taytjie
I like to write.
Writing
of reading
16
Read books
thanks I'll fix it in a jiffy
'Jessica cheered and immediately..' just an edit suggestion. also tense issue. 'cheers' is present while 'cheered' is past.
you switched genders again. it should be 'don't scold her anymore.'
'that is true' <-- you're switching tenses here. you write mostly in past tense but 'is' is present tense. Check through your writing for 'is' 'has' 'will' and 'can' also 'isn't' 'wans't' 'hasn't' and 'can't' too. If you find them switch them to past tense so you can keep with the rythm of your story.
you have an issue with your pronouns. You're calling her a wife, saying she's a woman but then using male pronouns to indicate to her in your writing. there are a few moments of 'his' and 'him' being used when talking about the 'wife'
building some nice tension
Interesting chapter. You're writing is nice.
It is an interesting read, the world is fascinating and the characters are fun to read about. There's a bit of a style issue with writing but an easy fix and doesn't take away from the story.