I don't think this is a terrible idea, and the story development is okay. However, I can't get past the fact that the grammar in this story isn't very well developed. I know not every author can hire a proofreader for every chapter, but this webnovel from the start honestly feels a little rushed on the author's part. If you're the type of person that's okay with some bad grammar, this could be an okay story. I just can't focus on the story when my immersion is being constantly broken by present and past tense switching around, when in narration only past tense should be used unless referring to a character asking himself a question about his/her future. I really feel like the idea for this webnovel is great, but when the other reviews say it is childish, that's probably because it feels like something a teenager might have written at times.