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Lirika_Marchen

Lirika_Marchen

Lv1

Hello. Like everyone here, I love to read different stories and write in my free time.

2022-06-30 JoinedGlobal
-d

Writing

2.8h

of reading

119

Read books

Badges

6

Moments

35
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Replied to Zurakor

    Thanks. :) I will try to write on time so that the chapters come out often.

    Ch 18 Every ending is the beginning of something else.
    altalt
    [Broken]
    Fantasy · Lirika_Marchen
    detail
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Commented

    The author recommends rereading the story and editing it. If you fix everything, you'll get a good story. Thanks for attention.

    This book has been deleted.
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Posted

    This is a story with cultivation, where the heroes usually look for ways to obtain divine (or demonic) power. Reading this story, for some reason I wanted to reread Shall Seal the Heavens. It's facilitated by the unusual pleasant atmosphere prevailing in this story. It is clear that the author tries hard and writes in one breath. Because of this, there are typos and mistake in the text that would be worth editing and correcting in a good way. And despite this, I liked this story! Thank you author! And of course, what kind of story will do without romance... ;) It remains to hope that the FL will find her love.

    This book has been deleted.
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Commented

    Wait a minute, so Rushuang or Rushang... Which of the options is correct?

    This book has been deleted.
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Commented

    I wanted to know why Rushuang is written with a small letter? Is that how it was intended?

    This book has been deleted.
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Commented

    Mom may be the heavenly Empress? Or is it still the emperor...

    This book has been deleted.
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Replied to EldritchBlade

    A paragraph less than 70 words? Thank you for advice. I'll try to make it.

    This paragraph has been deleted.
    altalt
    [Broken]
    Fantasy · Lirika_Marchen
    detail
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Commented

    By the way, is it on purpose to write Xia with a small letter? The rulers from the Xia Dynasty will be very sad. :(

    This paragraph has been deleted.
    altalt
    Her One Smile
    Urban · _Rockbison_
    detail
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Commented

    Who

    This paragraph has been deleted.
    altalt
    Her One Smile
    Urban · _Rockbison_
    detail
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Commented

    I agree with the previous comment.

    This paragraph has been deleted.
    altalt
    Her One Smile
    Urban · _Rockbison_
    detail
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Commented

    What.

    This paragraph has been deleted.
    altalt
    Her One Smile
    Urban · _Rockbison_
    detail
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Commented

    ,"

    " From today." Xia simply answered.
    altalt
    Her One Smile
    Urban · _Rockbison_
    detail
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Commented

    Looks like no. Maybe it's better to write x with a capital letter?

    This paragraph has been deleted.
    altalt
    Her One Smile
    Urban · _Rockbison_
    detail
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Commented

    Country X? Is this mistake?

    This paragraph has been deleted.
    altalt
    Her One Smile
    Urban · _Rockbison_
    detail
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Posted

    A rather unusual story about a boy and a girl in the entourage of a supernatural fantasy. There is everything here, a complex with its own rules, black rooms, researchers and endless tests. And there are also subjects here who day and night dream of escaping from this place and remembering who they are and where their place is in this world. It is a pity that the chapters in this work are so short that you just start reading them and delving into the essence of the problem, and they are already ending. Thank you for the work done by the author, I wish you good luck! With respect, L. Marchen.

    altalt
    The Reddest Red
    Fantasy · blossoms_hkhk
    detail
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Commented

    I join the previous comment. Maybe some cute name. C-3PO or R2-D2? ;)

    Ch 7 More confusion
    altalt
    The Reddest Red
    Fantasy · blossoms_hkhk
    detail
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Commented

    This is a story about Pinky and Brain. Oops. I wanted to say about Girl and Boy... :D

    Ch 3 Bunk beds
    altalt
    The Reddest Red
    Fantasy · blossoms_hkhk
    detail
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Commented

    This is a rather unusual narrative. I'm really curious to know what's going on here at all?

    Ch 1 A Dark Room
    altalt
    The Reddest Red
    Fantasy · blossoms_hkhk
    detail
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Commented
    This paragraph has been deleted.
    altalt
    The Reddest Red
    Fantasy · blossoms_hkhk
    detail
  • Lirika_Marchen
    Lirika_Marchen1yr
    Posted

    Author, I greet you. It's a fascinating story, but it sinks under various flaws. Of course, this is my subjective point and I don't want to offend you. I recommend rephrasing sentences with a large number of pronouns "I", and also adding quotation marks for direct speech. Perhaps at the beginning of the story you should add a brief reference, "Who is who", so that later there will be no confusion. Who is Andrey? He's the boss's assistant. Clear. And who is this. Kelvin. Okay. Thanks for the story. It is clear that you have made best effort to write it. I will definitely finish it. :) Respectfully, L. Machen.

    altalt
    The love package; My Darling wife and baby girl
    Urban · SCarew
    detail