Chapter two

 It's been 3 years since that day. I made a vow to myself to never fall in love again. Since then, I never really gotten myself back into "dating" or even looked at a guy, to be honest. I just have been doing nothing really. I mean sure, there would be one night stands here and there but that's really it. Really don't trust men to be in a relationship with one away.

I even moved out of my old house. Couldn't stand to stay there knowing he was there and probably had girls over there while I was gone.  

I was in bed looking out my window when my mama came bursting into my room. I closed my eyes and let out a big sigh. Sometimes I wish I didn't give her a spare key to my apartment. 

"Raine, get the hell out of this bed. You've been stuck in this damn room for days now. You need to get up and at least take a shower. Or get something to eat," mama said coming to my side of the bed with her hands on her hips looking down at me. 

I looked up at her with tired blurry eyes. "ma, I don't feel like it." 

"I don't care what you don't feel like  doing." she said sternly. "get your ass up and get in the shower." She grabbed the covers and pulled them off me. I groaned as the cold air hit my whole body. I was only wearing a shirt and underwear. 

Mama just smiled at me, seeing as I'm starting to get up. I rolled my eyes and sat up. My hands were wandering everywhere on my bedside table, looking for my glasses, when I finally touched them. I put them on and stood up. 

"I'll be in the kitchen cooking," she said while walking out of the room. 

"Okay," I muttered. I looked down at the dresser and see my phone. I tapped the home button and saw that it was 3:24 pm. 

 Walking towards my window and looking outside. Moving into an apartment has its advantages. One being the view. Rethinking earlier thoughts, I let out a big sigh. Sometimes I wish I could forget that day. Maybe then my trust and idea of love wouldn't be so fucked up to how it is now.

I sighed and turned to go into the bathroom to start my shower.  

~~~

Stepping out of the bathroom, the smell of baked chicken and macaroni instantly hit my nostrils. I hurried up and walking into my closet and put my dirty clothes in the bin in the corner. I put on my undergarments. 

I put on a pair of light blue skinny jeans and a dark green sweater and some white socks. Once I put the clothes on and grabbed my phone I headed towards the kitchen. When I went in, I saw mama getting plates out of the dishwasher. 

"Is the food ready?" I asked her while standing at the little island in the middle of the kitchen. I pulled out the seat and sat down. 

"Yeah," she responded. She set the plates down and began putting food on it. "so, how have you been? I haven't seen you in like 2 weeks."

"I've been alright. A little bummed out I guess. Just didn't feel like being bothered with anybody. No offense." I said to her. She set my plate down and took a seat in front of me. 

"It's alright I guess, " she said

"No offense ma, but why did you come over here." I tried to ask without sounding rude. 

She looked up from her plate and gave me that look. I looked away. " I wasn't saying it like that, but you did come here unexpected ma. I mean you did burst into my room." I said shrinking back into my seat. 

"mmhhmm. I came over here to see how you are doing. I mean you didn't call or text. What the hell am I suppose to think? You didn't even talk to Charlotte, and she's your best friend" she exclaimed. 

I looked down at my food and pushed the food around. "you're making me feel bad now." I muttered. Maybe I should call her later on. "I think I'm gonna call her later on," I said. My shoulders sagged once I realized that I haven't talked to my best friend in days. I've been so cooped up in my apartment and drowning myself in misery, I haven't even bothered to talk to anybody. 

Mama looked up at me from her food. "Good. Maybe yall should go out somewhere. Maybe to the park, go shopping or something," she said finishing up her food. She got up and put her plate in the sink, washed it and put it in the dishwasher. 

Looking down at my plate and seeing that I didn't finish it, I got up and put in the fridge. I turned around and saw mama leaning on the counter looking at me with her arms crossed. 

"I'm about to call her and see what she wants to do. That's if she wants to go anyway" I said shrugging my shoulders. I pulled my phone from my back pocket and dialed charlottes number. 

I put the phone to my ear and waited for her to answer. "well damn, look who finally called." she greeted. I looked down at my toes smiling. "yeah I know. My bad for not calling you for days, but the phone does work both ways." I said 

"True," she agrees "guess we're both at fault here," she replied laughing. 

I chuckled "anyway since we haven't seen each other in a minute, do you want to go out or something.  You know like go down to The Friendly Bean or something." I suggested    

"Sure" she agreed. "Ima just meet you down there in like 30 minutes okay?" She questioned. 

"Yeah, see you later," I said 

"Yeah" she muttered. I ended the call and looked back at mama who was smiling at me. I rolled my eyes "what?"I mumbled. I crossed my foot over the other. 

"Nothing. Just glad you finally getting out of out the apartment." she chuckled. "alright since you're about to go, I'll just leave. There's leftover food so just put it in the refrigerator." she told me. She grabbed her purse from the living room couch and walked towards the front door. After she put on her shoes she turned around and gave me a hug. 

I hugged her back. "I love you monkey" she whispered in my ear. I laughed and pulled away from the hug. "I love you too ma, ill call you later," I told her. 

"You better," she said sternly. I smiled at her as she walked out the door. Soon I heard her car engine turn on and her car driving away. 

I sighed, realizing that I'm alone. I never liked the quiet. I always think I hear things and then get all paranoid and shit. That's why I always have something on, whether it be the tv, or music playing. 

I walked to my room and went into the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror and let out a big breath. I really don't feel like doing my hair. So I guess I'll just put it into an Afro. I picked up the pick and started to pick my hair out. Once it was the way that I wanted it to be, I put on a pair of small hoop earrings and some lip gloss. 

Once I checked my self one last time, I put on my green and white vans that matches my sweater. 

I grabbed my keys off of the bedside table, I walked outside and locked my door. I walked down the hallway. I decided to take the staired today for some unknown reason, once I got to the garage floor. I walked towards my car, got in, and headed towards The Friendly Bean.