I was a woman with everything that everyone wishes to have. Money, career, fame, perfect family and a perfect love partner. I was a woman who was about to get married in a perfect church wearing a perfect gown.

Now I'm just a woman who woke up with nothing left and no one can recognize me.



Inside the building where Class B's participants were. They were having trouble answering the questions. They weren't told that questions that was out of their knowledge would come. Still, they answered them all. Though they were too late. They were hold for thirty seconds inside the last room. That applied to the Class D's participants too. Class F was really lucky to have their questions easy. 

Class F earned their second win. With the help of Haruka Kei, Mana Shiro and Seth Kaneko, they beat the Class B and D in the sixth test. After that, it was already noon. The Principal said that they would be having a one hour break. And will be back after an hour. 

Students who didn't bring a lunch with them were inside the cafeteria. Those who have were eating inside their rooms. Some were outside, eating in the benches. Seth was with his usual gang. They were at the rooftop. Well, it's because Tachibana had brought her own luxurious bento. It was enough for four of them to eat their fill. 

"This test," Ryou was talking to Seth. "What do you think is the reason behind it?" 

Seth was almost finish eating his lunch. "Aren't they promoting the school and changing how the school works. From here on." 

Ryou shook his head. "The latter is the only correct one. They really aren't broadcasting the test outside the school. It was a strategy to make their enemies stop what they were planning. Making it looks like they are going public." 

Erika was surprised when she heard what Ryou said. "Really?! Then, we're playing right into their hands?!" 

"What did the President said about this?" 

"They'll still continue what they were doing." 

Only Seth and Ryou were the only one who understand what they were talking about. The student council president was having their test tomorrow. They came to watch the test and to talk to Ryou. Since Seth haven't decided if he'll help them. 

The four of them were done eating. And it was already time for the participants to go back to their place. Without further ado, the test continued. 

*** 

Two test had been done. And Class F didn't win to both of it. Both were a physical test. Even though they used Okamo, they still lost the test. Class B and Class D have three wins now. Class F has two. And their ninth test were starting! 

"Class F had drawn from the box." The principal read the name of the test. "Hidden Puzzles! This test includes mental and physical efficiency. It would be a really good test! Let's have our participants chosen right now!" 

Osamu Katsuo and Azura Maki. They were the participants for the Class F. 

Class B's participants: Aira Matsuka and Niko Erin. 

Class D's participants: Ishika Uroge and Getsu Nin. 

Class F's participants: Osamu Katsuo and Azura Maki. 

"Jigsaw puzzles were hidden everywhere inside the school. X marks for hints. And answering questions correctly can grant you pieces of jigsaw puzzles. Now go look for them and build the mysterious puzzle presented to you lots!"

Seth Kaneko, became an orphan when his Mom and Dad had an accident that leads to their death.

He was left with a huge sum of debt. He knew that he can't pay all of his inherited debt, so he resorted to suicide by hanging himself, in order to escape debts. But unfortunately, he was saved by his apartment's landlord and rushed him to a hospital.

(Note that, this is a work of fiction. Any names and events written are all fictitious. Happy reading!)

Yang Ye tilted her head. After contemplating for a while, she said, "Your scores are very good. If you don't want to study abroad, you may enter one of the top universities in China. I'm different. My family wants me to study either in the United States or Australia."
"Wherever we are in the future, let's work hard together," said Ye Jian. She had no intention of discussing which university she would be going to. Pointing outside and smiling, she said, "That is so beautiful. What is that place?"
Now that the topic was back to the University of Sydney which Yang Ye followed with interest, she stopped asking Ye Jian questions. Her eyes brightened up as she looked at the direction which Ye Jian was pointing at. "It is the Central Tower, the landmark building of the University of Sydney."
Built in 1850, the University of Sydney was deemed as one of the most beautiful universities. It was essential to the politics and economy of Australia, and it had cultivated a myriad of politicians and millionaires.
The buses parked beneath the Central Tower, the most iconic architecture of the school. The tower was exquisite and majestic like a royal palace in Europe, and the gorgeous sculptures on the top of the tower were the embodiment of the long history of this renowned school.
The contest lasted from eight in the morning to one in the afternoon. Afterward, the students could tour around the campus freely. Right now, few students were lingering on the views. As soon as they got off the buses, they headed to the main teaching building.
In the main teaching building, there was a large hall which could host hundreds of people. Inside the hall, there were 288 desks. Each desk was 90 centimeters long and was far away from each other. Students must sit in the middle of their desks, which was a convenient way to prevent cheating and facilitate surveillance.
As everyone sat down, Ye Jian sensed that numerous people in all directions were monitoring all the students.
A famous politician who graduated from the University of Sydney and participated in the Science Olympiad twice, gave a brief speech to encourage the students. As the bell of the bell tower began to toll, the theory test started.
The hall was in complete silence after the exam papers had been handed out. Every student was immersed in the complicated puzzles of the Math Olympiad.
The test was comprised of five sessions in total, including algebra, geometry and math theory. Each session contained smaller parts. The more puzzles the students solved, the more challenging it would be in the following questions, and the more time it would take them to finish the questions.
All the teachers were outside the exam room. Through the massive display screen, they could see how their students were faring. The international police focused the camera lens one after another on the students, trying to find out which of them had been controlled by the international drug cartel.
In the office, Xia Jinyuan fixated his eyes on the three Vietnamese boys, whom Ye Jian had told him about. Three hours after the exam began, a Vietnamese boy stood up, placing his exam paper into a file pocket. With his head low, he walked past the other students.
"Here, zoom in." Xia Jinyuan pointed at the screen as the Vietnamese boy walked past one desk. His hand moved subtly, which was hard to notice. 
He took several screenshots and zoomed in for multiple times. A black and small ball of paper slipped from the boy's hand. As he switched to the next picture, he saw the ball of paper on a student's desk and the student covered it with a piece of scrap paper.
At the sight of this, two international police officers gave Xia Jinyuan a meaningful look. They took out their intercom to inform their colleagues, who were disguised as the school guards, to pay attention to the whereabouts of the Vietnamese student.
Outside the hall, Red Scorpion looked at his student who was walking towards him. Vigilantly, he looked around. "Done?" he asked the student in their native language. Even if someone could understand their language, they would assume that he was asking whether the student had turned in the exam paper.


