Reincarnated in Twilight as Bella Swan (with a twist)

Teagan's story starts off like many others – with her untimely death. It was nothing special truly, unless you count a texting teenager not paying attention to the road as 'special'. She was only 25 but death felt…freeing. Life sucked, especially life in 2022. Life was tedious – work to live, live to work…and repeat. Murder was illegal and you couldn't even choke someone when they pissed you off… how was that fair?

She had her twin brother and a small handful of friends; but she preferred spending time in her house with her dogs, writing. Writing was the escape from reality that she craved.

It didn't take her long to realize that death wasn't natural – at least not her death, though when had her life ever been normal. She didn't disappear into nothingness. No dark abyss. No heavenly glowing afterlife or burning hell fire.

Just a poorly decorated room that resembled a principal's office. 'Smelled like one too' she thought scrunching up her nose a little.

The silence was a bit stifling, only interrupted by the constant 'click' 'clack' of the keys on the laptop being used by the faceless 'something' sitting behind a huge desk in a shimmering suit that constantly changed from black to white. It had no gender, as far as she could see – though maybe she just didn't have high enough clearance to see it. The slight smirk that was flashed before it disappeared back into a 'blur of facelessness' made her think she was correct.

"Let's see.." A voice startled her out of her thoughts though calling 'It' a voice would have been generous. 'It' was more like an echo of voices – no one sticking out. Again, no gender. Nothing to differentiate or tell her where she was. Nothing to tell her who…or more likely, what the hell was sitting in front of her. "Teagan Olivia Morningstar. Twenty-Five. Paralegal. Ruthlessly Pragmatic. Heavy on the Apathy. Heavy on the Misanthropy…." 'It' tsked while 'It' read and Teagan felt oddly exposed under 'Its' evaluation. Though so far, she could not find anything to deny. "Fondness toward Animals, Children, Money, and Food. Escapism via personal creation….."

"A shooter is in front of you, pointing his weapon at a dog and a man… you can save one – "

"Dog." Teagan deadpanned, running her thumb across her French Manicured nails while her emerald-green eyes scanned the office meticulously.

"25 hostages held at gun point or 8 puppies – "

"Puppies."

"You didn't let me finish the question."

Teagan scoffed, her left eyebrow lifting slightly. "As if I needed too, why would I save people when I could save puppies?"

'It' didn't respond but Teagan felt 'Its' eyes – if 'It' had any – on her. She could feel the piercing stare. 'It' was reading her soul; why 'It' felt the need she couldn't tell. She had meant what she said. "Those questions were more for curiosities sake than anything else; considering I already had a feeling what your responses would be. And therein lies why you are here."

"I thought it was because I died?" Teagan narrowed her eyes at 'It'.

"It is… but it isn't." 'It' responded vaguely, "You see, you're neither good nor evil. You neither deserve heaven nor hell. And in a surprising turn of events; it would seem we are receiving those like you in large quantities each day."

"Obviously. Humanity itself is neither good nor evil. Despite what those like to try to shove down others throat – it could never be so black and white. Also did no one ever think to check on your little heaven lovers down…or up… there? I mean honestly, they religiously, no pun intended, push their agenda on everyone else but pick and choose what they themselves practice. It's not a sin if they cheat on their wives and get divorced and then re-married 4 times; but put a LGBTQ couple sharing an innocent kiss in a children's cartoon and the world is assuredly ending. Let's conveniently forget that straight couples have been kissing in cartoons since the beginning of them; or the fact that they commonly show either Stockholm syndrome, underage relationships, underage and arranged marriage, murder, abuse, neglect, kidnapping, promoting physical attractiveness in the ever-present argument of love vs. instant attraction…."

"- Yes." 'It' interrupted her rant, nodding 'Its' faceless head. "It's come to our attention that in this new day and age, most of humanity can no longer be defined in such a 'black and white' way. As a result, those that have found themselves passing in the year '2022' – well we are going to try something else."

Teagan didn't answer. She simply tilted her head and lifted her eyebrows waiting for it to continue.

"Those that end up in an office like you tend to lean towards one or the other. I can't divulge how those cases will be handled – "

"One or the other?"

"As you said, it's a rarity to find a pure good or pure evil soul anymore; what we have found is that in some cases a soul may lean more toward darkness than light. While in others, they lean more toward light than darkness."

"And I am going to assume that I am neither?"

"That would be correct. Those like you, Teagan, are a perfect balance of Yin and Yang. You have yet to be swayed one way or the other. You have a certain disconnection that allows you to dislike humanity while not actively wishing or pursuing its downfall, while your apathy doesn't extend to life itself. It's rather fascinating really."

"Should I point out that my dislike for humanity while not actively pursuing its downfall has more to do with the chances of getting caught rather than the lack of desire?"

"Semantics. Of those souls like you, eighty-eight percent feel the exact same way."

"Gotta love statistics." Teagan chuckled blankly, "But that doesn't explain what happens to my soul now?"

