Change in Perspective pt 2

Asuka POV:

"I hurt her. I hurt her. I hurt her."

Those words reverberated in my mind as I ran back to my motel room. 

"I hurt her. I hurt her. I hurt her. Almost killed her."

A flash from the dream that I had almost forgotten flashed into my mind. The sight was me, standing behind Amelia with her hand through stomach. And those chilling words replayed in her head.

'You'd better hurry. Or her blood is on your hands.'

Losing focus on where I was running, I tripped on a stone in the ground and fell hard on the ground.

"Hey, are okay," a woman said. 

But as she got closer, reaching her hand out, I swatted it away.

"DON'T TOUCH ME," I yelled, making the woman flinch back so hard she almost fell over.

 Seeing the fear in the woman's eyes made me widen my eyes in shock at what I had done.

"I...I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

She was about to say something but I hadn't stuck around to listen. 

I channeled anima into my feet, and took one large leap on the roof of a building. I jumped from roof to roof to avoid risking hurting somebody else. I didn't even go through the door to get into the motel. I jumped towards my window and gripped onto the frame. I then opened the window and dropped to the ground without closing it. I sat there pathetically, sweating and gasping for air. I then opened my shaking palms and stared at them silently. I put my palms to my face and leaned back to the wall trying to relax. I then took a couple deep breath till my breathing was even.

"I can't go near her. Not after what happened. She'll wind up dead. I can't allow that to happen."

Flashing in my mind, I remembered her parents and her current mental state. I grabbed my hair to the point of nearly tearing it out of my head. I was lost at now what I should do. Stay away from Amelia and keeping her alive but resigning her to her delusions for the rest of her life or continuing to try and help her but risking her life at the same time. Conflicting feelings were ripping at my mind. 

After keeping silent for a while, Annie finally spoke up. But her voice was muffled amongst the thoughts running through her head.

"ASUKA!"

I nearly snapped my spine with how hard I flinched.

"Focus. Your need to control yourself Asuka. Your contra is starting to flow out," she said sternly, "I'm not going to pretend like I understand how you feel, but I do know the last thing you'd want is to harm anyone else by losing control."

I realized that my contra had been leaking out and had already leaked into the rooms beside, below and above me. I quickly pulled it back into my body.

"Now, we need to prioritize the mission and find the demon and the humans it's working with alright. Amelia's situation comes second no matter what. You must remember that."

My fists clenched and jaw tightened at her cold words. I wanted to respond, to argue something back but I knew that she was right. Hesitantly and with a bit of force, I slowly nodded my head. I heard Annie sigh inside me.

"Good. Now, the man who owns the steakhouse you and Amelia were headed towards was one of the names Ichigo had on his list. You should head there first and try to get some information out of him. I'll help if need be."

"...yeah..."

There was an palpable silence between us for a while before Annie spoke up again.

"I know I implied we'll help Amelia after our mission. But honestly, forget her. At least.....until you finally have full control of your contra."

The words were cold, but the usual confidence in her voice was gone. Despite not liking her in the beginning, Annie started to warm up to Amelia as I started to spend more time with her and I knew she wanted to help her almost as much as I do. But, she has always been logical. So despite despising what she said, she knew that it was for the best. No. For my best.

~

"The abduction's huh? Yeah I know a thing or two about it."

The burly man standing in front of me, named Jonathan was the owner of the steakhouse. He had a bald head with a big and bushy mustache and a stubble on his chin. Despite his rather imposing body, he wore a kind and welcoming expression on his face. 

"Any information at all would be helpful sir. Many people are at risk if this problem keeps going on," I replied.

The man nodded in agreement of Asuka's statement. 

"Yes. But I'm risking a lot by telling you anything, so....um....I'd like something in return," the man said a bit hesitantly scratching his beard.

I wasn't surprised by the mans statement. Looking at him, anyone would've thought he was more of a selfless person. But I realize that due to the heavy taxes on the people, he's just trying to get some extra money to live. Or so that's what I thought.