Through years of abuse and death threats, Ye Jian is not so ready to bid adieu to this world just yet! Fortunately, destiny has granted her another shot at life. Only this time, she is determined to become the master of her own fate and retaliate her oppressors from her previous life. It's payback time.
 
Although reborn with beauty and youth, Ye Jian obviously holds higher pursuits. In this life, she is determined to become an extraordinary commando. No, she does not need love, family, or any affection! 
 
He is born in a powerful family; and step-by-step, he becomes the youngest Major General through his own merits. He is drawn to her every move, despite her repeatedly shunning him.
 
"What you need is love, my little fox," he whispers.
"Get lost! I need bullets!" She steps away.
 
Behold. Let this novel take you through the warm, happy, loyal, and passionate story of the aggressive military couple.



"Stop that, Love. He’s about to cry,” Mew said worriedly. I just laughed at it and looked at Mild and Deimos again. 

"Come here, baby. I'll teach you how to play," Mild said and lifted Deim to sit on his lap then handed the controller to Deimos. I chuckled because Mild couldn't stand our baby. 

“So naughty!" the latter beside me said. 

We were just chilling for a couple of hours until it's dinner time. They finished their game and we went to the table together. 

“Wow! The aroma, ‘Nay Sonya!” We call her Nanay, mother in English because she’s like one to us. “Looks like I’m on a cheat day,” Boat said when he saw the dishes. 

There’s a buttered shrimp, fried chicken, and many more. Who wouldn’t love this kind of food, right? 

"Let's pray!" Deimos said so we started to pray. 

Wonder why Deimos always leads the prayer? He is the one assigned there because we do not want him to forget about praying. His prayers are also fun because he tells different stories while praying. 

"Amen." We said in unison when Deimos finished praying. He was sitting next to me and Mew was on the other side. "Baby, what do you want to eat?" I asked Deimos because he does not like many dishes. One dish is fine with him. 

"I want the shrimp, Dada!" I immediately looked at Mew. "Aww, Dada is allergic to shrimp," 

We exchanged seats because he volunteered to feed Deimos and peel the shrimp for him. 

"Oh, I'm sorry, son. I didn't ask what food is not allowed for you," ‘Nay Sonya said her sorry. 

"It's okay, don't worry. They haven't eaten shrimp for a long time because of me, they don't cook like that in our house. Look how they missed the shrimp." I mentioned and pointed at our companions because they were enjoying the shrimp. 

Ever since I was a child, I was really allergic to shrimp so I stopped eating it even though it was delicious because I had severe itching every time. 

Deimos, on the other hand, can eat that for the first time so maybe he prefers to eat shrimp as it is new to him. 

"Yummy?" I heard Mew ask his son and Deimos gave a thumbs up. He seems to enjoy the shrimp. I got up to get some porridge soup and some vegetables. I put it on Mew's plate. 

"Let’s share,” says Mew, and I nodded in response. 

An hour later, we finished eating and got up to clean. 

‘Nay Sonya wanted to clean it alone but we didn’t let her. She’s been taking care of us all day so we insisted on helping her clean the house. During our three days stay here at Mew's house, I can say that the people here are very attentive. 

When I left the kitchen, I saw that Mew had also cleaned Deimos and had changed his clothes. 

He usually sleeps around 8:30 or 9 PM, depending on his mood. We do not allow him to sleep late or be addicted to gadgets because we prefer the physical activities he does such as playing physical games or going with Mama to walk every morning. He also loves to build puzzles and he is not too fond of cars or what is commonly loved by kids. He prefers to have a hard time playing with his toys. In fact, I will not be surprised if he grows up very smart. 

He must have inherited it from his father. How I wish I was smart too. 

 

"Baby Deim, what do you want to do tomorrow?" I asked Deimos while he was playing puzzles. 

That makes him drowsy after a couple of hours. Look at him, building hard puzzles just to pass time. His Papa was helping him through. 

"Dada, I want to watch the sunset too with Papa," he mumbled, still focused on his puzzles. 

He never really forget about that. He always wants to watch the sunset. 

Half an hour had passed and I saw Deimos yawning already. He still does not say that he wants to sleep so I did not ask first. 

”Baby,” I didn’t know who Mew was calling so I didn’t look as I was building my own puzzle. 

Actually, the two of them helped each other, and then I was alone and I’m not even into playing these kinds of games so I can’t help but frown because the puzzle was small in size. How do they enjoy playing this? 

I felt someone poking my shoulders so I turned to Mew because he was the one next to me. "Hm?" I said while playing. 

"I was calling you, earlier," Mew said. I immediately apologized to him and stopped playing first. 

”I thought you were talking to Deim, sorry. Anyway, why were you calling me? ” 

"He said he wants to sleep now," he whispered. Eh? 

"When did he say that?" I feel like it was just his thoughts. 

“He’s been yawning for several times already.” I looked at Deim. 

"Baby, are you sleepy?" 

“Yes, Dada. But I want to sleep beside Mama-Lola because she’s always sleeping alone. ” Aww, my baby’s so sweet. 

"Are you sure?" I asked again and he nodded. He yawned again so Mew carried him to Mama's room. 

We knocked first and it immediately opened, 

”Mama, Deim want to sleep here. Maybe he misses you, ”I said and Mama smiled. She let us in and lay Deimos on the bed. 

“Goodnight, Dada! Goodnight, Papa! I love you both,” Deimos said and hugged us. We also said goodnight to Mama and then closed the door. 

When I closed the door, I wondered why we were just standing in front of Mama's door. 

"Come on, let's go to bed!" I shouted at him because he was still not moving from that place. 

"Baby," 

"What?" I asked because he looked tense. 

"Are you sure about this?" Huh? 

"About what?" What is he saying? 