"Well… the thing is, we have nowhere to put you. Despite popular belief there is no 'limbo'… I guess if you think about it, this could be considered limbo but we can't just keep souls here. This is merely a…"

"Sorting facility?" Teagan offered wryly.

She could practically feel the eye roll. "Essentially. And as such; certain exceptions must be made. For instance, we don't usually dabble in such things as 'reincarnation' though drastic times…" 'It' sighed, tiredly. "We've been given explicit permission to… in a sense, do as we wish."

"That doesn't sound feasible at all. I don't even know 'what' you are but to give you… however many of you there are, the free will to do what you wish with a bunch of misplaced souls sounds potentially problematic."

"I couldn't agree more…and yet here we are." As 'It' spoke, a random manilla folder dropped onto 'Its' desk. Teagan watched as 'It' opened the folder and while she couldn't see 'It'; the room was suddenly overcome with a sense of dread. "If I were a human, I'd most certainly call this a 'jinx'."

"What does it say?" Teagan wasn't expecting a reply and couldn't hide her surprise when she actually received one.

"Werewolves." 'It' replied so absently, Teagan wasn't sure if 'It' had actually meant to answer at all.

"Werewolves?"

"Ten feet tall, muscular frame, bulging neck, sharp fanged teeth dripping with poisonous venom, shaggy hair, sharp claws. Four full moons a month, every Saturday. Emphasis on the bloodlust for humans, animals, and vampires."

"Underworld?" Teagan guessed. "It sounds a lot like underworld."

"Twilight." 'Its' echo had taken on a strained note to reveal just how stressed 'It' was.

"Twilight? I've seen the movies. Read the books when I was about 12. Can't say I remember werewolves. If I'm not mistaken, they were supposed to be extinct – or at the very least well on their way. What about them exactly?"

"One of my…siblings, granted their soul charge 3 wishes. This soul used two wishes to benefit themselves and the last wish they wanted to spite an ex-girlfriend. To do that he wished for – "

"Ten feet tall monstrous werewolves with enhanced bloodlust to be sent into Twilight?" Teagan finished for 'It' and then snorted in amusement and a bit of sympathy. "And they say women are the ones you shouldn't scorn. Those poor vampires are not going to know what hit them."

It was quiet. Too quiet and that silence was unnerving. 'It' didn't speak. 'It' just well… she assumed 'It' was staring at the folder 'It' was reading. Teagan can admit that she felt a little saddened by the thought that a new and unknown species of werewolf was going to be introduced into the ecosystem and basically wipe out the vampire species; she didn't truly care about most of them…they didn't show enough of them for any 'fan' to build a relationship with anyone aside from the Cullens and Denali's and even those vampires were given limited screen time. At least not any 'Fan' that wasn't driven purely on horny hormones for hot vampires.

Teagan wasn't exactly a Twilight fan anymore either. It was strange really, how the older you get the more clear you see the many abusive and controlling tendencies Edward truly had. If he were anyone, aside from a 'hot 100-year-old vampire' – people would not find ways to excuse his behavior. Sneaking into a females room while she sleeps and breathing in her scent takes on a whole new meaning if Edward were human and if they truly took on traits from their human life…how many girls had to deal with his stalkerish tendencies in the early 1900s when no one would have advocated for them just because they were 'women'.

The only difference Teagan could find between Edward and Joe from 'You' was Smeyer writing midnight sun and having Edward be a self-aware peeping tom. Whereas Joe seemed to live in a fantasy of doing what was best for the girl he 'loved'…though maybe that made him more similar to Edward than she first thought.

No, Teagan may have enjoyed the world that Stephanie Meyer gave birth too when she created Twilight but she did not enjoy Edward nor Bella, and if she was being honest even Jacob crossed many lines in her book. Manipulation, Sexual Assault, Fiery Temper and Strength he could not control. Another male who insisted he wasn't good for the girl and yet could not stay away due to his own selfishness.

"I've reached a decision." Teagan looked up at 'It' in surprise. It had been so long since 'It' talked, she had almost forgotten she wasn't alone.

"Care to share with the class?"

"I'm prepared to offer you Five wishes – more than the usual. Sky is the limit." Even if she couldn't see 'Its' face; she could see 'Its' appearance and it was slightly haggard.

"And the catch is….?"

'It' seemed to come back to itself then. Sitting up straight. Shoulders back. Hands folded. Business-like.

In response, Teagan sat up straighter. Crossed her legs and clasped her hands on her knees. As she did, she got a glimpse of her own reflection in the globe on 'Its' desk. She had been on her way to work when she died. Black pencil skirt, black stiletto heels, white button up with the top three buttons undone. Golden Michael Kors watch on her right wrist. Her long golden-brown hair was down to her waist in gentle and natural waves. Mascara and eye liner caused her emerald eyes to appear piercing. French manicured nails and blood red lipstick, sunglasses to keep her hair out of her face and the sun out of her eyes.

