazy."

Desiree pulled back slightly, her eyes locked with mine. "So why have you been so distant lately?" she asked, her voice tinged with concern. "Why does it feel like everything's changed?"

I exhaled heavily, feeling the weight of my words hang in the air. "Things have changed," I confessed, my voice strained with emotion. "And I hate it. I never wanted any of this, but it's like everything's shifted, and I don't know how to fix it." Frustration laced my tone, my thoughts muddled and conflicted. "But one thing I know for certain is that I want you here, with me. I want us to find our way back to each other, to the way things were before…"

Her furrowed eyebrows hinted at her concern, her gaze penetrating. "But?" she prompted, her voice soft but insistent. 

"I don't want you to feel imprisoned within our marriage like you did before we fell," I confessed, my voice trembling with emotion. "I can't bear the thought of you feeling trapped because of me. And the last thing I want is for you to think I'm only holding on because of the Empire." 

"Hey," she says, gently lifting my chin to meet her gaze. "It's only natural to worry about losing something you've worked so hard for... And about feeling confined. I won't deny that thought crossed my mind too. But I choose to have faith in us." Her lips brush against mine in a tender kiss, a soft giggle escaping her. "I'm grateful you shared your feelings. I just want us to find our way back to how we were. I know you love me." Pausing, she buries her face in my neck. "Now, it's my turn to share. I'm afraid you'll become paranoid that I might leave you."

I am scared. 

Desiree continued, her voice earnest, "I don't want to lay claim to what rightfully belongs to you.."

I shook my head, my touch gentle as I cupped her face. "That's just nonsense," I reassured her, my voice firm yet tender. "What's mine is yours, Desiree. Half of it belongs to you. You're my wife, and I love you more than anything. Screw what my father did! We're in this together, and we'll navigate through it, no matter what…" 

Her laughter was music to my ears, bringing a genuine smile to my face. 

"Hey," I whispered, my tone warm and affectionate as I held her gaze, "Let's forget about everything, alright? Let's just be together." Pausing, I let the sincerity fill my voice. "All I want right now is you. I never imagined feeling this way about anyone. It's like the love I have for you fills every corner of my being." With a tender touch, I drew her closer, wanting to convey the depth of my emotions. "It's like nothing else matters anymore… I never thought I'd be willing to give up the empire for you."

"I love you," she whispered, her words carrying the weight of a thousand promises as she leaned in to kiss me with a passion that ignited a fire within me. My heart soared with joy, the sheer happiness of hearing those words from her lips almost overwhelming. In that moment, all my doubts and fears melted away, replaced by a profound sense of certainty in our love. 

No more doubts. No more fears.

"You don't know how happy you just made me," I whispered softly as she drew back from our kiss. 

Her puzzled expression, marked by a furrowed brow, begged for clarification. "How so?" she inquired, her voice tinged with curiosity.

"You told me you love me," murmured, drawing her back into a tender kiss. 

Her giggles were like music, filling the room with warmth. "I heard your conversation with Kenji, Aizen," she confessed, her eyes sparkling with sincerity. "I wanted to erase whatever uncertainty you felt between us. I wanted to tell you how I truly felt."

With a playful glint in my eyes, I asked, unable to contain my joy, "Would you mind saying it again? It's like music to my ears." 

With gentle hands, she cupped my face, her touch grounding and affectionate. "Aizen Nara, my husband, I love you," she declared, her words wrapping around me like a warm embrace. As her lips met mine, a surge of warmth flooded through me, melting away any lingering doubts. In that kiss, I felt the depth of our connection—love, longing, and an unspoken promise of security.

With a soft touch, I held her close, my gaze earnest. "Promise me," I whispered, my voice filled with vulnerability, "Promise me you'd stay by my side forever… no matter what happens… Please?"

Desiree's voice was a gentle sigh. "Aizen," she breathed, "I'm yours."

"Do you promise?" I inquired softly, my gaze searching hers for reassurance. 

Her brow creased with worry. "Is something wrong?" she inquired, her voice tender.

I hesitated, then softly bit my lip. "You understand the risks of being with me, right?"

She smiled, nodding. "Do you want me to fight the people who hurt you that night?" she offered, playfully showing off her fist. "I'll kill them if they ever hurt you."

I chuckled. "My life is more dangerous than that," I admitted sadly. "I can't tell you everything there is in order to protect you…"

"I trust you, Aizen," she said, assuring me. "So, let's forget about everything else just as you said. I want us to be us. So, don't push me away, okay?"

I nodded. 

Desiree, if you found out I'm a yakuza, would you still stay?