"Uhm, if you want, I can sleep in another room." 

”Why? Don't you want to sleep with me?” He came closer to me so I walked again because I thought he would follow. 

“Uhm, it’s because,” he hung up. 

"What is it? What’s with you? If you don't want to, then don’t. I’ll be heading to the room if you keep on whining.” I started to get annoyed because he had not yet said what he wanted to say. 

”Hey, hey, love. Just a moment. I will explain,” he held my arm and his eyes were pleading. 

"What is it?" Irritated cause he has a lot of excuses. 

“Okay, chill. It’s just that I can’t guarantee anything other than us, sleeping. You know how hard it is for me to control and I don’t want to do something without your consent. So, I'll just sleep in another room so we can be comfortable and,“ I didn't let him finish with whatever he wanted to say and I immediately went for a quick smack on his lips. 

"Our room or the guest room?" I asked while looking straight into his eyes. 

“Baby,” he whined like it’s so hard to choose. 

"You choose," I said and left to go to the bedroom. 

A few seconds after, I heard the room open and I was a hundred percent sure it’s Mew. I went straight to the restroom to clean up when he hugged me from behind, placing soft kisses on my shoulder. 

"I love you," he uttered. 

Then, the next thing that happened was only between the two of us. 

It was when both worlds collided.

"Do you think I'm glad to see you every day, at work, acting like nothing happened? Do you know how much pain you’ve caused me?"

Mew and Gulf were in a long-term relationship until the day came that they had to break-up. Little did Mew know, a year after, someone knocked on Gulf's door, holding a newly born baby. Who could that baby be? What will be his role in Mew and Gulf's life? 

Is it worth the wait?

Once the decision was made to leave quickly, it didn't take long, for them to gather everything up. Thanks to the system, he was able to absorb their entire farm. Marvin, Bart, and the other farmhands all agreed to come with them.

With their consent, he was able to absorb the entire surrounding area as well. Now that it was tucked away inside the space, it would remove any evidence, while allowing his parents and everyone to come along.

Popping up around the already existing farm inside his spatial world, they were quickly greeted by the citizens. His parents wouldn't be bored, they were recognized by the system, which gave them a lot of permissions.

His father saw men fishing, off to the side of a small stream. Kissing his wife, he grabbed some of his fishing equipment, eager to join them. Laughing playfully, she handed him the tackle box, when he came back a minute later.

Heading over to the restaurant, she saw that the menu was missing a few things. Putting on an apron, she headed into the pantry to gather some ingredients. The legendary 'home cooking' was about to be added to the menu.

Seeing the world for the first time, the farmhands and their families were impressed. This was an amazing place, clean and free of danger. Witnessing the farm, they saw how it sprouted its own crops while absorbing others.

Everyone could see, that not only was it a much better location, but they'd also have a lot more free time to relax and enjoy themselves. Naturally, people would work to increase the space, mixing a bit of the spatial earth and water each day.

Taking steps to ensure that everyone stayed happy and healthy, Zanir introduced a new building. Titled the 'Recreation Room', it was a building that had a single large room, sectioned off into a few different spaces.

The main section was the largest, there were a few tables, where people could eat together or relax and play games. He'd produced a few basic dice and cards, using the system to print out a few books, that detailed the various games you could play.

Off to one side, there a sectioned off area, where younger children could play. It was padded to ensure they couldn't hurt themselves. It was filled with a variety of bright and colorful toys, he'd hoped they would like them.

Using the system, he'd produced some wooden blocks with letters on them. They could be stacked and arranged. There were also various toy figurines carved out, varying from knights and mages to boats and carriages.

He'd also placed a few basic coloring books, using wax the system dyed as crayons. Making sure they were safe and non-toxic, he knew these would delight the children. Before moving on, he also created a set of building blocks.

Interconnecting pieces, allowed them to build anything they wanted to. With all of these things, the kids here would be happier. That, in turn, would also make the parents happier. Moving over to the last section, he wanted to create something for the older residents.

Transforming the final section, he designed it into a comfortable mini parlor. Blocking off some of the noise, it would give them a quiet spot where they could relax. With several comfortable recliner style chairs, they could relax in here together.

To help keep their minds sharp, he put in several things, like chess and checkers. There were also several kinds of crossword puzzles, word searches, and numbers games like Sudoku. Stepping back, he inspected his work.

Satisfied, he looked around and saw that it had something for all ages and groups. Hopefully, this would become, a place where the community could gather, to both have fun and relax. The last thing he wanted, was for anyone to feel stifled or trapped in the spatial world.

With the introduction and overview complete, he cut the big red ribbon in front of the building. Everyone cheered and clapped, people only had the simplest games and toys here, not even the largest cities had a dedicated rec room.

It didn't take long for everyone to shuffle in, exploring the area. The kids were the fastest, they all ran in, screaming with delight when they saw so many toys. Seeing the various kids playing together, the parents were moved.

Children were inherently innocent for the most part; they didn't discriminate against people. The farmhand's children had no issue playing with the kids who were formerly homeless. Kids just see another kid, there wasn't a distinction in social class.

Now that the children had started playing, their parents sat together in the middle section, watching over them. Introducing themselves, they quickly made friends, learning how to play card and dice games. Talking about their respective kids, the parents found out they had a lot in common.

With noisy kids playing, the older crowd moved into the mini parlor area. Seeing the comfy recliners and chairs, they helped each other get settled in. Soon they were chatting happily about 'the good old days'.

Bringing out the puzzles and games, they were also having a great time, seeing such strange new ideas and concepts. Looking at everyone, having fun and enjoying the building, his friends and family were very proud.

This would go a long way to improving everyone's morale, which was a key aspect of the spatial world. It would also kill two birds with one stone, both being the right thing to do, while also gaining him more points, from even happier citizens.

Now that he'd taken his family, friends, and even his home with him, it was time to go. He wanted to stop by Trostin, completing his deals quickly there, before setting off for the first mission. With nothing holding him back, any longer, he was now free to travel the world at large.

"Wait, if you can make coloring books, doesn't that mean you can make comic books?"