Teagan smirked; she wasn't known as a ruthless paralegal for nothing. That familiar thrum of adrenaline began to course through her body; This is where Teagan thrived. Business, making deals, contracts, negotiations, and most of all, winning.

"We've been given permission to do as we wish but we have to keep a certain balance. That wish should have never been granted and it seems my sibling realized this only after that fact. Unfortunately, we cannot simply revoke wishes. In order to fix this mess; someone must go in and fix it."

Clarity dawned on Teagan like a bucket of cold water but she kept her face neutral. Only the slight narrowing of her eyes revealing that 'It' did in fact have her attention; even if she did not like where this was going.

"Unfortunately for you, your choice in where I place you is no longer yours. After reviewing the candidates – I've concluded that you really are the only soul we currently have in our possession that could handle this task." Teagan opened her mouth to protest, but it was already rushing to continue, "I've also realized that given your current apathetic state and pragmatic thought process; your base desire would have seen you be placed in …"

'It' grabbed her folder once more and made a show of running 'Its' gloved finger down the page though 'Its' laptop was still sitting right in front of 'It'; the folder was a power play. "…Resident Evil 8; if only because you have a somewhat unhealthy crush on Alcina Dimitrescu or as she is commonly referred to, 'The Hot Vampire Mommy'. I imagine your wishes would have made you the ideal mate for her."

Teagan could no longer hold her mask of neutrality. Instead, a glare so fierce if looks could kill 'It' would have burst into flames was directed toward 'It'. Her teeth were grit so hard you could practically hear them grind together. "You're telling me I had the chance to meet Alcina Dimitrescu. Most definitely fuck Alcina Dimitrescu and more importantly be mated to Alcina Dimitrescu! and instead I am being tasked as a glorified babysitter – "

"– not a babysitter!" 'It' interrupted indignantly, making a show of slamming her folder down on the desk in front of 'It'. If 'It' had been expecting her to flinch, 'It' was sadly mistaken. "You don't seem to realize the severity of the situation." She realized, they both knew it, she just didn't see how it was her problem. 'It' was rushing to try to change that fact. "Children of the moon in Twilight were different; maybe that's why they weren't referred to as werewolves. They didn't travel in packs, making it easy for a coven of vampires to overpower them. They were the same size as your average shape shifter…" At her raised eyebrow, 'It' elaborated. "Seven feet tall on four legs and around 10 feet in length. Unlike a shifter it was as strong and as fast as a vampire with the same food source which is why they were enemies to begin with though they were only a danger every full moon which was approximately once a month. They possessed the added benefit of being immune to vampire venom, both the pain and the change."

"And these werewolves differ how exactly?" Though 'It' could tell she wasn't swayed either way, she was showing interest and curiosity. 'It' could work with that.

"The werewolves being introduced into the story travel in packs of two; mostly mated pairs though sometimes threes – "

" – polyamory, how progressive."

'It' resisted the urge to roll its eyes; again. "Every Saturday means they turn four or five times a month. That increases the rate from 12 times a year to 48 where werewolves will be running around causing a mess. These werewolves are also immune to vampire venom though they have poisonous venom meaning that the vampires will not be immune to them as they previously were. A werewolf bite can and will kill a vampire. They're savage, bloodthirsty, out of control, and ten feet tall on hind legs."

"Based on the information you've provided I'm assuming the werewolf population has also dramatically increased. They'll decimate the vampire species before their enhanced bloodlust causes them to turn on the humans and animals of the planet."

"A possible and probable extinction level event. There will be nothing left if this is allowed to go unchecked."

Teagan ran her tongue across her bottom lip, "And you expect me to what? Play Hero? Save the world?" She scoffed. "Fine. I wish the previous wish was negated and balance was restored. You're welcome."

"That isn't how any of this works." 'It' replied incredulously. 'If it was that simple…what on earth would I need you for?"

And Teagan could admit…'It' had her there. "What exactly do you want from me and what exactly is in it for me?"

"I'm willing to sweeten the deal for you, Teagan. I have a mess on my hands. You wouldn't believe the amount of people who would waste a perfectly good wish to spite an ex – or just how many people are in the Sewer making Twilight the perfect target." Teagan felt her lips twitch…'It' was wrong she absolutely could imagine how many people would go out of their way to spite an ex and an even bigger idea of how many people were in the 'Sewer' exactly; she had been one of them, if only for the memes and constant entertainment. "I can't offer you Lady D. but I am willing to offer you someone else of equal or lesser value with a similar if not different diet."

"Don't try to mince words and play me." Teagan responded much harsher than she had intended though she didn't go out of her way to correct her tone. "I am the queen of play on words where you offer them just enough information to satiate their curiosity when in the end you didn't truly offer them anything to begin with. Equal or lesser value – similar if not different diet. You're offering me a vegetarian vampire in exchange for a blood drinking virgin killer."

