74. Don't Tell Me You Wouldn't

       Waverly was out of the car right after her, catching her arm as she tried to stomp away. “Get in the damn car and stop being a child ,” she snapped when she turned to face her. 

       The redhead let out a small laugh. “I’m the one being a child?” 

       “Yes, Nicole, you are .” 

       “That’s funny coming from the one upset with me for hiding a secret ,” she retorted, waving her hands. 

       “Get in the car!” 

       “No!”

       Waverly dropped her voice, speaking through her teeth. “There is a cop watching us two rows over and up a bit. Get in the fucking car before he decides to come talk to us.” Nicole pursed her lips with a sigh, heading back towards the vehicle and climbing in. Waverly sat down, pulling her door shut. “ You said or I’ll talk . That means you did some illegal shit that you don’t want anyone to find out about. This isn’t some secret , Nicole, you are a Sheriff !”

       She crossed her arms, running her tongue along her teeth and tapping her foot as she looked out her window. “I’m not gonna talk about anything, so you mise well just drop it,” she mumbled. 

       Waverly stared at her, letting out a slow breath and leaning her head on her fist, looking out the windshield. “. . . Does Jeremy know?” 

       “ No one knows. And I’d like to keep it that way.” 

       The brunette’s eyes widened a bit. She knew Nicole had always told Jeremy everything . And everything meant literally everything. So the fact that he didn’t know about this scared her. “I don’t like this.” 

       Her head turned towards her. “Then drop it! You’re not entitled to know every single fucking detail of my life!” 

       “It’s not about that, Nicole! I know that!” 

       “Then what? Why are you so damn concerned about it?!” 

       She gripped her hand around the console as she turned a bit towards her. “I have never seen you look so fucking uncomfortable around somebody before. And you are not someone to be uncomfortable around anybody because you literally deal with drunks and murderers for a living . So I’m sorry that I am concerned , Nicole, but you putting your walls up like you used to only makes me ten million times more fucking concerned about it!” 

       Nicole stared out the window in silence for a few seconds. “No.”

       “No, what?” 

       “I’m not talking about it." 

       She figured that since her voice had gotten quiet, they were done arguing. "What are you so afraid of, Nic?" The redhead turned her head towards her with her jaw tightly clenched. Waverly's eyes softened and she cupped her hand over her's. "Baby." 

       "You're gonna hate me." 

       "I'm not gonna hate you." 

       "Yes you are." She pulled her foot back onto the seat and covered her face with one hand. 

       The brunette tugged it away. "Stop. I'd never hate you." 

       Nicole was quiet for a minute as she racked over her options. This was the last thing she wanted to deal with while they were here, but she knew she had to seeing that it had come about. "Ok." She rubbed her hand on her face, pushing her forehead to her knee and closing her eyes. "The lady?" 

       "Yea?"

       "She was my math teacher for my sophomore, junior, and senior year.”

       Waverly cocked an eyebrow slightly, but went with it. “. . . Ok.” 

       “I took algebra 2 10th grade, trig 11th, and pre-calc and calc 12th.” 

       “. . . Yea.” 

       She lifted her head slightly. “Small problem, though.” 

       “What?” 

       “I never took a math final my last two years.”

       The smaller girl tipped her head. “Were they not mandatory here?” 

       “No. They were.” 

       She sat back a bit, brows furrowed. “I’m lost now.” 

       Nicole slowly slouched back in her chair, crossing her arms. “I don’t know if you’ve realized, but I’m scary good at math. Always have been. It just came naturally.” 

       “Wynonna calls you a human calculator.”

       “Uh-huh. And the thing about being in high school is that you’re lazy, right?” Waverly nodded. “And you know I don’t like doing things I don’t want to do.” 

       “Mhm.” 

       “And that’s why I hated math. Because I’d learn it and understand it while everyone else needed a couple days. And then homework? Couldn’t stand it. You just did the same thing over and over.” 

       “That’s kinda the point . . .-” She stopped when Nicole threw her a look. 