"Haha, just make a list of what you want Dante. I'll see how much they cost from my system."

Taking a few guards out of the system, he repaired the land, so it wasn't completely barren, while Dante got the carriage ready. Once they finished up, they headed down the road towards Trostin.

Join our protagonist Zanir Coffey as he unlocks the mysterious Dimension System which allows him to absorb the environment around him.

Seemingly able to absorb an endless amount of material, he will have to use this new system to survive in a brutal new world.

Armed with the knowledge of modern day technology and his ability to manipulate the world around him, he will craft an empire the likes of which have never been seen.

To reach his final goal he will have to go far beyond a single planet, in a single dimension. His journey will take him to the stars and beyond.

She then promised the three children that she would finish looking at the castle before returning to Ran Ran's room.
When she returned to her room, Ji Ziming was currently sitting before the building blocks and carefully studying them. He found that, other than the things they liked, there was another set of riddles in the building blocks. It was a riddle only the two of them could guess.
"I knew you'd be back."
The man did not look behind him to know that Pei Ge had returned.
"How did you know?"
She was perplexed. Don't tell me that he heard what the three children had said?
"Because the entrance to these building blocks said that two people are required to complete the riddles inside, so I guessed that those two boys must be in our daughter's room when you went looking for her. They're just waiting for you to go over to tell you that you must return to your room and solve the puzzles with me," explained the man.
"Puzzles?"
She also sat down beside him to look at the building blocks. She felt as though she were in an alternate space with a test given to them by their children.
"Come on. Let's see what those kids are up to."
Ji Ziming took off his suit jacket and exhaled as he looked at the building blocks before him. His dark eyes were filled with vigor and excitement to try the test.
"Come on. I want to see what the three children are up to as well."
Pei Ge also blinked her eyes, then followed his instructions to look for answers in the blocks. All the answers joined to form a sentence.
At the same time, An An and Ji Chi were in Ran Ran's room, guessing how much time their parents needed to find the answers.
"I think half an hour."
"One hour."
"I think you both are wrong. They should take a night."
Right after the girl said this, both boys were stunned. They did not know that, in their sister's eyes, their parents were actually this stupid.
"Sis, daddy is so smart; I think half an hour is already fast enough."
An An opposed her view with a wise look on his tender face.
"But I think mommy is very stupid. Didn't you hear daddy calling her stupid?"
The girl blinked her large eyes which were filled with the innocence of a child. It could be seen that she was most concerned about her father instead of her mother.
"Second brother, do you think our parents need as long as one hour?"
Ji Chi started pondering on it. He had indeed not seen how long their parents needed to solve something, but from how 'big' this show they had prepared for the two, and his last and most important clue, he did not think that they could find the answer to everything quickly.
"I think half an hour is already very fast."
He reached the same conclusion his brother did.
"See; half an hour is already very fast. Sis, you should listen to us. Your second brother and I know all of daddy and mommy's plans, as well as what they like."
"Isn't it easy to know what they like? You can ask Auntie Zhang, granny, and even grandma."
The girl refused to admit defeat. She just felt that their parents would take a night. She did not know where her confidence came from, but she was just this certain.
In truth, Ji Ziming and Pei Ge only took less than ten minutes to find all the clues. The clues joined together to form a sentence which pointed to the seventh book on the fourth row of her bookshelf. On page 23 of the book in question, there was a letter wedged in.
Most of what was written in the letter was about how grateful the three kids were to them. It also wrote about their feelings for their parents. It turned out that their daughter did not get sick by accident. It was because the three had gone to the fake mountain to play with water.
Ran Ran accidentally fell into the pond and got soaked; hence, she got a fever after being chilled by the wind earlier this afternoon.
"So those three are this playful when we aren't home. I haven't heard their teacher speak of it. No wonder our daughter was so afraid of me showing up before her teacher. Turns out she's afraid that I'll ask the teacher about her."
"She fears you the most, for you always know what she's thinking. I'm different. She relies on me more. Compared to you, she must want to tell me more things."
"This is their fault, though. They should be punished for doing something wrong. How dared they anger and chase away the teacher I had painstakingly hired? If not because we were busy, they'd likely overturn the entire house."
Pei Ge read the letter and saw how the trio had even told her at the end not to get angry.
Still, how could she possibly not be angry? She even hoped to run to Ran Ran's room now and asked them what they had done to the teacher.
"Hire another one if they don't like the teacher. If they still don't like it, send them to a private and prestigious school. Don't be this angry. It's fine."
Ji Ziming consoled her. As long as she was not angry, there was still room for salvation.
"Okay. I will see how much cheekier they can be after going to school. No wonder they're so obedient today. I didn't even notice that we didn't see the teacher I hired when we came back earlier."
Pei Ge's eyes twinkled as she thought of how it was fine if the three did not like the teacher, yet they even did something wrong and purposely tried to cover up their wrongdoings.
"Alright, don't be angry. They are just children. Compared to them, I am more concerned about you. I will have to go get payback with them if something happens to you from this anger."
The man looked at her with his deep eyes. She could feel the warmth coming from him. As long as she liked it, he could give her so much more. If one teacher was no good, then change another one. If it still did not work out, he could even bring all the teachers over to her for her to choose from and to test one by one.
"Alright. It's not that I'm angry. Let's just leave it like this tonight. Mom will go take care of Ran Ran later, so let's not go look for our kids tonight. Let them know that we aren't easily cajoled."
She pursed her lips lightly, eyeing the building blocks they had deconstructed. It was a big house, but there were just no more than ten useful hints. Still, it was something An An and Ji Chi had spent a lot of effort building. Disregarding how they would feel heartache, even she felt heartache as she thought of how long they had taken to build this, yet the two of them had easily deconstructed it.
"The kids are insensible. We can educate them tomorrow. We should do what must be done, and we shouldn't do what we mustn't."


After a series of life-changing events, Pei Ge decides to start anew and rediscover her place in this world. She gets a new job, new friends and… a new boss whom she mistakes as a male host!