'It' was panicked though 'It' outwardly showed no signs of it. It wasn't only her tone that had lashed out; the darkness in Teagan's soul was threatening to swallow the light and that would do 'It' absolutely no good. "Tanya Denali! The only unmated golden eyed vampire."

Teagan paused and much to 'Its' Relief, her soul once more settled. "… Go on."

"I'm willing to offer you Tanya Denali as your mate. I'll throw in saving Irina's life by ensuring that Laurent does not die and Garrett will find Kate much earlier than intended."

The only sound in the office was the slow, rhythmic tapping of manicured nails against the desk. "You have my attention, though that hardly seems like an even trade. I'm putting my own life on the line to save them after all, what good will they even turn out to be when my own mate would die, quite easily if one bite can be fatal, in the fight against werewolves?"

It was a very clear 'you need me, I don't need you' situation and Teagan had 'It'; metaphorically of course, by the balls.

"I am prepared to offer you something that we hardly ever offer. It's actually a bit taboo in our line of work but, as I've said before, desperate times. You are not good; you are not evil. You are no angel; you are no demon. All the benefits of both with none of the downfalls."

"And you have my attention."

As 'It' spoke another manilla folder fell on the desk. 'It' opened it and closed it again before placing it along with the werewolf file. "Nephalem are taboo. Millenia of enmity has made it so. Angels and Demons alike tend to look down on them though I would – more accurately – call it an inferiority complex. Nephalem are strong; much too strong, really. They are stronger than both species and possess the power of both. In most universes that causes them to be hunted and killed though that is no easy feat. In this case; no one will pay attention to your existence if only because you are in a universe where Angels and Demons tend to ignore the happenings on earth. As long as you don't actively try to interfere in heaven or hell; Earth is at your disposal."

"What will being Nephalem entail, exactly?" Though she asked, 'It' could tell 'It' had her locked in. It was too good an offer to pass up.

"As I said you'll possess the powers of both species. Immortality, Invulnerability; one black and one white wing. Retractable double row of fangs and consumption of blood due to your demonic half. Along with that, and I figured this would be to your liking, with your demonic appetite comes the need for a lot of meat. It's completely up to you whether that meat is human, werewolf or animal."

"I'm rather curious to see how Tanya would feel if that meat were human." Teagan's grin was wide and amused.

"I'm rather curious to see if you will change for her or if she will change for you. Will she try to change you. Will you even kill humans – "

"Obviously any consumption of blood will come from humans. I haven't decided on the meat, while I was prepared to be the perfect mate for Alcina; its more the girls who need to consume flesh while Alcina needs blood. I don't oppose their diet, to each their own but we'll see. I feel a special type of hostility toward people who 'reincarnate' into Twilight, wish to or simply choose to become a vampire only to become a vegetarian… why even bother being a vampire if you are going to limit yourself in such a way?"

And for a second 'It' feared that maybe 'It' had made a mistake. The way her green eyes seemed to glow sadistically, her smirk just a little too wide. Had 'It' given something sinister permission to awaken in 'Its' soul charge? But her soul remained settled. The darkness did not awaken and attempt to swallow her light.

"I'll ensure that you have complete knowledge of your abilities upon successful transmigration. With that out of the way another small … minor really… problem has been brought to my attention."

"I noticed the folder you didn't bother to hide. If I could make a suggestion; read demand – get in your fancy computer and put a large red and emergent memo telling your siblings to get their heads out of their assess and stop approving wishes they shouldn't. On top of that, stop approving Twilight wishes, I can guarantee this is my last addition though I have yet to agree to whatever it is."

'It' made a nervous almost distressed hum before 'It' took the time to type rather urgently. "Now with that out of the way. Yet again, a wish wasted to spite someone; Truthfully this has been happening a lot today, though most of them had been denied. Each of us have our own worlds and departments we are responsible for; Twilight just happens to land in my domain."

"And someone once again made a wish to alter or screw with Twilight in some way and one of your siblings approved it." Teagan stated more than asked.

'It' nodded reopening the file. "In this new reality; In laymen's terms…Bella managed to convince Edward to sleep with her before he left. He left her pregnant."

"Unexpected. A little funny. A bit savage. But what does that have to do with ...….."

Silence.

Silence.

More Silence.

A lot more Silence.

'It' purposefully avoided Teagan's look. Moving 'Its' body in such a way that she knew 'It' was avoiding her eye.

Silence.

Silence.

More Silence.

"You said successful transmigration, not reincarnation. You expect me to become Isabella fucking Swan?" Her voice was low but calm. Deceptively so. Somehow that made it feel more dangerous.

"Did I forget to mention?" 'It' allowed an innocently nervous smile to show through 'Its' facelessness though it disappeared at her unimpressed look. "You don't have to sleep with Edward, he will be long gone before you show up."