"Fine. So long that it is within reason I'll do it."

He gave me a kind smile and gestured me to follow him to the freezer room of the steakhouse where non of his employees could hear us. As we walked, I couldn't help but notice that the some other people working with the man were staring at me. I couldn't quite read their expression but I could sense their feelings of angst. I didn't know why they were so tense, but just in case I was on my toes from then on.

We entered the freezer and he then locked the wooden door behind us. In the freezer, there were many wooden crates spread across the floor. One of the crates was open and looking peeping inside one I saw slabs of meat surrounded by blood stained ice. The sunlight shined through the window illuminating some of the dust particles in the air.

"Now that we have some privacy, lets begin."

Trying to look calm I leaned on the wooden wall and crossed my arms.

"Yes. And make sure you tell me everything."

The man tried to hide the shiver that went down his spine. I put a bit of malice in my words just to get the point across.

~

The conversation with Mr. Jonathan had ended and I was now walking back to the motel. Most of the things he had to say were things that I already knew like the fact a demon was the perpetrator and that there were humans as well. But there was one important piece of information he had. A location.

"A cave south to this town. This makes things easier," Annie spoke.

"Are we sure that we can trust his word? He seemed to be genuine, but the other workers were acting strange. They tried to hide it, but they kept giving me weird glances from the side of their eye. I don't know what their deal was but it was still off putting. It also wouldn't be too far fetched to think that Mr. Jonathan knew the reason for their behavior and was simply feigning ignorance," I thought to her.

"Plus, how did he even get that information? I'm not sure we can trust him fully."

Annie scoffed at what I said.

"Obviously we can't trust him. But I doubt he's lying. Even if the demon hadn't taken his wife, he still has every reason to want that demon dead."

"I guess that makes sense."

"But before we make any moves against the demon, you must get better at manipulating your contra."

A small shiver ran up my spine as I remembered the feeling of having contra run through my body. It was something I never wanted to feel again. I was satisfied with just using anima for the rest of my life. But I knew where Annie was coming from. One big advantage demons have against humans is their ability to absorb anima through their black flames. This is something that has made demons almost unbeatable for humans. I knew that in order to fight against them I needed to master my contra. But the fear of giving control to those hidden impulses was so overwhelming. 

Sensing my confliction, Annie sighed and spoke up.

"Your worry is unwarranted Asuka. If anything happens, I'm still here."

She gave me a reassuring yet cocky smile.

"I'll put you in your place if you ever cross a line."

My lips curved ever so slightly. But as I made it up the stair to my floor, a familiar face was waiting for me at the door. She was still wearing the dress she wore earlier and her hair was still done as well. My smile instantly faded as she turned to me.

"A-Amelia..I....."

'I'm so shocked <(-o-) >.'

Before I even finished my sentence, Amelia walked up to me confidently and got on her knees to bowed.

"I AM SO SORRY FOR WHAT I DID TODAY ASUKA! PLEASE FORGIVE ME!"

I crouched down beside her and tried to gently grabbed her shoulder to pull her off the ground.

"Please. Amelia, don't," I begged, "You did nothing wrong alright. So please stand. I promise you I'm fine."

The girl then looked up and stared into my eyes. Her face then scowled which had caught me off guard. She realized she must have looked like and quickly softened her face. She then poked her finger into my shoulder.

"Don't lie to me Asuka. You may think you can fool me. But your eyes betray you."

I looked down, unable to face her. But she grabbed my cheeks and made me. A face of determination looked back at me.

"Let me help you."

I didn't know what expression I had on my face. I didn't even know how to react. She felt my contra. The malice. The bloodlust. Even if it was only a snippet of the full thing, it still would've driven any regular person to near insanity. Yet she still....

Amelia suddenly stretched out her arms and rubbed my eyes. She then wrapped her arms around me in a warm embrace. All I could do in that moment was kneel there and sob into her shoulder.

"It's alright Asuka. You don't have to burden yourself anymore. I'll help you carry that burden. I promise."