He helps her to get revenge on a back-stabbing friend, supports her when it seems that the world has given up on her, encourages her to be more confident about herself and even… messes up her blind dates!

With her strong working abilities and fiery attitude, she manages to climb up the ranks in the company (under the devious scheme of a certain CEO) and even gains a fan girl who can’t wait to be her sister-in-law.

As Pei Ge navigates through the ups and downs of office politics, family drama, finding her right partner and societal expectations, she realizes that things are not as simple as it seemed and everything she had believed in is tested…

The Big Misunderstanding:

“You asshole! Why didn’t you use protection?! I’m pregnant!”
“…It’s not mine.”
“Asshole! You actually dare to not admit it?! I gave all my firsts to you! You jerk!”
…
At the gynecologist, she read her pregnancy lab report and was stunned: Irregular period.
The man raised an eyebrow and smirked, “Didn’t you make a ruckus about being pregnant with my child? Where is the child?!”
“…” Who is scared of who? Let’s make a bet!

Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.

Eleanor Roosevelt

***

RIELLE

The gunman almost got me! Halos mahimatay ako sa sobrang kaba lalo na nang sumabog sa harapan namin ang ulo ni Miss Ryanne.

Nakakaloka! Parang hindi ko na kaya. Hindi ko alam kung pusa ako sa past life ko o sadyang swerte lang ako dahil umabot ako sa 7th floor. I survived twenty three floors! 

All those that happened for the past four days. Were those part of perfectly plotted massacre na hindi ko mawari kung ano ang dahilan? Ayokong gambalain pa ang iba tungkol sa naiisip kong baka naipit kami sa gitna ng isang business war o mafia wars dahil baka nag-isip na naman ako ng kawirduhan. Mina wouldn't like it. Everyone in this floor wouldn't be pleased. Magmumukha akong baliw sa mga teorya ko --as usual.

But sometimes, if not always, my guts are true. Maraming beses ko nang napatunayang ang kutob ko ay almost accurate. 

Halo-halo ang laman ng isip ko habang hinahabol namin pababa sa seventh floor si Larry --ang killer na siyang may pakana ng lahat. Pero sigurado ako, hindi lang siya ang killer. Hindi lang sina Mildred, Maddie at Satana. Someone more powerful was behind this.

The whole set-up --the puzzles, subways, secret doors, riddles. Everything was created by not just five people but many. Kaya naniniwala akong may sindikato sa likod ng mga kaganapan. 

But to what extent?

Papaano nila naatim na pumatay ng halos limampong katao? Hindi kaya terorismo ang nasa likod nito? 

Gulong-gulo ako!

"Stay five meters behind!" Malakas na sigaw ni Andreas na tila naalerto at sinapian ng isang sinaunang assassin. Hindi naman ito ganito sa mga naunang floors. Naalerto lang siya kanina nang namatay si Miss Ryanne. Mukhang matagal na siyang nagpipigil na ipakita ang tunay niyang pagkatao --isa iyon ay ang pagiging alerto at maliksi niya. 

Hindi nakinig sa kaniya si Zyril, isa pang misteryosong babae. Bumaba hanggang sa paanan ng hagdanan si Zyril habang si Andreas ay hindi mapakaling ikinalat ang tingin. His knuckles were hardly gathered together. Mukhang doon niya inipon ang lahat ng gigil niya sa katawan. 

"Why are we even looking for Larryson here? Hindi ba't sa plenum galing ang bala? He's definitely upstairs!" Dinig kong giit ni Mina. Nakahawak pa rin ito sa braso ko na tila takot na takot sa muntikan ko nang pagkamatay. 

Narinig ko namang sumagot si Vladimir mula sa likuran namin. "We only have less than sixty eight hours to get down. Satana mentioned that we must get to the ground before we ran out of time."

"Tama si Vlad, we're not running after Larryson. We are running to beat the time. If he gets on the way, there is nothing better we can do but kill him." Andreas agreed. Humakbang ito papasok sa seventh floor habang nakawarning sign pa rin ang kaliwang palad nito. 

Nagbago ang aura ng mga tao sa paligid. Maliban sa kaibigan kong si Mina na poker face lagi, naging mas seryoso ang kanina'y warfreak na si Andreas. Tila naging isang ahente naman ng NBI si Zyril pati na rin si Vlad. 

Had they been this way since this massacre started?

"Let's keep going. Watch each other's back while Zyril and I try to figure out how to get to the ground before all of us turn into dusts here." Untag ni Andreas na patuloy sa pagmamasid sa paligid. 

Nasa likod niya ang tapang-tapangang si Zyril na alerto ring pinapakiramdaman ang paligid.

"H-how can Zyril and you solve those riddles and puzzles then?" Hindi ko napigilang sambit. I always urge myself to speak if I wanted to mean something. This time, I mean it. "Vlad and Mina almost solved all puzzles on the upper floors. So p-"

Hinigpitan ni Mina ang hawak nito sa braso ko saka seryoso itong tumingin. Bahagya itong umiling-iling, then she gave me a warning stare as if speaking further can really put me into a great danger. 

"We can trust Andreas and Zyril. If they need our help, we're easily alerted." Vladimir's statement seemed to save me from doom. Mukhang kumalma naman ang kanina'y iritableng reaksyon nina Andreas at Zyril. 

Hindi na ako umimik pa. Minalyn had sacrificed a lot for me to stay alive. Marami nang namatay and I should not waste the chance of getting lucky with my big mouth. I should trust Mina. Always.  

Nakasunod ako kay Mina,  Natas, Bella, Vlad, Andreas at Zyril habang tinatahak ang kabuuan ng seventh floor. Alerto ang bawat isa saamin. Pigil ang aking paghinga habang nakakapit sa mangas ng damit ni Mina. 

"Just stay close Rielle. Do not ever open your big mouth. Stay alert and we'll get through this." Mahinahon at mahinang sambit ni Mina habang naglalakad kami kasunod ng iba pa.