"Transmigrated into Twilight against my will," Teagan began ignoring the now incessant click clacking of the computer. "Placed in the body of the bland and tasteless Isabella Swan. Pregnant with Edward Cullen's love child. While trying to stop a sudden overpopulation of werewolves from destroying the world. Am I missing anything?"

"Tanya Denali as a mate, saving Irina and Laurent's life, reuniting Kate and Garret earlier than intended and You'll be a powerful Nephalem with Earth at your finger-tips." When it was clear she did not seem to think any of that was enough for what it was now asking, it continued. "And I'll sweeten this deal a bit as well."

She didn't respond; though she made a 'proceed' gesture with her hand.

"In order to be the perfect mate for Alcina you would have to have been prepared to have three daughters; triplets, to be exact." In her file it had stated how her next big goal would have been motherhood and how she had always wanted twins or triplets; 'It' was offering her something 'It' was sure she wouldn't refuse.

Teagan sighed while pinching the bridge of her nose. "Take the name Renesmee, write it on a piece of paper and burn it out of existence. They will have my DNA; not Bella's, mine. Bella will be an incubation system – useful but in the end disposable."

"Understood." 'It' hastily agreed, rushing to type the agreement on 'Its' computer. Teagan had a sinking feeling that once things were typed into the mystical computer, they were made permanent in one way or another; hence the inability to take the wish back after granting it. 'It' made a humming noise low in 'Its' throat to confirm her thoughts and she fought the urge to groan in exasperation. It suddenly made more sense why 'It' was hurrying to input information before she could change her mind or take it back… she was essentially locked in. "Names are free for you to choose."

"Brielle, Callie and Daniela. Eldest, Middle and Youngest in that order. Can speak all the languages I can; Romanian, Latin, French, Spanish, Slovakian and obviously English."

"Brielle Esme. Callie Rose. Daniela Alice. Last name Morningstar. I'll add a note to include a last name change on legal documents and Charlie will be appeased because at least you are alive."

Teagan felt her eye twitch. "Why the Cullen names for middle names?" She chose to ignore the 'alive' part knowing 'It' would explain in a moment.

"Imagine the look on their face when they realize that precious little 'Bella' named her daughters after the three women who abandoned her after their worthless brother/son knocked her up and now she has no memories of them at all. Especially when two out of three of them have a burning desire to carry children."

"Appealing to my sadistic darkness…how naughty of you. Are you supposed to entice me to the dark side? Do you have cookies?"

'It' didn't dignify any of that with a response nor did it look a win in the face. "For all intents and purposes, they will be Nephalem. Unfortunately, there is no such thing as 'vampire/angel/demon' Tribrid being however, like you they'll have fangs and need blood and meat. Once more your choice whether that meat is human, animal or otherwise. They'll have that similar slight glow in the sunlight but nothing noticeable to humans. They'll retain the original child's thought projection power and because they hardly inherit anything from their father – golden eyes are non-negotiable. They'll possess higher intelligence than a normal child but grow normally until they reach 21 and then stop aging as all Nephalem do."

"Golden eyes despite the fact that I will not limit my children's diet to animal blood?"

"Yes, eye color is permanent. In the story I believe she inherited Bella's eye color but seeing as these children will be inheriting all of their base looks, powers and physiology from you; I thought it was only fair they inherited something from him."

"..I suppose I can see your point, though he will have nothing to do with my children. As far as I care they moved away, they can stay away. I never understood why people would go into Twilight as a Cullen 'FanGirl' or 'FanBoy'. Don't get me wrong I don't hate them, I just think their thought process is flawed – except Emmett. He's a himbo who only does what he does for Rosalie. I also appreciate Rosalie's no bullshit attitude, although her mourning her life is a bit simple minded – seeing as she has 'rose colored glasses' for her little human life fantasy but that is hardly my business."

"You could make it your business, if you wanted." 'It' commented offhandedly while typing away and Teagan stored the offer away. Maybe she'd make it her business and help heal the broken blonde vampire…or maybe Teagan will let her wallow in self-pity because she has other shit to do. 'Decisions, Decisions'. "Bella is much worse for wear when Edward leaves her. He's a teenager, a teenage vampire sure, but a teenager none the less. He allowed Bella to coerce him into pre-marital sex. It was harder to deny her when she started begging and stripping in front of him – "

" – my dignity took a hit just listening to this." Teagan murmured disgustedly.

"I didn't make the wish..." 'It' sighed before 'It' continued as if she didn't interrupt. "She was vulnerable, crying, begging – he couldn't resist indulging her just one time. Right as he 'finished' – he nearly bit her which caused him to flee the scene and not look back, though it was more than enough for his little swimmers to get the job done. She was left naked, afraid, and alone on the forest floor with a harsh rain that starts just minutes later. She can't find her jacket – "

"– good riddance, horrifyingly ugly brown jacket."

