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Shattered.

I met her today.

I was having a nice day. After a long time, I came out of my sorrow and spending time with my friends. We went to the mall, watched a movie and having dinner. We were talking about all kinds of things-movies, girls, funny moments, things I missed out. I was having a good laugh and for the first time, felt normal since the day she left me.

Then I saw her. I decided to ignore her. But she was walking in my direction all along making an eye contact. A range of emotions from sadness to anger aroused in me. What she is doing? Why can't she leave me alone?

She stopped inches before me and 'Hi'-ed everyone. An awkward silence rules for a few seconds and then she said 'Hi'. I decided to act normal if not happy. I faked a smile and reciprocated her 'Hi' adding a 'How are you?' to it.

My friends politely went from there on some pretext. I think it's for the best. I don't want them to see my emotional outburst( it might happen) of any emotion.

She said, 'How are YOU?'. Then she looked at me, half-trying to read me. The other half put a face of pity for me. No, I don't want her to give that. I think now that I pulled the feat of being happy and said with a wide smile-I am alright. Tell me about you?. Then her expressions changed to that of pure bliss.

After that, she talked about how she felt it might be awkward, how she felt sorry for me, how she's happy too-for me and for her and many other things which I don't remember or didn't hear at all.

I just stopped at the pure bliss part. It reminded me of her during our initial days of love. The way she talks to me, sees me, shows her affection through smallest of things and her spiritedness overall which she has lost during our final days. She reminded me of the person who was happy in my company. But today, she is the same 'without me'. And I was my broken self.

I cried after returning to my room. I took all my pain out.

I met her today. And that was the last time I mourned for our love which was long dead even before we fell apart.

“Without Me”

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