"If it's my time, well for sure you wouldn't like it, it's really my time. If the end of me calls to saving you, I'd end me and let you live." Wala sa sarili kong nasambit. Those words just automatically came out from my mouth. Like a divine power had the total control of me to say it.

Hindi umimik si Mina. Pero napansin kong may halong takot at lungkot sa mukha nito habang patuloy kami sa paglalakad patungo sa gitna ng seventh floor. We were feeling the same amount of fear -the fear of losing each other.

Ilang saglit lang ay tumigil sa isang punto sina Andreas at Zyril. Napatigil din kami sa paglalakad nang bumungad saamin ang nakalapat sa sahig na limang math puzzles. Mga logic questions at mga numerong hindi ko maintindihan.

Sa baba ng limang mumber puzzles ay may isang digital device din na may limang puwang sa screen at isang kwadradong numeric keypad.

Vlad stepped forward pero pinigilan siya ni Zyril.

Andreas kneeled down as if he already got all five answers. Muling pinasadahan ni Vlad ang mga number puzzles. Saka kinapa ang numeric keypad. Walang alinlangang pinindot nito ang mga numerong 10723 na marahil ay sagot mula sa limang number puzzles.

Isang malakas na kalabog ang narinig mula sa ilalim ng lupa. It's as if something was about to move or open.

Laking gulat ng lahat nang biglang napunit ang carpeted floor at nahila sa magkabilang dako ang isang kwadradong bahagi ng semento. The opening revealed the sixth floor.

Most of us gasped for what was shown but I wondered for something. How did Andreas answer the five number slash logic puzzles so easily? All I knew was he's a hardheaded fool who knew nothing but punch another fool on the face.

I was wrong.

Nagising lang ang diwa ko nang marinig ko na ang mabibilis na yapak ni Zyril pabalik saamin. No hindi ko namalayang tumakbo ito para maghanap ng malaking lubid na magagamit namin pababa ng sixth floor.

Vlad, Natas and Andreas quickly created a knot in the rope. Ang mga buhol na 'yon ang magsisilbing kapitan namin pababa. I can easily jump on the lower grounds pero mukhang medyo mataas nga ang ceiling ng bawat floors ng building.

As Zyril finished hitching the rope around a nearby post, Andreas started to test the rope and later on went down first. Matamang naghintay ito sa sixth floor habang sinisenyasang bumaba na kami. Bella went next bago kami ni Mina. Sumunod si Natas at Zyril at panghuli si Vlad.

Nakahinga ng maluwag ang lahat nang makababa kami sa ikaanim na palapag.

Mina's slightly relieved face gave me an almost convincing smile. Then she said, "Six more and we'll be back to normal. Just stay close."

Tumango ako.

Nauna nang naglakad palibot sa sixth floor sina Andreas, Natas at Zyril. Nakasunod ako kay Mina. Bago ako humakbang ay muli kong tinanay ang malaking kwadradong lagusan mula sa seventh floor.

Then.

What I saw made me see death for the uncounted times --Larryson with his gun. Nakatutok iyon sa nakatalikod nang si Mina. Napansin ko ang mabilis na pagpihit ng mga daliri ng lalaki sa gantilyo ng baril.

Wala sa sarili kong tinakbo ang kinaroroonan ni Mina. Napasigaw ako. Gulat na gulat na lumingon si Mina kasunod ng pagyakap ko sa kanya.

Then the entire sixth floor heard the sound of death. Dalawang magkasunod na putok ang narinig.

At first I wasn't feeling anything. Hanggang sa maramdaman kong lumusot ang mga bala sa aking likuran.

Larryson was a certified killer. He knew every human's easy kill are the kidneys. Ang he was able to shoot them. Bulls eye.

Naramdaman ko ang pangangatog ng aking buong katawan kasunod ng pagbagsak ng aking mga tuhod. Pakiramdam ko'y biglang binawian ng lakas ang aking kalamnan.

"Rielle!" Histerikal na sigaw ni Mina na kaagad akong nasalo sa kanyang mga bisig. At dahil may kabigatan ako'y pareho kaming bumagsak sa sahig.

Hindi ko magawang magsalita. Narinig at nakita ko ang mabilis na paglapit ng mga kasamahan ko sa kinaroroonan namin.

"Rielle." Mina's tears suddenly rolled on her cheers. Mahigpit ang pagkakahawak nito sa kaliwang kamay ko. "Rielle, please don't. Please don't leave me. You're my only family."

Doon nagsimulang umagos ang mga luha sa mata ko. It felt like I disappointed her again for leaving her. I know how hard it was for her to lose her loved ones. Now her friends. "M-Mi-Minnn-aa." I whispered. Nanlalamig na ang buong katawan ko.

"Why did you save me? Why?" She was crying. Nonstop.

I saw Bella behind her in tears as well. Vlad was in pain and Zyril felt it too.

Pinilit kong ngumiti. My tongue felt numb already. Hindi ko alam kung diretso pa ang pananalita ko pero sinubukan ko pa rin ang magsalita. "Y-you alw-ways save me. I owe y-y-you m-my l-life. I w-wont r-regret d-dying j-just because I s-saved y-you."

Humagulgol si Mina. The more I felt the sadness, the pain and longingness. Hindi na ito umimik pa.

"I f-feel cold." Nasambit ko.

Mina held me closer to her. Naramdaman ko ang mainit na luha nitong bumagsak sa pisngi ko. Pigil ang paghagulgol nito habang kinakanta niya ang theme song naming matalik na magkaibigan.

Oh, why you look so sad, the tears are in your eyes,
Come on and come to me now, and don't be ashamed to cry,
Let me see you through, 'cause I've seen the dark side too.
When the night falls on you, you don't know what to do,
Nothing you confess could make me love you less,

I'll stand by you,
I'll stand by you, won't let anybody hurt you,
I'll stand by you

Ang boses ni Mina, sintunado a rin. Pero kahit gano'n pa man, iyon parin ang pinakamagandang kantang narinig ng diwa ko.

###

30 Doors


50 people inside a cage;
Many were invited
Few were not.
30 doors to get through;
29 doors to unlock
10 puzzles
8 full of riddles
Seven rooms of death
Four to survive
One that saves life.