"– so she dresses clumsily and stumbles around in the dark. Similar to the original; Sam finds her though this time she is not mumbling incoherently, she is shaking with a high fever and delirious for an entirely different reason. She spends 12 months in a medically induced coma from where she nearly died of hypothermia, dehydration, and starvation; though truthfully, it's her body getting ready for the soul extraction and replacement process."

"Edwards such a little cunt." Teagan huffed purposefully ignoring the part about soul extraction and replacement.

"Indeed." 'It' Agreed. "Though the pregnancy will last a full nine months and will be highly normal compared to Bella's original pregnancy; the children still need plenty of blood and meat. She was starving and dehydrated because they were starving and dehydrated. They are cut out of her body but she's 'stable' enough to be brought out of the coma when the children are three months old; the doctors simply assume it's a natural reaction to being triplets that the girls haven't yet been deemed healthy enough to leave the incubators."

"My babies have been nearly starving for three months? What is that bitch doing now that she is awake? Does she seriously not think about the fact they could be half vampire and need blood?!" Teagan demanded. 'It' seemed to shrink a bit at her tone and 'It' knew that any sympathy, if any, she had for Bella disappeared completely.

"They are fine; hungry but fine. It will have no detrimental effects; they can survive off the baby formula and such that the hospital feeds them and as soon as you feed them what their body is actually craving, they will be healthy as a horse. They already have retractable fangs I've kept concealed from the humans; they'll eat the meat raw and a lot of it on their first consumption; from then on you can decide whether to cook it or not. I'd advise you to sign out against AMA – get them home and then take care of their needs."

"That doesn't explain why that selfish little bitch hasn't tried to feed my daughters. She could slit her own wrists and offer it to them for all I care, where is she during all of this?!"

"When she woke from the coma she repeatedly asked for Edward and became hysteric, delirious, and unhinged when they tried to explain that he was no longer there. While a small percentage was still the soul extraction and replacement process affecting her mental capacities, surprisingly, she was still sixty-five percent in control of herself and that by my calculations was a completely natural reaction for her. She wanted to hear nothing about a pregnancy, even when they introduced the babies, she rejected them; screaming about how they didn't 'feel' like hers and how she needed Edward. Soon after she slipped into a somewhat comatose state, though she was aware and would react violently when they tried to coerce her to either interact with people or the children or speak in general. She would eat and drink on command but that was just because they threatened to put her in a psychiatric facility."

"You're lucky you're forcing me into her life instead of making me be her sister or something; I'd put her out of her misery, anyway." Teagan sneered. "Keep her away from my babies until my soul is there with them. Seeing as my children take after me and not that useless excuse for a main character; I am keeping my looks and my name. I sure as hell won't pretend to be her in any way shape or form. You couldn't pay me to be that pathetic."

"I figured as much. I'll make a note that she is denied access to the babies for fear of mental instability making her a danger to them." A very intimidating and low growl sounded from Teagan's chest at the thought. Though 'It' was pleased to note the paternal attachment to the triplets had already begun to affect 'Its' soul charge and 'It' marked that as successful while she was distracted. Also, a quick note that 'Nephalem Assimilation' was moving at an alarmingly fast pace. Teagan was indeed distracted, murdering Bella Swan in her head in several different and painful ways. "A personality and name change is not considered uncommon in amnesia patients who suffer trauma hence why Charlie will be appeased that at least you are alive. Now…let's move on to your first wish?"

Teagan bit her lip, but it didn't take her long. "It was removed from New Moon but Edward wired Bella 20 thousand dollars for College; I don't remember where I read that it was 20 thousand a month and Bella being Bella threw it through the Cullens front window in a fit of teenage immaturity. Seeing as he is a dead-beat but very rich father of my children, it's only fair its 300,000 a month. 100K per child."

'It' deadpanned. "A bit excessive, no?"

"Please, that's being generous." Teagan rolled her eyes. "They have Alice to play the stock market and Carlisle has not only been alive for nearly 400 years, he's also been a doctor that entire time. That's not even counting the income of the other 6 when the Cullen 'Kids' aren't playing high school. Both Edward and Rosalie went to medical school, who knows what other degrees they possess as a collective. And if we ignore the fact that Bella went insane and became a danger to herself and my children. We can also point out that I am inheriting the life of a broke fresh out of high school eighteen-year-old with a father who lives off a sheriff salary in a town that has a population as large as my graduating class and a flighty mother who couldn't be bothered to show up for her only child's high school graduation nor the 12-month long coma she was in. Either way, I didn't ask for your commentary."

'It' huffed but chose not to comment further. "Your babies will be one years old when you are finally transmigrated. Obviously, Bella is out of high school seeing as she had high enough GPA, she was able to graduate early. Edward has been gone for over a year. 24 months to be exact. That will add up to 7.2 million dollars and 20 years old."

"I want it in an account that only I can access, anytime he makes a wire transfer into my account; however, the stalker got the information to do so, it will automatically transfer into my new account with him unable to track it – no questions asked. Whatever cover he gave for the money itself will suffice; I'm sure Jasper assured the money went through some bullshit to remain undetected and uninvestigated by the IRS."