       “Mrs. Summers obviously noticed it my sophomore year- she was fresh out of college and that was her first year teaching. I got hundreds on almost everything and if I didn’t, the amount of extra credit from bonuses on quizzes and tests made up for it. She ended up getting her schedule changed around the next year, so I had her for trig.” She shifted a bit in her seat. “I . . . was still pretty fucked up at that point from everything the year prior. I had no motivation for anything besides sports. I only did the bare minimum for my classes to keep high A’s cause Aunt Liz got on my ass when I started slacking. But something about math was particularly hard for me to want to do. So . . . I went to her during my study hall about a month after school started, which happened to be her prep hour, complaining that I didn’t wanna do my homework from that day. I asked her if there was any way I could get out of it, and . . .” She looked timidly up to Waverly, and judging by the look on her face, she had put the rest of the pieces in place. 

       She didn’t look angry, which she was thankful for. But she wasn’t smiling either. She still looked concerned, but now there was a layer of slight fear hiding underneath it. 

       Nicole swallowed, pulling her other knee up onto the seat and wrapping both arms around it. Her voice was noticeably quieter when she started again, “It was nothing at first. She told the office I was her aid, so I switched out of study hall to her room. And . . . we’d make out and she’d give me a hundred for the homework every night. But after a month or so . . . hands wandered more than usual and I was getting hundreds on quizzes and tests, too. When December rolled around, I had to douse myself in body spray to get her smell off me before I went to History.”

       She looked to Waverly again, seeing the pain in her eyes. “Baby . . . You were 16 .” 

       “I know it was wrong, Wave. I mean, she had a husband and a one-year-old-”

       “No. She was wrong. She took advantage of you-” 

       Nicole shook her head. “I knew exactly what I was doing.”

       "That doesn’t mean anyt-” 

       “It was just as much me as it was her. And she made sure that I was ok with it. Yea, I was underage, but it’s not like she was . . .- It wasn’t like that. I was lazy, so I helped her out and she helped me out.” 

       “Nicole, if it were me and I was telling you this, you’d already have a shotgun loaded with bullets labeled rapist , don’t tell me you wouldn’t.” 

       Her face twinged at the word and she sunk farther in the seat, knowing from a law standpoint it was true. “It wasn’t every day . I would help her grade papers and stuff some days. Same when senior year rolled around. Maybe she got her schedule switched around for a third time on purpose and maybe she had gotten me put in her class on purpose, I dunno, but I had her again . . . And before I knew it, it was the same thing all over again.” She rubbed her hands down her cheeks. “When I turned 18, it got to a point where she was buying me alcohol, but then I realized she was doing that to try and convince me to meet her outside of school. I don’t think she understood that I was literally counting down the hours until I was able to get the fuck out of this state, so I turned her down every time she asked. I didn’t want anything with her. I just wanted to skip out of math. But she wanted more than just an at-school fuck . . . I promised her I’d meet her if she faked my last final for me. But I never did. I graduated and then I was gone.” She shook her head, pushing her face to her knees. “I’m disgusting.” 

       Waverly lifted her head up, turning it towards her. “It’s not your fault.” 

       “Yes it is!” She retorted. 

       “You said it yourself. You were still broken. And she used it to her advantage.” 

       Nicole shook her head. “I let it happen, Waverly. She didn’t use me.” 

       “Who proposed it? You or her?” She questioned. 

       The redhead took a second, thinking back. She swallowed when she remembered, looking down a bit. “Her,” she mumbled. 

       “And you were uncomfortable at first, weren’t you?” 

       “Yea . . .” 

       Waverly let out a sigh, pushing her door open and walking around to her side, opening her door and coaxing her out. The redhead took her hand, climbing out of the car. “Look at me.” She tipped her head up, holding it there with each of her hands on her cheeks. “I don’t care how many times you say it, this is not your fault. You were unstable and she knew it, and I’m sure they were still messing with your meds at this point, trying to get a good prescription, weren’t they?” She nodded slowly. “Maybe you did have a say on what was going on, but she was the one at fault here, not you. Do you understand me?” 

       “Yea,” she said, barely above a whisper. 

       Waverly swallowed. “And . . .” She dropped her hands, pushing one through her hair. “Baby, you can let this go. You need to tell someone, she could still be doing this to other kids.” 