50 strangers inside a room
49 to kill
One mastermind
29 unsafe
10 missed the puzzle
Eight failed riddles
Seven fatalities
Four to survive
One that ends life

30 rooms
30 floors
30 doors of survival.

"You gonna die"

I was sitting in the clinic, in front of me was my doctor with uninterested look in his face. I was sitting there, in the chair and was so, ANGRY!!! I worked so hard for everything now all was for nothing.

Today should have been the best day of my life and it should has been just an ordinary check- up for my new job. But no! Life had other plans for me!!!

"Are you absolutely sure? Please check it again!" I spoked with gritting teeth. "There is nothing that I have to check again Mr. McCullen. The Test is to 100% positiv." He took the file with my datas and looked into them. "Yep, Cancer in the End-Stadium. There is nothing that we can do for you. You just should make your calls." 

And there it was again. The Anger. This deep anger, that want to break out off me and destroy everything in my way. Already in the young age of 7 it made my life difficult, and because of it I nearly broke another kid's arm. And now, with 25, it's not better.

I stand up from my chair and rushed out of the small room of the doctor, out in the floor.
He didn't even tried to stop me, he just putted the papers away. I ran out of the clinic, in the direction of my flat. I rushed the stairs upstair with just one tought : Why why why why.....
I putted everything that I had to have a good live. Just yesterday, I finally I got my Job at one of the best gaming company's in the world: Ax&Sword.

What is Ax&Sword? Oh, just one of the best gaming company's in the world, and the only one that was going to bring the first VRMMORPG out, and that in the year 2020! And this company was in search of new Programmer. When I heard about it I rushed to the next sister-company of Ax&Sword. The problem was : I was too late, and now they needed only one more Programmer and there were two of us. So, they made a competition out of it : Whoever made the better App would get the Job and depending on how good the App was, he would get a bonus. So I started
programming. We had a time limit of 2 Weeks and I worked my ass off. I just sleeped like 3 hours a day. And after the two weeks, it finally ended. I stepped into the building and went right into the office of the Vice-Manager from the daughter-company. I went straight into it and there he sat. Marco Wesner. He was a big and Muscular guy which you wouldn't expect in a gaming company. He had pig -like yes, a short militar-cut and smelled like he had 3 doe-sprays on . I gave him my USB-Stick with my Gaming -App, a game where you would have to solve many different puzzles and with increase in level, the difficulty of the puzzles will also increase. My name for it was : Puzzle Labyrinth

 So there I was, waiting, afraid that it maybe was not enough to make it into the company. Mr. Wesner sticked the Stick into his Computer and looked into my programs. After a few moments did he looked up with a shocked expression on his face.

"Come with me please"

A little bit confused and afraid of what happened, I walked and started looking around. We walked out of his office and up the building on the stairs. When we were at the 20th floor, Mr Pig-eye was sweating like he ran a marathon. On the entire floor was nothing, except one door. We were at a bigger but much more simpler office. Only one picture with a Man with a majestic deer antler, surrounded with many animals, fantasy and real ones . Suddenly Wesner started speaking with great respect in his Voice "Mr. Orner, I have something very interesting here"
Just in this moment I looked into the middle of the office. There stand a big desk with a computer of the newest generation. Behind that desk sat a man who didn't looked particularly special, but when he suddenly opened his eyes, I was shocked. Blue eyes like two glacier looked at me like they wanted to look at my very soul. But this just lasted just a few short moments because the already familiar anger came up within but now, she wasn't like anything before. Where she before was like a furry beast with a insatiable hunger, now she was like a beast that finally founded a worthy enemy. So I stared right back at him and we had a silent stare-fight. After what felt like minutes, were just mere seconds, I looked away under the cold gaze from him

"Mmm... Good, pretty good." He spoke with a deep bass, and extended his arm when he talked. Mr. Wesner gave him the the USB-Stick without any delay and Mr. Orner putted him into his computer.  

"What we have here is really impressive Jack."  "W-W-Where did you...?"  "Found out your name? Oh I have many means to get Information Jack McCullen.

Jack McCallun is living his life with  his secret's like many others. But then he got a diagnosis that chanced his life

They lead us to a large abandoned building. There were signs showing the latest fashion from 50 years ago. It was made out of tan brick, that seemed to be crumbling. It minds as well be a pile of dust by now. Victor and I held hands as we exited the train. 

"Remember your objective is to get out alive, not all of you will succeed in this. The Game is full of mental, and physical puzzles the strongest can only endure. Teamwork is the key. Those who make it to door 1, will receive a prize, a great prize that is unknown to everyone. Good luck, and may Cyanke chooses your side. ," A man and a woman say in unison, as the train door closes and we are left in the crumbling building. 

"Okay, everybody, we need to work together, you heard them, teamwork is the key" A tall girl with ebony black hair and pale skin. 

"It's a deathtrap, we might as well just give up now," The small thin boy said. 

"Lucas, we have to try, for Minwill Harbour and for Mama and Papa," She was kneeling on the ground, her hands cupping the small boys face. People were talking amongst themselves.  

"And what do you suppose we do," I call out. They stop talking 

"Well, how about we select a leader or leaders," 

"I will," Victor said behind me, "I will be a leader," People talked amongst themselves.

"I will also," The girl said.

"How are we supposed to trust you? We don't even know your names,"

"I am Claudia Nelson from Minwill Harbour, or area 5.I was brought here just like all of you, against my will to entertain our King," Claudia hissed the word King. 

"And who might he be?" A girl with bright blonde hair and startling blue eyes asked. Everyone's attention turned to Victor, he looked nervous, and grabbed my hand. 

"Victor. Victor Cavendish,"

"The Kings Game," takes place in a dystopian society where 32 kids, between the ages of 8-20, are choose. to survive and those who make it all the way through gets a chance of a lifetime.