"That can be arranged." 'It' confirmed still typing away preparations on 'Its' computer. "You'll already have Bella's mental shield to protect you from vampiric powers but I'll go ahead and provide an upgrade to a physical and mental shield – on me. To ensure that all of their powers will be blocked while offering that protection to your mate as well. As an added bonus, I'll ensure the protection extends to the triplets."

A snarky reply about 'desperation' was on the tip of Teagan's tongue but instead she chose to smile innocently and be kind. "Thank you but ensure that one of them if not all of them have the capabilities to turn that shield into more of a forcefield. Can never be too careful with werewolves running around."

'It' gave her a look that she interpreted as 'It' knowing exactly what she was thinking before 'It' continued to type though 'It' did nod to acknowledge her request. "Any ideas for a second wish?"

Teagan thought for a second before grabbing the Note Pad and a fancy black pen off the desk in front of her. Using her knee for support she began to write while she spoke. "I want an overabundance, unlimited if you could, supply of guns and weapons along with an unlimited supply of Silver Nitrate Bullets and Silver Nitrate Gas…."

"Silver Nitrate?" 'It' whispered more to itself than Teagan but on the off chance it was a question she chose to answer it. "Do you even know how to shoot?"

"Please. I'm a regular at the shooting range. Silver Nitrate cannot be dug or pushed out by rapid healing. Silver Nitrate, similar to mercury, is a silvery substance that is excreted directly into the bloodstream clogging it with poison and essentially, burning it from the inside out. Similar to Silver Nitrate Ammunition, Silver Nitrate Gas helps weaken the wolf when they breathe it in making them weaker, lethargic, debilitated and confused. It also has the added bonus of not affecting anyone in its vicinity except the wolves. This list should suffice; mostly weapons that I can remember from Underworld or Blade. The best kind of weapons to effectively decimate a supernatural species."

"Probably for the best. The longer they are alive the more people they can turn and the more damage they can cause."

"My thoughts exactly." Teagan agreed, returning the cap to the pen, tearing the page out of the notepad, and sliding the page in front of 'It'. She kept the notepad on her lap and tapped the pen against it slowly. "Those bullets are to burn every remaining shred of werewolf DNA from the host upon death and reversion to its human form. I could always dispose of the bodies; but on the off chance that one manages to escape, or I simply don't want to bother, I can't risk humans getting hold of werewolf DNA and asking questions about things they shouldn't. After death, all traces of the silver nitrate will disappear and all that will remain is a very normal bullet that will lead them nowhere in any possible 'investigation'."

She paused in her explanation, a thoughtful look taking over her face before she grabbed the paper again. Uncapping the pen, she began to scratch off several things and replace them with something else. "While I refuse to allow my new life to become some 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer,' Spin-off; The Volturi is a real and very present threat. Their gifts will be useless against me and my children, however, knowledge is power and as far as anyone in the Twilight world will know I will just be a very unique, new age and powerful vampire species. Absolutely no one, until my trust is earned that is, will know otherwise or the full extent of what me and mine are capable of. That being said, in addition to my Silver Nitrate Ammunition – and no, this is not a separate wish – I need Werewolf Venom Ammunition. If Sunlight was a weakness, I'd simply request Ultraviolet rounds but I'll make do with what I have at my disposal."

"Do these actually exist or are we creating them?"

"As far as I know they haven't been used in any series to date but you don't need to create them from scratch. Simply replace the silver nitrate in the Silver Nitrate Bullets with the Werewolf Venom – however, instead of Silver the bullets should be made out of a crystalline material hard enough and strong enough to easily penetrate their skin. The Werewolf Venom, much like the Nitrate, will be excreted into the 'blood stream' of a vampire. Unlike the Nitrate where Silver Nitrate will literally seep out of a werewolf's orifice's while they slowly and painfully die. The Venom should begin the process of turning the venom of a vampire back into blood; blood will seep from their orifice's and as they slowly begin the process of reverting back to human, the body will also begin to shrivel up; much like mummification. The years catching up with them. Slow, Painful, Debilitating and it sends the message I am intending."

With that she re-capped the pen and slowly slid the paper back across the desk.

"I'm not sure whether to be impressed or horrified." 'It' nodded before 'It' took the paper and slipped it in her file then began transferring the appropriate information to the computer.

"Thank you. For my 3rd wish…" Teagan trailed off absently while uncapping the pen once more and readying another page. "I want a chain of Restaurants with an open bar. Though only open one for now. Something similar to the Canlis in Seattle. Name: Pandemonium. Elegant, Fancy but not over the top. Open Bar. Excellent Service. Heavy on the Blacks and Whites though different types of Roses will be placed decoratively around the place. Some aquariums with multicolored fish in the walls. Kid friendly. Not targeted specificically at vampires, but includes them. Two floors; human below and vampire above – V.V.I.P section. In the - "

"Very Very Important Person?"