       Her eyes widened and she quickly shook her head. “She’s not.” 

       “You don’t know that.” 

       “No. She told me. I was the only one.” 

       “She was probably lying , Nic.”

       “She wasn’t. I kinda threatened her and she told me she hadn’t.” 

       The brunette sighed, “Still. This is serious, Baby. She can’t just live life like it didn’t happen.” 

       Nicole swallowed, “You heard her. If I talk, I’ll lose everything.”

       “No, you won’t.”

       “Baby, my name was all around the country my senior year- I know you’ve looked me up before. And colleges still know who I am. I did interviews and shit for ESPN ‘n MLB News wrote a couple of articles on me. If I press charges, it’ll be picked up around here and then someone’s gonna recognize my name in another state and bring it to their news, and it’ll just keep spreading. Sooner or later, someone above me’s gonna hear about it, seeing how I cheated my way through high school, and I’m gonna get fired . . . Not to mention how I’ll lose every ounce of respect around here. They’ll rip all my signs down at the school . . . It’s just not worth it. It’s over and done with.” 

       Waverly clenched her jaw slightly as Nicole looked down, seeming to be shaking her head at herself. She pulled her into a hug, slowly rubbing her hand up and down her back as she bunched the back of her dress up in her hands, letting out a shaky breath into her shoulder. 

       She pulled away after a minute, letting out a raspberry. “Ok . . . I’m good now.”

       “You sure?” 

       “I’m sure,” she confirmed, giving her hand a squeeze.

       “If you say so.” Waverly leaned up and pressed a kiss to her lips. “You drive. I have no idea where I am.” Nicole let out a little laugh, shaking her head at her as she turned and walked around to the other side. 

.  .  .

       “Why do we do this to ourselves?” Waverly mumbled, rubbing her temples as she leaned back in her seat. 

       “Shh.” Nicole adjusted the sunglasses on her face, trying to tune out the loud noise of the plane. 

       It had happened again. They had gone out the night before their flight and gotten wasted. But instead of a yacht club party, it had been a gay bar. So on top of the stench of very fruity cocktails, they were covered in glitter from head to toe. 

       “We’re gonna sleep. And in four hours, we’ll be able to sleep while Gus drives us home. Where we can sleep some more,” Nicole slurred, knowing she was in that grey area between drunk and hangover where you’re feeling the pain, but also that numbness.

       The brunette had already hit hangover a few hours ago, so anything relating to closing her eyes sounded good. 

       The couple trudged through baggage claim and customs like zombies, finally being greeted by Gus’ smiling face. Her brow slowly furrowed, though, as they got closer, seeing just how messed up they were. “I’d take it y’all had a good time?” She asked, crossing her arms and holding down a laugh when they stopped in front of her. 

       “Yea,” they mumbled. 

       She shook her head, pushing off the railing she was leaning back on. “Alright. Let’s get you two home.” They walked out of the airport and headed towards the car, climbing in and passing out on top one another within 10 minutes of the drive. 

       Gus dropped them directly at their house, helping them lug their bags in. And with a quick text to Nedley that Waverly’d be over the following morning to get the cats, they were out again, both somehow on the wrong end of the bed. 

.  .  . 

       BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP !

       Nicole lifted her head from the bed, eyes blinking open for the first time since midday the previous date. She let out a grunt, flipping over and digging her phone out of her pocket to shut her alarm off. 

       “Mm.” 

       She turned her head, seeing Waverly rubbing her face as she untangled her legs from the blanket. “Mm.” 

       “‘Time is it?” She mumbled groggily. 

       “7:30.” 

       “Mm.” She rolled over and fit herself into her side, throwing her arm across her middle.

       “You feeling ok?” The redhead questioned, pushing a kiss to her forehead. 

       “Yea. You?” 

       “Better than I thought I would,” she admitted. 

       “Tha’s good,” she sighed, closing her eyes again. 

       “Mm-mnm. I gotta get ready.” She wiggled out from under Waverly’s arm, rolling off the bed. 

       “Nooo,” she whined, looking up at her with puppy dog eyes. “5 more minutes.” Nicole gave her a look, tipping her head. “Pwease?” 

