it was a great scene

basically, the villains boasting/answering the child like this feels pretty unrealistic and stupid. contrast that to itachi and kisame in the actual manga where they just act, dont say much besides their demands and telling their opponents to git gud when they do speak. No one explains themselves like this to their opponents outside of saturday morning cartoons. its like a kid explaining to their teacher the trick to how they did so well so they can get praised.

the dialogue here is pretty bad. its not how people talk. It feels forced, like an info dump for readers who are unfamiliar with the setting. I dont know if this is a TL work or not, but if it isnt, the author needs to work on dialogue.

Lol, I regularly support Authors on patreon. Be snide if you like, but its fair to point out that the chapters are short and then the reader gets pointed to a patreon after being told it wouldnt happen.

I want to reiterate that this fic delves into the characters in a way many professional authors dont manage. It is not the messiah of writing, but it is of Naruto fanfics if you like or can get past the smut. Finding stories like this are why I delve through a lot of the garbage or mediocre stories in fanfics everywhere. A++++

One of the best fanfics I have read. It has excellent characterization, analysis, is unafraid to make story changes based on the authors influence on the world, and has tasteful smut. Its basically a UNICORN. So, this review is not only based on current chaps here, but up through ch 500 available elsewhere. My endorsement is this one is damn well worth the time.

I agree with this comment SO much. This is my favorite naruto fanfic, and one of my top 3 favorite fanfics overall.

So, I admit I binged this pretty hard because it was so excellent. ...aaaaannnnndd that includes the Patreon chaps. my question is, when does the author plan to write more? Is the author here the one on the Patreon, or is it a repost? It looks like thousands of chaps for other series have been written since the last one for this, based on 'most recent' filter on the Patreon (which isnt setup with a way to contact the author, hence me asking here). I'm kind of hooked on this fic with how much work the author has put into making it feel as real and excellent in characterizations and plot (due to a single story change) as a lot of professional works. the smut is managed in a way that appeals to the inner perv while maintaining this quality level, so it's basically a unicorn as far as I am concerned.

The Author said it would never be a patreon exclusive, and then made it a Patreon only exclusive within 30 SHORT chapters. I mean, need I say more?

yeah, these wishes made me lose all interest lol. onto the next fic

its like in DBZ with the Goku VS Frieza fight. Goku was already using Kaioken xWhatever and still losing. ichigo is massively more powerful now than he was originally at this point, but he still hasnt matured or refined his powers over the same period. its the difference between one talented, athletic genius with a superstar trainer and the same talented, athletic genius who has many more years of experience in the sport even if they didnt have the perfect roadmap.

so many obsessed with hanabi lol.

and I do know this is a repost, but Im calling it as I see it

Hm, I cant say I like the direction of the kidnap arc just to add wolf to the team. it felt forced. i also think the perspective being limited to bellamy is dragging the story a bit. no talk of the foh base, no talk of how they got abducted, no curiosity on how he got knocked out by the mc. no talk of student safety where students were working and visiting, in a place clearly within walking distance of the school. there was a lot wrong with this arc, and it felt contrived to mainly introduce a robot dog. next, the plot will focus on another new team member, because thats clearly what the author is focused on at the expense of other considerations.

i had hopes the story would be decent even if the prose was poor due to clearly a TL or non native speaker, but this shows a poor understanding of the HP universe.

um, weren't Illyanas ankles broken?

its clearly meant to be evan, but the mtl hasnt been proofread at all. usually at least names are proofread for consistency. ill have to see if it gets better or if i can put up with it. im halfway down the page and its a hassle so far.

this was great until the random anti dark force league thing started. i think a 2nd transmigrator opposed to the mc isnt good in most cases. in the cases where it is good, its a murder-mystery type of thing or 2 transmigrators both knowingly opposing each other from the start. this version just completely derails the good plot you had going so far.

Merlin talked to dragons.

i cant read this anymore. i appreciate the poster sharing the initial story, but the writing quality has not just dropped off, but isnt even really complete thoughts or actions at times. I cant read this anymore, its not what got me this far.