I'm Screaming Mercy, Mercy… Please

[TAMIKO]

"I'll be going now, Gabriel. Mourn your dead… and my condolences." 

"Please… I have… I have lost everything, Iko. Please, I can't lose you too," Gabe pleaded as he fell to his knees. He was feeling so lost and his grief was clouding his senses. 

In less than twenty-four hours he had managed to lose three of his best wolves and his father was not showing any signs of proper recovery either. He was alone, with no one to hold on to.

"Reject me then. Please," Gabe begged and Tamiko stopped in his tracks. There had never been a day when he had imagined Gabe would be the one begging for a rejection. Over time, Tamiko was sure Gabe would reject him first. 

He was sure that the young alpha was just waiting to be cocky enough and while that didn't mean shit to Tamiko, given he had Igor, he was looking forward to it. However, hearing the young alpha talk like that, was putting a damper on his plans

"A rejection is too good a mercy for you, young Grealor. There are lessons that you must learn, and I bet you will feel them soon enough. Until then, mourn, for there will come a time when your tears will burn your face and your voice will force your mouth shut. 

"Be a good alpha and work your way through that," Igor said and Gabriel felt his heart shatter into a thousand pieces. He knew very well what Kosta had meant to him, feeling the lesson was soon enough. 

Yesterday, he felt his chest hurt like he had never felt before. He was around Tamiko's shelter at the time, and he knew, when he heard moans, that they were the reason his chest was constricting too hard. 

And looking at the smug stare Igor was giving him, Gabe knew he was hellbound, and not even a soul would step forward to support or help him. He was completely and utterly alone.

"Grealor is boring with all the grief in the air, you would think someone special died," Tamiko said nonchalantly, as he and Kosta walked past the wolves. He knew he was being mean but these people had done worse to him. 

They should have been thankful that he hadn't burned down the entire pack, however tempting it had been yesterday. Or maybe it was still part of the plan, but only in the future, right?

"I have to go bounty hunting. Wanna come along, dusha?" Kosta suddenly asked and Tamiko stared at his mate like that was the best thing he had heard since morning and the screams that had erupted from Gabe's helplessness yesterday and today.

"Of course! I thought you would never ask!" Tamiko said excitedly and Kosta just laughed. He knew the young Lycan so well and how the kid was bound to be excited about things like that, so he was happy.

"All right. In that case, hold me tight, we are heading back to Kawai for the instructions," Kosta said and Tamiko paled. 

Maybe it was because of the things he had done yesterday; the thought of alpha Ashton having murdered his mother. Or maybe it was because, for the first time since Tamiko had met Kosta, Tamiko felt sure of where home was. 

Tamiko Hinata was truly scared of the idea that Kawai was his home and he had been haunted by dreams of what would happen if he stepped back there as the prince of the deadliest kingdom ever. 

The Lycans were sensitive and closed creatures. They never accepted anyone just for the sake of it, and just because he had dined with the king at the high table didn't mean that he would be able to fit in as much. 

Tamiko was scared of the possibility that the Lycans would reject him for the monster he had become. He had grown cold over the years and Tamiko hated that it would eat at him eventually. 

He had no control over that but goddamn, maybe there was a way out of this. And maybe not going, was the only way out, right?

"Kawai?" Tamiko asked after a long silence and Kosta was genuinely worried for him.

"Yes, did you not like it there?" Kosta asked tenderly, his voice so full of love.

"I—" Tamiko tried but his words were stuck in his throat. He had spent so many years trying to prove himself that there was more to him, and yet one week in Kawai got him wondering where he fit in.

"What is it, my beautiful?" the Lycan chief asked, staring at his Erasthai hoping to the goddess that there was something that was eating at him hopelessly or even tying someone in Kawai had hurt him.

If ever that were the case, Kosta would ruin them without question.

"Who will I go back to? Being your erasthai when I'm still mated to Gabe? Lord Sadako's adoptive nephew? The dark king's new friend? Or the missing prince? I don't know where I stand, Kosta," Tamiko said earnestly.

Igor felt his heart break for the boy beside him. He had seen Tamiko at his worst, and while he was tempted to tell the kid that was all of the above and he didn't need to worry about his true identity, Kosta knew he couldn't. 

The Lycan king had his speculations. 

The Lycan Lord had his speculations too. 

The truth was somewhere in the air and yet no one had really stepped forward to embrace him as any of that, other than the fact that Kosta had accepted him.

However, even with Kosta, Tamiko still had to deal with the bond that linked him to Gabe, something that would take a minute because of Tamiko's desire for revenge. What the hell was he supposed to do then?

"Tamiko…" Kosta said, dropping all the pet names. He knew this was not going to be easy for his erasthai, but he also knew that Tamiko had to be ready for that day, no matter what would come their way. It was a given.

"What if—"

"If you start questioning yourself too much, you will lose sight of who you are. Who you truly are, and that could cost you more than just a throne or your revenge. It could cost you everything, my prince.

"The Grealor wolves will soon connect the dots and figure out that you are the missing Kawai heir, and undoubtedly, they will try to sell that information to any willing buyer. That should not be a problem, but it could be if you're scared of who you truly are.

"King Zaffuto knows, Tamiko… He already knows you're his son and he's still working his way to you. I know that is a little too sudden, given how we came from Kawai, but as your Lycan chief, and someone under your command, I need to be truthful with you.

"Lord Sadako coming to insist on the faux-dead warrior is not just because we Lycans are ruthless and mindless. But he did that for you, to remind everyone what happens when anyone messes with Kawai.

"Everything lord Sadako has done to this point is because he knew from the very beginning who you truly were. But all of that will be pointless, if you question yourself, love. 

"I know and I understand you, moya dusha, but will Kawai do the same for a prince scared of answering the call back home?" Kosta asked and Tamiko stared in silence.