Jessamine Wydville along with her best friend, Victor Cavendish, gets chosen from their village, Sleepy Falls, a quaint little town at the edge of the Soulless King's rules. The 32, champions are thrown into an abandoned building, full of creatures from what's seems like other worlds and challenges only the bravest and strongest can endure.

~~~part 1 of a 2 part series~~~

|Fantasty|Sci-fi|Dystiopian| 

|Some Language|

Hi! @Crazy_Ass_Girl

Thanks for voting and for requesting for a book review. I haven't read or critiqued books in a while and I hope this will be of some help. Note that I don't sugarcoat my reviews, but expect them to be helpful and constructive, instead of just being overly harsh or critical, or too general that it didn't do anything to help you improve as a writer.

Moving on!

So you asked that I critique your ongoing story 'Our Journey'. I have read your first chapters and now I'm publishing this critique which should serve as a guide to help you improve your writing skills. 

POINTS of FOCUS:  PLOT, GRAMMAR, DIALOGUE

COVER: 

the cover looks okay. 

maybe the font style and size could be changed since the part saying 'A Story By' isn't legible. 

also, some splashes of color could make your cover more attractive so you could grab the attention of the readers searching for new teen fics/stories to add to their reading list. 

BLURB:

mostly well-written and interesting premise.

there were some punctuation errors but they're very minor. :)

e.g.

Natalie Mattson, the daughter of the well-known investor Dylan Mattson, was perfect. 


PROLOGUE:

the prologue was short and served its purpose, i think. it gave some intrigue/mystery and caught my interest. there were a few issues with sentence construction and punctuation but they're very easy to fix. :) 

e.g.

I answered it after a second of hesitation. "Hello?" I asked in a muted voice, uncertain of this mysterious phone call's intention.

*insert paragraph break*

A pretty girl like you shouldn't be walking in the night all alone," answered a cold and thick male voice on the other end, sending a shiver down my spine.

I spun, scanning my surroundings for anyone around. "Who are you?" I asked, trying to sound tough, but he had already ended the call.

1st chapter:

In the first part, the paragraphs lacked scenic descriptions and I couldn't imagine the setting. Although there was some character building involved,  I couldn't quite visualize the characters and their reactions due to the lack of descriptive imagery in the narration. The common creative writing rule of  "showing more and telling less" would be applicable in most parts. 

Some punctuation errors were a bit distracting but I guess that's just my inner Grammar Nazi talking :)  
Still, proofreading this can help improve your narration, and would definitely be something your readers will appreciate about your work.

Some edits I suggest:

"...a few minutes ago," I said, tears pooling in my eyes.

"Aren't you supposed to know?" Mom glared at me. ('mom glared' can't be used as a dialog tag so the first part of the sentence, which is 'Mom', should be written in uppercase.

On the other hand, I got low grades no matter how much I studied, had a limited amount of friends, and barely knew how to do anything other than solving mystery puzzles.

"How am I supposed to know? (don't use two or more types of punctuation at the same time) I wasn't in the house when she left," I complained. ('I complained' is a dialog tag so a comma would be more appropriate before the closing quotation marks) Then it hit me. "Wait-- I have an idea. She might be at Landon's party!"  (omit 'I exclaimed' because the tag would make this part redundant since you've already used the exclamation point after her dialogue)

*insert paragraph break*

"Well, then. Call Landon. We'd really want to see your sister come home safe." Father scowled at me fiercely. (try reading the dialogues aloud. if they don't sound natural, scrap them or revise)

 *insert paragraph break* 

"Yes, Father," I said, looking down.

Despite our differences, Natalie and I loved (tense switch from past to present) each other so much and treated each other with compassion. She always helped (tense switch) me with homework and thoroughly explained things I didn't understand. Without my big sis, I didn't (tense switch)know what I'd do. She had(tense switch) trouble 

So we usually spent (tense switch)  time playing with puzzles.

Landon was (tense switch) Natalie's closest guy friend. 

**This is another part where the narration info-dumped. Try to lessen this in the first chapters. You could try incorporating the main characters' backgrounds and relationships with the other characters  in a subtler way, little by little in the next chapters, instead of telling the reader everything about the characters' personal lives in just one big group of 'telling' paragraphs. 

DIALOGUE:

"Nat! We were so worried!" My mother wailed. ('wailed' can't be used as a dialog tag so capitalize 'M' in "My mother") 

*insert paragraph break every time another character speaks/reacts*

"Don't ever pull that stunt on us again." Father came forward to embrace both of us. 

"Where were you?" Father was yelling again. "You made us worry. And your sister didn't know where you were." Father gave Diane the stink eye.   (Notice I changed up the dialogues a bit; some parts didn't sound realistic and natural.)

Instead of overemphasizing their parents' dislike for Diane through lengthy and sometimes unnatural-sounding dialogue, you could include the characters' descriptions and reactions in the narration. 

Write the imagery in a detailed manner that will show their emotions and personality more effectively, instead of just telling the reader what the parents think about Diane and Natalie or how they feel about their daughters.

Some parts could use paragraph breaks so the readers on mobile won't be daunted by the huge chunks of narrative paragraphs in the first chapters. 

What I appreciated was the character-building and your willingness to improve your work. There were some issues with spelling, punctuation, and tense consistency, but with some proofreading, I'm fairly certain you'll be able to polish off the chapters in no time. 

Good luck!

Hope this helped.


Your friendly critic,

M

Submit your story to the critique list if you want an honest feedback on your work. 


If you want a constructive critique or just an honest feedback on your book and writing skills, read the rules in the 1st chapter.


Note that my critiques can be pretty thorough (depending on my availability and mood of course), and they are far from overly generic and sugarcoated to the point of being unhelpful. This is not for authors who are merely fishing for compliments. As a content writer by profession, I have ample experience in non-fiction and technical writing, as well as proofreading and content editing.

building puzzles novel

Fixing Puzzles

I'm Her Favorite

Reborn at Boot Camp: General, Don't Mess Around!

Worth the Wait

Dimension System

Provocative Fiery Wife: My Superior is an Affectionate Spitfire

30 Doors

The Beast inside

The King’s Games

M's Book Reviews

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