       She pursed her lips before letting out a sigh, climbing back on the bed and pulling her into her arms when she laid down. “5 minutes. That’s it.” 

       “Mm.” A smile dusted her features as she snuggled into her front. 

       Nicole waited about six minutes for the smaller one to fall asleep before slowly moving her off of her, gathering her uniform and heading to the bathroom to shower. 

       When she got out, she found her in the living room curled up on the couch with a cup of coffee in one hand and her kindle in the other. She tugged her boots on and clipped her utility belt on before grabbing an orange. She walked over to her, leaning her arms on the back of the couch as she peeled it. “Whatcha readin’?” 

       “Unbroken,” she answered, taking the orange slice she offered her. 

       “What’s that?” 

       “World War II story about this Olympic runner from the US who enlisted after the war broke out, but his bomber plane crashed in the Pacific. He survived by a miracle and was stranded in the middle of the ocean until the Japanese found him over a month later and took him to a POW camp . . . That’s about where I’m at.” She gave a little shrug. “It’s good so far.”

       “Is it a true story?” 

       “Yep.” 

       She did a slow nod. “Hmm. Sounds cool.” 

       “I think there’s a movie on it now.” 

       “And we’re gonna watch it when you’re done?” 

       “Of course we are.” 

       Nicole chuckled with a smile. That was a usual occurrence. Waverly would read something and see there was a movie for it and then they would watch it and she’d complain about how the book was so much better the whole time. 

       The redhead walked around and sat next to her, tipping her head up into a kiss. “I love you.” 

       Waverly cupped her face, bringing her in again. “I love you, too.” 

       “D’you just plan on staying here until your shift after you get the kids?” 

       She rolled her eyes at her, for she always called the cats that. “I might go see Wy and Alice later, I dunno. I’ve got a couple of papers due next week, too, so I might get a jumpstart on that.” 

       Nicole nodded, pressing one last kiss to her lips and squeezing her thigh as she stood. “I’ll bring you some lunch if you’re here, or everybody some if you’re there.” 

       “Such a kind Sheriff,” she grinned as Nicole headed for the door. 

       “Oh, you know I am,” she smirked, throwing her a wink before pulling it closed behind her.

       She knew Waverly would end up getting wrapped up in her school work and not have enough time to run by the Homestead, so her offer was merely to sound nice. She, though, didn’t have to be at work until 9 and it wasn’t even 8:30, so she decided she’d go pay Wynonna a visit. She hadn’t seen her or her niece since they had left, after all. 

       She pulled up the bumpy drive and parked her cruiser, climbing out and walking inside. She first spotted Doc on the couch, playing with Alice, and she could hear Wynonna talking in the kitchen. She smiled at him, but his face looking up at her seemed to not be as welcoming. He was shaking his head with wide eyes, flicking his eyes towards in the direction of the older Earp. 

       Nicole gently closed the door. “What?” She asked in a whisper, walking over. 

       “I’d advise you greatly to not walk in that kitchen,” he warned. 

       “Why not?” She lifted up Alice with a smile when Doc offered her up, peppering her face with kisses as the baby made excited screeching noises. “Hi, Honey!- Woah, you got big!” 

       “Well. It seems that-”

       “ Dimples !” 

       Nicole looked up, seeing that Wynonna had noticed she had arrived. “Earp!”

       The brunette called her over with her hand, so she walked in after giving the gunslinger a nervous glance, seeing that the wall had been shielding who she had been talking to. She had figured it was Gus, but the woman sitting at the table was certainly not her. She pulled her tie out of Alice’s hand, giving her a smile. 

       The woman quickly rose from her seat, taking a step towards her. She furrowed her brows as she got right in her bubble, pushing her finger against the nametag on her uniform. “Uhm-” 

       She looked towards Wynonna for a beat as she walked over and took Alice, but they were immediately back on the redhead. Her eyes squinted and Nicole stared back at her in utter confusion. 

       “You’re Sheriff Haught?” She questioned. 

       “I am,” she confirmed with a nod. 

       “And you’re planning to marry my daughter?”