Slackr

It's a slow burn novel that (as of chapter 12) is still at the very early stages of the story (obviously [img=Smug]).It has the potential to be one of the better stories I've read on WN and I am looking forward to where the author takes it from here!

I also don't know if just switching the day would work. If I had to give advice on how to go about it differently I'd mash some of your chapters together to keep a singular moment contained in one chapter and then cut down on the descriptions of the moment a bit to make it so the chapter isn't terribly long. (Don't do this, IMO. Your wordplay is what makes you unique as an author.) One piece of advice I got a lot, which I never followed because I tend to get way too into my descriptions, was that each event in the novel shouldn't exceed more than a handful of chapters. As I said before, though, I'm just playing devils advocate here. I believe you're doing a fantastic job, so take everything I'm saying with a grain of salt. The more you cater to the criticism, the farther you get from what you enjoy about writing. (At least in my experience)

I am an overly descriptive author myself and used to get jabbed at in the comments for taking up too much time being descriptive. But you can't take it to heart! As you say it's completely subjective to each individual. Just write your way and the real fans will appreciate it!

I'm only saying these things because you asked, and they aren't major deal breakers for me, so don't take it too personally! I'm looking at it from a macro perspective and not my own personal point of view! ( I love the way you write, and I have absolutely no qualms with the story as it is now. I just think some web novel readers aren't as 'traditional' and like things quick and dirty if you will.) But that said, at least in the more recent chapters it's felt like you've spent far more of the chapters content on describing singular moments that make up only a short, somewhat insignificant moment in the story. The clash with Kaze and the cultivators, swindling the other group at the base, the storytelling chapters, and this encounter have now spanned... 25+ chapters? It can feel somewhat dragged out as the progress of the story gets stalled because of it. Basically, one event has now consumed a massive amount of time and space in the story. (Again, I love the descriptive nature of your story, so this is me just playing devils advocate). That's just my two cents! Thanks for the chapter! You're doing great IMO! Keep it up!

Nvm.. found it.. I didn't think I actually had to add the [ ] to the name to find it but when I did... there it was! lol

What name are you writing Greed Online under? Can't seem to find it..

To Monkeyphil

Question.. anyone got a time machine? I'd like to be able to binge read 500+ chapters of this book so I need to go into the future. Anyone?

Margrave by next week:

I think we might kill the author with all these castles.... Hahah