CHAPTER ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY NINE

Logan and his father has been gone for such a long time, that I couldn't relax, much less sleep. The way dad glared at Logan and spoke to him scared me.

What happened between them, especially with Logan finding the entire thing funny.

I was nervous and mom was too drunk to care.

Why is mom hitting the bottle this much? I need to make time to spend talking to her about what or if anything is bothering her.

Since I met her, she's supported and encouraged me. Even though Logan pushed me unto her radar, she chose me and give me my first big break into the world of fashion and into Logan's world.

I was surprised that she didn't object to Logan and I being together, in spite of our different in status and wealth.

I will spend time with her today, I promised myself, as I sat in the living room staring at a blank TV screen.

It was after three in the morning and everyone is asleep, except the guards on duty and I.

I miss Justin and Cameron, because they are easy to talk to always keep me company in the kitchen.

Darn Cameron!

He likes me? I laugh mockingly at myself. A pregnant woman confined to a wheelchair.

God, I hope I can be normal around him now, especially when Logan is here. I will try to keep my distance without making him feel uneasy at all times.

Logan and I still have to discuss the C-section Dr. Morris intends to do on my seventh month.

I have been researching it and have found out that it is safe and has been done under different circumstances, so I have already made up my mind but I have yet to hear Logan's views.

With or without him, I am going ahead with it.

I won't express my fears after the baby comes and what my condition could be like.

Dr. Morris wants to run some tests to monitor me for a few days at the hospital, something I still have to discuss with Logan, because these tests isn't about the baby, whose doing great, but it's about me and my spine.

I will discuss this with mom and she will encourage Logan to support my decisions, for my future and my body.

Hitting my head against the long sofa mom and dad added to the decor of the cabin. I love the brown tones and the blends.

I can't wait for Logan and I to make this our permanent home away from home, because when Logan resumes him law practice, he will want to remain closer to the city and I will want to resume my photography career if possible or continue onwards with my degree.

I want to get some documents done incase I end up not surviving the surgery, to make sure Jer is taken care of, but I cannot do it through Logan, who will have a fit if he hears of my plans.

Sighing deeply, wiping my hands over my face, adjusting my messy bun.

"You're still awake or you can't sleep?" Mom asks behind my back.

"Both" I chuckle, "are you joining me?" I ask but I didn't turn around, because I would have to lift my entire body to face her, but I did sit up.

"Do you want this sofa?" I asked, before she takes the other long sofa connected to the one I'm on, making a L shape.

"I'm good, just a headache." Mom says lying on a cushion with her eyes closed.

"I'm so thirsty," she was saying moving with her eyes closed to get up.

Stopping her before she falls, "I'll get you something, wait here." I offered, placing my feet on the floor to gently lift myself up, so that I don't jerk my back.

"Something very, very, cold," mom yelled as I hobble away towards the kitchen.

Taking out a cokes, which I used in college for hangovers and a cold chocolate drink for myself, before rejoining mom in the living room.

Sensing me approaching, mom stretches out her hand for the drink, "Jamie, I'll make it up to you, but I can't right now. You know that don't you?" Mom asks, opening her eyes to open her cokes and immediately started drinking, without taking a break.

Thank God it's a small one.

I returned to the sofa I was occupying and sat down, before punching a straw into my drink.

I looked across to see mom staring at me, suddenly making me self-conscious.

"Is something wrong?" I asked her quickly, staring back at her.

Emptying her drink in her mouth, mom nods, "I want to tell you something but I don't want to upset you" mom was saying.

"Okay," I said suddenly afraid to hear what she has to say but yet still, I need to know what is bothering her, even if it is about me. "I'm listening." I said, encouraging her to continue.

Taking a deep breath, she comes to join me on the sofa.

"It's Logan" she starts and I froze.

He's cheating on me, was the first thing to cross my mind.

"Okay" was all I could muster, as I felt my heart pounding against my chest.

"I have this horrible feeling that after Logan defeats his grandfather, he and Francis will continue down this path." She says and that being the last thing I expected to hear, stunned me.

Turning to face her, "this is their life. A life they were born into. A life I took them away from and a life they will continue to live till they die and I cannot do this Jamie, I just can't" mom cries, leaning her head on my shoulder.

Adjusting my arm, I drew her closer, allowing her to cry, but unable to join her, even though we're both stuck in the same deliminar.

I know she's not lying.

Logan's way to comfortable and at ease with life.