"Very Vampiric Important Person," Teagan smirked without looking up with a slight shrug. "As I was saying, In the V.V.I.P. no outward scents or sounds will reach them, meaning they won't be affected by the humans below."

"Sound proof and scent proof – smart." 'It' sounded impressed.

"A house special will include Crimson Rose – a wine with strawberry, rose and human blood infusion. Fruity, Sexy, Fine. Intense Flavor but Light. – excellent with meats. Bottle will be decorated in intricate golden roses. Because I'm not a total bitch and until further notice I have a vegetarian mate, I'll have Crimson Rose Lite – same infusion except animal blood instead of human blood. Maybe something exotic like Lion. Another special will be Azure Berry. I read an article once that said if you deprive your blood of enough oxygen, it can turn blue; I'm sure there is a way to ensure it stays that way with your magical wish granting energies. Azure Berry is a wine with blue blood, blueberries, and lavender infusion. Slightly floral, sweet but not too sweet; once again intense in flavor but pairs well with Fish and Sushi. Again, Azure Berry Lite will be the same but with Animal Blood. Octopus since its naturally colored anyway. Bottle will be decorated in intricate silver roses. For children, I want the same infusions but virgin making it a juice instead of a wine and a type of vampire friendly baby formula."

It paused in typing... "Is that all?"

"Two Entrances; one for humans and one for vampires, keep them as separate as possible. I'll go out on a limb and assume with my powers and status it won't be hard for me to allow vampires the consumption of food." She paused only long enough to see 'It' nod. "Then I'll need 'minions'. I have high standards and humans couldn't possibly fulfill them plus the danger of them potentially becoming dinner instead of serving it. I don't have time to play babysitter and money makes the world go round; my 'minions' won't need to eat or drink or sleep, they'll never tire or fatigue and the only feelings they will have is extreme loyalty and passion for whatever job I assign them. Whatever job I assign them will have instant mastery. No heartbeat or Scent. Cannot bleed or feel pain. Stronger than a human but not as strong as a vampire. Capable of being stored in a sort of 'stasis' when I no longer need them…unlimited numbers of those as well though I'd suggest keeping them in some sort of cryo-pods." Feeling its incredulous and slightly judgmental stare, she didn't bother looking up from her writing. "I have responsibilities, three children and werewolves to deal with. I plan to open more restaurants after I perfect the first and having minions to do whatever I want them to do; with perfection, will save my time and sanity."

"I'll handle it…. I'll provide you with a supercomputer, much like mine, that works like a holographic system. It will store all of your 'unlimited' minions, weapons, and ammunition. Simply turn on the computer, swipe until you find what you're looking for and press a pretty little red button for it to materialize. The minions can be stored in cryo-pods however they will feed off demonic and angelic energy which will be automatically pulled from you and given to them. It won't affect you at all; you won't feel or even acknowledge it but its how we will keep them subservient."

"Not too worried about it." Teagan waved her hand dismissively with a self-satisfied nod. "4th I want a monopoly of current Apple Tech, Smart TVs, and PlayStation 5s. Tech company named 'Allure' the logo a 'lotus flower' with the Slogan, 'Technology of the Future'. If Earth is my domain I sure as hell will not wait over 10 years for decent technology."

"I'll add in the Allure tech to your supercomputer; it'll work the same way."

"My last and final wish is very straight forward. 3 vials – one containing a pink liquid. One containing a yellow liquid. And one containing a white liquid."

"Unlimited?"

"You're learning. The white liquid will be a 24-hour vampire cure. No limitations; after 24 hours the cure wears off. During the 24 hours they can die just as any other human can. 50K per dose."

"Why not make it permanent?"

"Please," Teagan scoffed. "Supply versus demand. If it's permanent, why would they need to come back for more? This is business darling, do keep up. The yellow liquid will be permanent if only because I can charge much more for it. It will offer a vampire the ability to eat food, diminish the shine of their skin like that of a hybrid, allow them to sleep. 100K."

"And the pink?"

"Reproduction. Must be taken before sex; will allow the woman's physiology to change to that of a hybrid to allow the pregnancy. Nine-month birth and slow growing hybrid child because Smeyer wanted to make Jacob less creepy by making Renesmee grow at an advanced rate – but any vampire lucky enough to have children will want to enjoy the process. Will grow at a normal rate and then stop upon reaching the age of 21. No one wants to be a forever teenager stuck in high school. The vial will need to be retaken per pregnancy. 25K each. Cheaper because I'm not completely heartless and I can imagine there are those who will want more than one child; especially when they have eternity to do so."

"I'm making the finishing touches and as soon as I'm finished, you'll feel the beginning of the transmigration. Good luck, Teagan. I'll be in touch."

And Teagan didn't think 'It' meant that quite as literally.

But 'It' did.