stuart_auden

Well your 3rd chapter length was OK but I'd say if you can at least around a couple thousand words I believe to be honest I've never looked at the number of words in a story so I can't give you an exact number sorry but like I said the 3rd chapter length seem OK.

Tftc. Bet there still not going to believe the news of white walkers even when wilas starts telling everyone in the reach about what he saw.

F*CK YES finally someone who gives ned a spine and shows him as an actual northman not like some wannabe southerner.

Tftc. I'd like them even more if they where an actual chapter size no offence but your chapters are more like a paragraph then an actual chapter. P.s. I do like that your not having Jon just take sh*t and be a little b*tch whipping post.

Tftc.

Harem no no no my friend I said just 2... or 3 wife's lol but no seriously can you even call 2 wife's a harem really or you could go with 1 wife 1 or 2 paramour's I mean even Corlys had a side piece remember just make it so the mc's wife is OK with it so he doesn't have to hide it hell she can even be apart of it .

Tftc.

He is valyrian sooo multiple wife's.

Tftc. As long as the pov switches are few and far between then go for it I just hate when the author switches pov's all the time and we have to wait like 5 to 10 chapters before we see the mc's pov then only get 1 chapter before switching again i mean what's the point in having a mc at that point. lol

With seafoam being useless on land doesn't that mean the mc himself is going to be useless during the dance as most of the battles/fights where inland and unless seafoam can jump or spit a couple thousand feet in the air then she's useless in a dragon fight because all they have to do is stay high up or just go inland plus in the first chapter you said seafoam was quite fast on land and with her having a serpent like body I would have thought she'd be an absolute monster in a land battle. P.s. with seafoam being a sea dragon you can give her extremely dense/hard/tough skin/scales as she'd need them for the deep DEEP parts of the ocean. P.p.s. sorry for the rant lol.